


Forces of Desire

by Love_andbalance



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Angry Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Armitage Hux Lives, Babies, Balanced Force, Childbirth, Consensual Sex, Emperor Kylo Ren, Empress Rey, Enemies to Lovers, Experienced Ben Solo, F/M, Force Bond (Star Wars), Force Dyad (Star Wars), Force Ghosts, Force Visions, Happy Ending, Minor Finn/Rose Tico, No Rey Skywalker, Oral Sex, Politics, Post-Canon, Post-Canon Fix-It, Pregnancy, Rey is Not a Palpatine, Reylo - Freeform, Rough Sex, Size Kink, Soul Bond, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, Virgin Rey, force bond sex, reverse Anidala
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-04
Updated: 2021-01-21
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:14:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 31
Words: 156,443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22553095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Love_andbalance/pseuds/Love_andbalance
Summary: You feel so familiar...I must have loved you in more than one lifetime.  -N. R. HartDays after the Resistance was nearly wiped out at the Battle of Crait, Rey and new Supreme Leader Kylo Ren are forced to realize that the bond between them was not extinguished when they went their separate ways.As the implications of their connection begin to become clear and they realize that their destinies are entwined, a new threat rises that threatens to destroy them all.“Whatever this bond is between us, it doesn’t seem to be going away,” Rey hissed through clenched teeth. “We have to deal with that, somehow, but we are still on opposite sides of a war. You chose that.”“Not much of a war,” he quipped with a nasty smirk. “There is almost nothing left of the Resistance and the First Order’s power still spreads. As for the bond between us,” he glanced pointedly at the spot on his chest where her head had been resting, “you didn’t seem to mind it last night.”
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 416
Kudos: 641
Collections: #CelebrateBenSolo - A Ben Solo Fan Event





	1. Bonded

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The course of true love never did run smooth. -William Shakespeare

Rey sat at a table with several other members of what little remained of the Resistance and listened inattentively to yet another heated discussion between General Leia Organa and Poe Dameron. This time it was about planets that could serve as a suitable place for a temporary safe haven.

She couldn't remember what it was about last time or the time before.

They were all currently floating through space huddled wearily on the Millennium Falcon, which she and Chewie had landed on a large asteroid deep in the Outer Rim. She was unfamiliar with most of the systems they were discussing and, as such, had little useful information to add.

Truthfully, even if she had been knowledgeable enough to have an opinion, there was little energy left in her for arguing.

She heard Poe briefly mention Tatooine, and Leia’s incensed voice responded something about sand, someone named Jabba the Hutt, and a bikini but she was too tired to make any sense of that. It was clear enough that Leia did not want to go to Tatooine, but they would need a place soon.

They would need food and beds for everyone. There were simply too many of them for them to be comfortable crammed into such a small space.

In the three days since they had fled the surface of the mineral planet Crait, Rey felt like she must have worried enough for a dozen lifetimes and had barely slept at all. The little sleep she had managed to get had occurred while she was curled up uncomfortably on a dirty stretch of floor.

She was used to struggle and uncertainty, but nothing could have prepared any of them for the reality of fleeing from the First Order with a fighting force small enough that they could all be crowded into one small freighter.

Poe’s voice was rising, and Rey felt the beginning of a headache building behind her eyes. Tensions were high and even the most even tempered of them were losing their patience.

Discussions like these had been common since they had made the jump at lightspeed away from Crait and realized that by some miracle of the Force the First Order hadn’t tracked them. Lightspeed tracking was new, and frightening. No one was certain how aggressively they were being pursued, but everyone on board knew that finding a safe place to hide was a top priority if any of them were going to survive.

There would once have been many places in the galaxy that would have welcomed them, but with Leia’s distress call from Crait going unanswered, they were no longer certain if there were any places remaining for them to go where they wouldn’t be immediately handed over to the nearest stormtrooper.

Even with Starkiller Base destroyed, the people of the galaxy had been frozen in fear of the First Order’s might since the destruction of the Hosnian system.

Rey suspected that they might have a bit longer before the First Order began to search for them in earnest than the other survivors realized. The death of Snoke and the destruction of his dreadnought, the Supremacy, would probably have thrown the First Order’s leadership into disarray.

Still, she was hesitant to mention this to the others because there was always the chance that she might be wrong. There might already be probes and roving search patrols looking for them. If that was true, then not being cautious enough could get them all killed.

That, in itself, was a good reason to keep her silence but it was not the only reason she hadn’t spoken up. Beneath that very real concern, she admitted to herself, she was also not eager to explain how she knew Snoke was dead or discuss the events that had occurred in his throne room on the Supremacy.

She sighed and rubbed the slowly healing wound on her shoulder. Defeating Snoke’s Praetorian Guards after Ben Solo had killed Snoke had been no easy task, and she knew everyone would have questions about how she had survived. Questions she wasn’t ready to answer because she didn’t really understand it herself.

Ben’s behavior was sure to draw mixed responses and she knew she didn’t fully comprehend his motivations, despite the strange bond between them.

Though Leia might have welcomed news that her son had shown some mercy or compassion, Rey was reluctant to hurt her further with the knowledge that he had once again turned his back on the opportunity to return to his family. He had refused to turn away from the dark path he was on.

The others would simply not understand why Ben had turned on his master instead of killing her. Most of them knew him only as Kylo Ren and they hated him almost as much as they feared him. It was understandable because of his position as a leader within the First Order, if nothing else, but he had also seriously wounded Finn in combat and tortured Poe for information that could lead to Luke Skywalker.

She, too, had felt that same mixture of fear and anger after being taken by him on Takodona and then enduring his invasion of her mind and watching him kill his own father on Starkiller Base.

Sadness washed through her again at the thought. Han Solo had been kind to her, and she had been deeply saddened by his death.

Rey had channeled that anger and grief, and her newly discovered connection with the Force, when she had dueled with Ben in the forest before the destruction of Starkiller Base. Somehow it had fueled her enough that she had given him a lightsaber wound that had permanently scarred his face and chest.

How could she explain to anyone else that, somehow, it had been his invasion of her mind that had unlocked the Force powers she hardly began to understand? Or that she had now also been inside his mind and felt his torn emotions?

Through a bond neither of them understood she now felt closer to him than she had ever felt to anyone and she knew his pain and his conflict as well as she knew herself. She knew that Ben Solo still lived under the hurt and rage that made up Kylo Ren and that he had saved her life, but would anyone else believe her?

That was a complicated enough problem to contemplate and she certainly wasn’t prepared to examine too closely the feelings she had felt emanating from him in the Force when she had confronted him in the Supremacy’s elevator. Feelings about his own conflict, yes, but also about her. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat. Those feelings were intense, confusing, and personal. She was definitely not speaking to anyone about that.

His conflict, at least, she had once believed she understood. She had been so certain that Ben would turn. She had seen it and felt it clearly enough on Ahch-to that she had abandoned her quest to bring Luke Skywalker back to the Resistance from his self-imposed exile and chased her vision of his future straight to Ben on the Supremacy.

So clear was her conviction, in fact, that she had been more surprised when he asked her to join him, to turn her back on her friends and let the Resistance die, than she had been when she’d reached out across a galaxy and actually touched his hand through their bond.

Rey looked around sadly at the results of his decision. So many faces were missing, those who were unfortunate enough to be on the escape pods that were destroyed before Vice Admiral Holdo had split the Supremacy into pieces by ramming it at lightspeed with a Resistance cruiser.

The remainder of them were now facing a panicked flight into an unknown future.

Even now it hurt, a physical ache in her chest, whenever she thought of his anguished face as he realized she wasn’t going to join him. The pain of loss, and the sting of guilt.

For one shining moment, she had believed that she had been right and that Ben was really ready to toss aside his allegiance to the dark side and his identity as Kylo Ren as she had seen in her vision of his future. When he had killed Snoke instead of giving in to Snoke’s order to kill her, she thought he was going to help her save the Resistance. That he would come with her when she fled and be the hope the galaxy needed.

The joy she had felt in that moment was more intense than anything she had ever felt in her life.

Even once she realized that he was not ready to come back, and that he couldn’t yet face his mother or his guilt over his own past actions, there was part of her that still wanted to take the gloved hand he offered her. If she had, she was certain she would never have felt alone again and the temptation of that had been strong.

Almost too strong to resist. She had nearly reached out her hand to take his, given in to the naked longing and desperation she had seen in his eyes.

“Please,” he had whispered, shattering her heart. Only the sick waves of guilt she felt at the thought of abandoning her friends to die had stopped her. She had seen beneath the mask of the monster she had despised, and there was something undefinable about the way she felt about the man she had discovered beneath it.

She was drawn to him, despite his choices and their disastrous consequences.

She had left him alive after the Supremacy had been destroyed, when she had woken to find him still unconscious on the floor. Partially because she felt that the Force still had a use for him despite his stubborn insistence on clinging to the darkness, and partially because she couldn’t bear the thought of killing him.

She had returned his own lightsaber to his belt and fled in Snoke’s escape pod with the broken halves of Luke Skywalker’s now useless one. It was tucked away with the Jedi texts she had stolen from Luke, hopelessly cracked down the center from the equal power of her need to leave and Ben’s desire for her to stay.

His anger after she left was something she expected and, from the stories she had heard from those who had been trapped in the Resistance base on Crait, it had been a frightening thing to behold.

She had not expected to see that anger fade once more to sorrow and regret when the Force had connected them for the last time, just before she fled the planet with the last of the Resistance survivors.

Thinking about him now brought back strong memories of how his conflicted feelings had buffeted through her as she locked eyes with him for the last time. She almost thought she could actually feel his presence again for just a brief moment. Those same feelings of rage, confusion, and surprise that he had felt as he knelt before her on Crait suddenly washed through her again before it faded away just as quickly as it came.

Those feelings had pulled at her, she wanted to help him. Closing the bond on him had been difficult, but she had tried her best to reach him and she had been needed to help save other lives.

Lives that were expecting the people at this table to lead them. Poe and Leia were used to this, but Rey was not accustomed to the demands of leadership.

She glanced at the quiet man sitting in the seat directly opposite her own. Finn, too, was listening to the current discussion without offering much insight. He looked tired and frustrated by the lack of progress. She knew he was still overwhelmed by the many changes he had also experienced in a short time.

He had gone from runaway stormtrooper to Resistance hero in only a few short days. She was grateful for his presence, since it made her feel less alone knowing he was also having to make some quick and uncomfortable adjustments.

Maybe they were all going to have to learn to make some quick adjustments, she thought.

Clearing her throat loudly to get Leia and Poe’s attention, she said quickly, “Maybe we need to think about this differently. We don’t need a place for all of us to hide. We need a place where we can land and get all of these people onto other ships. Finding a place to establish a new base that is safe may take some time, and if the First Order finds us now, they would be able to destroy everything that remains of the Resistance.”

Leia was listening intently, so Rey rushed on, “If we find a port, we can get everyone passage out to different places in the galaxy. In small groups it would be easier to blend in, and harder for the First Order to find us. Most of us have homes, families or friends, that we can go to, even if people aren’t willing to help the Resistance as a whole. Once we have a plan for the location of the next base everyone who is still willing to fight can join us there. In the meantime, they can rest and, if we are very lucky, recruit others to fight.”

Poe looked skeptical, and she understood that splitting up at this point was not the solution everyone had been hoping for, but after a moment he nodded. Rey looked around the small table to each face in turn, and they all reluctantly agreed that the plan would be their best option.

“We need to get everyone prepared,” Poe announced once the decision was made, quickly taking charge of the operation. “The faster we can start getting people passage on other ships the less likely it is that we will draw attention to ourselves. We need to choose a planet that is nearby, is busy enough that we can get enough of us passage off the planet, and where people will mind their own business.”

It looked like he was about to mention Tatooine again, but Leia’s glare stopped him.

Rey stood, intent on finding Chewie and being ready to finally get everyone off this asteroid once they had all decided on a suitable planet. It felt good to finally have a plan and she was eager to get started.

Several hours later she was watching the last small group of her friends slip into the crowd in a run-down star port on Saleucami. Her plan had worked remarkably well. Though the planet was hot and dim, its capital, Taleucema was a booming part of an established trade route. Consequently, it had a diverse population that saw plenty of travelers, so the chance of them drawing any unwanted attention was low.

Finding new clothes or cloaks for everyone to hide their resistance uniforms had been more difficult than they expected, but they had managed, and it was surprisingly easy to arrange enough transportation off the planet since there was no First Order presence this deep in the Outer Rim.

Those Resistance members who didn’t have anywhere to go were able to travel with someone who did. They were all looking out for each other, which gave Rey hope for their future.

Once the group disappeared from view, Rey turned back to Finn and Poe. “We need to get back to the Falcon. I hate leaving Leia there, even with Threepio for company and Chewie on guard.”

She had tried in vain to get one of them to stay behind with the General, too, once it had been decided that Leia would remain in the Falcon. She was safer there and they were safer without her with them. She would draw too much attention to the group. Years of service in the Rebellion and the Resistance had not changed the aura of royalty that Leia always carried and that was something even people in a place like this were sure to notice.

Both of them had refused to stay behind, however, wanting to make sure that everyone made it off the planet safely.

They made their way quickly, but cautiously, back out of the star port and down the busy streets until they had passed out of the city altogether. It was a long journey back to the Falcon since Rey and Chewie had landed it deep in a forested area far away from the crowds of Taleucema.

Frequent checks reassured them that hadn’t been followed. No one was likely to bother them out here but by the time they returned to the Falcon they were all exhausted from the journey and tension of getting everyone safely on their way.

Leia smiled when they all entered the Falcon’s main hold. “Finally, I was beginning to get worried.” She looked more tired and strained than Rey had ever seen her. Chewie was hovering close by, looking concerned, though he pretended not to be.

She had lost her husband and her brother in such a short time, and that both of those losses had come as the price of a war she was fighting against her son made the pain even more unbearable. She knew Ben had killed Han, though Rey had never mentioned it to her directly, because she had felt it in the Force. The weight of that was taking its toll.

“It’s a long walk,” Finn replied, dropping heavily into a seat at the table next to Poe. “But everything was fine. No stormtroopers, no problems.”

“Good, we can worry about what comes next after we have all had a chance to eat and get some rest. Chewie, Threepio, and I set up sleeping arrangements for everyone and we all get a bed tonight.”

Leia smiled at Finn and Poe’s exaggerated whoops of happiness, then held her finger to her lips, pointing to the bed nearby where Rose Tico still lay. She was recovering nicely from the injuries she had sustained on Crait, but she was not yet strong enough to be moved. Rose would stay on the Falcon until they set up a new base or she was recovered enough to go home.

After the stories Rey had heard, she was certain she knew which option Rose was going to choose. This girl was a fighter and devoted to the Resistance. Right now, though, she was clearly not up to fighting the First Order, since she had barely moved at the noise Finn and Poe had created.

After a hurried dinner during which everyone was too tired to talk, Rey followed Threepio to a bed that had been set up in the cargo hold. Leia was sleeping in the main bedchamber, and Chewie, Finn and Poe were in the crew chambers.

Leia seemed to sense that Rey would prefer a bit of distance, which Rey appreciated. Her nerves were still frayed after experiencing so much emotional upheaval in such a short time and she was hoping that sleep and some time alone would help her process all she had been through.

After listening to Threepio calculate their odds of returning successfully from getting everyone safely off the planet at 12,564 to 1, she gratefully closed the door behind him, dropped onto her bed, and fell asleep without even taking off her shoes.

The dream that invaded her exhausted mind almost immediately was unwelcome and confusing, but she was too tired to shake free of it. The first thing she became aware of was a presence next to her in the darkness, a weight pressing into the bed next to her.

It was familiar, angry, and radiating hurt and confusion so intensely that she felt herself sob out loud from the strength of it. She reached out her hand and bumped into something that felt solid and warm. It flinched from her touch, as though wounded or surprised, and she muttered soothingly.

She acted on pure instinct, scooting closer and wrapping her arms around the tense figure that lay next to her, trying in vain to provide comfort. She could still feel the Force pushing pain into her in sharp ragged waves.

Somewhere inside her mind she felt a vague sense of unease, as though something wasn’t right, but she was unable to place exactly what the danger was. He couldn’t hurt her in her dreams. Here she was free to imagine what could have been if he had joined her and she was no longer alone. To express desires her waking mind wasn’t prepared to acknowledge.

Her head nestled into him, her cheek sliding over his skin as she breathed in his scent. There was no danger here. She felt safe and protected, curled up next to his side. His emotions began to settle, and she slipped quickly back into a dreamless sleep with only one thought, one word that slipped from her lips like a prayer of longing, “Ben”.

He was still there when she woke up the next morning.

This was unusual, since she had never woken to find her dreams had crept into reality before, but there was absolutely no denying that she could feel his body pressed against hers and his presence in the Force was still pulsing with a strength that threatened to overwhelm her.

She lay as still as possible, eyes still closed, unable to focus on anything but the warmth of his body and the steady sound of his heartbeat. She was laying half on top of him, she realized with embarrassment. Her head was now resting on his bare chest, one arm flung ungracefully across his stomach and one leg intertwined with both of his. His arm was wrapped tightly around her back, pulling her as close as possible, his hand clutched tightly to her hip.

She knew that they touched hands on Ach-to, but it was the barest brush of fingertips. It seemed impossible that this was happening as a product of their bond, but the alternative was that he had managed to find her and sneak into her bed without detection and that made even less sense.

Snoke had claimed he was responsible for the connection of their minds, a claim she had begun to question when Ben had appeared to her again after Snoke was dead, but now there was little doubt in her mind that he wasn’t responsible for this. He was a powerful dark side force user, but Luke Skywalker was a Jedi legend and the effort of projecting even an image of himself across the galaxy had been enough to kill him.

No, Ben was right. This was…something else.

She felt him stir slightly beneath her and chanced opening her eyes for a quick peek at his face, expecting to find him sleeping. Instead he was looking at her intensely with an inscrutable expression in his impossibly dark eyes. He looked haunted and almost pained.

Her cheeks flushed, blood rushing under the skin, hot and horrible, to give away her embarrassment. She sat up quickly, pushing off him and moving toward the edge of the bed.

He didn’t move, though it had felt that he had hesitated briefly before letting her go, instead continuing to lounge with his head on her pillow. His black hair was ruffled, as if he had been running his fingers through it, and he was wearing only a pair of loose black pants suitable for sleeping. His bare chest showed clearly the scar she had given him on Takodona. It ran up his neck and across his face, narrowly missing his eye. He had other scars on his chest, arms, and hands. A lifetime of battle etched in thin ribbons across the pale tapestry of his skin.

His feet were also bare, and somehow that was worse, more intimate, than when she had turned to find him unexpectedly bare chested for the first time in a Force bond. She had been briefly captivated by his appearance despite her anger. She had experienced a similar reaction when he had removed his helmet and allowed her to see his face for the first time in the interrogation room on Starkiller Base. He seemed to have that effect on her.

The small smirk he wore told her he knew it.

Now, he was wearing even less. If this continued, she would soon find herself talking to him while he showered. It would undoubtedly amuse him to watch her discomfort if it happened.

His eyes, which had been scanning her face, watching her reaction to his unexpected presence in her bed, dropped lower to evaluate the rest of her appearance. She was uncomfortably aware that she had been sleeping in her clothes, down to the shoes, and must look like exactly what she was- a fleeing scavenger who hadn’t brushed her hair in three days. It made her feel vulnerable and resentful.

There were things she wanted to say, most of it heated and accusatory, and she could see that he was also struggling against the urge to speak.

The tense silence was broken when Finn called her name from outside the door.

“I’m coming!” Rey called quickly, standing up and moving away from the bed, away from Ben. She looked back at him, noting he was glaring at the door, his expression the same look of loathing he had worn when he called Finn a traitor in the forest on Starkiller Base.

“I have to go,” she whispered quickly. He didn’t look at her or acknowledge her words. “Ben,” she said, more firmly but still quietly, in case Finn was waiting outside the door.

He turned toward her, frowning. “I told you, I gave up that name…” he began, but she cut him off, waving her hand impatiently. He was making no attempt to be quiet and since Luke had seen Ben during their last Force connection on Ahch-To, the strength of the bond may have grown enough for Finn to now be able to hear him, too.

“Whatever this bond is between us, it doesn’t seem to be going away,” Rey hissed through clenched teeth. “We have to deal with that, somehow, but we are still on opposite sides of a war. You chose that.”

“Not much of a war,” he quipped with a nasty smirk. “There is almost nothing left of the Resistance and the First Order’s power still spreads. As for the bond between us,” he glanced pointedly at the spot on his chest where her head had been resting, “you didn’t seem to mind it last night.”

Rey felt the heat rise in her face again, and snarled, “This war is just beginning, and if I had known you were really here, last night would never have happened.”

Ben smiled bitterly. “You should have killed me when you had the chance.” His voice dropped low, took on the silky tone he always used when challenging her or daring her to defy him. “I am more your enemy than even you realize.” Then, as had always happened before when the force connection between them was disconnected, he was suddenly gone.

What, she wondered, could he possibly have meant by that?

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think Leia has made her (and my) feelings about Tattoine pretty clear and we definitely won't see out heroine alone in the desert at the end of this story! 
> 
> We begin our tale with secret bonds and unwitting cuddles, which are great things to have in a love story!


	2. The Power of the Dark Side

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You cannot spend your life worrying about the petty feelings of others. -Robert Greene

Kylo remained where he was, lounging comfortably in his overly large bed, for several minutes after Rey had disappeared. There was no denying that he was more her enemy now than he had ever been.

A quick look at his surroundings, the spacious bedroom that he was not yet quite familiar with, confirmed the change in his status that she was likely not yet aware of. These were the master’s chambers on board the new First Order flagship, the Finalizer.

The Finalizer had always been Kylo’s ship, but this room had not been his. There was a room like this on every First Order ship and they had, previously, been reserved for Snoke’s use if he ever needed to be aboard.

Now, it all belonged to him, Kylo thought.

Mere days ago, it had not even been an idea he would have contemplated. Yes, he had hated Snoke in almost every possible way, but he had been loyal.

He owed Snoke that much for giving him a place to go and helping him to forge a new identity on the dark side of the force.

Once Luke had tried to kill him, fleeing to Snoke had been his only option. There was no way he could have returned to Leia and Han after that. If Luke’s other students had not believed that Luke had tried to murder him, and that he hadn’t blown up the temple, then how could expect his parents to believe him?

So, he had taken the blame for the destruction of the temple, the death of most of Luke’s students, and for nearly killing Luke.

Kylo was certain that Luke had never told anyone why he had turned, so even now his mother believed that he had turned against Luke because he had been born with darkness in his soul. Han had died believing it.

They all thought he was a monster, as they always had.

Well, he had become one, hadn’t he? He had become Master of the Knights of Ren, Jedi Killer.

He no longer needed their love or approval. He had moved beyond it. Moved into a world where he could manipulate his own destiny and he was out of the shadow of Han Solo and Luke Skywalker.

If there was now a familiar sick feeling that arose whenever he thought of Han, and if it joined uncomfortably with the rage he felt when thinking of Luke, well that was something he could deal with.

He took a deep breath and pushed both feelings down, wrestling to control his emotions.

His impulsiveness on Crait had cost him dearly and he needed to avoid such failures in the future. There was no hiding the mistake he made confronting Luke in front of the First Order’s troops.

The Resistance had escaped, and Luke had vanished. He had been a mere projection used as a distraction.

If Kylo hadn’t been drowning in feelings of rage and betrayal he would have noticed sooner and would not now have to waste any time thinking about whether an actual army could be reformed from the few survivors who had escaped on Han Solo’s piece of junk freighter.

Standing abruptly, Kylo stalked to the window. There were more stars than could be fathomed and soon he would rule it all.

The pitiful Resistance was nothing compared to the might of the First Order and it wouldn’t be long until any hint of rebellion was snuffed out.

He had nothing to be concerned about so his new role should be easy, but it wasn’t.

Crait had been a poor start to his reign as Supreme Leader and his embarrassment at the hands of Luke was enough to deal with, but that wasn’t the problem that bothered him most.

Kylo looked over at the bed, dark eyes scanning the place where Rey had slept in his arms.

She should be there, now, a real presence sleeping draped across his bed in luxury and not just a trick of the Force that vanished back to whatever hole the Resistance was hiding in.

She had looked tired, hungry, and dirty.

Foolish woman, he thought, languishing with filth when she could have been here, instead. Clothed, fed, wrapped in power and his protection.

She had to have known that was what he was offering her. Power, yes, and a place beside him to rule. But beyond that he wanted her here- with him, beside him, beneath him.

His fists clenched and he stalked away, grabbing clothes and pulling them on roughly, now impatient to get the hell out of here and away from a room that somehow still carried echoes of her presence.

Several stormtroopers jumped out the way when he stormed out of his chambers and headed for the bridge. He needed to find Hux and get the First Order’s considerable resources focused on finding her before she got herself killed.

Hux wasn’t going to be happy about taking orders but he also hadn’t shown it since Kylo had slammed him into the wall of the command shuttle on Crait.

His hatred radiated more strongly every day that passed but he was obedient, for now. He needed to be watched closely, Kylo knew, because he wouldn’t hesitate to strike if he sensed an opportunity.

Everyone on the bridge tensed visibly when Kylo stalked into the room. They were all used to his presence but his sudden change in status and recent irritability made them all nervous.

Everyone’s eyes were suddenly glued to their screens, and they studiously avoided looking in his direction. They were hoping desperately to avoid catching his attention.

Kylo advanced on Hux, who was standing in front of the large bridge window and watching him with barely restrained venom in his eyes. He was impeccably dressed, as always, not a wrinkle or a stray red hair to be seen.

“Supreme Leader,” Hux nodded a greeting when Kylo reached his side but his voice was flat and without emotion. “You should bring the Knights of Ren back from their missions. It is unsafe for a man in your position to walk around…unprotected.”

Kylo knew Hux hadn’t been fooled by his claim that Rey had killed Snoke and the guards alone. Hux wanted to make sure that he knew it.

Acknowledgment passed between them, the tension clearly palpable. “I am sure they would be happy to help eliminate any threats to my authority, General,” Kylo’s voice was quiet, but the threat they implied was clear.

How much did Hux know about his motivations? Did he think Kylo had killed Snoke for power or had he guessed that it was to protect Rey?

This put him in an uncomfortable position. If he sent stormtroopers after Rey, he would be putting his new position, or her life, in danger.

Hux had their loyalty, since Kylo’s previous role as Snoke’s apprentice had not put him as part of the First Order’s army. Hux could easily have Rey taken away and used as leverage.

“Updates, General Hux?” Kylo asked abruptly.

“The losses of Starkiller Base and the Supremacy in such a short time have upset our plans. We need more resources if there is to be any hope of moving forward on schedule.”

“Resources,” Kylo muttered. “Explain to me exactly what we need,” he said, causing Hux’s disgust to flash briefly across his face.

Kylo considered killing him for that alone, but unfortunately, he still needed Hux’s military experience.

He tried to listen and understand all of the explanation that Hux was giving him, but wasn’t sure it was all sinking in. This was not really his area of expertise.

Snoke had done all of the planning and manipulation. Kylo had been an enforcer, operating outside the area of the First Order’s military and focusing on specialty missions.

Looking for Luke had been one of those, but there had been many others, such as searching for Sith artifacts or Jedi relics. Always keeping an eye out for any evidence of a reemerging Jedi threat.

These missions were how he had discovered Darth Vader’s helmet and why he recognized Anakin Skywalker’s lightsaber when it appeared suddenly on Starkiller Base in the possession of Rey and that stormtrooper traitor, FN-2187. 

He was honed to the presence and the history of such items.

And yet, he thought, it had gone to her in the forest, instead of him. The legacy of his own bloodline had betrayed him, even then.

Well, now he had a different kind of family legacy to fulfill, one that he had given himself over to entirely.

Fixing Darth Vader’s mistake and returning a sense of order to a Galaxy out of control thanks to the weakness of the Republic.

Hux’s report told him he needed more troops and more ships, to replace what had been lost. He would have to figure out a way to get both.

An hour later, after listening to Hux’s entire exhaustive rundown of the First Order’s needs if they intended to remain on schedule with expanding their areas of control, Kylo left the bridge without mentioning Rey or the Resistance as he had originally planned.

He couldn’t chance Hux being the one to find Rey, but if the war continued and she was still out there with the Resistance she could be killed.

He thought about sending the Knights, but he couldn’t leave things now to go with them and he would never trust them not to hurt her. Without a restraining hand in control, they were all brutal and would be likely to bring her home dead or worse.

Kylo looked up and realized he had circled back around to his new chambers without being aware of the journey.

He had intended to eat but wasn’t going to retrace his steps back to the small officer’s lounge where he was accustomed to picking up his food.

He sighed and walked to a small box located near the door. He pushed a button and waited for the voice on the other end to answer. When it did, he barked curtly that he wanted breakfast brought to his chamber immediately.

He began to pace restlessly between his bed and the large window. He was distracted and it was dangerous. Worrying about how to get Rey back to him could easily end up getting him killed if he weren’t careful.

There had been rumblings of discontent in the First Order since Snoke’s death, and Hux would happy to help them grow. Kylo knew he needed to make sure Snoke’s authority transferred to him as smoothly as possible.

If he wanted to keep his newfound power and his life, he would need to pay close attention to his surroundings and everyone within the First Order.

Perhaps Hux was right, and he should bring the Knights of Ren back from their missions until he had firmer control of the First Order leadership. They were an intimidating presence that could keep everyone in line while Kylo did some restructuring.

Removing some of Hux’s power would make this place safer, both for him and for Rey once he found her.

The sooner everything was under control with the First Order’s management the sooner he could go and bring her back. Redistributing authority away from Hux would also let him keep an eye on the First Order forces to make sure that they didn’t get too close to Rey.

He would need to do so without arousing too much suspicion or attention from Hux. Until she was safely with him, it was important that he not draw Hux’s attention to her. 

Restructuring was a good first step in cementing his power, but he was also going to need to find a way to get the resources Hux had insisted they needed.

He was certain these early days of his leadership were crucial. It was vital that he appeared competent in his new role, and Hux would be quick to point out any failures.

Kylo stopped pacing when there was a beep coming from the direction of the chamber door. Walking over quickly, he opened the door and found a small woman carrying a tray with his breakfast.

She looked terrified as loomed over her and ran out as soon as she had deposited his food on the nearest table. Kylo looked at it suspiciously, wondering briefly if Hux would be bold enough to try and poison him, but quickly dismissed the idea.

Hux undoubtedly had enough ambition, but he wasn’t reckless enough to rush into a plan that could get him killed if it failed.

Kylo ate quickly, barely tasting his food. First Order food was serviceable, and certainly what he got was better than what the common workers got, but he had little patience for such simple pleasures.

The dark side gave much in power but drowned out the ability to enjoy small things like eating. Almost everything for him was numb.

He could feel anger, sadness, frustration, but happiness slipped further away as more time passed. He felt it less often and with less intensity as time passed.

His eyes roamed his new chamber as he ate. There was no such thing as true luxury on a Star Destroyer, but his chamber was now the closest anyone could get.

It was spacious, had a large bed and several tables and comfortable seating areas.

Like every other ship, it was cold. The transperisteel at the windows was just never enough to keep any warmth in, but it was easy to forget about that once you got used to it.

He had very few personal items. He had fled from Luke’s temple with nothing and had seen little point in acquiring much since then.

After he finished eating, Kylo tossed his fork down on the tray. He walked across the room to evaluate the only remaining tie he had to his family.

This was the one thing he owned that did matter to him. He stopped in front of his grandfather’s helmet, settled carefully on the pedestal that he had ordered to be moved from his old chambers to his new ones.

Perhaps, now that Snoke was dead, he would finally be able to connect with Vader’s spirit. He had tried unsuccessfully ever since he had run to Snoke and first discovered who his grandfather actually was, but Vader had never answered him.

He now desperately needed guidance on keeping his new position secure and finding his scavenger girl before she got herself killed.

Who would be better able to provide that guidance than Darth Vader? He had helped Palpatine maintain an iron grip in the Empire for decades and spent that time tracking down what remained of the elusive Jedi order.

Stripping off his gloves and his boots, he settled down to meditate, facing the warped representation of Vader’s dark side legacy.

He took a deep breath, followed by another. His body relaxed as he focused on pushing aside his always turbulent feelings to produce an artificial inner calm.

He had years of practice at stilling his mind, emptying himself of all noticeable thought and emotion. Luke had insisted on daily hours of mediation, even when he had been just a boy and was first brought to what would eventually become Luke’s training temple.

He had always hated it, but it had become useful over the years, when he needed to harness some aspect of the Force that required great concentration. This time, though, his thoughts resisted his control.

It was all her fault that things in his life were now so difficult, he thought.

The thought, and the image of her, popped into his head, making him scowl in frustration at the unbidden interruption. He tried to brush the thought aside, to focus on calm and the possibility of connecting with Vader’s spirit, but he wasn’t able to drive her image out of his mind.

His feelings bubbled to the surface with a torrent of thoughts and memories.

It was frustrating. He had felt increasingly unbalanced since the moment she had come into his life. She had brought with her feelings that he thought were lost forever.

After he had killed Snoke and Rey had fought with him to destroy the Praetorian Guards he had been completely convinced he would have the power to rule the galaxy with a new and powerful empress by his side.

Hadn’t he seen her parents and known the pain she would feel upon learning that she was truly alone? He knew what that felt like and it was that feeling of loss and betrayal that had driven him to the darkness.

It should have done the same to her. She should have joined him, and he couldn’t understand why she hadn’t.

He knew she had wanted to. He had felt her longing in the Force.

When she had raised her hand toward him, he had believed she was going to take hold of his own and that his choices in the throne room would have given him both the galaxy and the only person in it who mattered to him.

He had allowed himself to be fooled into thinking that she had come because she cared about him. That when she had placed him in the position of killing her, or turning his back on everything he had sworn loyalty to by killing Snoke to save her, that it had been done because she had felt the same feelings he had felt when they touched hands.

He had wanted her, everything about her and in every way, since he had first seen her.

Not on Takodona, as she believed, but for years before that.

He had seen her in visions.

Just quick glimpses in the oddest places. He had seen her the first time while he and the Knights of Ren were engaged in combat with the locals on some hellhole planet in the Outer Rim.

It had been raining, and the air was full of the sounds of dying men screaming. There had been no conceivable reason for her to be there, but he had only taken a few steps toward her before she disappeared.

She had clearly seen him, and she was obviously terrified, but none of the Knights had been able to see her.

He had seen her again in the forest on Starkiller Base, months before he would find himself fighting her, and being wounded by her, in nearly the same spot.

She had been stumbling through the trees, looking lost and frightened. He had chased after her, igniting his lightsaber, determined to find out who she was and why she kept appearing, but again she had vanished.

When he had finally found her on Takodona he had been amazed. She had information he needed, that was true, but he had lost all interest in the droid the moment he had seen her anyway.

She had tried to kill him for the first, but not the last, time before he had knocked her out and carried her onto his command shuttle. Now that he had her, he wasn’t letting go of her.

The stormtroopers could have carried her, but he had no desire to entrust her care to them. They were often rough with prisoners.

Something had been there even before he had tried to extract the map to Luke Skywalker from her, but the moment he had touched her mind and felt her presence in his own everything inside him had changed.

A feeling of protectiveness and possessiveness had erupted that had been unable to shake.

He had offered to teach her before she escaped Starkiller Base but thought he had lost her for good when she had slashed his face with his grandfather’s lightsaber and left him alone and in pain on the forest floor.

He should have felt ashamed that she beat him, even though he had been already wounded from a bowcaster blast that nearly killed him, but he strangely felt no shame or resentment toward her. 

He had been wounded and distracted by a desire to convince her to stay which had cost him dearly, but the sheer magnitude of her power and the ferocity of her presence in the Force had been impressive.

Her unexpected appearance on his ship when the Force first connected them had been a welcome surprise. He has soon learned that she couldn’t be manipulated into bringing him Luke but by then even Luke was a secondary consideration in Kylo’s mind.

He wanted her back more than he wanted to kill his uncle and destroy the Jedi. He didn’t understand how they were connected, but the Force kept bringing her to him anyway.

She hadn’t shared his enthusiasm for the situation. She hated him, which had felt like a nearly insurmountable problem. She had even called him a monster, and it had bothered him to hear it from her, though he knew it to be true.

He needed her to understand what happened and why he made the choices that had shaped him into Kylo Ren. She had seen inside his mind; would she believe what Luke had tried to do to him?

No one else ever had, but somehow, he knew she would. Getting her to stop hating him was the first step in bringing her back to him, but he had fallen into her power just as much as she had fallen into his.

He believed her when she had said he wasn’t alone, that it wasn’t too late to have a connection with someone. He knew he could teach her what he had learned and help her leave the pain of her past behind her.

Through doing so, she would embrace her darkness and there would be nothing left to stand between them.

Instead she had used him as everyone else had done, for his strength, for his power.

Once he had killed Snoke for her she had wanted to run back to the Resistance. She had asked him to save her friends, the people she really cared about.

He had betrayed Snoke for her, but she was not willing to do the same.

After she had torn Luke’s lightsaber from his hand, he had tried so hard to keep her with him that they had eventually torn it in two, just as the Resistance had done with the Supremacy.

She had left him again.

His rage had been beyond anything he had ever known. Not even Luke’s betrayal had cut so deep. In his pain, he lashed out and had wanted to destroy everything she loved. Only Luke’s interference had prevented that.

The last Force connection between them had calmed him some. He had seen the longing and the disappointment in her eyes, felt the conflict in her through the Force.

She tried to hide it, but there was nothing that they could hide from each other. She had left, but perhaps she wasn’t beyond his reach. He now had the galaxy and the considerable power that the dark side provided.

Maybe it wasn’t too late to get her to join him, after all.

_Is that really what you want? To share all the power of the dark side with some scavenger?_

Kylo felt his whole body jerk at the booming voice inside his mind. Abandoning any pretense at meditation he jumped to his feet, heart pounding and breath frozen in his chest.

He yanked the lightsaber from his hip and ignited it. Red sparks flew angrily as he scanned the room for danger. He couldn’t believe it was happening again, that Snoke’s voice was inside his head.

It had always been there, for as long as he could remember, but it should be gone now. He had thought it _was_ gone, until yesterday.

Finding nothing, he turned the lightsaber off and dropped heavily into the nearest chair.

He had heard it yesterday for the first time since he used the Force and Anakin’s lightsaber to cut Snoke in half.

It had been a quick and sudden accusation of disloyalty when he was arranging for the movement of his personal items into the master’s chambers of the Finalizer.

After a brief moment of pure and devastating panic he had tried to convince himself that it wasn’t real. That it was just an echo that his mind had produced since he was so accustomed to Snoke’s voice in his head.

But he knew that it wasn’t, he could feel the familiar sensation of another presence writhing like snakes inside his mind. The voice had come and gone quickly, but the presence remained.

The effect had been devastating. His worst fears were realized, he would never be free of whatever hold Snoke had on him. He wasn't strong enough to stop it.

Last night had proved that. He had been sat in bed, hands clutching his hair, trying in vain to close off his mind, for hours.

He had lost track of how long he had been there by the time Rey had appeared. He had been surprised when he had felt her suddenly next to him, her presence in the Force appearing brighter and more intense than ever.

He quickly realized she was sleeping, and not trying to shield her emotions from him. She had sobbed out loud when she had sensed his presence, though he was unsure if it had been from his ragged emotions or unknown feelings of her own.

He had flinched away from her when she had reached out and touched him, then frozen as she had slid across his bed to wrap her arms around him.

He had expected her to disappear as quickly as she had come, but she had settled into his side and, as Snoke’s presence drained away, had slowly relaxed. He had been grateful, but fearful of what she might do if she woke and found them together in bed.

Then she had whispered his name in her sleep.

Gratitude quickly shifted to something more primal and he had never wanted anything as much as he had wanted to pull her into him and crush her lips to his own, but it wasn’t time yet. If he had woken her, if he pushed her too quickly, she would have retreated from him again.

So, he had lain beside her all night, running his hands through his hair in frustration as she pushed herself ever closer. She had made her way half on top of him before he sensed her finally begin to wake.

Her reaction had been more embarrassed than angry, which he found undeniably arousing. She was as beautiful and defiant now as she had ever been.

It stirred desires in him that she wasn't prepared for.

She was innocent and determined to pretend she wasn’t just attracted to him as he was to her, even as her eyes had roamed freely over his body and her cheeks had turned pink with heat and desire.

Maybe the bond was the key to bringing her to him without putting either of them in danger. He just had to show her that she belonged with him instead of with the pitiful Resistance.

She had darkness inside her, all he needed to do was coax it out of her.

He was going to have her. No matter how long it took or what he had to do, she was going to rule beside him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we see the return of darker powers and the hint of an outside evil. I won't tell you what it is, but I will tell you that it isn't Palpatine!
> 
> Kylo has such high hopes and ambitions about his relationship with Rey but he was never any good at manipulation. He wears his heart on his sleeve like the broken hero we all know he is.


	3. Secrets Between Us

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into a friend. -MLK

Rey was beginning to get frustrated. Days had passed since they had landed on this miserable planet and they were really no closer to finding a new permanent base than they had been the first day.

Leia had made a short list of possibilities, all far enough from trade routes or heavily occupied systems to help them avoid detection, but close enough to targets that they would still be able to keep up with the demand for fuel as missions began.

While she was relieved that there seemed to be some options available, Leia wanted all of them monitored for several weeks to ensure that whichever one was chosen was not being watched or used at all by the First Order.

It was the safest strategy, but one that left them all feeling restless and edgy. Rey was avoiding Poe at all costs since his bossy nature got on her nerves even when she wasn’t tense and snappish.

He was nice enough, but she wasn’t used to being told what to do. Finn had already figured out her strategy and laughed under his breath whenever Poe entered a room just for Rey to find an excuse to walk out of it.

Rey knew Finn genuinely liked both of them, so she didn’t begrudge him his friendship with Poe, but she knew that her personality was too independent and headstrong to ever feel the same about a man who thrived on being in charge of everyone else.

Fortunately, Rose was now feeling better and roaming aimlessly around the Falcon, though they kept her bed in the common area so that they could keep an eye on her in case of any setbacks.

Rey liked her immediately. She was innately kind but fiercely determined. She explained to Rey about the First Order’s mistreatment of her planet and the recent death of her sister in an ill-fated bombing run.

They had all been through so much already and lost so many loved ones. It was hard to imagine that this war was only just beginning.

Rey found herself often seeking out Rose’s company to combat the intense boredom and was currently curled up in one corner of Rose’s bed, laughing at Rose’s description of Finn’s panic as they fled Canto Bight clinging to the back of a rampaging fathier, when Finn walked into the room.

He was distracted and paused only long enough to ask if they had seen Leia, before he walked out again. Rey watched Rose’s eyes follow him across the room until he was out of eyesight. It wasn’t the first time Rey had noticed Rose looking at Finn when she thought he wouldn’t notice. She looked hurt but was trying not to show it.

“Wanna talk about it?” Rey asked knowingly.

Rose glanced at her quickly and blushed. “Is it that noticeable?” Rose leaned forward to peak around into the hallway, checking to make sure Finn was out of earshot. “I don’t want anyone to know. Especially Finn. It’s so humiliating!”

Rey’s brows furrowed with concern as tears suddenly filled her new friend’s eyes.

“He’s a Resistance hero! I should have known he wouldn’t be interested in me.”

“You’re a Resistance hero, too,” Rey began, but Rose interrupted, surprising Rey with her next words.

“I kissed him on Crait, after I saved him from ramming that death star cannon,” she blurted out. “I shouldn’t have. Kissed him, I mean. He was obviously more interested in you and talked about you the whole time we were on our mission to Canto Bight, and now he barely looks at me.”

Rey sat back, mind whirling and full of questions. “Wait, what do you mean he is interested in me? Finn isn’t interested in me. We’re just friends. We fled from Jakuu together after he left the First Order, and he helped save me from Starkiller Base, but nothing like that ever happened between us.”

Rose looked skeptical, but hopeful. “I thought at first that he just liked you so much because you were the first person he really got to know after he escaped the First Order, but he looks at you like you are one of the best things in his life.”

Rey thought about it for a moment. She felt similarly about Finn, an intense bond existed between them. He had helped her and been there for her since she had finally left Jakuu.

_ Was _ this feeling between them more than friendship?

Her memory flashed back through the time she had known Finn, running through the sand in the desert, escaping rathtars and gangsters with Han Solo, sneaking through the halls of Starkiller Base.

These memories made her feel pleasant and comfortable, as did Finn’s presence in her life. It was a nice feeling but was it friendship or something more?

Those memories were suddenly replaced by a new series of memories: the hiss of a helmet being opened for the first time to reveal a pair of stormy eyes so dark they were nearly black, a voice that whispered in her ear that she shouldn’t be afraid and she wasn’t alone, a hand reaching out impossibly across a galaxy, a presence in her mind that was simultaneously home and a thrilling adventure.

She pushed the images away, unsure what to do with them.

“I think maybe Finn just needs something to compare it to. Give it time,” she said reaching for Rose’s hand. “Give  _ him  _ time. He had to do a lot of adjusting since he left the First Order, so don’t just give up on him.”

Rose smiled, though she looked far from certain. “I am so glad that you’re here. My sister would really have liked you, Rey.”

“If she was anything like you, I am sure I would have liked her, too.”

Rose was quiet for a moment, and Rey noticed her eyelids drooping.

She laughed, “Alright, you need a nap. I am going to get out of here and let you sleep. It’s my turn to do patrols, anyway.”

Rose looked like she wanted to object but was too tired to try. She was asleep before her head hit the pillow. Rey pulled the rough blanket up over Rose’s shoulders and slipped off the bed without waking her new friend.

After saying a quick goodbye to the others, she slipped out the door of the Falcon and into the trees. They did several patrols a day, just to make sure that no one had discovered their location.

They had already made a few runs into the city for food or other supplies and each time increased the chance of someone getting curious enough to follow them.

She should have been glad to get out of the Falcon and get some time alone. After spending so much time living an isolated life on Jakku, it was sometimes difficult to be surrounded by noise and people all the time.

Instead, she wandered through the trees and was struck by an intense feeling of loneliness.

Everyone in the Falcon was kind to her but keeping secrets about what had happened aboard the Supremacy, keeping secrets from Leia about her son, was hard. It kept her from being able to truly relax no matter how much she enjoyed their company.

She knew she could never speak to Rose about Ben the way that Rose had confided in her about Finn.

She wished she had _ someone _ to confide in, someone who understood everything that she had been through.

The Force rushed in around her suddenly, bringing with it a presence that alerted her she was no longer alone among the trees.

She rolled her eyes, accustomed now to his inconveniently timed appearances. She wanted to confide in someone about him, not talk to him directly.

He was standing a few feet away from her, looking at her intensely. He was at least fully clothed this time. He was dressed in his usual black, cloak swirling in the slight breeze.

His lightsaber was resting peacefully against his hip, but she felt suddenly vulnerable realizing that all she had was her blaster. She wished that Luke’s saber wasn’t sitting broken and useless in a drawer on board the Falcon.

“You’re awake this time,” he said, eyes skimming over her appearance and making her grateful she looked cleaner than last time and had brushed her hair that morning.

She had restored it to its buns, to keep it off her neck in this heat, and had a fleeting thought that she hoped he liked it in her usual style.

“I wondered if we were only going to be connected now when you were sleeping.”

He took a step forward and she held her ground, refusing to retreat from him.

“We shouldn’t be connected at all,” she retorted. “Not until you are ready to leave the First Order and come home to Leia.”

He flinched at the sound of his mother’s name but took several more steps until he was standing so close that they were almost touching. She had to tip her head back to look at his face.

She couldn’t hold his gaze, not when he was looking at her like this, his eyes hot and possessive. Her eyes focused on his mouth, and she felt her stomach flip as the urge to press her lips to his pushed its way into her mind.

His eyes darkened and she knew he had sensed her thoughts. She could feel herself blushing and hated it. He was sure to notice that, too, and he enjoyed knowing he made her uncomfortable.

“Maybe  _ you _ should come back to  _ me _ ,” he said silkily, “before you get yourself killed. I can’t protect you out there, wherever you are.”

“You know I can’t do that, Ben. The First Order hurts so many people. You can’t expect me to stand by and do nothing while that happens.” She looked up, hoping to find understanding in his eyes but he didn’t seem to be affected at all.

“The Jedi hurt people and so did the Republic. I am helping to bring a new, better order. It doesn’t have to make you my enemy, Rey.”

“I don’t want to be your enemy,” she retorted. “The First Order is my enemy, but you don’t have to be. You have choices.”

“So do you,” he said. “I can offer you so much.”

She shook her head, frustrated that he still didn’t understand. She turned away to compose her thoughts, but when she turned back, he was gone.

She barely resisted the urge to stomp her foot in frustration. If he ever just listened to anything she said, then he would be here with her, now, helping them to fight the First Order.

Instead he was off doing whatever horrible thing the First Order was planning next. It was exhausting to think about how ridiculous and  _ stubborn _ he was being.

She finished the rest of her patrol quickly, not exactly eager to get back to the Falcon and face everyone when she was still so flustered, but not prepared to stay out alone where Ben could show back up at any moment.

By the time she came in everyone else was sitting down at the table eating dinner. Rey wasn’t hungry but the thought of turning down food still didn’t seem right to her.

Food had always been scarce on Jakku and if she had learned one thing it was that when you had the opportunity to eat, you took it.

Finn tossed her a thick slice of what passed for bread on this planet as she sat down next to Rose, and she sniffed it.

It still smelled terrible, but she pulled off a chunk and popped it into her mouth, trying her best to swallow without chewing or tasting it.

“We should have the probes back from all the planets that might be able to support a new base within the next few weeks,” Leia was saying. “Once we have a location, we can move there and begin to plan our next move.”

Poe nodded. He was pushing the food on plate around absently, not really eating much. “I hate this waiting,” he blurted out suddenly, pushing his plate away and moving restlessly away from the table. “Who knows how much damage the First Order is doing while we hide here and wait until we can gather more forces.”

Everyone sat in uncomfortable silence for a few moments. They knew they had no choice, but they also knew he was right. The longer there was no Resistance, the more quickly the First Order’s control would spread.

Leia sighed, “The reports I have gotten from my sources throughout the galaxy indicate that the First Order is currently working to repair the damage that we caused them when we destroyed Starkiller Base and the Supremacy. Snoke was killed when the _ Supremacy _ was destroyed.”

She continued quickly before the others could do more than begin to register the full implications of what she had said. Rey shifted uncomfortably but said nothing.

"That does not mean, as we may have hoped,” Leia continued, “that the First Order has become less dangerous, despite their temporary distraction. They have a new Supreme Leader.”

Leia closed her eyes and Rey felt the intensity of her pain radiating in sickly waves through the Force. She opened her eyes and looked around unflinchingly at each of their faces, as though bracing herself for what she had to say next.

Rey knew what she was going to say, but she didn’t want to believe it.

“Kylo Ren has taken Snoke’s place at the head of the First Order.” 

Rey’s bread slipped unnoticed from her fingers. She knew that he had been Snoke’s apprentice in the Force, but surely there was someone else, anyone else, who would have been next in line once Snoke was dead?

He had asked her to join him and start a new order, but she hadn’t thought he had the authority to actually do it.

“Ben is…” she coughed quickly, hoping no one noticed her slip. “Ren is the new Supreme Leader? Are they sure?”

Leia nodded. If she noticed Rey’s mistake, she didn’t acknowledge it.

Rey’s emotions were swirling, and she couldn’t focus on anything else they said for the rest of dinner. That was what he had meant, she realized, about being more her enemy than she knew.

He didn’t just work for the First Order; he  _ was _ the First Order.

She thought back to the moment in the throne room, when she had woken to find him unconscious on the floor.

She could have killed him, and she knew that almost every person at the table with her would have said that she  _ should _ have killed him when she had the chance.

She looked sadly at Leia, maybe even all of them.

Rey still couldn’t bring herself to believe that. She shared so much of his mind, his feelings. There was light in Ben Solo, and she wasn’t going to give up on helping him find it.

When dinner was over, she pulled out one thick volume of the ancient Jedi texts that she had stolen from Luke on Ahch-to and began to retreat to the solitude of her bedroom. She needed to focus her mind on something else besides her churning emotions.

Rose was still sitting next to Finn at the table, talking to him in hushed tones. Rey shot her an encouraging smile as she left them alone.

Once she was alone, she settled into her bed and began to flip aimlessly through the book’s pages.

It was written in what appeared to be an ancient form of writing she was unfamiliar with. Maybe even several of them, since each section looked to be done in different handwriting.

Not a single word was written in any language she could make sense of.

“I could help you with that, you know.”

She had been so engrossed in the book she hadn’t felt him this time. Rey yelped and jumped so hard she fell sideways off the bed. When her head popped back over the side, she found Ben standing on the other side, watching her with a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.

She realized she had never seen him truly smile. She wondered if he ever did and what it would be like.

“Ben! You scared me,” she said reproachfully. He raised an eyebrow, but he didn’t look at all sorry.

She plopped back down on the bed, laying the book in her lap. “You can help me read this?”

“I could,” he repeated, sitting down next to her and picking the book up off her lap.

His fingers brushed against her thigh and she shifted, suddenly uncomfortable and acutely aware of his proximity.

He smirked and she blushed again. He knew what he was doing, she thought resentfully. He was doing it on purpose.

She watched as he thumbed through the pages, scanning the lines of indecipherable text.

His hands were large and scarred. Some were large but most of them were small and looked like burns.

His saber she realized, putting out that chaotic energy. He probably funneled the pain of that into his anger when he was in combat.

Her heart was sad for him, but she had seen him in combat and his ferocity and power always left her breathless.

“But I won’t,” he said, pulling her attention back to his face. He was looking down at her, eyes roving over her face.

“You can bring them to me, though, on the Finalizer. I would be happy to help you here, with this and any other training you wanted. I told you once that you needed a teacher, you still do. Luke was as useless as I knew he would be.”

She stood up quickly, desperate to put some space between them.

He didn’t follow, just sat there, waiting. He looked so strange, sitting on her small bed with its rough blankets, crammed into the corner of a storage room.

His presence overwhelmed her space and made it hard for her to think. She could feel him, through the bond they shared that seemed to grow stronger with every passing day.

His desire for her by his side was palpable and intoxicating.

She pushed that aside in her mind. There were things they needed to deal with.

She made herself look into his eyes; she wanted to see his reaction to what she was about to say. 

“Leia told me,” her voice was calm and even, though her heart was pounding and her stomach swimming with sickness.

He didn’t move, not even a nod to indicate that he understood her. His eyes remained locked on hers, but she couldn’t read his expression.

“She told me that you took Snoke’s place as Supreme Leader…”

He tilted his head to one side. He was watching her reaction, she realized. Waiting to see what she would do.

“Ben, how could you? Have them stand down, stop this madness!”

“I am doing what I need to do,” he said, in that firm voice he used when had made her confess the truth about her parents. It didn’t invite argument. “I am going to bring real peace to the galaxy.”

He stood up, took a few steps in her direction. “I am going to make it safe and put an end to all of this fighting and the corruption that existed under the New Republic. That  _ is  _ bringing an end to the madness.”

She opened her mouth to respond, to tell him how wrong he was, but before she could he had crossed the distance between them, and she was peering up into his eyes again.

Her eyes flicked down to his lips as he murmured softly, “There is going to be a place for you to rule beside me when you finally decide to join me, Rey.”

Her breath hitched in her chest and her heart was pounding so loud she knew he could hear it. It was wrong, she knew it was, and she didn’t want the power he was offering, but she was still tempted.

If she joined him, she would never be alone again.

He bent down, skimmed his lips across a cheek so softly she wasn’t sure she had really felt it, and whispered into her ear. “You could have everything. I would give you power, but so much more than that. You wouldn’t have to be alone, not anymore.”

She gasped as he flooded her mind with images through the Force bond. She could feel his emotions, the desperation and the longing, as visions of his desires passed through her mind.

She was standing next to him, wearing a fitted, floor length black robe, with her hand held firmly in his much larger one. 

He was introducing her to a stiff red-haired man that was obviously a First Order officer. “Your new Empress, Hux, inform the troops that her orders are of the same importance as any that I might give.”

Hux sneered and Rey’s reached for the lightsaber on her hip. It ignited in a burst of fiery, surprising red but before she could strike, Kylo lashed out through the Force.

He lifted Hux aggressively by the throat until only the tips of his toes dragged on the floor. “Yes, Supreme Leader,” Hux choked out, “anything for the new empress.”

The scene shifted, the walls evaporating like gray smoke, and she was in a large bedroom.

She turned and found Ben behind her, stripped to the waist and watching her with dark eyes that were on fire within.

He crossed the distance between them in two large strides and lifted her in his arms, crushing her mouth with his own. She welcomed it, pushing her fingers into his hair and pulling him closer as he carried to the bed and laid her down upon it.

She drifted through it like water as the scene changed again. Kylo was sitting on a throne surrounded by First Order Officers.

She smiled and walked forward without hesitation. She know she would be welcome.

The officers bowed as she walked to Kylo and settled contentedly into his lap, curling around him like a contented kitten. His hand was resting on her hip and her head tucked into his shoulder.

“Continue, General,” he growled, “and don’t look at my wife like that again.”

She looked up into his eyes and was suddenly standing on an unfamiliar planet. Everything was lush and green and smelled so sweet. There were men in the distance, dressed in black and wearing frightening looking helmets.

She had seen them before, she knew, in a different vision. Then they had scared her, here they were watching and keeping her safe.

Still, something felt wrong, or perhaps simply different. She looked down and discovered her belly large and swollen under a softer, thinner black robe.

Ben was kneeling in front of her, his head pressed to her stomach. “Do you think the baby is going to like us?” he asked.

She laughed, “Our little Prince, of course he will.”

“Mama!” Rey turned at the sound of a small voice.

A small boy, maybe three years old, was running toward her down the hallway of a First Order ship, followed closely by a harassed looking woman wearing a black uniform.

“My apologies, Empress, the prince wanted to say goodnight.”

Rey bent down, picking up her son and pressing a kiss to the top of his head. He had silky black curls, just like his father.

She inhaled the sweet scent of him and turned to find Ben had walked up behind her. He wrapped his arms around both her and the child she carried.

He looked her over quickly, concern on his face. “You shouldn’t be lifting him. The doctors said no lifting until after the new baby comes, remember?”

Rey could feel it suddenly, a presence in the Force she hadn’t noticed a moment before. “It’s a girl this time,” she murmured.

She was jerked back to the present, arms and womb empty. Kylo was still standing in front of her, looking into her eyes, which were now misted with tears.

“I…I didn’t…I can’t”, she stammered. Her hands were on his chest, and she balled them into fists before pushing him back, shoving him away from her.

“Is that real?” she demanded. “That’s really what you want? What you think of when you imagine our future? If we had one together?”

He lifted his eyebrows at her incredulous tone.

“You had to know that? I offered you my hand, offered you the galaxy. My power was only the beginning of what I wanted to give you. That’s the only thing I have been able to imagine since the first time I saw you. You looked so frightened of me, like everyone else has been my whole life. But with you… Rey, with you it mattered. I didn’t want you to fear me, to hate me.”

He took a deep shuddering breath. “I want you to join me, Rey. Leave all this about the Jedi and the Resistance behind you and come to me.”

She turned and stomped a short distance away, tears streaming freely now down her cheeks. “I can’t do that. You know I can’t have a life of happiness and children,” voice broke on a small sob, “while other people suffer.” She fluttered her hands helplessly.

The longing she felt threatened to overwhelm her.

“For love of the Force, Ben, you want children? With me?” She wanted children, wanted to give them everything she had missed out on as a struggling orphan on Jakku, but she had given that dream up because she thought she would never be able to provide for them.

Now, he was offering her this. Kids who would have loving parents and a lifetime of luxury.

All she had to do was betray everything she believed in.

Damn him, she thought viciously.

He didn’t answer and she turned away again, shoulders shaking as she fought to push back her tears.

She felt him come up behind her and one large hand landed on her shoulder. He spun her around and pulled her in close, holding her tight to his chest while she cried.

“Do you think any of them would do the same for you?” he asked quietly, and she knew she referred to the Resistance she was trying so hard to protect. “That they would give up any  _ one _ of the things I can give you?”

He pushed her face up, forcing her to meet his eyes. There was compassion there, but no compromise.

“They wouldn’t” he said firmly. “You know that as well as I do. After what your parents did, after what Luke tried to do to me, you  _ know  _ that people only hurt you.”

Rey shook her head helplessly, thinking of Leia and the others and their selflessness. “Some people hurt you, Ben. Sometimes even good people who make bad choices, but that doesn’t mean I can just turn my back on them.”

Now it was his turn to be frustrated. He let her go and stepped back, pushing his fingers through his hair roughly, as he always did when he was trying to control his emotions.

“How can you believe that? Even you used me for what you thought I could give you.”

He ignored her hiss of indignation and continued, “That is just how people are, you have to accept it and do what is best for you.”

“I used you?” she repeated, her voice incredulous. “What are you talking about?”

Ben gave a short, bitter laugh. “When you came to me on the _ Supremacy _ .” He looked at her and she saw unexpected echoes of anger and betrayal on his face.

“You knew that I would have to kill Snoke or kill you. You made me choose between you and I chose you, because I thought you cared about me. You told me it wasn’t too late for me and I believed you.”

He shook his head in disgust at his own vulnerability. “But when I killed for you, all you wanted was for me to run back to the Resistance and kill for them, too.”

His face was a cold mask now and she couldn’t read the emotion in his eyes. “I won’t do it anymore. I killed enough people to further Snoke’s plans. Now, I kill for myself and my own advantage. I want you, but I won’t go back to being a dog for someone else’s cause.”

Rey felt sick. She had never thought about what her actions on the  _ Supremacy _ must have looked like to Ben. She had only wanted to save the lives of her friends and he had felt used. He looked so hurt.

“I’m sorry, Ben,” she whispered.

He paused and she felt him reach out to her through the Force. He was checking, she knew, to see if she was being honest.

When his mind met hers again, she allowed herself to feel, for the first time, the full puzzling extent of his feelings for her. It was a shifting mixture of fading resentment, possessiveness, desire, and fear for her safety.

She sighed deeply. She wasn’t sure at all how she felt now, except exhausted.

Ben, seemingly satisfied that she was not lying to him, shrugged and finally broke the tense silence. “What do we do now?”

Rey sighed. “I can’t go to you and you won’t come to me. What can we do?”

He walked over and pulled her into his arms again, resting his chin on her head. “I can wait for you to change your mind. I will do what I can to keep you safe, but I don’t want to argue with you anymore about what the First Order is doing.”

Rey pondered this for a moment. “Then you won’t ask me anything about the Resistance,” she said firmly. “When the Force connects us, it will be just you and me. We won’t talk about those things.”

Ben nodded, shooting her a small smirk. “So, we keep this a secret between us?”

“Yes,” Rey agreed. “It will be our secret. I don’t think anyone in the First Order or the Resistance would understand whatever this is that is happening between us.”

He ran his hands up her back, eyes hungrily scanning her face. “What exactly is happening between us?” he asked.

“I…I don’t know,” she whispered.

“Maybe we should find out.” He didn’t wait for her agreement. He brushed his lips over hers, once, twice.

So softly and yet every nerve in her body immediately felt electric and she wanted so much more.

She could feel his heart pounding beneath the hand that was resting on his chest and through the Force bond she felt his overwhelming joy, a sense of triumph that was so strong it took her breath away.

He took a deep breath, his entire body shuddering on the exhale. He pulled back and rested his forehead against hers. She looked at him, questions in her eyes.

“That’s more than I thought I would ever have,” he murmured. He swallowed hard, mustering all of his self-control, and stepping back from her.

“Think about what is happening between us,” he said, “and about what I am offering you.”

She blinked, and he was gone, leaving her with questions and a lingering sense of guilt. She pressed a shaking hand to her lips, where the light touch of his skin on hers still lingered.

She was betraying Leia, betraying the Resistance, and playing with a temptation she wasn’t sure she could resist, but she also couldn’t turn back.

Whatever was connecting them was too strong for either of them to back away from, despite being opposing sides of a war that was going to tear the galaxy apart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I posted this a day early for the Valentine's Day #ReyloLove event on Twitter, but the next chapter will go back to the usual posting schedule and be available on Saturday of next week. If you have made it this far, thank you so much for reading! I am extremely excited to be writing this story and hope everyone is enjoying reading it just as much!


	4. Invasion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We were together. I forget the rest.- Walt Whitman

Kylo needed time to think.

The _Finalizer_ was looming above a new planet with the rest of the First Order’s advancement troops and instead of staying behind in the Throne Room during the battle, as Snoke would have done, Kylo had slipped into the cockpit of his heavily modified TIE Silencer and led the air assault himself.

It was unnecessarily risky and probably stupid, he admitted, as an enemy fighter screamed past him and nearly clipped the wing of his TIE. 

Still, he needed this, the adrenaline that rushed under the surface of skin helped clear his mind.

He ignored the sneaky memory of his father saying nearly the same thing many years ago as he headed out for another dangerous mission on the Falcon, focusing instead on trying to maneuver his TIE back around to aim for the fighter that had nearly taken him out.

The demands of being Supreme Leader when the First Order was in turmoil were more than he had expected.

Hux was never far away with his list of complaints and thinly veiled demands. His attitude remained respectful on the surface, but he had enough venom lurking behind his eyes that Kylo had given in and brought the Knights of Ren back from the outer rim as a precaution against any scheming he might be doing.

They wouldn’t be content long trapped aboard his ship, and would start causing more problems than they solved if he didn’t get them back on missions soon, but for now they helped keep Hux’s vitriol in check.

_ A cur’s weakness, properly manipulated, can be a powerful tool. _

Kylo sighed, the impact of the voice had faded in the days since it had first reappeared and was no longer quite the source of panic it had been the first few times he had heard it.

_ So you told me,  _ he thought.  _ But I need more than a manipulated cur to fix the mess left behind when Starkiller Base and Supremacy were destroyed. _

_ You HAVE more,  _ the voice responded.  _ Or you could, if you bothered to look. Did you really think that I trusted you with everything? I was no fool. _

Kylo shook his head as he shot down yet another enemy fighter. There were few of them left now, and once they were eliminated the ground assault could begin.

That was a job he could leave to Hux and the stormtroopers.

He needed to find out what Snoke might have been hiding from him.

If there was more that could aid in his control over the First Order, then that would have to be his priority for now.

Half an hour later his TIE touched down in the hangar and he climbed quickly from the cockpit.

People were rushing forward to deal with repairs and refueling, but he paid them little attention as he marched toward his chambers.

Hux already had his orders to cut through the planet’s flimsy resistance and he didn’t expect any problems.

If he had been Snoke, where would he hide information about greater resources? And more importantly, where would he have gotten them?

Kylo knew Snoke hadn’t told him everything, to do so would indeed have been foolish, but how much could he realistically have kept hidden?

Maybe he could send the Knights to examine Snoke’s chambers in the ruins of the  _ Supremacy _ . It was a place to start searching, even if he wasn’t sure exactly what they were searching for, and it was better than nothing.

The door to his chambers slid closed behind him and he pulled off his cloak, dropping it unceremoniously on the nearest chair before dropping himself down in it, too.

Being the Supreme Leader was supposed to have made his life easier, instead it seemed like everything had been harder.

He couldn’t believe that was even possible.

He waited in the silence, hoping to feel the ripple in the Force that always happened just before Rey appeared, but nothing happened. He hadn’t seen her in a week.

Long enough to begin to wonder if she had found a way to sever the connection.

He had not intended for his last Force bond with Rey to go the way it had. He wanted to ease her into being comfortable with him.

She had moved toward him herself gradually the first few times they had connected, and then the events in the throne room had pushed them too quickly toward having to make choices.

He hadn’t been willing to let her die, but she hadn’t yet been willing to let go of the Resistance. He needed to give her more time and be patient.

He had never been patient, always wanted too much, too soon, been too greedy.

That was one of the things his parents used to whisper about behind closed doors when they thought he couldn’t hear them.

So, he had ruined everything with her again. Dumped all of his desires into her mind and pushed her too fast. He pressed one hand to face, rubbing the tension in his forehead.

He had shown her children, their children. No wonder she had blocked him out.

She had let him press his lips to hers, hold her in his arms for a few fleeting moments, but she must have regretted it.

The sense of loss was overwhelming. Every time he thought he had her in some capacity, she slipped through his fingers. He looked down at his gloved hand and realized it was clenched into a tight fist.

The urge to pull his lightsaber and smash everything in the room pulsed through him for a brief moment.

Then he felt it.

The quick ripple followed by a sudden stillness that sucked the air from his lungs. Her presence was always so bright, thrumming through the bond and lighting him up from within.

He turned his head, unable to do more than stare at her. He was too drained and too surprised that she had showed up just when he had given up hope.

She was scowling at him, hands pressed to her hips, and he could feel her irritation rolling off her in spiky waves.

“What?”

“Don’t you dare ask me ‘What’, Ben! Where the hell have you been? I was so worried about you!”

He blinked at her several times, mouth hanging slightly open in shock. Worried about him?

He tried to remember the last time someone worried about him but couldn’t seem to recall it ever happening. They feared him, but they didn’t worry about his safety.

“Well? Are you going to answer me?”

He didn’t. He stood up and took two large steps, wrapped his arms around her, and lifted her clear off her feet as he buried his face in the soft skin of her neck.

She squeaked in surprise but didn’t protest. “Ben?” her voice was hesitant, and he felt her hands come up to wrap around him. “Are you ok?”

He shook his head but didn’t move away from her. He stayed holding her, inhaling the now familiar scent of her skin and hair, trying to memorize the shape of her body as he held her.

She stayed quiet, and he could feel her bewilderment through the bond.

After several moments he murmured against her neck, “I thought you were gone, that you had found a way to shut me out.”

She pushed against him and he let go enough that she could see his face, though he didn’t put her down. “I don’t know how to do that, Ben…but even if I could, I wouldn’t.”

She looked sincere and he dropped his head to shoulder, the tension he had been carrying for days finally draining away.

He felt her hesitate then she reached up and buried her fingers in his hair. The groan slipped from his lips before he could stop it and she froze.

“I’m sorry! I didn’t mean…”

He chuckled at her misinterpretation of his reaction. “You didn’t hurt me, Rey.”

“But…you…”

He ran his hand up her neck, tangled his fingers gently in the hair she had trapped in a series of neat buns, and tugged. Her eyes widened and her lips parted in surprise.

“You didn’t hurt me,” he repeated, and she nodded with sudden understanding, though she was now watching him with wary eyes, as though unsure what he might do next.

He hadn’t really thought about it before, the lack of experience that she seemed to have with being touched.

He had been too consumed with his desire to touch her and being so certain that she would never allow it.

He knew she had spent most of her life in the hellhole of the desert on Jakku, and that she had been alone, as desperately lonely as he himself had always been.

He realized suddenly that this isolation seemed to extend to physical contact, and not just emotional connection.

The thought of being the first one to touch her, to show her how pleasurable touch could be, raced white hot through his mind.

He pushed down the more detailed images, didn’t want her to panic when she felt the intensity of his desire through the bond.

“It can be nice sometimes, being touched…” He let his voice trail off, and her cheeks turned pink again as trailed his fingers back down her neck.

He knew she was thinking about the same things he was. The vision he had shared with her of her in his bed and the feeling of his lips brushing softly against hers the last time they were together.

He laid his forehead against hers, their noses barely brushing against each other. She sighed softly and closed her eyes.

He felt the contentment rumble out from her through the bond, like the purr of Hux’s ridiculous cat.

He pulled back and pressed a light kiss to the tip of her nose, followed by one cheek and then the other. He couldn’t believe that she was here, that she was letting him hold her like this.

He felt for one brief moment as though he would never be able to ask for anything more, and then her eyes flicked open and met his.

They were clouded with confused desire and the thin thread of control he had been holding on to so tightly began to fray.

He dipped his head and captured her lips with his own, tracing the seam between them with the tip of his tongue until they parted in surprise, then dipping gently inside.

She stiffened in his arms and he froze, waiting for her to push him away in revulsion. Instead she flicked the tip of tongue against his, and pulled him closer, hand fisting in his hair.

The remaining piece of the thread snapped.

He forgot that he was trying to be patient with her, forgot that she was inexperienced, forgot everything he cared about and every thought he had ever had.

The only thing that mattered was the feel of her body pressed tightly to his and the warmth of her tongue sliding against his own.

Her shy hesitation was quickly replaced by her usual bold ferocity and when she nipped his bottom lip with her small sharp teeth he felt the force of his desire flood through the bond between them, flinging the door between open wider than it had ever been before.

He could suddenly feel everything she felt, everything she was. It was so much more than feeling her presence in the Force, as he did with others.

He was overwhelmed. Consumed. No longer able to tell where he ended, and she began.

Her emotions, sensations, thoughts, memories…they mixed and intertwined with his own so thoroughly that he feared they might never come undone.

He tossed her gently away from him, and she stepped back, chest heaving and breath coming in shallow bursts, watching him with concern and bewilderment on her face.

“Does that always happen?” she asked when she could nearly breathe properly again.

He shook his head, not quite able to speak as the bond between them slowly faded back to its usual pleasant hum.

Her eyes were wide for a moment longer, then suddenly narrowed. “Have you done a lot of this? Kissing?”

He shifted uncomfortably, unsure how to proceed when faced with this unexpected question. Honesty, he decided.

He had never lied to her, and the bond wouldn’t let him keep secrets from her even if he wanted to.

“Luke forbid attachments or physical contact when I lived at the temple,” he began, “but when I left, I went to Snoke and the Knights of Ren. They…didn’t feel the same way that Luke did, obviously, about those things. They encouraged it, not the attachments, but giving in to all forms of passion. Anger and pain are fuel for the dark, but often so is lust.”

He shrugged, there had been plenty of women, probably too many in those early days as he tried to bury his pain, but he didn’t want to dwell on the details of that with her.

He suddenly felt the press of her mind sliding into his and jerked his eyes up to her face in surprise. By the time he realized what she was doing and tried to push her out, it was too late, she had hooked into the memories she was searching for and dragged them out into the open between them.

They flashed by in quick succession, nothing more than a series of blurred images with no names and no faces.

He had used them and tossed them aside without a thought and not one of them had done anything to soothe the pain inside him.

He had eventually stopped trying, there was no solace to be found in empty human contact and his rage was a stronger connection to the dark power he was seeking.

Satisfied that he had nothing left to hide, Rey eased the pressure she was exerting through the Force and released her hold on his memories.

Her lips were pressed into a thin line, but she said nothing.

“Rey,” he began, irritated by the intrusion into memories he hadn’t wanted to share, but she shook her head.

“Starkiller Base,” she retorted, and he had to acknowledge that she had a point, so he let it drop.

He hoped she knew that his reaction to her, and the way he felt about her, was different than what he had experienced with the women she had seen in his memories.

He pushed that knowledge toward her through the bond and watched her body relax slightly. Without her irritation she looked suddenly vulnerable and extremely tired, he realized.

He was sure that the intense emotions they had dealt with together since she appeared played a part in that, but he also imagined that things were probably not any easier for her with the Resistance than they had been for him with the First Order.

His eyes swept over her, really noticing for the first time how small she looked, how young and fragile.

Maybe it was because of that vulnerability, which meant that right now she wasn’t looking at him with her usual snarling determination.

He dropped back down into his chair and closed his eyes. He held out a hand in her direction and when, after only a moment’s pause, she set her fingers against his palm he tugged softly on her arm until she sat down hesitantly on his knee.

He pulled her closer until she was curled in his lap with his chin resting on her head. He needed rest and it was apparent that she did as well.

Tomorrow would be soon enough to worry about Snoke’s secrets and how to handle the conflicted emotions he could feel churning from Rey through the bond. Tonight, he just wanted to feel a few minutes of peace before she disappeared again.

She sighed and he felt her relax against him completely. They were both soundly asleep in moments.

When he woke, she was gone, and the first thing he became aware of was the emptiness that her absence left in the Force. The more time he spent with her, the more her absence felt like a part of himself was missing.

It meant he woke up tense and angry.

It was early, but he was restless, so he changed quickly in a fresh set of clothes, swirled on his cloak and swept from the room. The Finalizer was a large ship and it took some time to get where he was going, but the hallways were mostly empty, and no one bothered him.

He finally arrived in the lower portion of the ship, in the area he was most familiar with, since it was the location of his former sleeping quarters. It was also the section of the ship where the Knights of Ren stayed when they were on board.

The door opened with a soft hiss after he keyed in the entry code and he entered the main hall of this section of the ship.

He walked to the first door on the left, raised his fist, and pounded sharply until shouted curses informed him that the occupant was awake.

He repeated this until he had pounded on every door, and then he waited for them to all tug on some semblance of clothing and their helmets and stagger out into the hallway.

They weren’t pleased to be awake so early, but they wouldn’t challenge his authority. They knew better than that.

“I have a job for you.” Kylo noticed that they seemed less irritated about being awake once they realized it meant getting off the Finalizer and back into some action.

“Go back to Snoke’s chambers on the  _ Supremacy _ and tear it apart, look for anything unusual, anything that seems like he had secrets to keep or the First Order had resources to hide. If you find it, bring it to me immediately.”

What was left of the ship had crash landed on Crait, but there might have been enough left for them to salvage information, if there was any to be had.

He waited only long enough for them to nod in agreement before turning on his heel and walking out, headed for the bridge.

He assumed Hux would be there and wanted to hear an update on the progress of the ground forces taking over the planet below.

It was the main distribution center of a major trade route and securing it would help keep surrounding systems under control while boosting morale and confidence in his leadership abilities among First Order troops.

The Knights of Ren would be back soon, and if they brought him the news he expected he would soon have the resources to give Hux everything he insisted they needed to able to take the next steps toward securing the rest of the galaxy under the First Order’s control.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a short bonus chapter since I already posted Chapter 3 this week. Chapter 5, Conflicted, will be posted next Saturday.
> 
> I have a thing for innocent cuddling in my angst stories, but I won't keep them apart for too long before I let them have the smut they deserve.


	5. Union

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The only way to get rid of temptation is to yield to it.- Oscar Wilde

Rey opened her eyes in surprise. It was mostly dark in her room, and the Falcon was still and quiet.

It felt like very early morning, before even the animals outside stirred with the rising of the sun.

She could feel him, his presence in the Force slipping in to surround her, moments before he reached out and wrapped an arm around her waist. He was sleeping, and his mind hummed with restless dreams.

It had been two weeks since she had seen him for longer than a few moments. The Force bond between them had given her only glimpses.

Enough to know he was there, but not much beyond that.

She could tell he was getting increasingly frustrated and she was getting increasingly worried about him.

Every day that went by he was getting angrier and the circles under his eyes were getting darker, like he wasn’t sleeping well.

She sighed, knowing that she shouldn’t be so worried about him. He was, after all, the man behind the very thing she was sworn to fight against, but she couldn’t stop herself.

She had to admit that she was getting frustrated, as well. She had been so cranky that even Finn had taken to avoiding her, spending more and more time with Rose.

Leia seemed to attribute her recent poor attitude to stress and a reaction to the news that the First Order had forcibly taken over several new systems, but Rey knew the truth.

She had spent far less of her waking hours over the last two weeks worrying about the First Order and far more of them worrying about Ben.

The rumors said he was often leading the fights in the air. Charging through space in his very distinctive TIE Silencer. Everyone knew which ship was his and he was a primary target in every battle.

There had been near misses several times with the pilots of the system protection fleets.

He was being reckless, seemingly on purpose. She wanted to ask what he was thinking, but she knew she couldn’t ask about the First Order’s activities.

They had a deal and if she broke it there was nothing to stop him from asking her about the Resistance. She wasn’t sure she could keep the information from him if he was looking for it.

The bond was making things harder to hide as they grew closer.

She felt the muscles in his arm tighten as his mind floated toward consciousness. He had sensed her. She felt the sudden thrill that ran through him, followed by the possessiveness and the hunger.

He wasn’t awake enough yet to have his guard up and for a moment everything rushed into her, not blunted by his usual attempt at control.

The darkness inside him and the urges that drove it pounded into her through the bond.

She shivered. It wanted to consume her, to take everything about her and use it until it was gone. And still, she knew, he would want more.

He pulled her close to him, buried his face in her shoulder, and wrestled with his desires, trying to get himself under control.

She felt him begin to slowly relax, and the darkness to slide back, if not entirely away.

She had noticed that the more often they were together, the calmer he was able to be when he was with her.

He was Kylo Ren to everyone else, but she knew she often got glimpses of the man Ben should have been. The man she had to admit she still hoped he could one day become.

He finally lifted his head and met her curious stare with relief in his eyes. “You’re here.”

“So are you. Good morning, Ben.” She smiled, trying to infuse as much joy as she could into the simple gesture. He looked like he needed it.

She had missed him, she realized. Missed him so much, and it didn’t matter that he was her enemy or how many planets the First Order had invaded under the command of Kylo Ren.

She never felt alone when he was here, never felt the need to hide parts of who she was to gain his approval. He accepted everything about her without so much as a ripple of unease.

She pushed a stray black curl off his forehead and let her fingers trail down his cheek.

He watched her solemnly, eyes dark in his too pale face, as she traced the line of the scar on his face.

The one she had given him in the forest on Takodona. She had been so angry and so frightened of him.

“I’m sorry, Ben. I’m sorry that I hurt you.”

His eyes were wide and strangely haunted, as though he couldn’t believe what he was hearing. She wondered if anyone had ever apologized for hurting him before.

“I hurt you first,” he muttered. “Trying to find Luke and then in the forest. After…”

She knew he was thinking of Han and what had happened. She flinched from the pain she could feel radiating from him through the bond.

He wasn’t ready to deal with that yet, and she wasn’t ready to push the subject again and risk pushing him away.

She lifted her shoulder in a dismissive shrug. “We were fighting a war. We didn’t know anything about each other then. I just hope we can forgive each other for all of that and not think about it anymore.”

He shook his head. “There’s nothing to forgive. I was never angry, not at you.”

She nodded, swallowing hard, pushing down the urge to beg him to leave the First Order and come to her. He wouldn’t, not yet, not any more than she would leave the Resistance.

As long as she was loyal to them, these stolen moments were all she could have with Ben and she silently begged the Force to never make her choose between his life and theirs.

She rubbed her thumb absently over his lips, lost in thought and worry about the future.

He pressed a soft kiss to her thumb, then another to the palm of her hand. He was so soft, lying in her bed with his head on her pillow.

He was barefoot again and wearing only loose sleeping pants. His hair was a mess and he looked content and vulnerable.

It was hard to believe this was the same man that had cut through Snoke’s guards with a violence and savagery that had taken her breath away.

The darkness in him simmered just below the surface, but she was becoming increasingly aware that it lurked inside her, too. The more she was with him, the closer to the surface it lingered.

They couldn’t exist in this state forever. One of them was going to turn and they both knew it. It was a matter of time before being apart like this was going to be more than either of them could bear, and then one of them would break and this tug of war between them would be over.

She was doing everything she could to make sure he stood on her side at the end.

Her eyes dipped to his lips. She wanted him to kiss her again, the way he had the last time that they were together like this.

The bond between them had flared open so far and so quickly that it had frightened them both, but it didn’t seem so bad looking back on it.

Being so close to him had actually been thrilling.

The corner of his mouth tipped up in the ghost of a smile, and she knew he was feeling her desire through the bond, but he hesitated.

He must be thinking of the last time, too, and how overwhelming the connection had been.

“I’m not afraid,” she whispered. “Not of you.”

He sighed softly, “Maybe you should be. Everyone has been afraid of me my whole life.”

“Not me,” Rey stated. Her voice was soft, but firm. “I know you won’t hurt me, Ben.”

He cupped her cheek in his hand and placed his lips on hers. He was soft and so careful, as though he was trying to prove her right. Show her that he was worthy of her trust.

She could feel the heat growing inside her, the need for more. Her fingers slid into his hair, drawing him closer, pulling him in.

She deepened the kiss this time, welcoming the physical closeness as she drew his tongue between her teeth and the emotional closeness as their mingled desires began to deepen the connection between them.

She felt his hand on her hip, fingers digging into her through the rough blanket that covered most of her body.

She wanted to feel him, the press of his hands on her skin, so she slipped the blanket down, pushing into a heap by her feet.

His breath hissed out between clenched teeth. She was wearing her usual sleeping attire which consisted of nothing but a loose breast wrap and the small bit of fabric that covered her most intimate parts.

She knew she was blushing, but she was hoping in the darkness that he wouldn’t notice.

His eyes roved over her in what little light was available. He reached out a shaking hand and placed it on the bare skin of her outer thigh and she could feel the darkness he was fighting against raging inside him.

Her own was rising to meet it, fueled by his lust and her desire to give in to it.

“It’s ok,” she said simply as she ran her fingers up his arm, reveling in the strength of the muscle just beneath the skin.

Feeling his desire made her bolder, unashamed of her own feelings. “I want you to touch me.”

He pulled her in, devouring her mouth with a renewed desperation. She could feel the heat of him now, the bare skin of his chest pressing against her. His hands roamed freely, pulling her leg up to rest on his hip as he nestled closer to the center of her and then following the curve of her body up to cover her breast.

She arched into him shamelessly, struggling to get closer.

He rolled onto her, the full weight of him pressing her into the bed, but it wasn’t enough, she needed to be closer. She wrapped her legs around his waist, pressing her body against him.

The bond between them was as encompassing as his body surrounding her. His desires echoed her own and pushed her further and faster.

She heard the sound of rending fabric and then felt his hands on her bare breasts, his fingers sliding across the delicate peak of her nipple. She nipped her teeth into his neck in response and heard his sharp intake of breath.

He locked eyes with her, astonished at her boldness and her greed.

“More, Ben. Please don’t stop.” She nodded slightly, emphasizing her words.

She didn’t want him to stop, didn’t want him to think she was timid or afraid of him.

He ran a hand down her arm, circled her wrist with his fingers and pulled it slowly above her head, then did the same with the other, pinning them both with one large hand as he watched her expression for signs of reluctance.

When he saw none, he used his free hand to tug at her underwear. Another faint ripping sound and she was completely uncovered, naked and unashamed beneath him.

When his hand slipped between her legs and found the core of her already wet with desire he groaned and pressed another desperate kiss to her already swollen lips.

She lifted her hips and pressed into his fingers as he explored her folds. “Ben, please.” His name on her lips was a prayer, an invitation, a desperate plea.

“Shhh,” he murmured, nuzzling his face into her neck. “I know. I can feel you and I know what you want.”

She knew he was right, the line between his thoughts and hers had all but disappeared.

He removed his hand and she pushed her disappointment out to him through the bond.

“Patience, sweetheart,” he whispered, and she realized he was simply using his free hand to push his clothing aside.

In moments he was poised at the entrance to her, and his eyes were locked on hers.

They moved together as one, pushing together until he was buried fully inside her.

She knew he would have stopped, given her inexperienced body time to adjust, but she was already writhing beneath him, legs wrapped tightly around his waist.

She was full nearly to the point of pain and she needed him to move, every instinct her body possessed was begging for it.

He grabbed her hip, held her body still as he slid out of her slowly then pressed back inside, watching her intently as her eyes widened at the new sensations.

She could feel the jumbled rush of his emotions as she moaned from the pleasure of it.

Triumph, possessiveness, pride at the way she wanted more of him.

He pulled out again slowly and paused, waited until the daze of sensation cleared and her eyes focused on his, then gripped her hip firmly and slammed back inside her.

She threw her back at the suddenness of it, the pure ecstasy of feeling him so deeply inside her.

He repeated it again and again, until she was an incoherent mess of need panting out her pleas on sobbing breaths.

When he finally released her hands, she wrapped her arms around him, clinging desperately to the only part of her world she could still sense.

Everything else had disappeared from her consciousness.

He began to move slowly, steadily inside her. Pushing them both toward the peak she knew was coming. She could feel his anticipation and the familiarity he had for the experience.

She pushed that thought away, determined not to let the memories she had pulled from his mind of him touching others ruin this moment for her.

She knew he sensed it, felt his momentary sadness and a stumble in the pace he had set with is body. He tipped her chin up with his finger and pressed a hot lingering kiss to her mouth.

He pushed his memories into her mind. A stream of moments with his thoughts and feelings attached. All of them were about her.

Seeing her in the forest on Takodona and his desperation to have her close to him. Standing in the snow with her eyes locked on his between their crossed sabers and his desperate fear that he had lost her.

The joy of seeing her for the first time through the Force bond.

The absolute resolve he had felt as they stepped off the elevator into the throne room on the Supremacy, clutching the secret knowledge that he was going to kill Snoke for her.

The thrill of pressing his lips to hers for the first time.

Threaded through it all were his impressions of her beauty, his respect for her strength, his desire to have her by his side and in his bed.

“It was always you,” he whispered. “I wanted you before I even knew who you were.”

She pressed her tear stained face into his shoulder, drowning in feelings she couldn’t explain as he held her close and drove both of them over the edge into ecstasy.

She pressed her mouth against his skin to stifle her cries and felt the warmth of him spread through her as he pressed into her depths and emptied himself into her.

She drifted back down, pressed into the bed under the weight of him, while her mind wandered over the predicament that she was in.

She was in love with him. Clearly and desperately and impossibly. She was also reasonably certain, based on the images and the feelings that he had passed her through the bond, that he was equally in love with her.

She sighed and he rolled off of her, mumbling about not trying to crush her, and pulled her on top of his chest.

His fingers traced a soothing trail down her spine, and she smiled sweetly at him.

He smiled back, a real smile that broke across his face like the rising sun.

He was laughing softly and radiating joy into the bond. She ran her thumb across his lips, feeling his happiness roll into her.

“I love you, Ben.”

She hadn’t meant to say it. She wanted to hold that knowledge to herself and wait for the right time to tell him but seeing that smile and feeling his happiness had caused such a swell of emotion that she couldn’t keep it inside her.

He froze, momentarily stunned, then sat up quickly, dragging her onto his lap and kissing her breathless again.

“I love you, Rey, so much,” his voice was strained, and she knew it was a struggle for him to say something like that out loud. “Does that mean…I can send the coordinates for the Finalizer.”

Her smile faltered and she watched sadly as a guarded expression returned to his face.

“I can’t. I know we still have…some things that need to be settled between us, but just for today please don’t think about those things. Let’s just be happy that we have so much more than we even thought possible.”

He frowned, but he didn’t argue.

When he laid back down on the bed, she dropped her head back into his chest and stayed there, listening to the sound of his heartbeat until they heard the sounds of the others waking up aboard the Falcon.

She sighed. “I have to go. Busy day today.”

“Anything dangerous?” His voice was sharp and concerned.

“It shouldn’t be. Just moving some stuff around.” It wasn’t a lie. She would be moving things. The Falcon and everyone on it. Leia had finally chosen the planet for their new base and today was moving day.

He nodded, though he was clearly still reluctant to let her go.

Rey struggled for a moment, but couldn’t stop herself from blurting out, “Hey, can you maybe try to go one or two days without trying to get yourself killed in a fight over some planet? It’s hard for me to think about anything else when you are out there almost dying every day.”

“Who said I almost died? I haven’t almost died. I’m an excellent pilot!”

He sounded terribly offended. That’s just wishful thinking on their part,” he muttered darkly.

“Just be careful, Ben,” she chided, standing up and walking over to grab her clothes from the carefully folded pile next to the bed.

She blushed again, feeling his eyes on her nakedness and the resulting surge of his desire echoing through the bond.

Her brow furrowed as she picked up her clothing. “You owe me new clothes,” she said, picking up a torn scrap of fabric from the bed and waving it in the air.

He didn’t answer and she felt suddenly sorry for teasing him.

She opened her mouth to apologize, explain that she had more, but he finally spoke.

“Did I hurt you?” He looked ashamed, which tore at heart.

She could still feel him and knew she would be sore from having him inside her, but she was far from hurt.

“No, you didn’t,” she said fervently, sitting next to him again and placing a firm kiss on his lips. “I loved it and I want to do it again as soon as possible.”

His eyes lit up and she laughed, standing quickly and moving just out of reach.

“But I can’t right now. Everyone is going to be looking for me soon.”

He groaned and dropped back onto her pillow. “I hate the Resistance,” he rumbled, and she knew he sincerely meant every word.

She was incredibly tempted. He was glorious, lying on her bed looking so confident and smug. If she thought there was enough time, she would have crawled back into the bed with him.

“Later,” she promised with a smile and turned to pull on new undergarments. When she turned back around, he was gone, and her world was once again empty.

Without him beside her to keep the world at bay, the reality of what had happened and the choices she had made came rushing back, and she sat down on the side of the bed with a thump.

Her guilt slid through her again and her fingers twisted into the rough blanket. The things she was allowing to happen between them were dangerous.

She had comforted herself over these past weeks that she was trying to bring him back to the light, but she had felt the strength of the darkness inside her grow when she was with him.

The lust, the pride, the urge to hold him near her at all costs.

She could see it clearly when he was gone, though she wasn’t strong enough to push it away. When he was with her, all of that ceased to matter.

The only thing she could focus on when he looked at her was the desire in his eyes and the overwhelming need to be with him.

The visions he had showed her in the forest, the ones of them together and ruling the galaxy with their children, seemed more appealing to her with each passing day.

She jumped at the knock on her bedroom door, followed by Rose softly calling her name.

“I’m awake!” she called. “Be there in just a minute!”

She shook off the guilt and tugged on her clothes. She really did need new ones after all the wear her currently limited options had gotten lately, she thought ruefully.

She passed Rose in the tiny hallway and tried to smile normally though she was suddenly nervous.

Did she still have Ben’s scent lingering on her skin? Were her lips as swollen from his kisses as they felt?

She wasn’t normally the kind to be overly concerned with her appearance, but she felt like a marked woman, fundamentally changed by the events of last night in a way she was sure would be visible to everyone who looked at her.

She rushed into the tiny fresher, glad that no one else was waiting for a turn, and reluctantly cleaned all traces of Ben from her body.

Her wrists were blessedly not bruised from his grip and a thorough check in the small mirror reassured her that there was no evidence anywhere else on her body that would give away her activities of the previous night.

By the time she had stepped back into the hallway, she had tried to tuck last night away into the corner of her mind and so she could focus on today’s task.

She found Chewie and Poe waiting for her in the dining area, already eating breakfast. She smiled warmly, “Are you two ready to finally get out of here?”

Poe looked at her suspiciously but nodded. “You seem to be in a better mood today,” he remarked pointedly.

She plucked a piece of fruit from his plate and popped it into her mouth.

“Do I? Can’t imagine why. Must be the excitement of finally getting to start setting up a new base.”

Chewie roared and Rey nodded. “Yes, it will be good to see the others again. The ones who come back, anyway.”

“We have to keep hope, Rey. They’ll come,” Rose said as she walked in and sat down next to Chewie. “The Resistance can take down the First Order, we just have to work together.”

Rey smiled encouragingly, trying to hide her mixed emotions.

The First Order needed to end but not until she had found a way to get Ben out of there.

She couldn’t lose him. If she did, she knew some part of her would simply die with him.

She couldn’t explain it, but she could sense it, just as surely as she could sense him in the Force.

Leia walked into the room with Finn, who winked subtly at Rose.

Rey couldn’t help but smile at Rose’s blush. Things seemed to be working out well between them and it made her happy to see others have a love that was sweet and relatively uncomplicated.

Leia looked around, smiling sadly at the group huddled together at the small table.

“Everyone ready? We have a planet that meets all of our needs and has no trace of First Order presence. I am familiar with it, Luke explored it many years ago, when he was first exploring the galaxy looking for Jedi relics. Our new home will be on Ajan Kloss.”

Rey wasn’t familiar with it, but she was ready to make it her new home if Leia said it was a good choice.

Soon enough she was sitting with Chewie in the pilot’s seat of the Falcon and inputting coordinates to the planet.

Rose came in to stand behind them. “Have you heard of this place?” she asked. She chuckled when Rey and Chewie both shook their heads. “Well, I guess it’s always an adventure with the Resistance.”

The dotted stars turned to long streams of light as the Falcon jumped to lightspeed and carried them toward their new home. Rey hoped it wasn’t a sand planet.

After so many years on Jakku, she hated sand.

Rose stayed during the journey, making idle talk with Rey that more often than not circled around to something Finn had said or done.

Rey wished with all her heart that she could talk to Rose about Ben, the things he said to her and how full of love her every waking thought had become.

Everything between them had happened so quickly and she wanted desperately to talk to someone. It hurt to have to keep it all inside.

When they emerged from hyperspace and Rey spotted a planet covered in lush green, she let out an audibly relieved breath.

Chewie roared a question as he began to prepare the ship for landing. “Yeah, I was worried it might be covered in sand, but I’m glad it isn’t snow, too.”

After landing the ship in a small clearing, Rey and Chewie went back to join the others.

Leia was already speaking to the group when they arrived. “There’s life on this planet, but it’s not inhabited by any sentient life forms. We are free to move around the planet as needed and to set up a base that is large enough to house as many volunteers as we can get.”

It was a relief to all of them after spending weeks worrying about being discovered and Rey could feel much of the tension in the room begin to disappear.

“Initial scans show large caverns just outside the area where we landed. That will give us easy access to places to house people and store supplies.”

Leia nodded at the information Rey had provided. “We will need to explore those and send the signal out to the rest of our forces so that those who are still willing can join us.”

“I just hope Ben doesn’t pick up that signal,” Rey muttered, absolutely sure he would be here personally before the rest of the First Order even knew what was happening, bundling her up and carrying her off to the Finalizer as he had once done to Starkiller Base.

Finn, who was standing just a bit too close, turned to her with confusion on his face. “What? I didn’t quite catch what you said.”

“Oh, just that I hope Ren and the First Order don’t pick up on our signal.” She had slipped up again, calling him Ben in front of the others.

She had done it so often since the Supremacy that most of them had now started calling him Ren instead of Kylo.

“If the rest of you would like to start the exploration process and set up to send the signal, I would like a word with Rey alone, please.”

Rey’s eyes darted to her in alarm. Leia was Force sensitive and Rey had already seen evidence that she might be powerful enough to sense Rey’s raging emotions, Ben’s presence on the Falcon, or any number of other things that she was trying desperately to hide.

The others all left, discussing options for base arrangements and who they thought would be the first of the others to arrive to support the Resistance, leaving Rey alone with Leia and her own rising panic.

Leia’s voice, however, gave no indication that anything was wrong. “I wanted to speak to you privately because I wasn’t entirely honest earlier about how much I knew about this planet. Luke did come here in the early days of the New Republic, but he wasn’t alone. I came with him and did a few months of Jedi training.”

Rey felt jaw drop. No one had ever told her that Leia had been trained at all in the way of the Jedi.

“Not nearly enough to attain true Jedi status, of course, but maybe enough that I could help you begin your own training. Just the basics of mediation, Jedi principles, and guidelines for the use of the Force?”

Rey smiled, “I would love that. Luke wasn’t terribly happy about having me on Ahch-to, so I didn’t learn much while I was with him.”

Leia nodded, “I suspected as much. I hope I am able to help you, even if I don’t have much knowledge myself.”

Rey hesitated, not wanting to upset Leia by asking the wrong question but ultimately unable to contain her curiosity. “Why did you not finish your training? Why doesn’t anyone else know about this?”

“Well, no one else knows because I never spoke about my Force sensitivity. I needed it to remain a secret if I didn’t want political rivals digging around and discovering that my father was Darth Vader.”

Leia shook her head ruefully. “Of course, that information was eventually discovered anyway, and I was forced out of the new Senate.”

Rey smiled sympathetically, knowing how much that must have hurt Leia after all of her work building the new government.

“The decision not to finish Jedi training was easy,” Leia continued. “The new government was struggling in establishing order after the fall of the Empire and I had valuable experience they needed. More importantly, though, I was in love with Han and I wouldn’t have been able to marry him if I was going to abide by the Jedi rule of nonattachment.”

Rey’s eyes widened slightly, her heart dropping into stomach. She knew little about the rules of the Jedi, knowing them only as great galactic heroes and peacekeepers.

“Nonattachment is an actual rule? Jedi aren’t permitted to marry?”

Leia shook her head. “Jedi are forbidden to have attachments. No marriages or children.”

Children, Rey thought sadly. Being a Jedi meant that she would lose Ben and that the vision he had shared with her about having a family together could never be real.

She felt suddenly lost, unsure of how to reconcile this information with her simultaneous love of Ben and desire to be a Jedi.

Leia suddenly looked terribly sad and very fragile. Rey knew that she was struggling with the loss of her husband and her son.

Damn him, she thought. Ben needed to come home and make peace with his mother, before it was too late.

“What happened to him Leia? Why won’t he come back?”

Leia seemed to know exactly who she was talking about and an unspoken message passed between them.

“It was Snoke. He was pulling on Ben from before he was born. I tried to help, to stop the nightmares and block his mind, but I wasn’t strong enough. I sent him to Luke, but it only made it worse.”

She paused and took a deep breath. “You saw him, didn’t you? On Starkiller base?” She waited for Rey to nod. “He was…was ok? I mean…” Leia’s voice trailed away.

Rey nodded again, unsure of how to proceed without revealing too much and hurting Leia further. “He is lost in his conflict,” she said, deciding that the truth was the safest way to answer.

“He offered to teach me,” she continued, searching Leia’s face and her presence in the Force for signs of her reaction. “He wanted me to be like him.”

Leia was visibly surprised. “Did he?” she murmured. “How unusual. Well, I am glad that you are still here with us. Hopefully, someday, my son will be, too.”

Rey smiled and reached out to hug Leia. “I hope so, too.”

Leia shrewdly watched her go as she stepped out of the Falcon to join the others.

So, Ben had asked Rey to join him?

She was still here, yes, but the girl had shown a particular interest in Ben since she had returned to them from her mission on Ahch-to. Leia wasn’t sure how or what had occurred between them, but the girl clearly cared about Ben.

How unusual, indeed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't plan on having them falling into love and intimacy so quickly but it's the only way that this story makes sense to me. They are so drawn to each other that it feels inevitable. 
> 
> Can you tell that they are each pulled more toward personal balance in the Force when they are together? 
> 
> Thanks for reading, this story is so important to me because I need to undo everything TROS did these beautiful characters!


	6. Snoke's Legacy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You reek of love and lust  
> I can no longer smell the difference  
> -MSR

Kylo slouched in the throne that had once belonged to Snoke, legs splayed and his chin resting in his hand.

Hux was droning on about something he didn’t care about at all, while a group of other high-ranking officers nodded along in support of whatever it was.

This was the worst part of being the Supreme Leader and it was, he realized, why Snoke had kept both Hux and Kylo as middlemen between himself and all of these mundane responsibilities.

_ Wouldn’t you rather be doing something else right now? _

Kylo rubbed his gloved hand over his face. He was having enough trouble dealing with the sound of Hux’s gratingly irritating voice in his ears, without having to deal with Snoke’s voice in his mind.

_ Soon you’ll have to act, stop sitting in meetings and do something about the Resistance. That scavenger won’t stay hidden forever. _

_ She’s plotting against you. You thought she wanted to be with you, but she left you to die and never looked back. She deserves to be punished for her betrayal. _

Kylo immediately tried to smother his surprise and confusion. He stared straight ahead as the voice continued, tearing through him with its insidious message.

_ Did you think I couldn’t sense your pathetic weakness for her? That she still haunts your dreams? _

_ You waste your time fantasizing about her caring for you, about her letting you touch her. She is never going to let you be truly near her with your corrupted soul. _

Kylo clenched his teeth as memories of the previous morning rolled through his mind. Snoke was wrong.

She had already pulled him into her, opened her body to take him in and moaned her pleasure beneath him. She said she loved him. She had already given him everything he could have asked for.

_ You’ll never have her. She works for the Resistance and any caring you thought she had for you was because they wanted to use her as a distraction. _

_ They can sense your weakness; they use her against you…And you allow it. Pathetic child. Your own parents didn’t love you. Did you really think she would? _

His parents…would his mother have been so cruel, so callous, as to use Rey against him in that way? Would she have asked Rey to give him her body if she thought it would help the Resistance?

He thought of her stubborn, single-minded devotion to the Republic, the Resistance, and even the ridiculous principles of the Jedi.

The greater good of the many came before the well-being of the one. Whoring out the next generation might not be too far out the realm of the possibility after the disaster that the Resistance endured on Crait.

But what about Rey? Would she do it? Would she be with him if she didn’t mean it?

His thoughts wandered back to the scene on the  _ Supremacy _ . He had believed she would be with him then, and she had run back to her friends and left him alone.

A small seed of doubt implanted itself in his mind, and the darkness within fed it, encouraging its growth and the simultaneous burst of rage that exploded through him.

He stood up suddenly and Hux stumbled to a surprised halt mid sentence as he stalked out the room.

“Inform me immediately if the Knights of Ren return, otherwise I do not wish to be disturbed.”

He entered his chambers so enraged the furnishings and windows vibrated from the echoes he was sending through the Force. He stripped off cloak and gloves, tossing them aside carelessly.

What a fool he had been, to think anyone could ever love him.

She had pretended to love him, given him her body, and he had humbled and humiliated himself by giving her all of the limited goodness he had inside.

If she was so devoted to the Resistance that she would give herself to him in pretense, then she deserved to know exactly what they were fighting against.

He reached out through the Force, found the thin thread of the bond that connected them, and poured all of his energy and concentration into following it.

He had tried before, desperately wishing to bring her close to him, but the distance had always seemed insurmountable.

This time his pain and his rage drove him, pulsing into the thread and lighting it up as he followed it across the galaxy toward her presence.

He closed his eyes as she got closer, focusing on her with laser-like precision, and when he opened them again, she was standing in front of him. She smiled and fresh rage washed over him.

It took only a moment for her smile to falter. He knew she could see it in his face, feel it in the bond.

“Ben?” She took a step back from him and he smiled. Good, let her be afraid.

“What did it take for my mother to convince you?” The words were soft, but dangerously controlled.

She shook her head, raised her hands in supplication. “Convince me of what? I don’t understand.”

He began to prowl around her, making a wide circle and forcing her to turn with him to prevent him from getting behind her.

“To come to me again. To hold yourself out like a piece of meat in front of me. Did she really think that getting you under me would drag me back to the light?”

He watched her brow furrow, like she was struggling to understand his meaning.

“Or was she just hoping I’d be too busy burying myself in you to bother being Supreme Leader?” he sneered.

Enlightenment dawned across her features, followed by a quick flash of her own temper. He didn’t see the hit coming, as unexpected as it was and with his own anger drowning out her feelings in the bond.

Her balled fist slammed into stomach with surprising force. He doubled over, looking up into her face in surprise as she snarled.

This wasn’t the soft pliable woman who had clung to his body while their shared pleasure had rolled through them.

She was damn near feral and somehow, even though he had seen it in her when she fought, he had forgotten it.

“What did you just say to me?”

He straightened to his full height again, towering over her diminutive form. He wasn’t about to back down now, not when he knew the truth. “You heard me, scavenger.”

Her eyes narrowed dangerously, but she didn’t raise her arm to strike him again.

“I should have seen it myself. It was so obvious. There’s no way you would have ever let me touch you unless there was something in it for you.” He felt a perverse sense of satisfaction to watch the pain flash across her face.

“I take it you don’t consider the pleasure of sharing your bed to be its own reward?” Her tone was scathing, and he felt the heat rise in his face.

“Do you deny it, then?”

She growled at him and his brows lifted in surprise.

“Do I deny it? Do I deny letting your mother turn me out to you like a whore in order to protect the Resistance?” Her voice was rising, and he could feel the churning of her emotions reaching out through the bond to wrestle with his own.

Her chest was heaving, and she was clearly furious. She was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen, damn her.

She saw the flicker in his eyes, felt the subtle shift of his thoughts, and bared her teeth at him. “Is that what you want, then? You want what you think your mother put me up to?”

She launched herself at him, coiling and springing before he had a chance to do more than brace himself.

Not in violence, as he first thought, or at least not entirely. She wrapped her legs around his waist and fisted her hands in his hair, as though she was afraid he might try to shake her off.

She crushed her mouth against his, teeth scraping his lips as she plunged her tongue into his mouth with a ferocity that took his breath away.

He gripped her hips, spinning from the impact of her body, and reached out with the Force to navigate to the nearest surface.

He stumbled a few steps with her in his arms and pressed her back into the smooth surface of the transparisteel in one of the chamber’s large view ports. 

He could feel her anger pulsing into him, barely controlled rage mixed with a heavy dose of lust. It was a dizzying mixture and one he stood no chance against.

He drug her head back, hand fisting in her hair and teeth sinking into the delicate flesh. She shuddered, moaned, and bucked against him.

She was pulling at his clothes, tearing at the fabric with her quick and nimble little fingers. She pulled his shirt off without removing her legs from around his waist.

Her eyes darkened as she looked at him, hands roaming freely and without hesitation over his chest and arms.

Whatever shyness she had the last time had been burned away by her anger.

She pulled him close and sank her teeth into his shoulder. He felt the bright bloom of pain and grunted.

A thrill raced through her, clearly discernible through the bond, and he chuckled darkly.

She was always so full of light in his mind and to feel her like this, riding the high of power, anger, and sex, was more arousing than anything he had ever experienced.

He thought she had already given him everything.

He had been wrong.

She lifted her head and he looked into her eyes. They were wild and uninhibited, and her hair was tumbling down around her shoulders.

His blood lingered on her mouth. He could feel the warmth of it dripping from the wound she had left in skin.

He raised his hand and used his thumb to smear the stain across her lips, groaned when the small, pink tip of her tongue flicked out to taste it.

He knew this was the best of her.

The part that she hid away from everyone else as they pressured her to be perfect. She  _ was _ perfect, he thought, in her savagery. They were just blind to it.

Her thoughts rippled out to him, showing him quick, bright flashes of his own memories. Just enough to create a blurred impression of something she knew he enjoyed.

He shuddered at the thought of her doing something like that to him, willingly…eagerly…

Her lips curled into what was almost a smile as she finally let go of the tight grip her legs had on his waist. She hit her knees in front of him and he swallowed hard.

She was pushing thoughts at him, showing him everything she wanted to do to him, and he was so hard already that it hurt.

When her fingers skimmed the skin of his stomach, he hissed out a breath between clenched teeth.

Sensing his reaction, she reached forward to press a kiss in the same spot, tracing a path with her mouth just above the fabric of his pants.

He placed both hands on the window behind her and leaned into it before his legs gave out completely.

She tugged on the fabric of clothing, working the hidden fastenings until she was able to slide his pants down his hips.

When her fingers gripped his aching hardness, he tipped his head back and begged the Force for mercy. When she flicked her tongue across the tip of him, he begged harder.

But Rey, and the Force, were merciless. She began to work her hand over him, her fingers finding the perfect amount of pressure, the perfect speed.

He opened his eyes and looked at her. Her lips were parted slightly and knew what she was almost as aroused by everything she was doing to him as he was. She had been watching him, waiting for him to focus his attention on her face.

She leaned forward as he watched and placed her mouth around him.

She never broke eye contact.

She still had his blood on her lips.

Her figure was outlined against the window and behind her stars shone against the blackness.

He clutched at the moment, pressing it into his memory.

The perfect Jedi, undone and marked by his body, his lust, his love.

The victory coursed through him as viciously as the pleasure from the wicked things she was doing with her mouth.

His breath was soon coming in shallow gasps as he tried to keep his hips still. She used her lips and her tongue to toy with him, taking him fully into her mouth for only a few short strokes before pulling away to trace the length of him with the tip of her tongue.

He knew she was using the bond against him, reading his feelings and sharing in his pleasure to find exactly the right thing to do.

She was angry and trying to humble him and he had allowed it so far, but when she looked up at him and smirked, he had finally had enough of her pleasurable little game.

Her eyes widened in surprise when he bent down suddenly and swept her into his arms.

“Ben?”

He ignored her, striding toward his bed with purpose driven steps. When he reached it, he tossed her down so unceremoniously that she bounced.

“Let’s get you out of these clothes,” he murmured, working his own fingers over Rey’s clothing with a speed that rivaled her removal of his own.

Her momentary uncertainty was quickly replaced by blatant greed.

She tried to pull him down onto her as soon as the last of her clothes had been stripped from her, but he shook his head.

She had started this, and he wanted her to see it through to its end.

Now he was the one who pushed ideas through the Force, reveling in the way her eyes widened, and her pupils dilated. Her cheeks were pink, but she licked her lips and nodded eagerly.

He grabbed her face and kissed her roughly before guiding her onto her hands and knees on the bed in front of him.

He slid his fingers into her, unsurprised to find her already wet and welcoming. She whined and wiggled.

“Are you sore?” He knew he had taken her for the first time less than 2 days ago.

She nodded jerkily, confirming his suspicions.

He leaned forward, pressing himself against the entrance to her body. “Good,” he whispered, driving into her in one hard and ruthless motion.

She cried out and he felt the pleasure that ripped through her. It was edged with pain, but she pushed back against him, begging for more.

He knew she would be this way, wild and uncontained, but feeling it for himself was enough to snap the little self-control that remained.

He pounded into her again and again, each thrust harder and more brutal than the last. His fingers dug into her hips and bruises were already springing to life on her flesh.

He gave himself to the moment, lost in the overwhelming connection of the bond, which had opened between them so completely that they felt like one being, and the shared darkness of their desires.

When his climax came, he rode his own knife’s edge between pleasure and pain, sharing it with her as her own pleasure echoed and amplified his own.

He emptied himself into her, pushing himself as deeply as possible into the woman who was the closest thing he had ever found to a home.

He crawled onto the bed next to her and pulled her into his arms. He was absolutely spent of all energy and emotion.

He had given everything he had to her.

He dozed comfortably for a while before her small voice cut through the silence.

“I was with you because I chose to be.”

He turned his head and found her looking at him with hurt in her eyes. His heart lurched inside his chest.

“Because I love you despite my better judgment and your ridiculous stubborn adherence to the First Order,” she continued, holding his gaze earnestly. “I am betraying everything I believe in and people who care about me every time I’m with you and I can’t stop doing it because I want you too much.”

“Your mother,” she spat the words at him in newly reawakened rage, “knows nothing about you, the bond, or anything that happened in the throne room or after that between us. I shouldn’t even be here but I’m here anyway. I slept with you anyway.  _ I’m in love with you anyway. _ ”

The first pang of guilt shot through him, and he moved away from her, standing and pulling his pants up before walking a few paces away.

He couldn’t think when she looked at him like that.

She sat up, pulling the sheet up over her body. “How do you even think that I could hide something like that from you? With the way the bond works between us? You feel everything I have inside me with I’m you. Can’t you feel the love, Ben?”

She pushed it through the bond, flooding his mind with the depth of her feelings for him. She felt everything for him that he felt for her.

There was a pure desperate need to be together and a feeling that she wasn’t truly home when she was anywhere else.

He had felt echoes of it before, enough to believe her when she said she loved him, but not enough to drown out the years of Snoke’s manipulations.

This was different, she poured it into him with such focus that he knew he would never be able to deny it again.

The strength of her feelings was overwhelming.

His doubts crumbled in the face of it.

He sank to his knees. “I’m sorry. Rey…I…” He couldn’t finish it, couldn’t think of any way to apologize to her for the accusation he had thrown in her face.

Once again, while he reveled in her darkness, he had hurt her with his own.

She genuinely loved him, but he also knew it was based on a false hope. She loved him as Ben and he had allowed it, but there was more to him than that. A darkness that lay inside him.

He knew she hoped he would someday overcome it, just as he knew he never could. This incident had reconfirmed it for him.

“Ben,” she walked forward, trailing his sheets behind her, and wrapped her arms around him, pulling him in until his head rested on her stomach and his arms were gripping tightly around her legs, “what happened? You were so happy yesterday and now this? What made you think I would do that to you?”

He hesitated. He had never told anyone about Snoke’s voice in his mind. They already feared him, and he knew how much worse that would have made it.

He looked up at Rey’s face and saw her gazing down at him with concern. She already knew so much about him, had already accepted him far more than anyone else had ever done.

If she was to truly love him, he had to show her the truth of him. She would have to accept all of him, and the risk of being with him when these things lived inside his mind.

“It’s a long story,” he began. “Can I show you?”

She nodded, understanding his intention to share his memories with her through the connection.

He closed his eyes and focused on the first time he remembered hearing Snoke’s voice in his head, he had been just a child. His mother was leaving for the day and he didn’t want her to go.

_ If she loved you, she wouldn’t leave you here alone like this. _

He heard Rey’s gasp of surprise but pushed on.

Now he was older, listening to his parents argue about him. He heard his mother whispering that she was frightened of the strength of his power, the depth of his anger. He cried quietly, smothering his sobs in his pillow.

_ She thinks you’re a monster. What kind of mother thinks such things about her son? _

Now he was ten and his parents were leaving him at Luke’s temple. He knew it was because they were scared of him and he begged them to let him stay with them, promised them he would do better.

Han looked at him, clearly struggling, and for one brief moment he thought his father would take him home but then Han had turned away and boarded the Falcon with Leia.

_ Your father is weak. Your mother doesn’t want you and he is too cowardly to stand up for you. _

The images started to tumble faster now.

The jealousy of Luke’s other students and Snoke’s assurances that it was because he was special.

Luke also beginning to be hesitant around him because of the strength of his power and the times he couldn’t control his emotions.

Snoke warned him that some day Luke would turn on him.

He showed her the night he woke up to Luke standing over him, lightsaber in hand. The way the temple had exploded in front of him and his tears.

Being chased off the planet by other students that he had grown up with who didn’t believe him.

He had fled to Snoke, fearing Leia and his father wouldn’t believe him, either.

He showed her Snoke’s escalating violence and how the darkness inside him pushed further toward the surface every day until he had become convinced there was no way out.

He skipped forward, now, giving her quick glimpses of his memories of her so that she would know that time had passed.

He showed her the death of Snoke and his panic and pain when the voice had returned.

Then the way it had crawled inside his mind to prey on his insecurities during the meeting.

“You still hear him? How is that even….? Oh, Ben, I’m so sorry.” She was hugging him he realized, her body wrapped around him as though she could protect him.

He felt her mind working, trying to piece the story together with all its implications. “If it was all Snoke’s manipulation from the beginning…does your mother know about any of this? Does anyone? You won’t come home because you are afraid of what your mother will say but all of this…”

He shook his head, rejecting the idea. She didn’t understand the depth of the dark inside him.

She had been there when he had murdered his father, but she didn’t understand it personally.

She was wholly attributing it to Snoke, not understanding that it was simply a part of him that couldn’t be exorcised.

“Look at me,” she grabbed his chin in her hand, forced him to meet her eyes. There was love there, but she was clearly struggling to contain her bafflement. “Why won’t you come home?”

He stood up, walked a few paces away from her.

She was right, they needed to deal with this, neither of them could live between their two worlds forever.

He looked at her, saw the confusion on her face, and knew she wanted to understand but wasn’t quite there yet.

He raked his hands through his hair as he struggled to find a way to explain it.

“I can’t go home. Not even if my mother would allow it, because she wants something I can’t give. She wants to see me free of darkness and I can’t give her that.”

He looked at her, begging her to try and see the truth.

“Even if I left the First Order and took up the Solo name again those dark urges would still be inside me. And someone like Hux would just take my place, which would not be an improvement for the Resistance, I assure you.”

She frowned at the mention of Hux and he knew she didn’t have an answer for that problem, but still shook her head emphatically. “That’s not true. Your mother loves you! They can accept you, just like I accepted you,” she emphasized.

“What you want from me is not so much different than what she wants. Do you love all of me, or just the parts you think of as Ben Solo?” he challenged her softly, but pointedly.

She paused and he knew she was thinking of Han and the things that had happened at the Battle of Crait.

“There are some things that you’ve done as Kylo that I can’t forget, but those were caused by Snoke’s manipulation of you. They weren’t caused by your own desires or your own hatred. They wouldn’t have happened without his shadow in your mind increasing and feeding what was naturally inside you.”

She held up a hand when he started to argue. “Everyone has some dark in them and I know you think that I can’t relate, that I can’t accept all of you unless I join you on the dark side but that isn’t true.”

“Ben, there is darkness in me, too.” She hesitated before continuing. “I attacked Luke the night he tore down my hut on Ahch- to. I confronted him about trying to hurt you at the Jedi temple.”

His jaw dropped. “You did  _ what?” _

She shrugged, as though it wasn’t a big deal, while his mind reeled with the implications. No one in his life had ever fought for him before.

“He lied to me the first time he told me about what happened, told me that when you woke up, he was just looking for darkness in your mind. I wanted him to admit what he did to you. I attacked him with my staff and when he knocked it out of my hand, I pulled his own lightsaber on him.”

“Are you out of your mind? He could have hurt you, killed you!” Images of Luke standing over him with a lightsaber in hand flashed through his mind.

He had done that to his own nephew, what might he have done to Rey? The thought terrified him to his core.

She shrugged again, and though she didn’t look afraid she did look a little ashamed. “He wasn’t trying to hurt me. He was an old man who was ashamed of what he had done, and I hit him and knocked him down because I was angry.”

He frowned, Luke may have been ashamed, but not enough to tell Rey or Leia the truth.

She rushed on, as though sensing that his thoughts and focused on Luke’s betrayal, looking at him with pain in her eyes. “I haven’t told Leia, or anybody, but it’s important to me that you know that I wanted to hurt him because of what he did to you. I understand the urge to lash out.”

He rocked back on his heels, contemplating her, and spoke quietly. “But you didn’t hurt him. You didn’t let it get that far. I know Snoke was in my head, feeding the darkness, but the darkness was there. He didn’t create it and he didn’t create my family’s fear of it. That shadow was always inside me.”

“No one expects you not to have one,” she insisted. “We all have one! Your mother wouldn’t turn you away any more than I have. Not any more than she turned me away.”

“You love me,” he retorted. “More than she ever did, apparently, because she did send me away, didn’t she?”

She huffed at him and he raised a brow at her, exasperated. “And  _ you  _ are still able to hide the darkness inside you from them. I can’t. I have so much more of it than you have, and you said yourself that you haven’t told my mother about Luke or about me.”

He paused and watched her wince at the truth of his words. “You are trapped with them, playing pretend that you are the perfect light Jedi, because they won’t accept you for all of yourself.”

“Aren’t you just as trapped here?” She demanded, waving her arms around at a room he knew she couldn’t see. “Pretending to be devoid of empathy and compassion? Rampaging across the galaxy?”

Now it was his turn to wince. “Yes, but at least here I fight for myself and not someone else. Not anymore. And,” he added, “I am as far away from Jedi nonsense as possible, which is an indisputable bonus.”

She frowned and shifted uncomfortably, pulling the sheet up to cover herself more fully. “Leia said it’s forbidden for a Jedi to love. She told me that she didn’t train as a Jedi because she was in love with Han and she didn’t want to give that up.”

She looked at him, and he felt his heart drop at her conflicted expression. “She’s offered to help teach me the little she did get from her training with Luke.”

He frowned and reached out a hand, reassured when she accepted it without hesitation. “She’s right about one thing. You need a teacher. But please don’t let it be the Jedi. They will ask you to put aside all of your heart and your passion, everything that makes you beautiful, and turn you into something unfeeling and pious.”

She didn’t argue immediately, which surprised him enough that he stepped closer to her, pressing his point.

“You can bring your ridiculous Jedi books here if you must, but let me tell you the other stories, too. The stories about the hurt they caused and the pain. There is more to life than the Jedi and the Sith. I meant what I said on the  _ Supremacy _ . We can let old things die and make something new together.”

She sighed deeply and he felt hope spring to life inside him. “Luke said nearly the same thing to me. That it was time for the Jedi to end, that their legacy was failure. It must mean something that I have gotten the same message from the last living people who carry the legacies of the light and the dark side of the Force.”

“Of course,” she smiled at him and tucked a piece of hair behind his ear, “it may also help that I really don’t want to give you up to become a Jedi. I fully understand Leia’s choice to not seek to attain full Jedi status.”

He grabbed her hand, placed a kiss to her wrist. “The Jedi were blinded by their views on love. They obsessed about the ways that attachment might lead a Jedi to fear and didn’t see that it was a form of fear in itself.”

There was a ripple in the Force, and a voice spoke that Kylo had never heard before. Rey’s lips parted in surprise and he knew this time it wasn’t in his head.

She heard it, too.

“Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering…” the voice trailed away, leaving them both in shock.

“I’ve heard that voice before. The first time I touched Luke’s saber on Takodana. I heard voices and saw visions of the past. My parents leaving me, Luke fighting Darth Vader…And visions of the future. I saw you.”

He was still processing that she had the ability to use psychometry when he realized she said she had seen him, too.

“In the rain while I was with the Knights of Ren? And in the forest on Starkiller Base?”

She nodded, clearly surprised.

“I saw you,” he said simply. “But for me those moments were years apart, not minutes. I don’t understand how any of this is happening, but there is clearly something bigger at work here. The Force doesn’t work like this, not that I have seen or heard of in all of my training. Not on the dark side or the light.”

He leaned into her, wrapped his arms around her waist. “Come to me, please. Let me keep you safe while we figure all of this out. You can bring your books and anything else you want…Please, sweetheart.”

He could feel her hesitate, the rise of temptation pulsing through the bond, and he can’t help but hope. Maybe this time…

“What would happen to the Resistance? I care about those people.”

He opened his mouth to tell her that he would order them not be harmed, that he would wipe the planet they are hiding on, the whole system, off of every map in the First Order and give it to the Resistance as a gift if it made her happy.

A loud beep interrupted him before he could speak and Hux’s irritating voice drifted through the com. “Supreme Leader?”

“I told you I didn’t wish to be interrupted!” he snarled, spinning toward the place beside the door that the voice was coming from.

“You did, sir. But the Knights of Ren have returned.”

“I don’t care! Now go away!”

Hux held the line open just long enough to ensure that his sigh was audible before severing the connection and returning the room to silence. Kylo turned around, only to discover Rey was gone. Leaving just a pool of fabric in the floor where she had dropped his sheet.

He hesitated, unsure what to do. She had been so close to agreeing to come to him and part of him wanted to reach out and pull her back. But something was indeed happening in the Force, and it seemed that Snoke might have had at least some answers to that.

He tugged on his clothing, pulling on his gloves as he walked out of the room. The Knights of Ren might have the answers that he and Rey needed, and he had to find out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a heavy and emotional chapter for me. I feel like they had a lot to work through that kept these early chapters focused on their feelings. As the story progresses there will be more action and more involvement from the other characters!
> 
> In this chapeter we needed to explore Rey's feral complexity and the real reasons why Ben feels he can't go home to his mother. He makes some good points about the expectations of the Jedi and his bitterness toward them.


	7. Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There are no secrets that time does not reveal.- Jean Racine

Early morning was Rey’s favorite time on Ajan Kloss. The jungle around them was always rippling with life, but the rising of the sun brought the first chirp of exotic birdsong and the revelation of a green world that she was sure would always take her breath away.

The morning after she had nearly joined Ben found her awake early, curled on her small bed and nibbling contentedly at some small strange fruit that the others had assured her was edible even though the skin was covered in ugly black spikes. Beneath that frightening exterior the flesh was soft and sweet tasting, bursting with juice and lightness that delighted the tongue.

It was her favorite of the plentiful foods available on this new planet. She seemed to be always eating, never able to really convince herself that a plentiful supply of food would always be there for her.

Once the sun had fully risen, she planned to sneak away from the others and spend some time in her favorite mediation spot. It overlooked a beautiful little waterfall and the sound of the water crashing against the rocks had already become one of her favorite sounds.

She was hoping for answers. The voice from her visions had spoken clearly to her and Ben, seeming to support the idea of her going to him and creating a new order, but she was still hesitant despite her longing to be with him. The others would never understand it and would view her as a traitor to their cause.

She cared for them and the idea of losing them was a painful one.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a quick ripple in the Force and Ben striding toward her he appeared from nowhere.

He looked worried and was obviously dressed for travel. He was wearing his cloak and gloves and had his lightsaber hanging from his hip.

He sank down on the side of her bed and she smiled at him uncertainly.

“Is everything alright?”

“Yes, I…” He stopped and his gaze swept over her. “You’ve got new clothes.”

“Oh, yes. Finally! My others were worn getting very worn. Do you like it? I went with mostly white this time.”

He nodded before leaning in to place a quick kiss on her lips. “You are always beautiful. The color suits you, though I would prefer to see you in black.”

“I know,” she bit her lip, feeling certain that he was going to ask her again and not knowing what her answer would be.

“Rey, I need to talk to you.” He ran his hands through his hair, a clear indication of stress and upset from him, and she was immediately alert. Something was definitely wrong.

She reached for his hand, scooting closer to him on the bed and willing him to take whatever comfort he could from her presence. “I’m listening.”

He shook his head again, perplexed, before pulling her in for another quick and hungry kiss. “No one has ever loved me as much as you do.” He was staring at her with something that seemed close to awe.

It was heartbreaking, to realize how much he was touched by simple empathy and someone that was willing to listen to him.

“I wish I could stay. I swear I could stay in this bed with you all day and you’d need another set of new clothes, but there are things happening right now that need my attention. Things that I need you to be aware of, so you can keep yourself safe.”

“The First Order?” She was surprised. She thought he would have had the authority to give an order to change things if the First Order was putting her in danger.

“It isn’t me,” he said, feeling her confusion. “The Knights of Ren have uncovered evidence that Snoke was involved in things that I wasn’t aware of. It’s not surprising, he would hardly have trusted Hux or me with all of his secrets, for obvious reasons.”

She winced at the guilt that rolled through her, but he chuckled.

“Don’t you dare feel bad that we killed him,” he admonished. “He deserved it. But these secrets seem to be more threatening than I expected and I’m not sure what kind of an impact it might have on the Resistance, or the First Order for that matter.”

She wanted to ask, but she didn’t want to press him to reveal information about the First Order. It was part of their agreement.

“I’m leaving the Finalizer and taking the Knights of Ren to the edge of the Unknown Regions. We have to pursue the information that they discovered on the remains of the _ Supremacy _ . I won’t have much privacy, so I don’t think I’ll be able to come to you while I’m gone, and I won’t be able to protect you if the Resistance is discovered. Wherever you are, Rey, you need to stay hidden and lay low. Absolutely no daring heroics.”

Her grip tightened on his fingers. He was leaving her, and it was one of her greatest fears. What if he never came back? What if something happened.

“How long will you be gone?” She was shaking and he noticed immediately, lifting her hand to his lips and pressing a kiss to her knuckles.

“I’m not sure. I don’t know exactly what we are going to find there. Snoke spent a lot of time communicating with someone, and I don’t know what their reaction is going to be when they find out he isn’t the one in charge anymore.”

She nodded, but she felt numb. Everything seemed terribly far away and disconnected.

“Here, eat this. You look pale.” He took the fruit from her hand and held it up to her lips, but she shook her head. She knew she couldn’t possibly swallow it.

He frowned but popped it into his own mouth instead.

He didn’t seem to realize what he had done, but Rey felt her mouth fall open in shock.

“Ben! You just ate my fruit!”

His brows drew together at her tone. “You said you didn’t want it!”

She gently slapped his arm, “No, that was here, with me! You took it from me, here, and brought it to you!”

He frowned. They had interacted with each other and to an extent with each other’s environments, before. Nothing to this extent, though. He had brought part of her space into his own. Passed it across the galaxy with ease.

“That’s useful, I guess. I don’t understand how any of this is happening.”

She shrugged. “Neither do I, but if it continues, I wonder what else we might be able to do?”

Not surprisingly, he grinned at the thought. He had been fascinated by the technical aspects of the bind since it began. “Maybe I’ll be able to just pull  _ you _ through the bond.”

He looked over her shoulder suddenly and his smile faded. When he looked back at her, she felt her own sadness echo through the bond. He didn’t want to leave her, anymore than she wanted to be left.

“It’s time for me to go. I’ll come back for you, sweetheart, I promise.”

She nodded helplessly, reaching for him to desperately tangle her fingers in his hair and crush his mouth to her own. She poured all of her hope into him and made a quick wish that the Force would keep him safe.

When she let go of him, she could barely see through the blur of tears, but she could feel the absence of him in the Force.

She wiped her eyes and stood up and decided that she needed some room to breathe before the rest of the Resistance woke up and started piling demands and expectations on her.

She snuck quickly and quietly through the jungle until the sound of the waterfall reached her ears. She followed it blindly, unable to see through the tears still coursing down her cheeks.

When she finally settled into her now familiar spot at its base, she pulled her head into her knees and let the tears flow freely.

She cried for Ben, for the manipulation and pain and loneliness he had lived with all his life. She cried for the war-torn galaxy and the lives that were lost. She cried for herself. For her fear of losing the ones she loved, of being alone again, of being powerless in her destiny.

Her heart was painfully divided and she didn’t know how much more she could take.

She didn’t know how long she stayed there before all her tears ran out and she looked around, wiping the last of the wetness from her cheeks.

“Rey?” The voice was unwelcome, she didn’t want to have to lie to cover the reason for her tears, but Rose sounded concerned.

“I’m here,” she called, and Rose soon stepped into sight, sighing with relief when she spotted Rey sitting beside the falls.

Rose too had new clothes, a comfortable uniform that allowed her to be at ease while working on the Resistance ships, and a new hairstyle. The cute flips of her hair were gone. They had been smoothed back into a bun at the nape of her neck.

Leia was leaning heavily on Rose for her mechanical expertise, and between that and a steadily deepening relationship with Finn, her confidence had risen exponentially over the past few weeks.

She was changed and looked more like a competent woman with each passing day.

She frowned as she got closer, clearly noticing the evidence of tears on Rey’s face.

“Alright,” she said firmly, dropping to sit next to Rey on the grass. “Time to spill. You’ve been so emotional lately and I know something is going on with you. What is it?”

Rey said nothing, though she did reach for Rose’s hand to give it a light squeeze. She hated worrying Rose, but how could she begin to explain that though she loved them all and she disagreed fundamentally with many things the First Order had done, she felt as though her true belonging was at the side of the man who was now in charge of it? That her tears were largely born of fear for his safety?

Rose bumped her shoulder against Rey’s, a bit forcefully. “I mean it! You’ve been hiding something and as your friend I have to insist that you share it, because it’s obviously bothering you. That’s what friends do.”

Rey wouldn’t know. She’s never had friends until she joined the Resistance and it seemed as though her secrets about Ben had begun almost as soon as she met them. She had always been hiding things away from everyone but him and even then, it was only because she the bond wouldn’t let her keep anything to herself.

She had little time to think but knew she had to decide how much she could safely say while soothing her friend’s concern.

“I’m just having a bit of a problem,” she began carefully, not looking at Rose and pretending to have a great fascination with watching the birds flying around the falls.

Rose nodded, “Yes, I’ve worked that out for myself.” She smiled anyway at Rey’s sad attempt and gave a small wave of her fingers. “Go on! What’s the problem? No need to be shy. You help me with all of mine!”

Rey took a deep breath. “It’s kind of a Force problem. Maybe some kind of Jedi stuff.”

“Oh,” Rose sighed, clearly disappointed. “Well, then maybe you should talk to Leia! She knows about Force stuff. At least some from being around Luke, right?”

Rey winced. “I don’t think it’s the kind of problem Leia could help me with. It’s a Force problem, but it’s also not really about the Force at all. It’s a person problem…a specific person.”

She looked away from the birds when Rose didn’t answer, to find her new friend smiling at her with wide eyes.

“It’s a guy, right? You’re having guy problems! Who is it?” She moved closer to Rey, smiling conspiratorially. This was girl talk, Rey realized, somewhat amused and somewhat horrified.

Rose’s excitement was palpable and easily sensed through just her facial features. The extra bump that she got from feeling it through the Force just made her feel even more guilty that she couldn’t share everything with her friend.

“Ah, well, he’s a guy. Not one you know, though, so…hmm.”

Rose’s smile turned to puzzlement and she tilted her head and looked curiously at Rey.

“How would you meet a guy that I don’t know? There are still very few of us here?” Then her eyes sharpened with suspicion and Rey’s heart nearly stopped beating.

“Is it Poe? Is that why you don’t want me to know who it is?” Rey made a face and Rose giggled. “Okay, so I should have known it wasn’t Poe.”

“You really don’t know him,” Rey insisted. “He isn’t here at all. That’s the Force part of the problem. It’s connecting me to someone from far away. I didn’t want it at first but now…now I do.”

“Oh,” Rose squeezed her fingers. “It’s serious then. I know that look. That’s exactly how I feel about Finn.”

Rey nodded, swallowing back fresh tears even though she had been sure she was all out of them after crying so hard.

“Does he not want to join the Resistance? He could come here! We could go and get him!” Rose was trying so hard to help but Rey’s tears were now mixed with strangled laughter.

“No, we can’t go get him. Stars, Rose, it’s all so ridiculous. He isn’t my friend, or yours. He’s part of the First Order!”

Rose’s concerned look turned to stone. “The First Order?”

Rey nodded, completely unable to stop the tears even as the laughter faded at the look on her friend’s face. It was just all too much.

“You’ve been using the Force to talk to some guy in the First Order? And you didn’t tell anyone, not even Leia?” Rose’s voice was flat and Rey could feel the waves of confusion and betrayal rolling off her.

“Not on purpose,” she said quickly. “It wasn’t something I asked for, it just happened. Neither of us wanted this at all, we just couldn’t make it stop. But everything was happening with Starkiller Base and Luke, and then it was Crait and coming here.”

She tipped her head back, taking a deep shuddering breath to try and calm her nerves.

“By the time it seemed like it might be the right time to say something, there was so much to explain that it was impossible!”

Rose was still watching her carefully with a blank expression. “I don’t know what to say. The First Order is our enemy, so this guy is the enemy, right?”

Rey knew she was trying but her hate for the First Order ran deep. She was angry at them, rightfully so, for what happened to her home planet, and for the bombing run that had killed her sister. She blamed them and that blame would fall on any member of the First Order.

Any hope Rey had felt that there might be a place for her to turn for help evaporated in the face of Rose’s anger.

She loved the Resistance, and they were good people who would fight to the death for what was right, but Ben had known all along that they wouldn’t accept him.

They might be willing to look the other way on Leia’s orders, but he would never be welcome.

Rey pressed a hand to her eyes, feeling the split in her heart widen. One deep breath. Two. Three.

She opened her eyes and smiled at Rose. “Of course, I know that and that’s why I have decided not to talk to him anymore. I gave him a chance and he turned me down. It just hurt my feelings.”

Rose pressed her lips together. “That’s all you can expect from the First Order. They’re all cowards.”

Rey hugged her tightly before rising and offering her a helping hand getting to her own feet. “Let’s get some breakfast!” She infused as much false cheer into her voice as she could, and Rose seemed willing to let the matter drop now that Rey was seemingly back on the right side of things.

Rey waited until they were nearly back to the Falcon before she broke the silence between them. “Can we…just maybe not mention this to anyone else? It’s really embarrassing!” She waited, holding her breath, until Rose nodded pleasantly.

“I don’t think Finn and Poe would be too pleased about it anyway.”

Rey forgot about breakfast as she watched Rose run off to join Poe and Finn. Rose looked happy and comfortable with them in a way she herself wasn’t. Even Finn was far more likely to seek out them than he was her these days.

There was a clear line of separation between them, despite the care she had for them. Somewhere in her heart something settled and some of the tension she was carrying around inside her was able to relax.

They belonged together. They understood each other on a level that she couldn’t, but it no longer made her feel left out. They weren’t her home.

Her home was with Ben.

That was where her belonging was. She had felt it the moment she had first seen his face, she just didn’t understand it.

They had problems that they would need to work out, compromises to reach, but she had faith that they could do it. He loved her enough to not hurt the ones she cared about, no matter how he felt about them, and she loved him enough to not pressure him to return to the Jedi and the Resistance.

He would forge his own path, and she would be with him.

“Rey!” She turned and found Leia waving at her, standing next to a man she had never seen before. There were new faces arriving on Ajan Kloss daily now, preparing to fight the First Order, so it was nothing new for Leia to want to introduce her to a newcomer.

His name was Beaumont Kim, and he was a small man with a scruff of beard and dark blond hair. His smile was friendly, and she liked him immediately.

Leia made the introductions quickly, eager to get to the real reason she had summoned Rey to her side. “Beaumont worked in academia before all of this began with the First Order. He is fluent in languages and culture. I wanted to make sure that you were introduced to him as soon as possible because he might be able to help you with the translations of your Jedi books!”

Again, she pasted a polite smile on her face, but Rey knew immediately that she didn’t like him that much. Those texts were for her and Ben.

Still she couldn’t be rude.

“Yes, of course, we should work on that once you are settled in and comfortable. Well, as comfortable as possible.”

She wouldn’t be here though, she knew now. She would be with Ben, convincing him to change the First Order’s policies so they didn’t need to fight.

That was the answer, she realized. The path that the two of them could lay to avoid more death and more destruction. He already held most of the galaxy, she just needed to help him be a just ruler that the people would want to follow. There would be no need for the Resistance to fight a just government, even if it had begun in violence under Snoke’s leadership.

It was that simple, that complicated, and might save every person in this base if it never came down to a fight between them and the First Order.

She went through the rest of her day in a haze, mind whirling as she tried to figure out how to make her plan work.

She just needed Ben to come back from wherever he had gone so she could go to him. She didn’t have a clue where the Finalizer was, and even if she did it didn’t seem like a food idea to show up unannounced when Ben wasn’t there.

It would be hard enough for him to explain her presence even when he was there.

The next several days passed much the same. She ate, she smiled, she talked with the others and made the necessary arrangements to house the newcomers that were arriving every day. She prayed to the Force that the love she shared with Ben would be enough to prevent further bloodshed. That he would agree to her plan.

It was the third day when it happened. She was meditating by the falls when the Force drug her under and pulled her into an experience that she immediately understood was somewhere between a vision and a Force connection.

She could see Ben, but he couldn’t see or sense her.

He was dressed exactly as he had been the last time she had seen him and he was surrounded by tall men in black clothing and frightening masks. She had seen them before, in other visions. They must be the Knights of Ren, she realized, remembering Ben had mentioned taking them with him. That probably had something to do with Ben taking the name Kylo Ren, though if there was a connection, no one had bothered to explain it to her.

They were standing on what appeared to be the bridge of a star destroyer, and Ben was talking to a man in a First Order uniform. He was older than Ben and emanated a feeling of ruthless, though currently nervous, authority.

Something about that man was wrong, though she couldn’t quite figure out exactly what it was. Ben shouldn’t trust him, and she wasn’t sure if he was able to feel the man’s treachery or if it was only evident in her own vision.

She snapped back to herself and the vision faded. She pressed the memory of the man’s face into her mind. She wouldn’t forget him. The Force wanted her to know that he was dangerous and she wouldn’t let go of that message.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope that everyone is enjoying the better relationships between the Resistance members.
> 
> We deserved to see Rey and Rose have a great friendship, and they will get the rest of the way there but there is still a lot to work out for these characters. 
> 
> For me the Trio of this trilogy will always be Finn, Poe, and Rose so I wanted us to begin to see that dynamic mature as Rey steps further into her own unique path with Ben.
> 
> Also please drop a comment and talk to me if you are enjoying this story! Nobody ever talks to me on this story and it is my best and longest one!


	8. Leap of Faith

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We must live in faith and not by fear- Elder Quentin L. Cook

Kylo looked at Allegiant General Pryde with thinly veiled disdain. He was standing on the bridge of the ship that was under Pryde’s command. A First Order ship, but one that had not appeared on any of the official records or flight logs.

It didn’t seem possible and was a violation of all First Order protocols, yet here they were.

The man was perfectly civil as Kylo went through another round of inquiries about his command and the orders he had been given by Snoke, but the undercurrents of his emotions reminded Kylo strongly of General Hux.

He was the kind to lie and scheme his way to power, and though he had welcomed Kylo aboard his ship, the feeling on board the  _ Steadfast,  _ was not exactly one of welcome.

Being the Supreme Leader seemed to be multiplying his enemies at an alarming rate.

He wished viciously that Rey was with him. He trusted her as he trusted no one else to help him evaluate the situation and decide what to do. She would be honest, and she had no ulterior motives, no plots for power or personal gain.

He felt her presence, a brush against his mind that lasted only long enough to help steady him before it was gone.

Reserve command forces was Pryde’s explanation. Set up by Snoke in case they were to become needed. Kept separate so they would not become a target for Republic or Resistance forces.

It was logical, practical even. It was also a partial truth, one which Kylo could sense but not quite unravel. It would need to be dealt with, but for now he needed the resources that Pryde could offer him, so he would bide his time.

Watch, listen, and see what there was to discover about this man and his relevance to Snoke. Pryde was another First Order commander that had once been part of the Imperial forces of the Empire under Palpatine. It was a connection that would be unwise to ignore.

“Your reserve Forces are needed if the galaxy is truly to fall to the First Order. You will join other forces in the Mid Rim immediately, and fully integrate your records with those of the rest of the Order.”

“Of course, I will inform the commanders of all the reserve ships to report to the locations you provide for us.”

Pryde’s smile didn’t reach his eyes as he continued, “How much progress has there been in the First Order’s conquest of the galaxy since the _ unfortunate _ death of our Lord Snoke?”

Kylo didn’t rise to the bait as he once would have done. His rage no longer simmered so close to the surface that it overpowered his common sense, which he supposed he owed to Rey and the connection they shared.

She had soothed so much of his hurt and his anger simply by believing him and loving him despite what he had become.

“We have encountered small pockets of resistance that were easily dealt with,” he explained calmly. “Your presence is merely a necessary show of force. Enough dreadnoughts throughout the galaxy prevents rebellious thoughts from manifesting into open warfare in systems that are already under our control.”

Kylo turned, prepared to return to his shuttle. He had made an abrupt departure from the  _ Finalizer  _ and he needed to return as quickly as possible before Hux had time to cause too much trouble in his absence.

“As quickly as possible, General,” he reiterated.

“Yes, of course,” Pryde replied.

Kylo paused, waited silently until Pryde spoke again

“Supreme Leader Ren.”

Kylo nodded and walked briskly from the room, cape billowing from the movement and Knights of Ren close behind.

Pryde wasn’t happy about his position as Supreme Leader, but the reserve forces were small compared to the size of the main component of the First Order. He would follow orders, and once their records were integrated within the system, Kylo would have access to them.

Then he could begin to dig into the general’s secrets and find out what else Snoke had been hiding from them.

The pilot of his command shuttle was quick to jump them back into hyperspace once they were all on board, showing even more brisk efficiency than usual. It seemed that even without Force sensitivity she was uncomfortable with the members of the reserve Forces.

It would be a long trip back to the _ Finalizer _ , currently hovering over a planet in the Mid Rim, from their current position so close to the Unknown Regions, so Kylo settled into a chair to wait. The sleep cycle wouldn't begin for several more hours.

The Knights of Ren soon joined him, bickering impatiently amongst themselves.He could feel their irritation, and he sighed. Another problem, then, that he would have to solve.

He waited for one of them to say something, not lowering himself to their level and joining in on the arguing. They needed to know that he was still firmly in control.

Unsurprisingly, Cardo was the first to speak. He had always lacked the precision and control of the others and tended to use a more direct approach to handling problems. “You should have just let us kill him,” he muttered.

Kylo turned, staring languidly into the other man’s helmet covered face. So familiar to him after all these years. He didn't need to be able to see Cardo’s eyes to understand his mind.

“Do you think so?” he asked quietly.

Cardo nodded, as did Ushar and Vicrul.

“It would have given us something to do,” Trudgen complained. “A whole war was happening and all we’ve done is hunt through Snoke’s wreck of a ship looking for datapads and old records! We haven’t gotten to burn anything in weeks!”

“Missed the whole battle of Crait,” added Kuruk bitterly.

Kylo nodded. He understood their frustration. The darkness pulling restlessly on you and urging you to act. “I felt his deception, but I need his forces. If he isn’t loyal to me or the First Order, then you can kill him.”

It seemed a simple enough solution to the problem, but they weren’t satisfied. They bickered again for several minutes before reluctantly accepting that there was no killing on the agenda for the day.

Irritated silence filled the room again.

Ap’lek spoke for the first time. “You still haven’t repaired your helmet.”

It was a quiet observation, but a pointed accusation. Ap’lek was the quietest of his knights, the one least likely to contribute to any conversation, and Kylo knew that if he was speaking on an issue, that he spoke for all of them.

Wearing a helmet was a requirement for the Knights of Ren. It had been since the group was led by the original Ren. A man Kylo had killed to get to his current position of leadership.

“No, I haven’t,” Kylo looked at them all, stoic and unaffected by the reminder. “I am the leader of the Knights of Ren, but I am also Supreme Leader of the First Order. People need to see my face. There will be no more helmet.”

If they had any objections to this, they didn’t voice them and Kylo soon left the room to retreat to his private bedchamber.

He was tempted to reach out to Rey, but he knew there was a good chance the knights would be able to hear him through the walls while he spoke to her or sense her presence in the Force from such a small distance.

The shuttle simply wasn’t big enough for privacy when there were this many people on board. Maybe he should have just taken the entirety of the  _ Finalize _ r on this journey instead of the smaller, more practical shuttle.

He changed out of his restricting travel clothes, spending a few minutes in the fresher to waste some extra time, and then laid on the bunk trying to will himself to sleep.

The sooner that he got back to her, the better he would feel. He wasn’t whole without her and somewhere in the back of his mind he was always afraid that she would change her mind and decide that he wasn’t good enough for her.

The trip took three Standard Days, and by the time he got back to the  _ Finalizer _ all he wanted was to see her, to make sure she was alright.

Hux stopped him as he stepped off the shuttle with a list of concerns that needed to be addressed, all of which had arisen in his temporary absence.

He sighed, changing his mind about heading for his bedchamber and walking to the throne room instead before wading into the list of complaints, orders to be given, and decisions that needed to be made.

It took hours to work through all of it.

He dismissed the other officers before revealing what he had discovered about the reserve forces and Allegiant General Pryde only to General Hux.

Hux was obviously torn between relief that they had replenished their forces and irritation that Snoke had hidden all of this from him.

Since that was exactly the same struggle Kylo was experiencing, the two men shared a quick glance where years of animosity and competition fell away and was replaced by a mutual understanding.

“Keep an eye on them,” Kylo muttered. “I don’t trust them.”

“You don’t trust me, either,” Hux reminded him.

Kylo shook his head, “No, I don’t. But I trust you more. You hate me, but your loyalty to the First Order is without question. I don’t know who these people are loyal to.”

Hux nodded stiffly, undeniably pleased to be put in charge of such an important task.

Kylo dismissed him and finally made his way to his own chambers.

It was already late, and he was exhausted, but as he stripped off his clothes and fell into bed, he wanted only one thing and with a quick ripple of the Force she appeared beside him.

She was already smiling when he pulled her into his arms.

“You’re safe,” she whispered, raining kisses over his face as she tangled her fingers into his hair. “I missed you, so much. I was so worried about you.”

“I missed you, too. I hated that I wasn’t able to see you.” He was already kissing his way down the delicate column of her neck, nipping softly at the most sensitive places just to hear her little gasps and moans.

Her fingers were gripping his shoulders as he rolled her beneath him. “Is anyone going to be looking for you soon?” he asked, and smiled when she shook her head.

“No, it’s still hours until morning.”

“Good,” he whispered, kissing her softly, soothing the desperate fire between them to a more manageable ache. He quickly stripped her of what little clothing she slept in.

He wanted her as viciously as he always did, but he also knew that they had rushed every time they had been together.

They had been so driven by emotion, so consumed by the visceral connection that they experienced when desire forced their bond wide open, that he hadn’t been able to slow down and properly show her how it could be between them.

He had hated every moment of knowing she was beyond his reach and he wanted to show her everything, to mark her so completely with memories of this night that she would never forget it.

She arched against him, trying to draw him into a more passionate embrace but he ran a soothing hand down her side.

“Patience, love, I’m not going anywhere. Let me take my time. I should have taken the time before.”

She whined and he knew it was going to be a challenge to get her to cooperate with his softer lovemaking plans.

She was his equal in every way, and she was just as greedy as he had ever been, just as passionate. The idea that she might have chosen to be a Jedi chilled him to his core.

Luke would have ruined her.

Kylo watched her eyes drift closed as his hand covered her breast. He had his own plans to ruin her, but his were much more pleasurable.

He brought his lips to her other breast, teasing the soft, pink nipple with tongue until she tangled her fingers in his hair and tugged in frustration. Only when she began to whine and protest in earnest did he give her what she needed and draw her nipple into his mouth.

She swore softly and he chuckled. He really loved to hear how she lost control of herself when he touched her. She had never let anything like that slip any other time, not even when they were trying to murder each other in a snowy forest.

She wiggled in several places as he nibbled a path down her stomach and discovered her ticklish spots. He wanted to learn every inch of her body, memorize her flesh as well as he knew his own. He could already map out every freckle on her face, had memorized the exact shade of hazel that matched her eyes.

But he wanted it all.

She tensed briefly as he pressed a kiss low on her stomach but relaxed as he worked his way down her right leg, giggling quietly as he brushed a sensitive place behind her knee and nearly knocking him off the bed with her foot when he tried to touch her toes.

He switched legs, careful to avoid her foot this time, and started to work his way back up her leg, drifting slowly up her inner thigh until she tried to press her legs together.

He shook his head, refusing to yield to the pressure she was exerting as she tried to nudge him out. “Absolutely not. You already did this for me, remember?”

She huffed, lifting herself up on her elbows to peer down at him, and he could feel the emotions that were at war within her. She was curious, but there was also a strong element of fear and shame.

It amazed him that she could have been so brazen about taking him into her mouth but so shy about letting him anywhere near her.

He wavered for a moment, then shifted until he was able to pull her into his arms. He needed her to be able to see him, so she would be able to judge for herself that he was being entirely honest. He knew she could feel it in the Force, but sometimes confirmation on multiple levels helped to establish more layers of trust.

He tipped her chin up until she was looking him in the eye.

“I will not do anything you really don’t want me to do, but I promise you that I would not ask you to let me do this if I didn’t want it.” She wrinkled her nose but he tapped her mouth with his finger to keep her from interrupting. “Do you remember how you felt when you knew that you were bringing me pleasure with your mouth? That is the same way that I feel about this.”

He gave her a little nudge with the Force, letting her feel the truth of his desire and sending her a quick mental image of what he imagined it would be like for him when she came apart under his mouth.

Her mouth parted slightly as the picture flitted through her mind and she nibbled her bottom lip with her teeth.

“Please,” he whispered, wondering what it was about her that made him instantly willing to humble himself as he would never have done for anyone else.

She was pink in the cheeks when she nodded, and he wanted to tease her about being embarrassed around him again, but knew it wasn’t the right time. He was going to make sure he had the rest of their lives to tease her and by the time he finished with her tonight she would never question again that he loved tasting every part of her.

She was still tense, but she didn’t object when he settled between her thighs, pressing a soft kiss to each of them in turn and then resting his cheek against her leg until she started to relax.

She jumped when he ran a single finger lightly down the center of her, and he wasn’t surprised to find her already wet with desire. She was always ready for him, always wanting. His own needs surged inside him, but he pushed them down. He wanted to do this for her.

He slid his finger into her folds, delighting in the slickness as he explored her. She shivered and shifted her hips, fingers twisting in the sheets. He circled his now wet finger against the sensitive bud that brought her such intense pleasure and she threw back her head with a guttural noise that sounded nearly like a growl.

He continued for as long as she let him, but it wasn’t long until she was begging him for release. Instead, he withdrew his finger and slid it inside her in one smooth, sudden motion.

She jerked her hips, moaning from the change in sensation. She was panting now, hips rolling against his hand as he slid another finger into her to join the first. His hand was soaked from her and he had to quickly push away thoughts of how incredible it was going to be when he was finally inside her.

She didn’t jump or jerk away from him when he finally pressed his mouth to her. She was drowning in desire, all of her concerns forgotten. She reached for him blindly, tangling her fingers in his hair, as he retraced the path of his fingers with his tongue.

The taste of her was sweet and intoxicating and he ran his tongue over all of her, swirling gently against the delicate nub before pressing inside her with barely restrained enthusiasm. Soon he could feel her vibrating with need beneath him. Her desperation had become a knife’s edge of feeling that hammered into him through the bond, lost somewhere between pleasure and pain.

When he lifted his head, she pulled him up, her natural strength enhanced by the Force as she drug him toward her mouth. She kissed him with unbridled hunger, and he felt the bond ripple with her quick jolt of surprise as she tasted herself on his lips, on his tongue. It was followed quickly by a dark and primitive thrill, the heady rush of possession.

She wrapped her legs around him, no longer able to be patient as she demanded more from him. He pushed inside her with a grateful moan, but she gave him no time to savor the tight welcome of her body, or the decadent wetness that eased his entrance and made her insides feel like heated silk.

She was moving beneath him, hands clutching desperately at his back, pulling insistently at his hips as she urged him on.

He had kept her hovering so close to the edge for so long that she was shattering around him in only a few thrusts. He dipped his head to swallow the cries that tore from her throat, worried that it would draw unwanted attention to her, but he didn’t stop moving inside her.

He was beyond that now, and the clenching of her body around him as she reached her own peak only enhanced his need for his own.

She clung to him as he kissed her, using one hand to hold her hips in place as he drove into her. Desperation increased his pace and his force and he worried vaguely that he might be hurting her, but the soft sounds that she was making and the pleasure that was humming from her end of the bond assured him that she was just as eager as he was.

The bond was soon rippling with increasing pleasure and he realized with surprise that she was heading toward a second peak already. He clenched his teeth and held off his own satisfaction until she slipped over the edge a second time and then he finally let himself go, emptying himself into her and calling her name as he discovered the true meaning of ecstasy.

Her arms and legs stayed wrapped around him as they both floated blissfully in the aftermath of their mutual destruction. Only when she started to wiggle beneath him did he remember that she couldn’t breathe under the weight of him and he finally shifted to lie next to her. She didn’t seem ready to lose the intimacy of their contact and scooted over him until she was draped half across him

She was beautiful, and he wanted to put that little satisfied half-smile on her face every day.

He lay there, trailing his fingers up and down her arm as she rested on his chest, for several peaceful minutes. Being next to her again filled the empty spaces inside him, and he didn’t want to think about the moment that the Force would disconnect them and having to spend another night alone.

He was surprised when she lifted her head and looked at him with determination on her face. He was sure she had been nearly asleep, but it seemed that she had been merely deep in thought and had reached a decision about something.

“Where are you, Ben?” she asked softly.

His heart skipped a full beat in his chest and his hand on her arm tightened reflexively.

“On the  _ Finalizer _ ,” he said, but of course she already knew that. She wouldn’t be asking him unless…

She raised a brow at him, which made him feel foolish, but he had asked her so many times to join him and been rejected. If she wanted to come to him, he needed to hear her say it.

“Where is the  _ Finalizer _ ?” she asked, pointedly this time.

He sat up abruptly, and she shifted as the sudden movement knocked her off his chest. “Are you…”

She nodded, a small smile playing at the corners of her mouth, and it took everything he had not to crush his mouth to hers out of pure joy.

“Why? What changed?” Part of him wondered if it really mattered, if maybe her being with him was enough, but another part knew that it did matter. It might be the only thing at all that mattered.

“Because I love you and I hate being separated from you.” She sat up, leaning forward to place a lingering kiss against his lips.

“But also, because I don’t want to see war do any more damage to the galaxy than it already has or watch any of my friends die. There are things that the First Order did under Snoke’s leadership that were truly horrible, Ben, and I understand why the Resistance would want to fight that.  _ But _ ,” and she spoke more firmly now, as though she had recently figured this out and needed him to see how right she was, “like you said, there was also pain in the galaxy under the Republic. I still lived as a starving child scavenger after my parents  _ sold _ me. That was under the rule of the Republic.”

She paused and he could see that she was thinking about what she wanted to say, so he gave her a moment to choose her words without interruption.

“The First Order is already in control of most of the galaxy and the Resistance doesn’t have the strength to stop it from spreading. You said yourself if you left that someone like Hux would just take over.”

She placed a hand on his cheek, looking into his eyes with love and something more. It was faith. She believed in him.

It made him incredibly proud but also incredibly nervous. He still had so much darkness inside him, so much guilt, and he was afraid of failing her or not living up to her expectations.

“You have so much power now, and the ability to change things for all of us. To make something new for the galaxy. I’ve been thinking, meditating really, about all that’s happened and why the Force is connecting us, why we heard that voice speaking to us, and I think this is the reason. You were right, Ben, we need to let the past die. The Jedi and the Sith, the Empire and the Republic. You can change the fate of the galaxy and bring an end to all of this suffering.”

She leaned in close to him and echoed the words she had spoken to him once before, “I’ll help you.”

He thought of that day in the elevator. She had believed in him then, too, when her life was hanging in the balance. The only thing that had stood between her and her death at Snoke’s command was faith in a man that was lost in darkness.

He had been terrified then, too, of failing her.

Her faith in him had made all the difference in dealing with Snoke, and since that moment their love had helped them to bridge the remaining divide between them.

Maybe faith and love would be enough, if they held onto each other.

“I’m not sure how much of what you want I can give you,” he said honestly. “There are things that need to be done to unite the galaxy under one effective government and I don’t know if you will agree with all of it. I’m not prepared to give up power to a blustering Senate, or hand anything over to the Resistance.”

He knew that she might not agree to that, but he had always been honest with her and she deserved to know that he wasn’t going to turn into a Resistance hero or a Jedi if she came to him.

She nodded. “I understand. This requires compromise but I don’t expect you to be anything other than what you are, which is why we need to do it together. You have the ability to be ruthless and I can be the voice that speaks about the issues that the people of the Resistance need you to hear. It will work, Ben.”

He reached for her, pulling her in and tucking her head under his chin. “Alright, I can meet you somewhere, since you  _ really shouldn’t _ come straight to the  _ Finalizer _ now that I actually think about it. Can you get away from the Resistance?”

“I’ve already come up with a plan,” she said, pleasantly surprising him. “I didn’t just decide to do this because you showed up today. I’ve been planning it since you left.” Then she pulled away from him, and he felt the suspicion rolling off her in the Force before he saw it written all over her face.

“Why shouldn’t I come straight to the Finalizer? I came to the  _ Supremacy _ and that was before you were the Supreme Leader…”

He winced and ran hand through his hair. “I may have told the First Order that you killed Snoke and the guards.”

She lifted a brow at him. “And they believed you? They think I killed all of them,  _ and _ defeated you, apparently, because you didn’t stop me?”

He noticed the smile she was trying so hard to hide and the knot of tension in his stomach dissolved. “Well, most of them probably do. Hux doesn’t but Hux hates me anyway. I just need to make sure that your introduction to the First Order is handled well. It is going to be difficult to explain why I am…whatever it is that we’re doing, with the girl who killed Snoke.”

She smiled at him, bright and blinding. “I’m going to be known as the Snoke Killer,” she laughed, and he knew she found the idea absurd.

“He _ is _ dead because of you. I wouldn’t have been able to do any of that without you.” He nuzzled his face into her neck, willing her to understand that he was grateful for her presence and the freedom she had brought with her.

She pressed a soft kiss to his shoulder, and he knew she understood his meaning.

“Now that I know what he did to you, and the pain that it caused your family, I’m even more glad he’s dead. And,” she continued, “that might actually help with the First Order, since I doubt that anyone would be foolish enough to challenge whatever the Jedi Killer and the Snoke Killer have to say about anything.”

He lifted his head and tugged gently on the ends of her hair, thoroughly enjoying seeing her so relaxed and happy. “A perfect pair,” he announced, “since I didn’t kill Luke and you didn’t kill Snoke. But do you know what sounds even better?”

She shook her head, and he smiled, “The Supreme Leader and his…Empress? Leaderess? Lady Supreme Leader?”

She dissolved into a fit of giggles and he sighed deeply. “I may need to change titles to accommodate your new position,” he admitted.

“A new title may be good, to let the First Order Know that you are changing things and won’t be following in Snoke’s footsteps, but I don’t need a position, Ben, just you.”

She was so full of love and it overwhelmed him. He wanted to give her everything.

He cleared his throat, “Yes, well, you get one anyway. That’s how it works when you get married. I mean, if you will? Marry me?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so excited about the unexpected turns that have happened in this story. This is not at all what I set out to write, but it is the story that I really wanted to tell. 
> 
> Let me know what you think, or comment just to say hi! I don't think anyone is actually reading this, but it makes me happy just to tell the story to myself.


	9. Reunited

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Every separation is a form of death, as every reunion is a type of heaven- Tryon Edwards

Rey stepped quietly out of the small room she still occupied on the  _ Falcon.  _ Most of the others had moved on to makeshift barracks in the caverns outside, but she had stayed, wanting to be close to Leia when they arrived.

It had been several days since Ben had left her, since she had confessed a small part of her turmoil to Rose and been forced to confront that there was no room for compromise in the hearts of the Resistance. At least not now, not yet. Not until Ben had stepped up to show that he could lead without weakness or cruelty.

Even Leia, she knew, had chosen looking after the Republic and the Resistance to dealing with the issues in her relationship with her son. Rey had faith that it wasn’t done out of malice or lack of love, but it had been a mistake. Leia’s first concern should have been to protect the ones that loved and depended on her personally, to make them strong in her love, so that together they could have reached out to help others.

This was a mistake that her lessons with Leia over the past several days had taught her was common to the Jedi Order. They placed the universal good above individual love, rejected attachment at an individual level.

How many people, Rey wondered, had been left behind as Ben had been? Even by the Jedi that were so adored by history?

It had been a hard pill for Rey to swallow, acknowledging that even the General had some fault in the tragedy that had befallen Ben.

Ben hadn’t been blameless, but neither had she, or Han, or Luke. Especially Luke. She knew he had never told another soul besides herself about what he had tried to do to Ben, and it hurt her to keep that from Leia, but would Leia even believe her story?

She understood even more why Ben had fled, why he felt that they wouldn’t believe his version of what happened that night. Not against the word of legendary Jedi Luke Skywalker.

Still, she couldn’t leave without a word, sneaking off in the middle of the night without an explanation. She had stared at the message she was leaving behind for several minutes, typing and erasing the words on the data pad over and over again.

In the end she left the only thing she felt was right.

_ Leia, _

_ I’m sorry. I love you all, but there is a better way. _

_ Rey _

She slipped quietly out into the night as the sky was only just beginning to lighten to a dark grey at the horizon. Even the birds were still silent in the trees.

She knew she would miss this place. The people she cared about, the lush green landscape, the steady hum of life in the Force.

Would Ben still want to live on the  _ Finalizer _ ? Or would they have a real home on a planet somewhere?

It didn’t really matter, she decided as she ran quietly through the camp, reaching out with the Force to sense and evade the patrolling guards. All that mattered was that they were together and moving forward toward peace in the galaxy.

She climbed as stealthily as possible into the X-wing that was farthest from camp. Luckily this one already had an astromech droid loaded in flight position. She would need it to calculate the hyperspace jumps between Ajan Kloss and Naboo.

Ben hadn’t asked her what planet she was on, just told her that she could meet him on a planet near where the Finalizer was currently hovering in space. It was quite a distance, more than an X-wing was really intended to handle, which the droid beeped to her insistently as she began preflight checks and input their destination into the navigation computer, but it could be done in a series of shorter hyperspace jumps.

She pulled her flight helmet on as the first of the guards ran into her view, alerted by the noise of the engine, and she could sense their confusion as they watched her take off from the planet’s surface. There was no denying the guilt that she felt, but she knew what she had to do, and she would have to keep her faith that she had the strength to do it.

She turned off her com, because she knew that Leia and the others would be trying to reach her and made her first jump to hyperspace as soon as she had cleared the atmosphere of Ajan Kloss.

***

“General!”

Leia was standing in the main hold of the Falcon, clutching a data pad in her hand, when the guard ran in.

She held up one hand to silence him. She already knew what he was going to say. He nodded hesitantly, then stepped back outside.

He was quickly replaced by even more bodies crowding around her, all with concern on their faces.

Rose was in the front, clutching desperately to Finn’s hand. Poe and Chewie were behind them, with Threepio standing to the side with the other droids. All of the Resistance adored Rey, but these people were the closest that she had found to family here.

“What happened?” Poe barked, losing his composure entirely in the face of what certainly appeared to be a deep betrayal. “Where did she go? Did you send her somewhere without telling us?”

Leia shook her head, her stomach swimming with sickness at her loss and confusion. First Ben, then Han and Luke, and now Rey. She looked helplessly at the faces around her. She loved them all. Was she destined to lose them all, as well?

Was this how Luke had felt, she wondered, when Ben had betrayed him?

No, it couldn’t be. She clutched the data pad to her chest. Rey had not left them out of anger.

“I don’t have the answers,” she admitted. “I wish I did. I don’t know where she went, or why. All she left was a note that said she loved us, but she believed there was a better way.”

Rose frowned. She opened her mouth to speak, but after a hesitant look at Finn, closed it again with a click of her teeth.

“What is it?” Leia asked. Rose was hiding something. Something that might help her understand all this.

“She made me promise not to tell anyone! She said she wouldn’t speak to him anymore!” Rose looked to be on the verge of tears, and kept looking at Finn as though she was afraid he might vanish at any moment.

“Speak to who anymore?” Leia’s voice was sharper than she intended, but already some of the pieces were beginning to fall into place.

“She didn’t say who it was. Just that the Force had been connecting her to someone. I thought it was sweet at first. Romantic, you know? But then she told me that he was part of the First Order and that he wouldn’t leave them to be with us. Not like Finn did.” Finn was frowning at her, clearly upset that she had been keeping secrets from him, but he pulled her in close at her last words and pressed a soft kiss to her forehead.

Forgiveness was easier when love was involved, Leia thought, though very many other things became more complicated.

Leia sat down at the small holochess table where her husband and son had spent many hours together before her life had fallen apart.

“There is only one person in the First Order that the Force could be connecting her to. Only one person that would be powerful enough for that kind of connection.”

Finn was already shaking his head, though it took the others a few more moments to catch up.

“She wouldn’t,” Finn insisted. “She wouldn’t betray us with that…” he glanced at Leia and stumbled over his last word.

She knew what he was going to say, though. That monster. He  _ was _ a monster. He had killed Han, attacked them on Crait, and destroyed all of her hope.

And yet…and yet Luke had told her that no one was ever really gone, and laid Han’s dice in her palm. She had thought he meant Han, but now, looking back on it, they had been discussing Ben.

Why would he have given her Han’s dice, if his words were about Ben? What message was Luke trying to send her?

The dice had been on the Falcon, the last time she had seen them, and Rey had the Falcon. He was telling her that he had been on the Falcon, she realized, and that he had seen Rey.

Rey, who had admitted to seeing Ben and to surviving that encounter on Starkiller Base.

She had asked about him, Leia remembered. About what had happened and why he had turned.

Ben had offered to be her teacher. Even then Leia had thought that was strange.

If the Force was connecting Rey with her son, there must be a reason. Maybe that was what Luke had seen? A connection, the possibility of things being made right?

“We need to leave,” she said, not acknowledging Finn’s denial. “We have a list of backup planets and we need to move on, just in case Rey reveals our location to the First Order.”

“Rey would not have gone to Kylo Ren!” Finn insisted.

Leia wished she could protect him from what she knew he was feeling right now. She had been faced with that horrible sinking realization that denial couldn’t erase herself once.

Rey was his friend and he cared about her. He wanted to trust her, and this was all hitting him hard, that she had kept secrets from all of them.

“She would,” Leia said calmly, “and she has. The Force works in mysterious ways. There is no way to know if she has fallen to the dark side, or simply following the call of a destiny whose path does not align with our own. We have to go. Rey may betray us. I’ve been betrayed before by people I loved,” she reminded them pointedly.

She had lives that depended on her, and she would take that responsibility seriously, but somehow Leia didn’t believe that Rey would do that.

The girl obviously believed in her connection with Ben. Leia wanted to believe in Rey and to regain her own faith in Ben, as well. For the first time in too many years, she felt real hope for her son.

***

Hyperspace travel was boring. Everything was quiet and there was nothing to see out the viewport but the same blurred lines of light.

Rey had spent some time talking to her new droid, since it was now properly stolen from the Resistance. It was similar to Artoo, but in white and red, rather than blue. It introduced itself as RT-K20 and explained that it had simply been brought to Ajan Kloss with the X-wing. It was fine to be going along with her instead of staying behind.

She was glad. If she had stolen a droid with personal connections, like BB-8 and Poe, she would have felt guilty.

The droid didn’t have much to say, though, and it was a long trip. There were several parsecs between jumps and nothing to do but think. She tried to keep her mind from wandering, from focusing on the fear that when she got there it would be like the last time she has crossed the galaxy to find him.

He had met her with a stony face and stormtroopers with binders. They had come so far to get to this point, she reminded herself, pushing the memory away. She had felt his love for her pour out from the bond until it was so powerful that she feared it might consume her. She would trust in that and in him.

After beginning her last jump, Rey was having a hard time keeping her eyes open and had clearly fallen into a light sleep because the sudden bleep that alerted her that she was nearing her destination jerked her awake.

Her heart was pounding and her hands shaking with nerves when her small ship emerged from hyperspace over another lush green planet. Naboo was vibrantly green, but also had large splotches of blue. Water, she realized with a smile. She was always happy to see plants and water, and after a rough childhood in the desert, she knew she always would be.

She gave a quick look around, but she didn’t see any hovering star destroyers anywhere near the planet. Ben had said there wouldn’t be, that the  _ Finalizer _ was orbiting a planet nearby, but he would be bringing only his personal shuttle, at least at first.

She followed his instructions and landed the X-wing at a spaceport in the capital city of Theed. It was attached to a large, very impressive looking building with round towers, the hangar itself housed in a large cavern.

He had told her that they would be expecting her, and it looked as though they did.

Several workers ran out as she landed, all smiles and warm welcomes despite her obvious affiliation with an illegal Resistance. She hoped they didn’t think she was here to save them, since she knew this system was in an area that had a heavier First Order presence.

“We’ll be happy to help gather your things,” one told her, and they were soon all grabbing what little she had of her personal possessions. A bag with her little available clothing, another with the Jedi texts and Luke’s shattered saber, and her staff. That was all she had brought with her, which was sad, but still more than she’d had when she left Jakku.

“He’s waiting for you inside, ma’am,” one of the workers, a young girl nearly her own age, explained as they started walking across the aircraft hangar toward the interior of a building.

She passed rows of identical silver and yellow starfighters. That was strange. She expected a spaceport to have a variety of aircraft in many different sizes and shapes.

She looked again at the people walking next to her, a little more closely this time. Their uniforms were immaculate, identical, and obviously well cared for.

“Where are we exactly?” she asked.

The girl looked at her in confusion. “Naboo? Theed, I guess. It’s the capital city.”

Rey nodded, “Yes, but this place specifically? This building?”

“This is the palace, ma’am. Home of the Queen of Naboo.”

Of course, it was, she thought. For a nobody from nowhere she was spending a lot of time with royalty, generals, Jedi, and Supreme Leaders. Her life had changed beyond recognition in the past few months.

She paused as they left the hangar. A cold feeling washed over her, an echo of evil and the pain of loss. It passed like a fleeting shadow, but it left behind the feeling that the Force was strongly at work in her presence here. It was no accident that this place was the place that she would come face to face with Ben again.

This planet had secrets that the Force wanted to reveal to both of them.

They entered a long, airy hallway and were met by a young woman in long crimson robes. She had blonde hair and a bright smile. She led the way as Rey and the others, still carrying her meager belongings, fell into step next to her.

“The Supreme Leader has already met with Queen Da’amila and explained that you are here to help facilitate peace between the First Order and the Resistance,” the young woman, who had introduced herself as Arma, informed her. “The Queen is eager to avoid any further conflict and is pleased to offer a neutral meeting place for both parties to discuss the issues.”

It sounded to Rey like a very diplomatic response to Ben’s lie about their reasons for coming here, but it was prudent of the Queen not to deny his demand that they accommodate him when he wanted to use their planet for his personal business. Even if she was less than enthusiastic about it, which Rey strongly suspected she was.

The Finalizer may not have been hovering above their planet, but any objection or perceived threat to the Supreme Leader had implied consequences.

She had assumed that he would just show up to their meeting at some backwater hideaway spot, but that wasn’t really possible she realized. He was the Supreme Leader of the First Order and to go anywhere was probably a major undertaking and a risk to his safety.

She knew from trying to move about the galaxy with Leia that he would draw attention everywhere by virtue of what he was. Even if people didn’t necessarily know that he was the Supreme Leader they would recognize the aura of command and the regal bearing.

If she was going to join him in this world, she had a lot to learn.

“We are grateful to your queen,” Rey muttered, trying to emulate the formal tone and create a response that was appropriate, “The First Order has done much harm under the command of Supreme Leader Snoke, but my hope is that the new Supreme Leader may prove more reasonable.”

The workers clearly didn’t share that hope, and Rey didn’t blame them since their system was a recent First Order acquisition that had been taken over after Ben ascended to the role of command, but they said nothing.

“Supreme Leader Ren has asked that you be brought to him in a private meeting chamber, but the Queen would also like to meet with you at a time of your convenience. She asks only for a short audience if you have time during your visit, and if you are willing you have only to let any attendant know and you will be brought to her immediately.”

Rey nodded, but made no comment. She would have to discuss with Ben whether she should do this or not. The Naboo queen thought she was part of the Resistance and the Queen might be trying to pass messages to Leia and the others that she could not take to them.

They all stopped outside a large set of closed double doors. They were obviously heavy and intricately carved with a pattern of leaves and flowers.

“He is waiting for you in here, my lady. Your things will be taken to your room.” Rey frowned at the formal form of address as the others continued past them, presumably headed to a bedchamber they had prepared for her, but didn’t know how to correct the misunderstanding.

She was no one important. At least, not yet.

She would be, though, she remembered. If Ben had been serious about marrying her. That would change even more about her life.

She took a deep, steadying breath before she pushed the door open. She would soon find out exactly how he would repay the trust she had put in him.

The room was smaller than she expected. More of a small antechamber than a large formal meeting space. It was flooded with late afternoon sunshine and the smell of flowers.

And he was there. Looking out the open window with his cloak rippling as the light breeze tugged on the fabric and teased the ends of his hair.

She could feel him surrounding her, now that she was paying attention, and she realized that since she had emerged from hyperspace his presence in the Force had been growing stronger. She just hadn’t noticed; in the way one didn’t notice a gradual change in temperature.

But he wasn’t alone. There were six other men in the room with him. She recognized them now. These were the Knights of Ren, arranged around the room like bodyguards, which she supposed they were. They reminded her of Snoke’s praetorian guard, nameless and faceless behind black masks instead of red.

Their presence, too, echoed with cold, though nothing as extreme as the feeling she had gotten in the hangar.

He turned as she entered, and her heart faltered when he didn’t smile, only stood and stared at her as endless seconds ticked by. He looked tense and there were dark circles under his eyes, brought to prominent attention by the unusual paleness of his face.

“You came,” he said finally, and she realized that he doubted that she would. He knew she loved him, but he still didn’t have faith that she would choose him over the Resistance or the Jedi. The scars of Snoke’s meddling and his strained relationship with his mother would not be so easily overcome.

She smiled at him, taking a hesitant step forward. Would he hold her in front of the Knights of Ren? Or was she still a secret until he figured out how to handle the reaction of the First Order?

That small step was all he needed to see. It was as though whatever forces of doubt and fear that had been holding him back had been vanquished, and he crossed the room in rushed, powerful strides until he was close enough to sweep her into his arms.

He wrapped his arms around her and lifted her off the ground to spin her in an ecstatic circle.

She laughed, delighted at the pure Force of the love and relief radiating from him. Even being together through their Force connection was nothing compared to actually holding him in the flesh.

When he finally stopped spinning, she cupped his face in her hands, running her thumb over the scar she had given him, and pressed her lips to his. She gave him all of her love, her tenderness, her desperate desire for togetherness.

She needed him to know that it was in him that she had found her home, her family. Nothing else in the galaxy mattered to her as much as he did. Not the Jedi, not even the Resistance, though she loved them all.

He set her on her feet, leaving his forehead pressed to hers as they stood for several moments in the Naboo sunshine, letting the joy of their fully realized connection hum in the bond between them.

It was a subtle shift in the energy of the Force that brought her attention back to the world beyond him. A ripple of unease, an undercurrent of resentment and aggression.

The Knights of Ren were stirring restlessly.

He had never told her exactly what his relationship was with these men, but they were clearly not pleased by what they were witnessing.

“That girl looks like a Jedi,” one of them muttered.

“The master of the Knights of Ren,” responded another, “should only want one thing from a Jedi and that’s death.”

“Has he lost his connection to the shadow? He won’t wear his mask and now  _ this _ ? It’s weakness! He’s breaking the code!”

She had only moments to understand what was happening and figure out the implications. They were turning on him, she realized, because of her. She couldn’t allow that to happen. If their plan was going to work, he needed people to follow his leadership.

He reached out with one arm to shove her behind him, reaching for the saber on his hip with the other, but she had beaten him to it.

The blade hissed and sizzled as it flared to life in her hands, casting a red glow in the walls as the advancing Knights stopped in their tracks.

“I am no Jedi,” she snarled, reaching out with the Force to drag the nearest Knight of Ren to his knees before her.

“She is a Knight of Ren,” Ben announced from beside her, “as much as any of us. She already has her good death, or have you forgotten Snoke and the guards?”

“You question his decision to lead without a helmet? He is the master of the Knights, the Supreme Leader of the galaxy, he has the right to change the code. You will accept it, or you will die.”

There was a long, tense moment as the Knights considered the small woman standing before them with rage in her eyes.

“You have the shadow,” the one his knees said finally. “You would not hesitate to kill me, or any of us. And you have a good death. That is enough.”

The others nodded silently, and Rey turned off Ben’s saber and stepped back.

“You’ll need to take a name,” Ben announced. “One worthy of the first Mistress of the Knights of Ren.”

“I don’t know,” Rey confessed. She hadn’t expected this to go this way. She was trying to find a way for them to meet in the middle, to find balance, not join a dark side cult.

Her distress must have been palpable, because she heard him for the first time inside her mind. His words were as clear as though he had spoken them aloud. The bond between them was getting stronger and being physically together again must have increased its power.

_ This wasn’t part of the plan, but it may be useful in getting you into the First Order without complications. _

She knew she would be asking him to make many changes, so it was only fair for her to bend on this.

“You chose,” she said, reaching for his hand.

He frowned, thinking it over. “Kyra,” he said finally. “You’re Kyra Ren.”


	10. Sins of the Past- Part One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You’re born into this life paying for the sins of someone else’s past. -Bruce Springstein

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter and the next are emotionally heavy for me. I want everyone to know that I tried so hard to give this concept and the characters the respect they deserve!

Half a standard hour later and Kylo still couldn’t believe how quickly she had taken control of the situation.

He should have realized that seeing him with a girl dressed in what basically amounted to Jedi robes would have been enough to tip the Knights over the edge. They had been restless and frustrated ever since he had become Supreme Leader, since he had smashed his helmet and refused to make another one.

He wasn’t playing by the old rules, but he wasn’t making the changes they expected, either. Snoke had made sure they were kept on a tight leash and they had been angry ever since they realized Kylo didn’t intend to turn them loose on the galaxy now that Snoke was dead.

Rey’s demonstration of protective rage and Force ability far superior to their own had been enough to quell any rebelliousness, at least for now. They respected the dark side, the shadow as they called it, and Rey had a strong streak of it despite her determination to cling to the light.

They operated under their own code, one she had used expertly to handle them and give him an opening to gain their loyalty back. He was grateful, because they were both going to be exceptionally vulnerable during her transition.

She was officially a traitor to the cause of the Resistance now, but she was not yet an accepted member of the First Order. A problem only exacerbated by the fact that his hold on his position was still tenuous enough that it might present someone like Hux with the reason and opportunity to attempt to overthrow him.

They needed loyalty more than ever now. And protection.

Rey’s new status would give them both of those things. Not just an inducted member of the Knights of Ren, a _ leader _ of the Knights of Ren. She had taken it, in a move they respected. Obey Kylo or die. If Kylo said she was to be treated as his equal, then they would do so, because they believed her when she said she would kill them otherwise.

Still, it wasn't without cost. He could feel her beginning to come unwound after the conflict had passed. She felt ill and shaky, though she showed none of it on her face and her hands were steady as she handed him back his saber.

He knew that she had thought she was prepared to do anything in order to be with him, but she had not been expecting this.

Her doubts were raging through her mind, but he let her have her thoughts without interruption. There would be time to discuss it once she had been given space to think it through.

He had asked the queen to prepare a place for the emissary of the Resistance to stay during her visit, and after a brief moment of consideration he had opened the door, startling the attendant that waited in the hallway, and requested that Rey be taken to her rooms.

Rey had smiled at him appreciatively, giving his hand a quick, discrete squeeze before she walked away.

He had not been expecting three of the Knights to turn and follow her from the antechamber as she left. Neither of them had given an order, but it seemed to have been decided somehow among the Knights that she was as deserving of protection and loyalty as Kylo himself.

Kyra had made quite the impression.

That would be another adjustment she would have to make. Another change he was asking of her, of them both, already.

It had taken him a long time to get used to everyone calling him Kylo, even though there had been no slips since everyone in the First Order had been forbidden to call him Ben, and he wondered how they would both adjust to the change.

She was going to have to remember to call him Kylo Ren, again he realized. At least in front of other people. No one else knew him as Ben Solo. That was Han and Leia’s son, not the Supreme Leader.

Just as Rey of Jakku was the orphan daughter of the desert. What would Kyra Ren be? Ben hoped she would be kind and just, but firm enough to stand and rage when necessary. Not as detached as the Jedi, not as selfish as the Sith.

It was a path that he had begun to think might actually be possible. Not to be torn between the two but embracing both as necessary.

He watched them go until she was out of sight, then settled down to deal with the data pad that had been relaying instant messages to him since he got here. Hux was demanding his attention, an explanation for why the Supreme Leader had once again left with very little notice, and instructions for what he wanted done in his absence.

Maybe he should let the Knights kill Hux after all, he thought, as the man sprang to life from the holopad in his hand.

It was difficult to concentrate with Rey still so close. Wherever her rooms were, they were nowhere near far enough away for him to separate himself from her emotions, which were growing more intense the longer she was away.

She had been gone more than an hour when he couldn’t stand it anymore. He excused himself abruptly from his meeting with Hux, shutting off the hologram after giving a few curt final instructions, and headed down the long hallway to find her.

He didn’t have to ask which room they had put her in, three motionless sentries in black gave her presence away to anyone who cared to look for her.

They made no move to block him from entering, though he could feel their conflict. She must have asked not to be disturbed. He said nothing, they would work out for themselves whose orders to obey when their mistress’ requests conflicted with his own. He would not be surprised if some of them eventually aligned themselves more firmly with Rey. She certainly had a way with them.

He could feel her rolling emotions from the opposite side of the door and he knew she needed a distraction. He had the perfect idea for that, something he had already hoped to convince her to do with him while they were here.

He lifted his hand and knocked loudly.

She opened the door, and at the sight of him relief washed over her features.

“I can sense how upset you are all the way in the other room,” he explained.

“I’m fine,” she said, “Mostly anyway. Just trying to process all this and what it means.”

He understood some of what she was going through. He had undergone his own flight into the arms of the First Order, though for vastly different reasons.

He considered asking to come in, he had several intimate ideas that would help take her mind off her emotions, but the queen likely had eyes everywhere and it was too soon to reveal the more personal nature of their relationship.

“Walk with me?” he asked, simply.

She didn’t hesitate and stepped into the hallway. He appreciated that she didn’t reach for his hand, though he desperately wished that they could be open about their affection.

She seemed to have a natural grasp of how to handle the fine points of the situations she had been thrust into and he was certain that she was going to make a formidable empress.

Her Knights and Ben’s fell into step behind them as they walked down the hallway toward the busier parts of the castle. Heads turned as they passed, but everyone in the palace knew that they had a special guest. One who wasn’t to be bothered. The palace guards nodded as they walked by but said nothing.

Rey seemed content to simply walk beside him and examine the opulent beauty of the palace until he walked her straight out the door and out into the evening light.

“Where are we going?” she asked, a confused look on her face. She probably expected him to seem less like a man on a particular mission, and more like a lover going for a romantic stroll.

“There is a place I need to see, and I don’t want to go alone,” he answered. “Something Leia told me about years ago.” His mother’s name didn’t taste quite as vile in his mouth these days, he realized.

“Does this planet mean something to you? To your family?”

“In a way, from a long time ago,” he replied.

She wasn’t looking at him. Her eyes were scanning the lush green and beautiful architecture of their surroundings.

“Something happened here, and the Force wants us to know that,” she said with certainty. “I felt it when I arrived. A coldness, a memory in the Force. It reminded me of the cave I told you about, with the mirror.”

“I felt it, too. I’m not sure exactly who it was, or when, but it feels like the long-forgotten presence of the Sith. There are Jedi echoes here, too.”

He stopped walking as she pondered his words. They had reached the place he wanted to see. Above them towered a statue. A beautiful young woman in a grand gown that overlooked a tranquil pool.

The Knights stopped behind them, just out of earshot to guard their privacy.

Rey waited, and he knew she would let him speak when he was ready.

“She was my grandmother,” he explained shortly, waving a hand at the image of a young woman frozen in time. Rey looked back up at the statue. “Her name was Padme. Queen Amidala of Naboo, then later a Senator. This is Leia’s birth mother. And Luke’s. She didn’t get to raise them, though, because of what happened.”

“What  _ did _ happen?” Rey asked.

“My grandfather. I only have pieces of the story because everyone who witnessed it was long dead before I was born, and little of it was passed down to Luke or my mother. What little they did know was kept from me,” he admitted bitterly. “I found out that Darth Vader was Leia’s father the same way everyone else did, a galactic announcement.”

He felt the familiar burn of his rage at that, his hurt. They had kept it from him but held it against him. Every time his temper flared his mother had seen Vader in him, as had Luke, and eventually Snoke.

“They didn’t tell me because they were afraid that I would turn out like him,” he said flatly. “And then that was all Snoke wanted. Another Vader.” He raked a hand through his hair, struggling against the memory of years of frustration.

She just waited quietly, letting him piece it together and offering no judgement or condemnation.

“I was too much Vader for my family and too much Solo for Snoke,” he exclaimed finally. “It was tearing me apart. I couldn’t get rid of the darkness or kill the light, and I tried! I wanted to be enough for someone, anyone, but no one else really saw me.”

He reached for her hand; spies be damned. “Just you.”

She squeezed his hand. The woman whose greatest pain was the lack of family connection offering comfort to the man whose greatest pain was having too much.

“What I know,” he continued, “is that Anakin was a Jedi. He was raised in the temple and trained in their ways. This love, their marriage and their children, were forbidden. For some reason he turned against everyone, even her. Gave up everything, the Jedi, his master, even his wife. He devoted himself to the Empire and he became Darth Vader.”

He let go of her hand, paced a few steps away in agitation.

“I thought it made sense. I’ve been idolizing Vader and his choices because there was a part of my life where the dark and pursuit of power was all that  _ did _ make sense. But when I look at her, now that I have you,” he waved a hand again at the statue,” I can’t understand the choices he made."

“The choice I made,” he realized. “When I wouldn’t go with you on the  _ Supremacy _ , I thought I had such good reasons, but now all I can think about is how close I came to losing you and how much you’ve given up to be here with me. I should have gone with you.”

Rey stepped closer, closing the distance between them and placing her hand on his cheek. “We both made choices. We weren’t ready yet. We needed more time to find the common ground between us. To talk to each other and understand the issues that divided us.”

A flicker of movement caught his eye and he turned to see a swarm of blue butterflies float lazily into the courtyard. Rey, too, turned to watch them as they fluttered around the statue and then enveloped them both in mass of swirling blue wings. One landed on the tip Rey’s nose and she laughed delightedly.

He watched the butterflies, feeling it tickle the edge of some long forgotten memory.

They drifted a few feet away and paused, wings beating in the air but not moving further away. “Do you feel that?” Rey asked.

“They’re waiting for us,” he said. “You were right, there is something here the Force wants us to see.”

He gripped her hand and they started off together in the direction of the waiting butterflies.

They followed them through the winding paths of the palace gardens, Knights of Ren trailing behind them, until they reached a lone building built of gray stone. Brightly colored flowers bloomed around it, spilling over each other in a fragrant garden of color, and green vines climbed the walls.

They both stopped to watch as the butterflies fluttered around it, spreading out to land on the flowers to rest and wait.

“Do you know what this place is?” Rey asked, and he saw her reach uselessly for the empty space at her waist where her saber used to hang. She was unarmed except for her blaster, he realized with a frown.

“No, but I can feel the strong presence of the Sith here,” he answered.

“It feels cold like the hangar, but so much worse. The anger and the loss…” She shook her head, unable to put the feeling into words.

That was understandable, despite the many tragedies she had suffered. He recognized it immediately. Pain, loss, guilt. It was the same sort of silent scream he had felt when he watched his father fall into the depths of Starkiller Base.

He pushed that comparison to her through the bond, because he didn’t have the words to explain it, and she looked at him with tears in her eyes.

“It’s more than that, though. The echoes of the Sith in the palace, that was foreign to me. There’s something about this that’s almost familiar.”

“We need to go inside,” she said gently, and he nodded.

The door creaked when he pushed it open and inside, where he expected to find something dark and grim, he found a small room filled with soft colored light. It was clean and well cared for.

There was a large rectangular structure in the center of the room, surrounded by flowers in large urns. The wall opposite the door was nearly entirely filled by a stained-glass window depicting an image of the same woman from the statue. His grandmother, Padme.

Seeing her in color, he realized how much his mother looked like her, though this woman was softer than Leia, kinder somehow. They shared the same deep brown hair and eyes, the same pert nose and high cheekbones.

He glanced back at the rectangle in the center of the room, it was made from the same gray stone as the building itself but carved in intricate patterns of leaves and flowers.

“It’s her tomb,” Rey said softly, stepping forward to run her fingers over the edge of the sarcophagus. “Why would this place carry the energy of the Sith?”

She turned to look at him, another question on her lips, when the Force rushed in around them, seeming to suck the air out of his lungs.

He reached for Rey, clawing his way to her side as everything dissolved violently before his eyes. She clutched him in fear and he knew that she was as unsettled as he was. The Force had given him unsettling visions, but nothing this abrupt or this violent.

The environment around them shifted and they were suddenly standing in a different room, one filled with sand and junk.

A younger version of Padme stood talking to a blonde boy a few years younger than she was. “Are you an angel?” he asked.

They watched her approach him. She seemed confused by his life. “You’re a slave?”

“My name is Anakin!” the boy replied indignantly.

Rey gasped beside him as the image shifted slightly. The boy clung to a woman while a Jedi watched patiently. “Will I ever see you again?” he asked quietly.

“His mother,” Rey whispered sadly and the scene was ripped away.

Next, they were standing with this same boy. The sand and the junk were gone, replaced by cold glass and spotless carpet. The light side of the Force hummed around them and the child was being judged by a room full of stoic faced adults. He was afraid.

A small green being in Jedi robes approached him, speaking now familiar words, “Fear leads to the anger, anger leads to hate…”

The boy now had a padawan braid and the old Jedi burned on a pyre while the boy watched. Beside him another Jedi mourned.

Time skipped ahead, revealed to them by boy becoming a man. “Be mindful of your thoughts Anakin, they betray you. You have made a commitment to the Jedi order,” his master told him. The same Jedi from the funeral Kylo realized.

Images passed in a blur, of the Jedi and politicians. There was political turmoil, fear, mentions of war and a nameless Sith evil.

And then Rey squeezed his hand and he saw Padme. Gone were her simple clothes from Tatooine. She looked like a senator now in a flowing gown. He felt the rush of Anakin’s desire, his impossible pining. Kylo clutched tightly to Rey’s hand, because Anakin’s feelings so closely mirrored his own.

They stood together, looking over the water. Was this Naboo? He kissed her and she turned her face away, ashamed.

They turned and once again were lost in heat and sand. Anakin held his mother, his grief and rage pouring out of him in a rush of violence and bloodshed. He knelt in the dirt of her grave and made promises he couldn’t keep. Padme was his light; the voice of reason is his pain.

Another ripple and they stood together again, in nearly the same place, but not alone this time. Padme’s gown was made of lace and Anakin now held her hand with robotic fingers. A wedding done in secret. Two very familiar droids were the only witnesses. Rey’s surprise was nearly as strong as his own.

Her face didn’t stay happy for long, a secret embrace and a hidden miracle. “Ani, I’m pregnant.” Where there should have been joy, there was fear.

Her stomach grew with his nightmares. He turned to the Jedi. “Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose,” they told him.

His wife, Kylo thought, his child. Of course, he couldn’t. How could he?

But someone else had offered answers. Someone who had lurked in the background of so many other snippets of their vision. The Sith they had been searching for, waging both sides of a war where he could be the only winner. He had been a shadow in Anakin’s life, as Snoke had been in Ben Solo’s.

They watched in helpless horror as Anakin struggled with his choice, and Rey cried quietly beside him as his grandfather knelt and became Darth Vader in exchange for the lives of his wife and their unborn babe.

She cried loudly when the lightsaber that they had fought over so desperately sliced its way through a roomful of children. He knew she would be reluctant to ever touch it again.

The Force showed them the Jedi, a sea of faces crying out in anguish as the consequences of Anakin’s actions echoed through the galaxy. Kylo hated the Jedi for their flawed philosophy, but it was different to see them like this. Betrayed by those they trusted, as he had once been.

Now Padme came to him again, on a planet made of fire. Mustafar, he knew, for he had been there. To Vader’s castle.

She pleaded, begged him to choose her, to choose their child. He prayed for Anakin to accept her offer, though he knew he wouldn’t.

He shared an uncomfortable glance with Rey, as they both realized how closely this scene resembled their last moments aboard the _ Supremacy _ . She wanted his love, but he was lost in his quest for power.

“Because of Obi-wan?” Anakin asked and Kylo’s heart skipped a beat. He had forgotten. Anakin Skywalker’s master was Obi-Wan Kenobi. The man who had taken the name Ben as he watched over a young Luke.

The man they had seen guide Anakin through his life was Kylo’s own namesake. And when Anakin spotted his master, Kylo knew it was too late.

Padme fell, a sickening sight with her body swollen with child, as Anakin’s fury raged.

When his lightsaber crossed with Obi-wan’s they fought with breathtaking savagery, as only two men who knew the other’s every move could do. The fire raged around them, until they watched in horror as Anakin was cut down and the fire consumed him.

“You were my brother Anakin! I loved you!”

“I hate you!”

The vision suddenly split, allowing them to view two scenes at once. On the left Anakin screamed in agony as his body was forced into unnatural life. On the right, Padme named her children and asked for her husband with her dying breaths.

The voice of Darth Sidious echoed in their minds, “It seems that in your anger, you killed her.”

It wasn't true and the Force wanted them to understand what Anakin had not. Sidious had drained Padme's life force to sustain Anakin as he lay dying. Simultaneously keeping his apprentice alive while removing his last connection to the light and his own humanity. Anakin now had nothing left to lose. 

This was what Snoke had wanted for him, Kylo realized with a sick jolt, when had demanded Han's death.

The depth of Anakin’s rage and despair was too much to be borne, as Kylo's had been.

When the scene disappeared, it seemed only the tomb remained, until they heard the sound of deep mechanical breathing. When they turned, Vader stood beneath the stained-glass window, lost in his regrets.

He faded away, finally leaving Kylo and Rey alone with the horror of his sins and his punishment.

They sank to the floor and he held her as she sobbed into his chest. He didn’t bother to wipe away his own tears, because he knew she wouldn’t judge. They had shared something profound, another layer that bonded them together.

Eventually her tears stopped falling, and he stroked her hair as she held onto him tightly.

The voice that cut through the silence was one that neither of them were prepared to hear, but were now both incredibly familiar with.

“Ben…”


	11. Sins of the Past- Part Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is by avoiding future sins that we retain a remission of the sins of the past- Henry B. Eyring

Rey’s body stiffened at the voice that echoed in the small tomb. She lifted her head from Ben’s chest, turning toward the sound.

Anakin Skywalker stood beneath the stained-glass window, watching them with sad eyes. He appeared still young and was slightly transparent but, most importantly and unlike their visions of him, he was clearly able to see them as they knelt on the floor and held each other in the face of his tragedy.

She scrambled to her feet as Ben did the same beside her.

She was immediately afraid, because the pity and empathy that Ben had felt moments before was suddenly replaced by an overwhelming rage when confronted with the physical manifestation of his grandfather’s spirit.

She could feel the dark side of the Force rip through him, staggering in its power and selfish desire to rip and shred and tear everything around them to ravaged pieces. 

“Ben,” she murmured, placing a hand on his arm. The muscle is rigid beneath her palm and his eyes are locked on Anakin with barely restrained fury.

“Where were you?” he demanded, choking on his own furious sob as it caught in his throat. “Where were you when I needed you? When Luke tried to kill me in my sleep? When I _begged_ you for guidance?” He sneered angrily. “Where are any of you? The galaxy’s precious Jedi?”

She didn’t flinch when he reached for his saber, igniting it with the flick of a finger. There was nothing he could do to a Force ghost, no matter how dearly he might wish he could.

Anakin held his out, palms open in supplication. “Ben, I’m sorry.”

Ben snorted, and for the first time she realized that Anakin’s betrayal had cut Ben as deeply as Luke’s had done, but his sin had been his absence.

“I know the Jedi have their flaws,” Anakin said and he eyed Padme’s sarcophagus with meaning. “But we wanted to help you. We all did, but especially me. I knew what it was like to have everything good inside you twisted and manipulated until it turns to death and destruction.”

Ben’s arm relaxed slightly beneath her palm. He turned off the saber, letting his arm fall to his side in resignation. “Then why didn’t you?” He sounded so hurt, so miserable and Rey ached to hold him, but he had to face this. He deserved answers.

All she could do was be with him and hope he drew strength from her presence. She stepped closer, pushing love and strength to him through the bond. She knew he felt it, and a wave of his gratitude washed over her.

She watched as Anakin shook his head sadly. “We tried, but not even I could get through. Even the dead are subject to the will of the Force.”

His smile was bitter, and Rey wondered how difficult it must have been to know that his grandson was repeating his mistakes and there was nothing he could do to stop it.

“The Force has been at work in your life since before you were born. Luke taught you much about the Living Force, the energy that moves between all living things, but there is more to the Force than that. Much less is known about the Cosmic Force, but it has a will of its own, and you had a destiny. One that we were not allowed to interfere with.”

“My destiny was to live in misery and be manipulated and abused? To kill my own father?”

“Your destiny was to be here,” Anakin explained. “To stand in this place where so much pain began and to understand it. The two of you carry a terrible burden, more even than I can explain, but the first steps of your journey together must be to heal the wounds created by the past.”

“The two of us?” Rey asked. “I’m no one.”

Ben turned toward her, frowning. “Your _parents_ were no one. You weren’t born into some painful legacy of fear or expectation, but you’re _everything_ to me. You come from nothing, but your place has always been beside me. Whatever I have, whatever power or destiny is mine, is also yours. The Force chose you, Rey, because of who you are and so did I.”

Ben reached for her hand, wrapping his much larger one around it and giving a quick squeeze. It was an apology, she knew, for his throne room speech. She had long since puzzled out what he had meant with those words, and that it was his fear that had made his delivery so clumsy, but it was nice to hear it from him directly.

Anakin was nodding at them, watching them carefully. “I think this is why I am finally able to be with you. The two of you are together. You have done what Padme and I did not. You chose each other.”

Rey shook her head, not understanding. “She was your wife.”

“But I did not choose her. Not really. I should have left with her when I married her, but she was devoted to the Senate and I wanted the glory of the Jedi and then to the power of the Sith. It took very little time for you to learn what we could not. In the end you did not choose the dark side or the Jedi, Snoke or the Resistance. You defied everything and everyone to be together. Your strength is in each other. She is your destiny, Ben, the rest is just the path you had to take to find each other.”

Rey looked at him, his tired eyes and the sad twist at the corner of his mouth, and thought about herself as a terrified, abandoned child. The echoes of her desperate screams as her parents left her, all the days she had scratched into the walls of her makeshift desert home, the nights she had fallen asleep with hunger alive like an angry beast in her stomach.

She would have lived it a thousand times to stand here with him now, with his hand on hers and the warmth of his love a constant reassuring hum through the bond. She would never be alone now.

He tipped his head until his forehead rested against her own and she knew he felt the same.

When she turned her head, Anakin smiled at her and she found herself smiling back out of pure instinct. Ben had so much of Han and Leia in him, but just as with Padme, she could see glimpses of him in his grandfather.

“I only have one more question,” Ben asked quietly. “Why me? Why _us_? Why not Luke or Leia? Or no one at all, because these wounds were not ours to heal.”

Anakin shrugged unreassuringly. “I don’t pretend to understand the will of the Force, Ben. But I can tell you this, the dark side and the First Order targeted the children of all the heroes of the Rebellion, including you. You know the First Order rose from the ashes of the Empire and everything they did was planned by Darth Sidious. It was his contingency plan should he ever die and his legacy fall.”

Rey looked at Ben in surprise, but he only nodded. She had very little knowledge about the origins of the First Order, but she would not have suspected that it was all planned before the Empire ever fell.

“It was no coincidence that Snoke was always with you. He was ambitious but loyal to the Empire. When the scattered remains of Sidious’ forces reformed in the Unknown Regions, he rose to power with Sidious’s plan to punish you for what your parents had done with the Rebellion...and for what I had done to the Emperor.”

“He wanted another Vader,” Ben said quietly, “someone to undo your great mistake. A lifetime of service to the dark side, tossed away for a moment of weakness.”

Anakin looked pained, “Like me, you were groomed to be the great weapon of the dark side. You were punished for my mistakes. My real mistakes, hurting the ones I loved.”

“You were never comfortable in the dark side or the light,” Ben said. It wasn’t a question. They all already knew the answer.

Anakin nodded. “I was the Chosen One. Born of no father to fulfill the prophecy of bringing balance to Force.”

Ben and Rey both nodded. They had seen that in the vision.

“But there were other prophecies,” Anakin continued, surprising them both. “The balance of the Force is precarious and easily disrupted. I could bring balance, but maintaining it was beyond my ability.”

“What does that have to do with us?” Ben asked.

“Only the Force knows for sure, but it seems to be connected to Snoke and his plans for you. The dark side was rising, and light to meet it. But not in battle, as Snoke predicted. Something went wrong in the carefully laid plans of both sides and this time they met in love. Perhaps it is the Force seeking lasting balance, or the power to handle whatever dark secrets brought Snoke to power in the Unknown Regions, but it is for the two of you to figure out.”

“We can do what needs to be done, whatever it is.” Rey was confident. She felt invincible when Ben was with her. “Together I don’t think there is anything we can’t do, but we have so much already that needs to be fixed between the First Order and the Resistance.”

Anakin shook his head sadly, “I know. We will give you all the help we can.”

“We? I am still no Jedi,” Ben said defiantly.

“I know, but your heart is not ruled by darkness as it could have been.” And now there was a genuine smile on his face for the first time. “The old ways no longer work, and the Jedi must embrace change. They can no longer fear love.”

He brought his hand up to rest on the corner of the cold gray stone that concealed the body of his wife. “I tried to bring her back,” he said, “until I died myself. Don’t let go of each other, no matter what challenges lie ahead.”

Rey wondered for a moment if he had found peace, found Padme, in the afterlife, before a blue butterfly floated through the door and landed with a flutter of wings on his hand. There was a ripple in the Force, a presence that she had not recognized before, but now recognized immediately.

“She was always with me,” he said softly, “and with you.”

He faded away, and the butterfly with him.

“Thank you,” Ben said aloud to the now empty room, “Grandfather.”

There was a moment of heavy silence as they both stood frozen, letting the weight of all that had happened settle over them.

Ben finally shuddered out a deep breath and looked down to shoot her a quick grin, “Looks like you were the thing that went wrong with Snoke’s plans for me, sweetheart. All those years of work gone to waste.”

She sensed his tension and his need to separate himself from experiencing too many intense emotions in too short of a time. They needed a bit of humor, a moment alone for just the two of them and a bit of reassurance that everything was alright between them.

She couldn’t help the little smirk she gave him in return. “It wasn’t my fault, you kidnapped me, remember?”

“Hmmm, I did. I guess I get the credit, after all.”

“You’ll get credit for something else, too,” she said with mock seriousness. “We do need to kill the past.”

“I think there will be fewer lightsabers involved than I originally intended,” he said with a shake of his head.

Rey’s handed drifted absently to the empty space at her hip. “I’m glad! I have been unarmed since the _Supremacy_.”

“I noticed. I don’t like it. It makes you too vulnerable. We’ll have to fix that as soon as we can.”

She glanced down at his saber. He obviously knew how to fix a broken lightsaber or create a new one. “I guess I need a teacher, then.”

He smiled and leaned in for a quick kiss. “Come on, let’s get back to the palace before it gets late. No need to arouse the queen’s suspicions by wandering around too long.”

They closed the door behind them as they left, and the Knights fell into step behind them as they began the walk back.

While they walked, Rey told him about the queen’s request to meet with her, and her concerns that they were seeking someone to smuggle information to the Resistance.

“I doubt it,” he said calmly. “I am sure they are already in contact with the Resistance. Leia has contacts here who are surely reporting back to her. She probably knew you were here before I did.”

Rey winced. “She thinks I betrayed her. I couldn’t explain…you and all of this.”

“I’m sure she figured it out, or she will soon enough. It’s not going to be a secret that you’re with me. I meant what I said. I want you to be my wife and stand with me.”

Rey nodded, nibbling anxiously on her bottom lip. “But I don’t know when or what’s going to happen next. We had so little time through the bond that we never spoke much of details.”

“I wanted to do it here. Something small and for just us first,” he explained.

“First? How many will there be?”

“Two,” he said. “One here for Ben Solo and Rey of Jakku. I want something that is for us and no one else.”

“And the second?”

“The second will be on Coruscant, when the new Emperor takes a bride in front of the galaxy.”

“Why do we need to do it again? Why not just ascend the throne together?”

“Everyone loves a wedding,” he explained. “Taking a bride from Jakku, that was part of the Resistance, will help provide distraction and avoid bloodshed. That ceremony, and the coronations, will be for the galaxy. Kylo and Kyra Ren will take the thrones as the Emperor and Empress of the New Galactic Order.”

She considered the new name, and the titles he was planning for them. “I don’t know that I can be a good Empress. I have no training in politics or policies. Being a Jedi was frightening enough.”

“You will learn politics and policies. My destiny is yours, remember? And you will still train in the Force. The Jedi temple on Coruscant still stands.”

She pursed her lips in surprise. “I thought I wasn’t going to be a Jedi?”

His hand tightened on hers, a reflexive rejection of the thought. “You won’t be. I want to open the libraries and archives. Let those who want to study the Force come to learn there. They can stay if they wish, but we won’t let children be taken and isolated from their parents. A new order, no Jedi and no Sith.”

She was surprised, but it made sense and was very similar to what Luke has once told her. Just because the Jedi die, doesn’t mean the light dies. Students could learn, but still love and still have lives and families. It was a good system, maybe even a better one if they could make it work.

“And once I am a force using Empress? What then?” she asked. Once she would have feared his plans, but she knew he was trying to take her concerns into consideration.

“Then we begin trying to work out a plan for the government. One that is not weak like the New Republic and can bring lasting peace and real order. No more untamed areas in the outer rim or petty government fighting.”

“No more children harvested for stormtroopers, or planets used to test weaponry,” she said, thinking about Finn and Rose.

He sighed but nodded. “We will have to work through all of it, in a way that does not compromise our control of the galaxy and leave us vulnerable to the Resistance.”

She couldn’t hold back the tears that misted her eyes. She knew they would all hate her, that they didn’t understand what she had done or why. “She’s going to fight us, isn’t she?”

Ben nodded. “Yes. It’s who she is. Until she is satisfied that the galaxy is safe, she will fight us. Maybe even then, because she hates anything that reminds her of the Empire or Vader, and I do both.”

“I’m sorry. She loves you, Ben. I know she does.”

His eyes were still cold, but he didn’t argue, and she decided to let it go while she had made some small progress.

“So, get married twice, become an empress, start a new order of Force users, bring peace to the galaxy and don’t get overthrown by the Resistance and your mom. Seems easy enough. We just can’t forget to schedule in bringing permanent balance to the Force,” she said wearily, nodding to a guard as they passed the doors leading back inside the palace.

“Of course,” he said with a chuckle. “Next week perhaps?”

She laughed, but only for a moment. The weight of responsibility was settling on her and it was overwhelming. “We still have the issue of dealing with Hux and the First Order itself. How will they handle all these changes?”

“We will be able to handle it. He’s coming here, with the _Finalizer_. I trust Naboo to be sensible about our presence, but not for long without more support. We need him, and I told him I was going to bring back something to make the First Order more powerful.”

“Me? He’s going to hate that.”

“He hates me already and the feeling is mutual. I am going to leave you here for a few days, I have arranged for a small treat for you while you wait, and make a few overdue changes that will help keep you safe when you arrive.”

She wanted to ask about the surprise he had planned for her, but they had too many details to work out if this plan was to be successful.

“What sort of changes? Explain it to me?”

He stopped to look at her and she realized they were standing outside the door to her borrowed bedchambers. She glanced quickly down the hallway, but it was empty of everyone but them.

“Would you like to come in?” she asked quietly.

He hesitated, and she understood why. The queen was surely aware of what happened in her own castle, and they had a ruse to maintain at least until Hux arrived with the _Finalizer_.

But she wanted him to be with her tonight. To be so close and still not be able to truly be with him was almost impossibly cruel, especially after everything that had happened in only the few hours since her arrival.

“When will he be here?” she asked, swallowing down the tears that suddenly threatened to fall. Ben was planning to leave her for several days whenever Hux arrived and she wasn’t ready to be separated from him already. Not yet and maybe not ever.

“Tomorrow. Early morning,” he replied, turning the knob and pushing the door open and waiting for her to walk inside. He surprised her by following her in.

He said something to the Knights and closed the door behind him.

“They’ll guard the door in shifts overnight,” he explained. “I’m sure the queen is suspicious already. I wouldn’t have gone strolling in the gardens with most representatives of the Resistance.”

There was probably truth to that, she acknowledged, but she could feel the still raw edges of his emotions through the bond, and his yearning to be near her. He was as reluctant to leave as she was to see him go.

“We can spend tonight deciding what you should say to her when you see the queen,” he said, and she could feel him watching her as she walked to the bed and sat down on the edge. She sank into the softness of the mattress, amazed that anything could be so soft and luxurious.

“And explaining to me your plan for Hux,” she reminded him, but she was only half paying attention as she ran her hands over the blanket.

It was smooth and soft, an unimaginable delight against her skin.

Her attention wandered back to him as pulled his gloves off and tossed them on a nearby table. His cloak landed on the back of a chair. He was messy when he was alone, she realized. The mask of tight control slipping to reveal the man beneath.

The room they had given her was open and spacious. The light pouring in from the sunset outside the windows danced on soft blue fabrics and old, elaborate wooden furniture.

Ben looked out of place here, in a way he hadn’t on a dreadnought or in a hut on Ahch-to, or even a garden full of flowers and butterflies. Like he was restless and too large for the space around him.

He walked the edge of the room, prowling and inspecting the contents and letting his fingers run over the edges of the furniture.

He was nervous. It was amusing and unexpected, but it was true.

She didn’t blame him, in fact her own stomach was suddenly tight and twitchy with nerves and anticipation.

There was no distance between them to cushion their interaction. No bond to close and pull them apart. They were together and this time it would not be an illusion of the Force.

He stopped and stared at the meager belongings that she had brought with her, her bags piled haphazardly on a table and the staff leaning against a nearby wall. The servants had delivered it all here when she first arrived.

“This is all you brought with you?” He sounded angry, though she couldn’t imagine why.

“Yes? It’s all I have and even some of that isn’t really mine. I mean, I stole the Jedi texts from Luke.”

He laughed, shaking his head at her. “Did you really?”

She tipped her chin up in defiance. “Yes, I really did, and I would still like to know what they say, even if I am not going to be a Jedi.”

“I’ll help you,” he said, walking to stand next to her and tuck his finger beneath her chin, “with anything that you want. I’ll read it myself if I can or hire an army of translators if I can’t.”

Rey tensed at the sudden knock on the door. There had been no ripple of threat in the Force, no sound of a scuffle in the hallway, but she was still on edge and worried she might never feel fully relaxed again.

“You get used to it,” Ben murmured, turning to answer the door and leaving Rey sitting on the edge of the bed and staring at him in bemusement. Had he ever felt truly safe? There had always been Snoke, even before Luke tried to murder him in his sleep. She was certain he hadn’t felt safe since becoming the Supreme Leader, not with what he had told her of Hux.

She watched with curiosity as he opened the door, then stepped back to admit a young servant girl carrying a tray. She spoke quickly, but without fear. “Queen Da’amila has asked us to make sure that the Supreme Leader and his guest are served their dinners. I have both of them here for you. Your men will all have food delivered to their sleep quarters as well.”

“Thank you,” Ben said politely, giving Rey a knowing look that both meals had been brought to them on the same tray. They obviously hadn’t bothered to take his food to his own room first.

The girl bowed and left as quickly as she came.

“It might be for the best, we can drop the pretense and she can arrange for someone to marry us before we leave the planet,” he said, sitting at the table and picking up a spoon. He raised a brow at her, waving the spoon to indicate that she should join him.

She sank into the chair opposite him, surprised to find it nearly as comfortable as the bed. “Everything is so soft,” she said, leaning forward to grab her own spoon and sniff delicately at the contents of the bowl in front of her. She was not used to all the different foods she had been introduced to since leaving Jakku.

Portions came in limited flavors.

It had a heavy and decadent scent, and a flavor to match when she dipped the spoon and let the warm liquid run over her tongue.

“It’s good,” she sighed.

“It is,” he said, and he sounded surprised. “The dark side makes it hard to enjoy simple things like food. I have started tasting things again since you came.”

She wasn’t sure what to say to that, it always hurt her so much to realize what Snoke had cost him, so she only smiled at him encouragingly.

Ben watched her as she ate, a small smile lurking at the corner of his mouth. “I am going to love watching you when we get to Coruscant. I have wanted to lay the galaxy at your feet since the first moment I saw you and now I finally get to give you everything.”

“You’re trying to make me spoiled,” she quipped with a smile.

But he didn’t return her humor. “Yes, I am,” he said seriously. “You are so in awe of soft beds and silky fabrics, even a full stomach is a kind of miracle to you. You are never going to go without anything again. I’ll make sure you have anything you want.”

“I just want you,” she said honestly. “Whether that is here, or on Coruscant, or the _Finalizer_ , even on Jakku if you wanted that for some reason.”

“Let’s stick with Coruscant,” he said with a laugh, “and maybe here for the occasional frivolous vacation. And we will stay far away from Jakku, forever if possible.” His eyes grew serious again. “I am going to plant you an ocean of green on Coruscant, Rey, I swear.”


	12. Healing and Handmaidens

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When women work together as a group, it is immensely powerful- Annie Lennox

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the delay on this chapter! I had some life stuff come up and a bit of anxiety that I had to work through so thank you for your patience!

She woke in his arms the following morning, a pleasant hum of excitement running through her at the knowledge that they were taking steps today that would help ensure that she was able to wake in his arms for the rest of her life.

She stared in wonder at the soft boyishness of his face, relaxed and calm in sleep with morning sunlight casting shadows that dappled across his skin.

She pressed a soft kiss to his lips, and he sighed, tightening his arms around her and pulling her into his chest.

She giggled against his mouth. “We don’t have time for this,” she protested. “We have a busy day today, remember?”

He groaned and rolled away from her, tossing his arm over his face.

“The sooner we start, the sooner it will be done,” she reminded him pragmatically.

He nodded, but his face remained set and cold as they dressed. She knew how hard it was for him to leave her after fighting so hard for them to be together, but they had stayed awake far into the night, talking and planning the best course forward in between bouts of passionate love making.

It was the first time they had been able to enjoy each other without fear of the bond closing and tearing them apart. He had been calm and more relaxed than she had ever seen him, lounging against the pillows and regaling her with stories of Hux’s temper and boring First Order meetings.

He listened attentively as she explained her now abandoned Jedi training and the difficulties of life in a Rebel base. She knew they would have fled by now, but she also trusted him not to go looking for them. They would come around, once they realized the good that was being done in the galaxy. There would be no reason to fight, no reason for innocent people to die.

It didn’t take them long to dress and then they hovered awkwardly by the door, her hand in his and their eyes locked on one another.

“I”ll send word to the queen that you are ready to see her as soon as she’s available and leave half of the Knight’s here with you until I return. Once your meeting with her is over, I have made arrangements for something I think you’ll enjoy, and I know you’re going to need.”

She frowned, annoyed that of all the things they had discussed the previous night, he still hadn’t told her what the day’s surprise would be.

“Is it food?” she asked hopefully, and he laughed, shaking his head.

“No, but I’ll have them bring you breakfast before your meeting with the queen,” he promised, pulling her into his arms and kissing her thoroughly. She began to seriously regret urging him to leave the bed so soon, surely their plans could have waited a little while longer.

He pulled away and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “I love you,” he said firmly.

“I love you, too.” She closed her eyes when he let go of her and didn’t open them again until the door closed behind him and his presence faded down the hallway. 

She didn’t have much time to wallow in his absence. A knock on the door brought her breakfast and another young woman in bright crimson robes. She had startlingly red hair and a quick smile.

“I’m supposed to bring you to the queen when you’re done eating,” she said politely. “I can wait outside the door until you’re ready.” Her eyes darted to the door and Rey could feel the waves of apprehension that rolled off her.

“You can wait here,” she said with a gentle smile, “if they bother you.” The Knights were intimidating in their size and their blankness. The gleam of their weapons was threatening enough but masks hid intentions, emotions, and even the object of their gaze-- without the Force to read their emotions, they would be quite frightening.

The girl sighed with relief. “Thank you. I’m trained in self-defense, but those brutes are scary…and ugly.”

Rey laughed as she sat down at the table, eyeing her breakfast of fruit and flaky pastry with unbridled desire. “I’m still not quite used to them myself. Is it normal for the servants here to be trained in self-defense?” She popped a bite of bright orange fruit into her mouth and watched inquisitively as the servant girl shook her head.

“Not all servants. I am a handmaiden to the queen. I serve as her assistant and her loyal protector.” There was a fierce pride in the girl’s eyes that Rey could easily relate to. She was proud of her status and the work that had gotten her there. She would be unshakable in her convictions and deadly in her missions.

“And what is she like?” Rey asked between bites. “The queen?”

“She’s proud,” the girl began carefully, “careful, intelligent.” She shot Rey a speculative look. “She knows you came from the Resistance, but that you came for him.”

Rey nodded without hesitation. She had already decided during her conversations with Ben to be honest with the people of Naboo about her relationship with Ben.

It would make their time here easier, allow for arrangements to be made for their marriage, and hopefully plant the first seeds of question in Leia’s mind when word got back to the Resistance. She would want to know what was happening, and that might draw her to them when the time was right.

“Both of those things are true. The previous Supreme Leader was an evil man, but this one is not. He has been placed in a difficult position since he rose to power, but he seeks peace and prosperity for the galaxy. It is his desire to eliminate the cruelty of the First Order and the corruption of the New Republic.” Now it was Rey’s turn to look at the other woman with speculation. “To do so he will need powerful allies that are devoted to peace and counsel from wise leaders that have knowledge of life under the Senate and First Order crimes that must be addressed.”

The girl frowned and plopped into the chair opposite Rey. She reached for the pastries and took one without asking. “How did you know?” she asked as she bit into her stolen piece of Rey’s breakfast.

“I have spent considerable time with General Organa. I know royalty when I see it,” Rey said with a smile. “Have I answered your questions sufficiently, Highness?”

The queen laughed, relaxed and at ease now that her ruse was up. “I am Queen Da'amila, but my name is Ishta. And you have answered some of them. Why did you choose Naboo for your little rendezvous? The Supreme Leader is a very intimidating man, but he seemed unusually interested in my planet.”

“It’s complicated,” Rey began, licking pastry cream from her finger. “Kylo Ren’s birth name was Ben Solo. He was born to Princess Leia Organa and her husband, Han.”

Ishta’s face registered only mild surprise. “I knew Leia had a son, and it’s interesting that they have ended up on such opposite sides of this conflict, but how does this relate to Naboo?” she asked bluntly.

“As you know, Leia’s biological father was Darth Vader. That information was made known to the galaxy a few years ago. What is less known is that her birth mother was from Naboo. Queen Amidala was Leia’s mother.”

Rey watched the impact of the news settle over Naboo’s current queen. “Queen Amidala had children with Darth Vader?”

“He was not yet Vader, he was a Jedi knight named Anakin Skywalker.”

Ishta nodded, “Yes, I remember now. Leia’s brother is Luke Skywalker.” She pressed her face into her hands. “First, we produce Emperor Palpatine, and now Supreme Leader Kylo Ren. Naboo does not have a legacy of war, yet this is how the galaxy is going to remember us.”

Rey hesitated, then placed a comforting hand on the young queen’s shoulder. “Disgracing Naboo is not his intention. He doesn’t plan to make his birth name or his connection to your home public knowledge. But he would like your help.” Rey looked at her beseechingly. “I would like your help.”

Ishta looked at her skeptically, measuring the sincerity of her words. “How can you help us?” she challenged. “Naboo and the galaxy? We are tired of being torn apart by war, tired of suffering under cruelty or corruption.”

“I was born a nobody,” Rey told her earnestly. “But I have studied the ways of the Force, learned at the side of Jedi, generals, and royalty. I am Rey of Jakku, but I am also Kyra Ren, leader of the Knights of Ren and the intended bride of Supreme Leader Kylo Ren himself. I will pull together the light and dark sides of the Force and guide the galaxy toward leadership that is firm but kind. I was born for this,” Rey said, realizing it herself for the first time.

The queen searched her face for a moment before nodding briskly. “Intended bride? That would explain the wardrobe then. That will be our first gift to you and the first bit of help that I can offer you.”

“Wardrobe?” Rey repeated blankly.

“The Supreme Leader requested that we provide you with clothing fit for a queen. Insisted that we spare no expense, in fact, and that we begin today. Our seamstresses are legendary, and the whole thing will be done in days. If you are going to rule, then you must look the part.”

She stood abruptly and walked to the door. She opened it and peeked into the hallway, speaking quickly to someone that Rey couldn’t see.

“Let’s get started,” she said when she turned back to face Rey. “I’ve sent for the seamstresses and we can begin taking measurements as soon as they arrive. While they work, we can begin to discuss the other help that you have come to me for.”

Three hours later, Rey was exhausted. The queen was an unlimited fountain of information about politics, politicians, and political intrigue. Rey now had detailed lists of names, planets, and organizations piled high on tables next to bolts of fabric in every conceivable color and style. Her head was swimming with knowledge about the flaws of the New Republic and the First Order.

“The galaxy is large,” Ishta emphasized as she held a shimmering back fabric up to the light, “maybe too large. There is much to consider and many voices to be heard for every decision and that slows down the process of decision making in a democracy. It also makes it nearly impossible for one man, even an emperor, to accurately make decisions for every planet.”

“It needs to be made smaller,” Rey surmised. “Broken down into sections that are more manageable and with a central government or authority that has the power to enforce deadlines on certain decisions.”

Rey was standing on a pedestal, arms straight out at her sides as a deep blue silk was pinned to her slender frame. She knew nothing about clothing, but she was impressed that they had asked so many questions about her needs and preferences before they had set to work on designs.

Ishta nodded, tipping her head to observe as Rey’s blue fabric was replaced with a light and airy white. “That would be wonderful for a wedding gown,” she declared. “It suits your usual simple style and is just the thing for the more personal ceremony that you asked for here. A grander gown will be required for the more formal ceremony, and the coronation, but for here this one will do nicely!”

The servants all nodded and set to work on new measurements, making new sketches.

There were more than a dozen women all dressed in light blue and roaming around the room with fabric, scissors, and needles in hand. The royal seamstresses had promised her gowns that would be fine enough for a royal court, but also clothing that she could train and live in for less formal events.

She was glad that Ben had made this a surprise for her. If he had asked her before, she would have denied the need for all of this and been nervous about the process, but now that she was in it, she was enjoying the company and had to admit the clothes were going to be incredible.

She couldn’t wait to see Ben’s face when he came back. Some of her new clothes were getting finishing touches already, and it was all comfortable, functional, and beautiful. She would never have imagined what a Force using empress might look like, but she had every faith that she would look the part when they were done with her.

“Thank you,” she said softly. “For all of this and for your help. The First Order has done little so far for you to place your faith in them, and your help is crucial for us during this transition.”

“I am not putting my faith in the First Order,” Ishta said pragmatically. “I am putting my faith in you and the son of Leia Organa. So much of this pain began here on Naboo, because of one man’s manipulations. Let us begin the healing here as well, with honesty and trust between women.”

She eyed Rey critically as the white fabric was artfully draped and pinned. “The wardrobe will certainly help,” she announced, “but what about the rest of you? Does the First Order have the necessary attendants?”

“The what?” Rey asked, but she didn’t know why she bothered. It didn’t matter what the queen meant because her answer would remain the same. She had no idea what the First Order had or didn’t have.

“Attendants?” the queen repeated. “Someone to help you dress and style your hair? You cannot go around helping to run the galaxy’s government with your hair in those buns like a child.”

Rey frowned and snapped her mouth closed on her protest. She knew she looked like a child, but she had never known any other way to style it.

“If they don’t have one, then you’ll take one of mine,” the queen said firmly.

This time Rey couldn’t bite back her objection. “Oh, no, I couldn’t. Really, I wouldn’t be able to accept having a servant and I couldn’t take one of your ladies away from you or her home.”

“Nonsense, as an empress you are going to have many servants. That's the way it has to be, unless you plan to scrub the Imperial Palace yourself? Prepare meals for thousands? No?” She shook her head at Rey’s stunned expression. “It’s impossible. Treat them with kindness, pay them well, and they will be loyal to you. Servants are not slaves, and you do them no harm to pay them to do their jobs well.”

Rey sighed, deeply and with a great deal of irritation at herself and the situation. Ben would adjust far better to all of this than she would. His life had been full of a great many hardships, but he had dealt with servants and power, expectations and privilege in different forms throughout his life. She had done none of that and at certain moments it made her feel woefully inadequate.

“Edelphi, you have only just begun your training as a seamstress. How do you like it? Would you rather go traipsing across the galaxy chasing adventures with an empress?”

Edelphi, who turned out to be the youngest of the seamstresses, paused in the act of carrying a pile of fabrics to the cutting area and stared at her queen with her mouth slightly parted and eyes wide.

She was a pretty young woman whose straight black hair and dark brown eyes reminded Rey strongly of Rose. A swift wave of sadness washed over her and Rey's heart softened immediately to the idea of allowing her to go, if she wanted to.

“Your Highness? Are you certain?” Her eyes darted from Rey to the queen with wild hope that was barely concealed.

“You’ve always been eager to be off on a grand adventure, now’s your chance. I’m not certain that your sister will thank me when she hears what I have done, but you deserve to have your own destiny.” She flicked a glance to Rey. “Edelphi’s older sister is one of my handmaidens, but unfortunately she was too young at the time of my coronation to be trained herself and has now missed her only opportunity. Perhaps it was fate?”

Rey smiled at the beaming young woman. “I’d be thrilled to have you, if you are willing to come?”

Edelphi spun in a quick circle, fabric clutched her chest with sudden glee. “Yes! Thank you!”

The queen’s laughter echoed around the room and Rey realized she was surprisingly content. There was unity here, and the foundation was being laid in this place that would allow them to build a better future for everyone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter and the next are going to be shorter than the ones I normally post because of the way the story needs to flow in this section. Let me know if you prefer the shorter version over the usual longer ones and I will try to make adjustments.
> 
> I have the rest of the story outlined, and I think we are about a third of the way through the story at this point so thank you so much for reading this far!


	13. Across the Stars

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is not in the stars to hold our destiny, but in ourselves- William Shakespeare

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided not to make this another shorter chapter after all. I moved the chapter break so you got a longer chapter than usual instead!

Kylo watched intently as General Hux and Allegiant General Pryde eyed one another with suspicion across the expanse of a long, well-polished black table.

If Hux had been displeased with the Supreme Leader’s sudden disappearance, which had taken the First Order’s campaign for galactic conquest  _ off schedule _ , he was positively livid now that the Supreme Leader had returned to the ship.

Kylo had not returned with apologies and explanations, which Hux had clearly been expecting if his smug look upon Kylo's return was any indication, but with orders that had drastically changed the entire operating procedure of the First Order itself.

Seated before Kylo, arranged on both sides of the table that had been installed in the throne room during his absence, were ten of the First Order’s highest-ranking officers. Hux, as the highest-ranking officer stationed aboard the Finalizer, was seated nearest to Kylo on the right. Pryde, as the highest-ranking officer of the newly discovered reserve forces, was seated nearest to Kylo on his left.

If the waves of animosity rolling off of both men was an accurate representation of their feelings, they were each busy plotting the other’s hasty demise.

“Supreme Leader Snoke,” Kylo began as everyone turned to look at him expectantly, “had devised a plan for spreading the might of the First Order across the galaxy. Unfortunately, due to…unforeseen circumstances…Supreme Leader Snoke is no longer able to help see those plans through to their conclusion. If we are to be successful, we must be adaptable. As the appointed members of the newly established High Council, you will report to me about the individual areas that you have been assigned to oversee.”

It was risky, to spread power amongst so many, but it had decentralized authority over the First Order’s military and the stormtroopers. Hux viewed his inclusion as a promotion of sorts, but truthfully the creation of the council would mean that any one person’s treason would be able to do less damage.

Kylo had been planning this since he first realized how vulnerable he now was to Hux’s ambition, but if he was to bring Rey aboard safely in the next few days, the change needed to occur now.

He scanned each face, assessed each person at the table to evaluate their emotions. They all remained impassive, even Hux. The shiny new High Council patch on his uniform seemed to have dulled the edge of his hostility, somewhat mollifying his fears of being shut out of leadership after Kylo’s ascension to the throne. Though still bristling with irritation and suspicion, he no longer presented an intense immediate threat.

Given the protection of the Knights and her own skills in the Force, he now felt relatively certain of Rey’s safety.

“Will the Supreme Leader be sharing any information about the item he went to Naboo to recover? I believe that you said it was something that would be a great asset in our conquest? Surely we should include that in our plans?” Hux spoke softly, turning a quizzical eye in his direction.

“It has not yet been properly secured. When it has, it will be on full display for all to see and they will know the power it possesses. Once I have it,” he looked around the room, meeting each pair of eyes in turn, “we will begin our campaign again. I want Coruscant to be secured as soon as possible. The galaxy needs an accessible government and it’s time we give them that.”

Pryde turned to him in surprise. “You will not rule from the  _ Finalizer _ ? I believe Supreme Leader Snoke intended to rule from the _ Supremacy _ indefinitely.”

“This is a much smaller ship, far less capable of being a permanent base of operations. Supreme Leader Snoke looked no farther ahead than the surrender of the galaxy. We will not be at war forever. If peace is to be maintained, more than a military presence will be required. And I,” he concluded, standing to dismiss the meeting, “and not Supreme Leader Snoke.”

He swept from the room, moving swiftly down the halls toward his personal chambers. The entire process with the council had gone much more smoothly than he had anticipated and there was little left to deal with before he returned to the planet’s surface to collect his bride.

The idea that she had agreed to marry him was still something that he struggled to understand. If it hadn’t been for the strength of the bond between them and his ability to feel the depth of her love for him, he wasn’t sure he would truly believe it.

After everything they had been through, she had chosen to be with him.

He was smiling when he walked to his chambers. Soon she would actually be here, as she had been in the vision he had once shown her.

His eyes fell on the large bed, remembering the way her lips had parted in surprise when she had seen his desire for her, the tears that had fallen when she had seen the children he wanted to have with her.

They would soon be beginning the life he had dreamed of, the one that he had once thought would exist only in his fantasies.

Once he finally got her here, she would be safe, loved, and protected.

He glanced around the stark bare surfaces of the chamber. It had never felt like anything more than a place to sleep and for a brief moment he considered having someone begin to make it more suitable to Rey’s tastes, but it would only arouse suspicions and they would be settling in to new chambers on Coruscant soon anyway.

_ Do you think she really loves you? Foolish boy! Even now she speaks with your enemies and they plan to betray you! She will give you and the First Order to the Resistance! _

Kylo shook his head, trying desperately to clear it as the voice invaded his mind again. It never came when he was with Rey, something about their connection seemed to shield him from its intrusion, but it came more and more frequently when he wasn’t with her.

It had become angrier, more desperate, as he fought to ignore it.

_ I created you! I gave you everything! Power! Freedom! You waste my gifts with this treacherous Jedi! _

He narrowed his eyes as something in the voice slipped. For a moment, it didn’t sound like Snoke at all, and cold realization washed over him.

_ Who are you? _ he thought back viciously.  _ You’re not Snoke. He is dead and I am beyond your reach. Snoke gave me nothing but a lifetime of pain. I took my own freedom, my own power. I owe you nothing. _

The voice in his mind screeched in anger, now unrecognizable.  _ You will pay for what you’ve done! You, and her, and all of it. The galaxy will pay for your mistakes! _

It receded, and he was left alone, wondering what the threat might mean and how he could protect himself and everyone else from it.

***

His shuttle touched down in the hangar of the palace again the following morning as dawn lit the sky.

He had spoken to Rey through the bond before either of them had left the comfort of their beds, and she had assured him that everything had gone to plan with the queen and that arrangements for the wedding had been completed.

He hadn’t told her about the incident with the voice. He wanted to save it until after the wedding and not upset her now. She had smiled at him with such enthusiasm as she described her day with the queen and all of the useful information she had learned. He didn’t want to ruin any of this experience for her.

She had also thanked him for the new clothes, and he was eager to see the results of the seamstresses’ efforts. The queens of Naboo were legendary throughout the galaxy for their exquisite fashion and he would have nothing less for his empress.

“Welcome back, your highness. The queen and your bride are waiting for you in the throne room.”

He nodded at the handmaiden who addressed him and fell into step with her and several members of the queen’s guard that came out to meet him. The three Knights that had come with him to the  _ Finalizer _ brought up the rear of the assemblage and servants scrambled out of the way as they swept down the wide hallway.

The doors to the throne room were already open and the sound of women’s laughter echoed down the hall as they approached. He could feel her, so close now, and the comfortable joy she was radiating into the Force warmed his heart.

He wanted her to feel exactly this happy every day of her life, and he was going to rearrange the galaxy to ensure it happened.

The laughter stopped as he stepped into the room and all heads turned to face him.

Queen Da’amila was resplendent on her throne in a blue gown and full traditional face paint. She smiled at him in welcome, but his eyes were already scanning the room for the only person he wanted to see.

She was standing to the right of the queen, chin tipped up in defiance but eyes wide and vulnerable. Her nervousness skittered across the bond, and he knew she was waiting to see his reaction to her appearance.

He stopped mid stride, stunned at the change that occurred in her in such a short time.

She was dressed for travel in loose red silk tunic, cinched in at the waist with a black belt. It reached her knees, but slits at each thigh allowed the material to part so it wouldn’t restrict her range of motion. She wore tight black leather pants beneath it and black boots that hugged her legs tightly to mid-calf. They had designed her new arm wraps, black leather that covered her arms from wrist to elbow, and a silver cuff twisted delicately around her upper left arm.

Her usual buns were gone, replaced by an intricate braided updo that wrapped around a shining headpiece of silver with red gemstones that reminded him of blossoms from the royal garden.

He made a mental note to ask the type and have them planted on Coruscant in her honor.

_ You are the most beautiful thing in this galaxy.  _ He pushed the thought directly into her mind, wrapped in his stunned appreciation, his pride, and his desire.

She exhaled slowly, relaxing as the thought worked its way into her consciousness and she felt the full impact of his emotions.

“Our Supreme Leader is pleased? The full wardrobe has been completed as you requested, and with great emphasis but on Rey’s preferences of course.” The young queen of Naboo looked at him expectantly.

“Yes, she looks stunning. You took care of the other arrangements?” he asked, holding out a hand to Rey and smiling at her as she crossed the room to take it and stand at his side.

“Of course, the wedding is to take place today at sundown in the lake country. A short trip from the city and well worth it for the view. I have made arrangements for the ceremony and witnesses, and all of the necessary belongings have been sent ahead. Lodging has been secured for you and all those who accompany you for the next three days.” She smiled fondly at Rey. “I regret that I cannot attend myself, but these are somewhat difficult times.”

“I apologize for the inconvenience to your people,” he assured her, “and to thank you for your hospitality, I would like to extend the Naboo system the first invitation to send a diplomat to Coruscant once it is under the control of the new government. I would have one representative of each system to represent the local interest as the structure of the new government is decided.”

She nodded graciously. “Once it is safe, we will send a representative as a show of faith in your leadership.”

He bowed, surprising them all, and the queen stood to curtsy. “We will return here for my shuttle before we leave the planet. I look forward to seeing you again, your highness.”

He turned to go, Rey’s hand still in his and a full entourage behind them. An escort of the queen’s guard, six Knights of Ren, one droid (Rey admitted sheepishly to having stolen him from the Resistance) and one small woman in blue dress that he didn’t recognize. He glanced at her curiously.

“Oh, I forgot to mention the queen has allowed me to take one of her ladies with me. That is Edelphi. I need someone to help with the hair and the dresses and such. She’s very kind and willing to teach me all of the things I need to know that I apparently did not learn on Jakku. She did my hair,” Rey pointed to the intricate braiding, “and rubbed me down with all kinds of lotions and potions that she insisted were good for my skin.”

His lips twitched but he managed not to laugh outright. “You smell very nice. You do realize that she is likely a spy, however?” he whispered the last quietly, leaning close so that his lips brushed her ear.

Rey nodded happily. “Of course,” she whispered back, “but what better way to convince your mother that we are doing good things for the galaxy? We are not trying to hide our actions in that regard.”

“Very clever,” he admitted, tucking her hand through his arm, and escorting her down the hall toward their transportation to the lake country.

It was a pleasant trip, though he spent far more of it admiring Rey’s reaction to the lush greenery and expansive waterfalls than he did actually looking at the scenery himself. Her wonder was childlike and enthusiastic, and he was grateful that she had brought some of that into his life. His own life had left little room for those emotions and he was experiencing so many things through her now that he had missed for himself.

They arrived early in the afternoon at a sprawling villa overlooking a large lake. A small crowd of people were gathered on the stairs near the front door. Everyone seemed to have been waiting for their arrival, and several of the children jumped up and down in excitement as the transport came into view.

“What’s all this,” he asked, leaning forward to get a better look. Everyone was smiling and he gave them a small, uncertain wave.

“A small wedding day surprise,” Rey answered with a secretive smile. “The queen and I thought you might like to meet your family.”

“Family?” He frowned, looking at the faces more closely. “I don’t know any of those people.”

“You wouldn’t. This is Padme’s family.” She only smiled at him encouragingly when he whipped his head around to look at her in surprise. “They lost so much when she died. Not just her, but Luke and Leia and you, too.”

“My mother never came here. Or Luke.” He knew why. They had tried to keep it all a secret. Leia’s political career depended on the galaxy remaining ignorant of her true parentage. She had denied them all this connection to family to further own ambition.

A fresh wave of rage and resentment washed over him, followed by a rush of shame. He tried to push it down, to bury it as he had been conditioned to do with his negative emotions. Rey didn’t deserve to have his miserable darkness ruin their wedding day.

Rey’s hand settled over his, and he twined their fingers together. “It’s ok to be angry,” she told him quietly. “So many people made decisions that hurt you. It doesn’t make you a bad person to have feelings about that.”

He sighed deeply, giving her hand a soft squeeze. She knew the worst of him more intimately than anyone else had ever done, and she accepted him unconditionally.

If someone had done that for him years before, taught him that he could be angry and not fear it, perhaps his life would have been different.

“She was so worried about doing the right thing for everyone else, and she overlooked the needs of those who were closest to her,” he spat the words quickly, finally voicing a lifetime of pent up feelings.

He glanced at her face, but there was no judgment there, no fear.

“Yes,” Rey said simply. “She made mistakes. Some of them she learned from and some perhaps not. But she loved you, even if she didn’t always make the right choices. It’s ok to be angry, for as long as you need to be, but it’s also ok to forgive. When you’re ready.”

The transport halted at the bottom of the stairs, but he didn’t take his eyes off hers. He cupped her face in his hands and placed a soft kiss on her lips, lingering for longer than he probably should have before turning away to face the eager eyes of the family he had never known.

“Ready?” she asked, reaching for his hand again and smiling encouragingly.

The moment the door to the transport opened, he was inundated by the babble of many voices and the grasping hands of children who tugged excitedly at his cloak with chubby fingers.

He knew what his grandfather’s choices had done to their family, but they showed no fear of him now.

Many of them looked like Padme, some of them had eyes like his mother, or his uncle’s nose. He was unsure how to react to their welcoming smiles and rapid introductions, but Rey clung tightly to his hand and laughed easily with each new face.

By the time they pressed forward into the house, she had someone’s blonde cherubic toddler clinging tightly to her neck and a dreamy smile on her face.

She wanted this more than she wanted anything else in the galaxy he realized. This connection to family and generations of history. They would have to gain it together, as they had done everything else.

This had been a wedding gift for him, but he was so _ glad  _ that she would be surrounded by something resembling a family when they said their vows.

Some time later, after having listened attentively to several hours of family stories and explanations about how each person present was related to him, she reluctantly handed the now sleeping little girl to her mother and stood up. “It’s getting close to time,” she announced, looking around expectantly. "Did everything arrive safely from the palace?"

Several of the younger women also stood, quickly surrounding her and beginning to lead her from the room, her new handmaiden trailing behind them.

“Yes, we have your gown," they assured her. "We’ll show you to your room. You can bring your lady, of course, but we’d like to help you with your preparations. We’ve gotten to do so little.”

“No, you’ve done so much. I can’t tell you how much it means to us.” Rey’s voice faded as she disappeared down the hallway.

He glanced around and realized that he had been left alone with the children and the eldest woman in the family. Her name was Cordalia and she looked remarkably like his own mother, though the hair that had not yet turned gray looked like it was blonde.

“So, young Benjamin, you have decided to claim both a bride and a galaxy.” He hadn’t objected to them all calling him Ben, the separation between his birth family and his political title was best for everyone involved, but he blinked at her use of his full name. No one had dared to call him Benjamin since he was a very small child.

“It seemed like the best option,” he told her honestly.

She pursed her lips at him. “Padme was my aunt. She loved her young Jedi when she married him here, and she loved him when they brought her home to bury her. We were some of the very few people in the galaxy who knew that Anakin Skywalker was Darth Vader. He came here looking for the child in her womb. Children, as it turned out, but he wasn’t yet aware.”

Kylo nodded cautiously. “He was responsible for many tragedies,” he responded quietly.

“He was indeed.” She looked at him speculatively. “Rumor has it that you’ve been responsible for a few tragedies of your own.”

He tightened the hands on his lap into fists but said nothing. 

“Whatever problems have come to you through the Force or from your Skywalker blood, remember you have her blood, too. She was loving and loyal and she followed her heart. You seem to have done the same. You’ll be a good leader and a good husband.”

“What if I’m not? What if I bring nothing but destruction to the galaxy? To her? What if I lose myself to the darkness forever?” His eyes flicked desperately down the hallway where Rey had disappeared.

“What if I do?” the old woman responded, “Or her? Or any of us? You’re trying, and that gives us all the hope we need.”

“I’ve been afraid all of my life, of what I was capable of. Everyone feared me, they thought I had too much Vader in me,” he confessed. He needed her to know that, this woman who had lost so much at his grandfather’s hands.

“Anakin Skywalker was a good man once, and if rumors are to be believed, he was a good man again at the end. You seem like a good man,” she finished with a nod. “We lost her, and her children. But now maybe we will have gained you and yours.”

He nodded, unable to speak past the lump in his throat.

“Besides, that young lady of yours doesn’t seem like the type to let you stray too far off course. She’ll stand by you and help you lead us all in the right direction.”

The distant sound of footsteps and secretive whispers echoed down the hallway, coming closer before veering away toward the back of the house.

“I think she’s ready. Are you?” There was a teasing glint in her eye that soothed the nerves in his stomach.

“I think I was always ready. I’ve just been waiting for her.” He stood and offered the older woman his arm. “Since my mother isn’t here, would you walk with me to my wedding?”

“I’m honored. The next time you visit, perhaps you could bring your mother along. It would be nice to meet her.”

“I will try,” he told her uncertainly, following her as she led the way to a large set of heavy wooden doors that lead to a wide veranda that overlooked the lake below. “I’m sorry that you won’t get the chance to meet my uncle. He…”

The words died on his lips. How could explain to her that though he hadn’t killed Luke directly, he had tried, and still shouldered most of the responsibility for his death.

She nodded anyway, patting his hand with her much smaller one. Her body was frail, but her tone was brisk, “We heard about Luke. There’s no need to reopen old wounds to apologize to me. I’ve lived many years, and it’s long enough to know that what happens between family is often a surprise to those looking in from the outside.”

He stopped and looked down at her, this small woman who looked so much like his mother. He had already told Rey, and perhaps if he could say it to them, he could someday say it to Leia. “He tried to kill me,” he told her softly, “several years ago. I was at the Jedi temple that he had built and he…he must have thought I was too much like Anakin.” He was grateful that she kept her expression neutral as he spoke. “Luke was a hero to the entire galaxy. If he thought I deserved to die…:

“Then he was wrong,” she laid her hand against his cheek, her thumb coming to rest over the scar on his cheek. “Even heroes make mistakes. Whatever regrets you have, or dark deeds you’ve done, can be overcome with time.”

His body shuddered with the force of the breath he finally released.

She reached up to gently straighten his cloak and push a stray strand of hair back into place. “Now, let’s go get you married.”

They stepped through the doorway and found the entire family waiting for them on the veranda, with the royal guard and the Knights of Ren arrayed loosely around the edges of the gathering, stoically overseeing the proceedings. The assembly was informal, and everyone turned with wide smiles and happy greetings as they approached.

Rey was standing near the railing, smiling and laughing with her new handmaiden and several of the other young women.

She was wearing white again, a long gown of gauzy fabric that floated gently in the breeze. The long sleeves were fitted, as was the bodice until the skirt flared slightly at hips. The only embellishment was a gathering of fabric that edged the wide neckline and added interest when it ended at a small knot over her left shoulder.

Her hair had been braided into a loose crown atop her head and interwoven with narrow white ribbon and small blue blossoms.

The effect was one of elegant simplicity, and it was perfectly suited to Rey.

She looked relaxed and comfortable, with none of the doubts or regrets that he feared he would see on her face.

She turned and met his eyes as he crossed the distance between them, and her face was suddenly suffused with joy and desire. Her eyes shone with a love so intense that it took his breath away, and the bond between them suddenly hummed with the depth of their combined emotion.

She extended a hand when he got closer and wrapped her fingers around his. He bent to press a quick kiss to her cheek. “You look more beautiful than anything I have ever seen,” he murmured softly, a private message that caused a flushed of pride and pleasure to radiate from her.

“And you look every bit like the hero of my dreams. I never imagined I would have a wedding at all when I was growing up on Jakku, but sometimes in my dreams someone would come and carry me away, give me a family.” She looked around, tears gathering in the corners of her eyes. “Look at this, Ben. You’ve already given me so much more than I ever thought possible.”

“I’ve only just begun,” he promised.

He reached into a small, carefully hidden pocket in his tunic and pulled out a small circle of dark metal. “You’ll need this when the ceremony starts,” he explained. “It’s customary to exchange rings and I assumed you didn’t bring one with you from the Resistance base.”

She shook her head. “Things like this were in short supply on Jakku. I’ve never seen a real wedding or even anyone who wore jewelry.” She held it up in the light to examine it, seemingly satisfied with the dull glint of sunlight off its surface. “It suits you,” she declared finally, turning to hand it to her new servant.

“Edelphi and several of your cousins have agreed to stand with me,” she explained, “to be the official witnesses and offer support.”

He glanced at the small group of women hovering nearby. Hearing them referred to so casually as his family was disconcerting, but he didn’t begrudge her the ease with which she had accepted them.

“I’m glad you have someone to stand with you,” he told her, and he meant it, even if there was a small weight in his heart that he had no one. He might have had someone once, a long-ago friend whose death he had tried so hard not to think about since he had become Kylo Ren, but Tai was long gone.

“The Knights will stand with you,” she told him, eyeing them firmly. “They’ve even agreed to remove their helmets for the ceremony.”

A quick scan of their emotions showed them to be undisturbed by her command. Several of them were busy watching the prettiest of the young women with unsurprising interest and they would cause no problems.

“That’s fine then,” he agreed, motioning for them to come closer. They moved to stand behind him, helmets tucked under their arms and eyes calmly scanning their surroundings.

A small and wrinkly old man dressed in formal black robes pushed his way through the crowd, coming to a stop in front of them. “You are the bride and groom, I presume?” he asked in a stiff and haughty voice.

“We are,” Rey replied. Her tone was serious, but he caught the small twitch at the corner of her mouth that confirmed that amusement he could feel her trying to suppress.

“This short notice is highly irregular. I would not be willing to perform this ceremony at all, if it was not for your apparent friends in very high places. Can’t refuse the bidding of the queen after all,” he sniffed indignantly.

“Indeed,” Kylo muttered. “Powerful friends are always beneficial to getting what you want.” He couldn’t quite hide his smile as all six of the Knights of Ren chuckled darkly behind him.

“Well, you will both need to sign the legal forms before we begin,” the cleric said sternly, brandishing a datapad aggressively under their noses.

Rey took it from him before he could accidentally strike someone with his wild gesticulations, quickly tapping in her legal mark and handing it to him. He glanced down, not surprised to discover that Queen Da’amila had arranged for the forms to be signed in his birth name.

The datapad glowed as he tapped Ben Solo in on the signature lines, knowing that there would be time later for the public union of Kylo and Kyra. It had begun to feel less like a name, and more like a title. A mantle of power that protected the family and identity of the man beneath but held no sway over his choices as it once had done.

He handed the datapad back, lifting a brow at the intense way that the cleric inspected the forms. “All seems to be in order,” the small man finally announced begrudgingly. “If everyone is quite ready then we may begin.”

Rey caught his eye with a mischievous grin, and he laughingly bit back a retort about the officiant having been the last one to arrive.

Everyone else gathered around them as the cleric instructed him to join hands with Rey. Her fingers trembled as he held them, but he could feel the excitement and joy that pulsed through the bond.

He listened inattentively to the cleric as he began the ceremony, welcoming the guests and beginning the explanations of what would be expected of the bride and groom as they began their lives together.

Rey shot him an exaggerated grimace when the officiant admonished them to look to the happy couples in their lives for examples on how to love another that almost made him dissolve into an inappropriate fit of laughter. Their absolute lack of good role models was somehow unbelievably funny.

His humor quickly faded as she followed the cleric's prompting and took back the ring he had given her from Edelphi to push it gently onto his hand, raising his finger to her lips for a quick kiss once it was settled in place.

He pulled her ring from his pocket, a dark metal band set with dazzling red and blue stones, and slipped it onto her hand. She flexed her fingers, wiggling them as she adjusted to the weight of it.

He winked at her, holding her hands tighter as they repeated the required vows, their voices mingling in promises of love and eternity.

_ With this ring _

_ I promise you my heart _

_ My love _

_ And my life _

__

_ The Force blessed us the day we met _

_ Your soul whispered to mine _

_ Awakening a fire in me _

_ That has never slept since _

__

_ I will join my life with yours _

_ I will work with you to build our dreams _

_ I will support you in times of trouble _

_ I will rejoice with you in times of happiness _

__

_ Our love will shine across the stars _

_ My heart will be your shelter _

_ My arms will be your home _

_ From this day forward _

_ You are not alone _

He sighed, turning to face her when the cleric pronounced them officially wed, and she reached eagerly for his face, grasping him tightly and pulling him in for an enthusiastic kiss. He wrapped his arms around her waist, holding her tightly as the reality of the moment settled over him.

She was his.


	14. The Rise of Kyra Ren

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even the moon has a dark side- Anonymous

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry for the delay on this chapter. Real life was difficult for a bit but I am working very hard to get all my stories updated and back on a schedule. 
> 
> I think of this chapter as the beginning of the second part of the story. The first part was Rey and Ben coming together, the second part will focus on them working to bring the galaxy together, and the third part...well that's going to be their biggest challenge!

The celebration lasted until well after the sun had sunk below the horizon in a blur of glorious color.

Rey knew that Ben was secretly enjoying it, basking in the attention and affection that had been absent from his life for so long, and she said nothing to complain. Smiling dazzlingly as yet another of his cousins pulled her in for a dance. They had taught her the steps, a smooth glide of one short step and two long ones that turned her in a quick and dizzying circle to the happy notes of a rousing Nabooian folksong.

She tipped back her head and laughed as she twirled. There was family here, and love, in the lush green landscape and she allowed herself to get lost in the moment and let her worries fall away.

Soon enough the weight of the galaxy would settle back on her shoulders, heavy with the burdens of Force and destiny and war. There were an unimaginable number of lives that hung on the choices that would be made in the coming months.

But not now. Not tonight.

“Mind if I step in?”

They skidded to a halt as Ben’s large form suddenly loomed in front of them, and she smiled up at her new husband as the music faded away at the end of the song. The new one the musicians began was soft and slow, a weeping lamentation of love gone wrong.

“He was lucky he was my family,” Ben muttered darkly into her ear as they swayed together in the starlight.

“Hmmm, I don’t think he had eyes for me anyway. His wife was one of the ones that helped me with my gown. They’re expecting a baby soon.” She tipped her head to her previous dance partner, who was handing a drink to a pretty young blond as she sat and watched the dancers with a hand on her well-rounded stomach.

“Ah,” he said, but she didn’t miss the look in his eye, the flash of something that she couldn’t quite identify. He changed the subject before she could ask, and the emotion in the Force was quickly buried by his joy when he looked at her.

“It’s almost time,” he told her huskily. “We can leave whenever you’re ready.”

“I’ve been ready for our wedding night since you asked me to rule the galaxy with you the first time, but where are we going? Aren’t we staying here?”

“No, this was just for the wedding. My great aunt told me that they’ve arranged something more private for the next few days. Sort of a wedding gift. And,” he challenged, “you ran off after the first time I offered you the galaxy.”

“Only because I had to. You were still being kind of a nerf herder, but you know I already wanted you.”

He gave her a cocky grin, one that reminded her strongly of Han though she knew he wasn’t ready to hear it. “I will always be grateful for the day the Force dropped you into my room when I was shirtless.”

She giggled, a blush still rising in her cheeks at the memory. “I was so embarrassed, and I hated you so much I almost couldn’t even enjoy it.”

“Almost,” he teased. “I wanted to kiss you but even if I had known that I could touch you from so far away, I would have been afraid that you’d try to claw my eyes out.”

“You don’t have to worry about it now,” she hinted, looking up at him suggestively.

Ben had never missed an opportunity to kiss her, and when he finally lifted his lips from hers, he led her abruptly away from the crowd.

“We’re ready,” he announced to the leader of the queen’s guard and within minutes she found herself waving goodbye. They had hugged everyone and promised to return before they stepped into a boat that had been docked on the shoreline not far from where they had the ceremony. Ben grasped her hand, settling his other on her waist to steady her when she gasped at the feeling of it rocking gently beneath her feet.

She had seen the boats on Ahch-To but she had never set foot on one before.

As they drifted slowly away from the shore, he whispered to her quietly that it was normal for some people to be sick from the motion, but she found it comforting. It was exactly what she imagined a child would feel being rocked in her mother’s arms.

The boat wasn’t a terribly large one, there was just enough room for the two of them and their entourage of security, and though she might have wished that there was enough privacy for her to do more than hold tightly to his hand as they sailed smoothly across the water, even the lack of privacy couldn’t diminish the joy of watching the moonlight dancing on the water and the cool breeze kissing her skin.

“I have something to give you,” Ben announced suddenly, ignoring all of the people that were discretely pretending not to intrude on their private moment and reaching into his pocket again.

“The ring was quite enough of a gift,” she began as she flexed her fingers to feel the unfamiliar weight of it, but she stumbled to a halt when she saw what rested on the palm of his hand.

Four kyber crystals gleamed dully in the moonlight, each of them pulsing with life.

“I thought these were all destroyed,” she breathed reverently.

“They mostly were,” he said bitterly. “First by the Empire and then the Order. Starkiller Base was carved from a planet that used to be called Ilum, and that was where the Jedi took padawans that were old enough to make their own sabers when it was time to choose their crystals. The Empire had mostly stripped it decades ago to power their Death Star tech, but when the First Order moved in, I saved the ones I could.”

“Why are you giving them to me?” she asked, but she couldn’t resist resting her fingers against them and feeling the power that they held as it beat into the Force like a heartbeat.

“A few reasons. The first of which is that you need a lightsaber and I can’t fix Anakin’s. Even if I could, I didn’t think you would want it anymore anyway?”

She shuddered to the memory of a room full of younglings. “No, I don’t want it.”

“Then I can help you make your own with one of these,” he promised. “You just have to choose one.”

“What will happen to the rest?” she asked, somehow worried that she might hurt the feelings of the ones that she didn’t pick.

“You’ll hold onto them. Give them to your pupils,” he explained.

She blinked up at him in confusion. “I’m not going to be a Jedi.”

“No, you aren’t. I said ‘pupils’ not ‘padawans’. I meant it when I said it was time to let old things die. We’ll teach new Force sensitive beings something else, something beyond the Jedi and the Sith.”

“What is that exactly?”

“I don’t know yet, but we’ll figure it out together.”

She peered down at the crystals in his hand, each a different color and radiating a different energy signature into the Force. She thought back and tried to remember Leia’s lessons on color meanings.

There was blue and green, which didn’t surprise her. Leia had explained that these were the most common colors that had been used by the Jedi. The blue was for those who favored physical combat, and the green those who favored the Force.

Their energy was calm but generic. Surely there would be something more, if she was supposed to bond with her crystal like the legends claimed.

The third was yellow, which was interesting since apparently those had been reserved for sentinels and guardians of the Jedi temple. That couldn’t be the one, since there was no longer a temple left to guard. It pulsated restlessly, the energy skittering across her nerves. Definitely not that one.

The last, she saw with surprise, was purple.

What had Leia told her about purple? She didn’t recall any specific role for this, not sure that Leia had even mentioned that the crystals could be found in this shade.

“The purple was rare even when the crystals were abundant,” Ben told her, sensing her hesitation as her hand hesitated above the stone.

Warmth radiated into her as she wrapped her hand around it, holding it close to her chest.

“I suspected it would be that one,” he said, closing his hand around the others. “I’ll put these back in my pocket until we can store them in your bags.”

She nodded in agreement before turning her head as a small island suddenly appeared ahead of them as though it had been summoned by his last words. They waited the rest of the trip in silence, with Rey clutching the purple crystal in her hand.

As they approached the island, she realized that there was nothing rising above the waves except a few trees and a tiny two-story cottage covered in vines and flowers.There was not going to be much more privacy than the boat but it was a picturesque honeymoon scene, nonetheless.

“They aren’t staying?” she blurts, surprised when Ben helps her step onto the shore and then turns his back as the boat leaves with their guard. She wasn't able to hide the relief in her tone.

“No, the queen’s guard and the Knights will wait for us back in the mainland. They’ll return in time to have us back to the city on schedule. We’re safe here, and no one else knows where we are, so we can be alone. Well, except for this,” he said, indicating the data pad that kept him in contact with the guard and the  _ Finalizer _ above them.

He took her hand and started walking toward the cottage and she followed, reaching out with the Force to avoid tripping over roots and rocks in the darkness.

“I feel like we should cherish that. Being alone, I mean. I’m sure that it won’t happen often once we finally reach the  _ Finalizer _ .”

“It won’t” he acknowledged, looking at her apologetically over his shoulder as he walked. “Leia was just a senator and I still spent the first several years of my life surrounded by servants and droids and guards. It can be lonely, but you’re never alone. I didn’t know what alone was until they sent me to Luke.”

She hummed disapprovingly of their choice to send him away, but she wasn’t truly bothered by the information he was giving her. “I was always alone,” she reminded him. “It took some getting used to when I joined up with the Resistance, close quarters, but I managed. I’ll adjust to this, too.”

He stopped at the cottage door and cupped her cheeks in his hand. “Are you sure you’ll be ok? Things have changed so fast for you.”

“They have,” she said, tipping her head to lean into his palm, “and they will change more soon. It’s worth it, to be with you. Honestly, anything is better than a slow death full of boredom and isolation on Jakku.”

“Even being responsible for the well-being of a whole galaxy full of people that currently hate us and everything they think we are?” His face was serious, but she didn’t miss the teasing glint in his eye.

“Even that,” she assured him, stretching up on her tiptoes to press a kiss to his lips.

A startled laugh escaped her when he bent suddenly and swept her into his arms.

“Old tradition,” he explained, “The groom carries the bride over the doorway for the wedding night.”

She’d never heard of such a thing on Jakku, but any excuse to be held in his arms seemed like a good one so she relaxed, resting her head comfortably against his shoulder as he worked the door open and stepped inside.

Someone had already been inside and left the lights on, as well as a tray of food on a table near the door.

“They really thought of everything,” she mused as Ben set her on her feet again.

“Seems that way,” he said, picking up a piece of fruit and popping it into her mouth.

“Oh, I almost forgot,” she said abruptly. “Did they, um, did they bring our bags from the palace?”

“They’re supposed to be upstairs already,” he said and was looking at her curiously.

She couldn’t hide the blush that was creeping up her cheeks as held her hands up in supplication. “Just let me…I need a minute? I’ll call you up when I’m ready.”

“Is everything ok?”

“Yes, but I have a gift for you too. Just wait here,” she instructed. She watched him closely as she ascended the stairs to make sure he wasn’t trying to follow.

The bags had been laid neatly at the foot of the bed, and she found what she had been looking for buried at the bottom of the largest one. It only took a few deep breaths and fifteen minutes for her to be ready.

“Ok, you can come up now,” she called, ignoring the quaver in her voice and trying to paste a confident smile on her face as she heard the sound of his footsteps on the staircase.

When he entered the bedroom, she noticed that he had already removed his cape and his boots, and that even the tight over layer of his top was gone, leaving just the loose black tunic beneath. For a brief moment he looked happy and even relaxed.

When he spotted her, waiting for him next to the large bed with her fingers twisted together and nerves rippling uneasily through the Force, he froze.

Her gift was one of many that had been made by the seamstresses as part of her new wardrobe, though she had protested the necessity of such things. It was customary, they insisted, for married women to have several such outfits and the older and wiser among them had described the function and use of the pieces.

The one she had chosen for tonight was white, to match her gown from the ceremony, and consisted of nothing more than a few flowing strips of silk accented with lace and dark gray jewels. Her breasts were barely covered, and though the silk flowed freely about the front and sides of her thighs, most of her stomach was also nearly bare.

Now, after seeing the way his eyes darkened with nearly unhinged desire, she had to admit that they had been right. She could see the breath he took, and the way his fists clenched and unclenched compulsively at his sides and it soothed her nerves.

He liked it, and that was what mattered most.

She tipped her head back to look up into his eyes when he crossed the room to stand in front of her. His gaze was intense and he was clearly barely in control of the urges that she knew were simmering just below the surface.

There was no longer anger and misunderstanding between them, but his eyes burned when he looked at her just the same. She hoped he never lost that, the hot possessive reverence that caused her skin to tingle and her heart to beat too fast.

He ran a hand down her side, barely touching the lace and the skin beneath with the tips of his fingers and leaving a trail of warmth that made need pool through her.

“Let’s just leave this on,” he suggested quietly, picking up a fluttering piece of white silk and rubbing it between his fingers. “I want to see it on you when I’m buried so deeply inside you that we can’t remember where one of us ends and the other begins.”

She had thought that she would be beyond blushing after everything that they had shared together, but he consistently found new ways to pull that feeling of slightly embarrassed pleasure from her.

‘You’re beautiful,” he murmured as he pulled her closer and fit her body against him. She felt the evidence of his arousal as it pressed into her stomach and shivered in anticipation.

It had been a long day, emotionally draining for both of them, but they were both shaking with need for each other as he pressed his lips to hers and slid his tongue inside to explore the recesses of her mouth.

She welcomed him in with a small moan, drawing him down to wrap her arms around his neck as she lifted herself onto her toes to press against him even more firmly.

She curved one leg to rub it invitingly against his hip, but he seemed unsatisfied with the gesture, instead lifting her off her feet and settling her down again with one leg dangling over each side of his own thick thigh.

The new position was startling and forced her to spread her legs wide enough that he was suddenly pressed against her core. It was somehow raw and vulnerable in entirely new ways than the ones she had known before.

He held her with one arm wrapped around her waist and the other hand firmly gripping her hip as he encouraged her to move against the hard muscle of his leg. The initial embarrassment faded away as he urged her on with words of arousal and praise.

She was soon unfazed by the wetness that was soaking into the black fabric of his pants as her body suddenly leapt over the precipice into a surprisingly intense and explosive peak.

He kissed her temple as she trembled in his arms and then lifted her just long enough to lay her gently on the bed behind them.

She watched eagerly from beneath her lashes as he reached for the hem of his shirt and drew it over his head. His body was pale in the moonlight that streamed in the window and cast shadows on each line of muscle.

When he pushed his pants down over his hips, she was pleased to see that he was already hard with desire. She still felt empty and the thought of him moving inside her was incredibly tempting, but the edge of her own need had been satiated enough for her to be patient.

She lifted herself up into her knees on the edge of the bed, the height of the bed making her nearly eye level to him when he stood before her. She hooked her arm around his neck and pulled him in, sliding her tongue past his lips as her other hand wrapped firmly around the hard length of him.

Her fingers moved over him lazily, working him slowly into an aching mess of need and arousal beneath her hand. He moaned with each stroke, and the sound of his pleasure steadily built her own need until she was as desperate as he was.

He let her tease him until his heart was racing and his breathing was ragged before his control snapped and he pulled her under him, pressing her into the soft mattress and nudging her legs apart with his knees.

She arched up in welcome when he plunged into her roughly and her fingers dug into his hips urging him on. He supported most of his weight on his forearms, caging her head between them and surrounding her with his body as he claimed her with each demanding thrust.

She wrapped her legs around him, holding tight as he pushed them both over the edge into a frenzied pleasure that left her limp and satisfied beneath him.

“That was an excellent start to my life as a married woman,” she told him after he had rolled off her. She propped her chin in her hand and smiled at him contentedly.

“Hmph,” he grunted. “I think I can do better.”

“Do you? Well, we might have to try.”

“As many times as we can before we have to leave,” he promised huskily as he traced a path up her inner thigh and slipped his fingers inside her.

He was a man of his word. They passed the next two days wrapped in each other, time passing in a hazy bliss of passion and domesticity that she hadn’t expected.

Enveloped in this protective bubble, everything else fell away and Ben became softer and more relaxed than she had ever seen him. He smiled easily and often, and she could sense none of his usual tension and cautious pessimism.

He cooked for her at every meal, taking up all the room in the small kitchen and delighting her with the different flavors and textures that he concocted. She couldn’t decide which she appreciated more, a full stomach or the sight of the muscles in back rippling as he stirred up a marinade or a delicate sauce.

Though she knew it was hard for him not to, he didn’t spend too much time keeping up with the constant barrage of demands and questions that poured in on the datapad, responding only a few times a day to an increasingly frustrated sounding Hux.

“I think we need to make sure we are on the same page about names,” he announced the second morning over breakfast and causing her to pause with a spoon halfway to her mouth. “You’re used to calling me Ben, and I understand why, but it’s not what the First Order knows me by and it reveals too much about my past and my history to those who might be looking to cause problems.”

She didn’t have to ask what prompted this conversation, since she had been screaming his name into her pillow just before they sat down to breakfast. “You think it might put everyone in your family at greater risk?”

“Among other things. It also weakens my authority and credibility. I’m the master of the Knights of Ren and a dark side apprentice, all of which helps keep some of the more ambitious and vocal dissenters under control. That reputation benefits me… and you, remember?”

“Kyra,” she said, letting the word roll around inside her mouth, testing the feel of it.

“Yes, and I think that can work in our favor. We’ll introduce you to the galaxy as Rey of Jakku, and then have you publicly ascend to the role of Kyra Ren at the coronation.”

“So, I have to stop calling you Ben?” She knew her face made her opinion clear since he sighed deeply and reached her hand.

“Just in public. In our own spaces we are Ben and Rey Solo.” He pressed a kiss to her knuckles, and she felt her resolve to never call him Kylo again soften.

“I can agree to that,” she said finally. “Kylo was the name you gave yourself when you embraced the darkness, but I have learned to love that part of you, too. No more forced choices between the perfect light and the consuming darkness. We’ll walk the line between them together.”

“Hux is going to be our biggest challenge in all of this,” he predicted, holding up the datapad as yet another incoming message popped up on the screen. She couldn't think of an argument against that as he walked away, snarling instructions to Hux and leaving Rey sitting at the table with a knot of unease building in her stomach.

She managed to avoid the subject of his angry general for most of the rest of their stay, skirting around it when Ben tries to bring him up again. She knew he hated both of them, blaming her for Snoke’s death and Ben for being in the way of whatever ambitious plans he had devised over the years, but that wasn't what bothered her most.

In her mind, he represented the fury and destructive power of the First Order more than Ben ever had. He had been involved directly in everything from the destruction of the Hosnian system to nearly killing Finn and Rose when they got caught sneaking onto Snoke’s flagship.

Now that it was nearly time to actually confront him, she realized it was going to take all of her resolve.

“You’re going to have to face him,” Ben told her the night before they left, “ if you're ready to take your place in all this.”

“I’m ready,” she said firmly.

***

Ben watched her as the command shuttle rose through Naboo’s atmosphere.

She was wearing a form fitting black dress that was clearly intended to mimic his own usual attire. Cleverly designed with a deep slit up each side and tight pants beneath, the elegance of her appearance did nothing to prevent the gown from doubling as a combat ready uniform. 

Her face was calm, and he couldn't feel any sign of nerves through the bond in the Force. She was determined and emotionally steady, full of confidence that her life was safe with him and the Knights.

He flicked a glance at his men. They, too, were impassive beneath their helmets. They had already been briefed on what to do if there are any problems on arrival, and if anything they were itching to unleash hell in defense of their new mistress.

They had all gone over the plan several times and everyone knew their part- what to do and what to expect.

He was still nervous.

“I wasn’t sure about offering you this,” he said, pulling out a black handled lightsaber from a drawer. “I know you didn’t really want Anakin’s because of what its done, and you might feel the same about this one, but I would feel better if you were armed with more than an old blaster.”

She flipped the switch, igniting the red blade, and staring at it with a look of deep consideration. For one wild moment she looked like a young Sith apprentice with the red glow shining on her face

“I’m not thrilled about it- where did it come from anyway?- but I agree," she said finally. "It’s better to be armed.”

Her tone was pragmatic, but he wished she had her own saber already. Something about seeing her with a red blade in her hand was unsettling.

“We found it in the remnants of the Empire,” he explained. “I searched for Vader’s for a long time, but even though I never found it, I found others. Vader wasn’t Darth Sidious’ only apprentice and there were other dark side Force users besides them. I think this one might have actually belonged to an assassin. Not really a Sith, but Force sensitive and loyal to the Empire anyway.”

She nodded and clipped it to her belt as the shuttle set down in the hangar. “Well, its mine, at least for now,” she said as she pulled up the hood of her gown to hide her face.

He took his place beside her as the door hissed open to reveal rows of stormtroopers and First Order officers ready to welcome the Supreme Leader. If they were surprised to see him return with another intimidating figure in black, they gave no indication.

“A vastly different experience than the last time I arrived aboard a First Order ship,” she muttered to him as they started down the ramp.

“No binders this time,” he agreed quietly, and he heard her giggle softly from beneath her hood.

He looked around but found that the one face he had expected to be waiting was conspicuously absent. Rey drew to a halt beside him when he stopped to greet the officer that waited patiently at the end of the ramp.

“Welcome back, Supreme Leader,” the small man squeaked nervously. Something about him seemed familiar, but a quick glance at the man’s name tag didn’t trigger anything in Ben’s memory.

“Where’s General Hux?” he demanded, forgoing the usual polite greeting in his annoyance.

“On the bridge, Supreme Leader,” the man replied, and it was obvious that he was relieved he had the answer to his superior’s question.

“Thank you, Lieutenant Mitaka.”

The officer put on a brave face, but Ben saw him shiver as Rey and the Knights passed by and chuckled to himself. That one was a bit easily ruffled.

They swept down the corridors, Edelphi’s crimson travel cloak the only spark of color in a sea of black, forcing all of the unfortunate troopers they encountered to stand to the side so as they went by.

Rey looked around curiously from beneath the hood, but she kept it subtle and contained. Nothing to draw suspicion until they confronted Hux and the rest of the council. She had excellent instincts and it caused a swell of pride to rise in his chest.

Every eye turned to face them when they walked onto the bridge.

“Ah, excellent, our fearless leader had returned,” Hux said scornfully. “I trust whatever was so important on Naboo has been retrieved?”

“It has,” Ben said calmly,“ and it will benefit every aspect of the First Order’s plans.”

Rey stepped forward, aligning herself at his side as she swept back her hood to reveal her face. He could feel the Knights tense behind him, ready to spring into action if anyone threatened to harm her, but Hux was too foolish to notice anything beyond his own incredulity.

“Your future Empress," Ben said firmly. "Please inform the troops that her every order is to be obeyed.”

The sneer on Hux’s face was predictable, but Rey’s reaction took him by surprise. She pulled the borrowed red saber from her hip, igniting it with a snarl as she stepped forward.

Hux fell back in surprise as she advanced, and Ben reached out a hand to grab him with the Force, wrapping it around his throat and lifting him into his toes.

“Yes, Supreme Leader,” Hux choked out grimly, “anything for the new empress.”

He straightened his coat indignantly after Ben dropped him back onto the floor, but he didn’t glare at Rey again as she clipped the saber back onto her belt.

As savage as she had been a moment ago, he was impressed to see that she was now calm and collected. She had done this once against his Knights on Naboo and now he wondered if this was also what had happened between her and Luke and Ahch-to?

He had no doubt that she had just pulled from the dark side of the force, but without training or rigid rule systems to instill fear of her natural impulses, she was using it without being devoured by it.

Hux’s eyes shifted almost imperceptibly to the Knights behind them, all of whom had closed around them in a protective semi-circle and were watching him intently from beneath their helmets.

Ben saw it then, the flicker of recognition that finally bloomed in the general’s eyes as he considered his options and realized that he no longer had enough control over the stormtroopers to act against Ben's plans, that the formation of the council had stripped him of enough of his authority that he had no choice but to accept this unexpected turn of events.

Rage seethed below the surface, but his face was impassive as he scanned Rey’s attire and the Knight’s show of loyalty. He frowned when he spotted Edelphi at the back of the group, who had been silent and unobtrusive as she watched the events unfold.

There was a steady determination radiating from her that made Ben glad that this woman was the one chosen to accompany his wife. She would not be easily shaken by the politics and intrigue that he knew was coming.

“This is what you’ve brought to the First Order? A murderous Jedi and a servant from Naboo?” Hux's tone was more respectful, but the challenge to his superior’s decision-making skills was still far too evident.

Rey’s hand flexed on the hilt of her saber again as Ben corrected him haughtily, “I have brought one of the most powerful force users in the galaxy, who has betrayed the Resistance to aid the First Order in bringing peace and prosperity to our new empire.”


	15. The Proclamation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where there is unity, there is always victory- Publilius Syrus

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am going to be honest and admit that there is a very good chance that this is going to end up being more than 30 chapters, I am just not sure exactly how much to increase the chapter count by yet. We still have so much left to cover in the story that I don't think I can get it all done well in the chapters we have left.
> 
> TW/CW-brief implication of sexual assualt and canon child abuse
> 
> There is a brief mention of Hux's mother and it is implied that Hux's conception was under non-consensual circumstances, which results in her refusing to care for him and placing him in the custody of his father. There is also depiction of the canon abuse that Hux suffered at the hands of his father when he was a child.
> 
> To skip this, the vision of the past that Rey sees begins with the line "Now I have to explain..." and ends with the line The vision dropped her...

Hux was tense and silent after Ben’s announcement. Rey could feel the hatred that poured off of him in waves, most of it directed at Ben, some of it directed at her, some of it directed at everyone and everything else.

His desire to see his Supreme Leader dead didn’t seem to be as much of a personal grudge as she had anticipated. This man was a tightly wound ball of anxiety, pain, and anger, held together by ambition and willpower. He was clearly dangerous, and Ben must have been mad to keep him around for so long, no matter what reasons he believed he had to justify his choice.

“Is something wrong, General Hux?”

He paused in his blatantly derisive scan of her body and flicked an impersonal glance at her face. “No, Empress. I was only wondering that you have such a similar uniform to the Supreme Leader’s already, but your blaster is so far outside of regulation. It seems almost the style of a member of the Resistance,” he said, his tone smug and vicious. “We wouldn’t want anyone getting the wrong idea about who’s side you’re on, now would we?”

Ben bristled beside her, but she squeezed his hand, steadying him to let her handle Hux on her own.

She placed a hand on the blaster that she had strapped to her hip, the one she had carried since Han had given it to her on Takodona. She hated to remove it, but Hux had a point. If she was going to step into this role, she needed to look like she belonged entirely with the First Order, at least for now.

“Of course, you’re right General Hux- I do seem to have neglected that particular detail. I’ll be needing a more fitting weapon now that I have joined your prestigious ranks. Thank you for being kind enough to volunteer.” She held out a hand, empty palm waiting in silent demand as Hux looked at her in barely repressed shock and fury. “General?” she prompted quietly.

He unfastened the holster at his waist, slapped his blaster unceremoniously into her outstretched hand, and her world went white.

An older angrier version of Hux now stood in front of her on the bridge of a different ship, the same blaster resting in his own holster, and he was speaking in low furious tones to someone that she couldn’t see.

“Now I have to explain to my wife that I have to raise this little welp I got off some bitch in the kitchens,” he complained. “The mother doesn’t want him and won’t take care of him. Obviously, she’s trying to humiliate me because she was flaunting herself in front of me and then wanted to pretend that she wasn’t interested when the time came to pay up for being a tease.”

He shook his head, and Rey felt her stomach drop at what he must have done to the poor nameless woman that would have caused her to hand off her own infant because she couldn’t bear to look at it.

She turned, startled by the sudden screaming of a child and the sickening sound of blows on flesh, and found herself being pulled forward. The ship faded and the image in front of her changed to resemble the view of hyperspace through a viewport, black with streaks of sparkling white as she passed by it all in a rush.

She jerked to a sudden stop and found herself looking at a young boy with pale skin and red hair. This was a young Hux, wearing a gray uniform and carrying a tray, the contents of which lay broken on the floor at his feet. He looked terrified and couldn’t repress a whimper.

“I’ll clean it,” he stammered. “I’ll wipe it up and…”

Another voice spoke, interrupting the child, and Rey turned to see the same man, a man that she now understood must be Hux’s father, and another officer. Both were wearing the uniform of the old Empire and the same hateful expression.

“Be a shame to waste all of that,” the other officer said with a cruel smirk. “He should lick it up.”

Hux turned, his eyes filled with fear as he pleaded for his father to intervene on his behalf. “Father…”

Rey was sick and furious when the older man said nothing, and Hux dropped to his hands and knees to begin licking spilled water and broken glass from the floor.

“Weak, sniveling…” the other man began but was interrupted as Hux was yanked painfully to his feet by his father’s vice like grip on one arm.

“Get up, Armitage,” his father growled, and the scene faded.

When Rey saw him again, Hux was huddled in the corner of his bedroom. He appeared to be a bit older, all knobby knees and awkward angles as he hugged his arms around himself. He was covered in cuts and bruises, all in varying stages of healing, and had a black eye. His expression was no longer frightened, his gaze was empty of everything except resolve, a determination to survive.

She reached out, knowing that she couldn’t reach him but compelled to try, and he disappeared like a puff of smoke.

The ground rumbled beneath her feet and she was on a small transport, filled with children that all had the same look in their eyes. Hux stood before them, thin and ramrod straight. “The Empire has fallen, but we are going into the Unknown Regions to rebuild our legacy. We all have an important role to play…”

Time jumped forward again and now he was an adult, wearing the uniform of the First Order and whispering to a woman in a shining suit of stormtrooper armor. “Is it done, Phasma?”

“It is,” she responded calmly. “Brendol Hux is dead, and it will never be able to be traced back to you.”

“Good, we have much to do to get our first generation of stormtroopers ready to face the Republic. Their weakness and corruption must not be allowed to continue defiling the galaxy and my father was in our way.”

The vision dropped her back into the present and she opened her eyes with a start to find that only seconds had passed. Hux was still looking at her with rage as she tightened her fingers around the blaster that had once belonged to the father whose murder he had orchestrated.

He still radiated hatred, but she could no longer look at him without seeing a hurt and frightened child that had done what he needed to do in order to survive.

She sighed, unsure of what she was going to do about him now. The Force had given her what it thought she needed to see, but it didn’t change that he was likely to try and kill her the moment her back was turned.

Ben’s voice pressed into her mind, “ _ Are you ok? You feel unsettled _ .”

“ _ I’m fine _ ,” she assured him, gripping his hand tightly. She needed to tell him what happened, but it would have to wait until they were alone.

“The council has been summoned to the throne room as you requested,” a young officer announced, her hand pressed to her headset.

“Shall we go then?” Ben asked and led them all off the bridge and down the hallway.

Rey had to actively resist the urge to peer around with open morbid curiosity as they walked.

She had been on board First Order ships before, but they never failed to make her nervous and uncomfortable. She was welcome this time, and not likely to be on the receiving end of a death sentence today, but the cold and immaculate black corridors were at odds with everything she had known in her life, first as a dirty scavenger and then as a fleeing rebel.

This place ran on order, discipline, and a terrifying adherence to the idea of the sacrificing of one for the benefit of the mission. Individuals were rarely a consideration in this well-oiled war machine, a thought that she found both terrifying and reprehensible.

Everyone was expendable here.

She was still caught in her wandering thoughts when they reached the throne room, long and black and empty except for the large throne and the empty table at which the council members would sit when they arrived. A red and black First Order banner hung behind the throne itself, the only color in the room.

“Trudgen, please escort Edelphi to her new rooms,” Ben instructed quietly, “and then return here. I prefer to keep all of you close until we are certain of Rey’s…Kyra’s safety.” Ben’s orders carried clearly in the quiet of the room and Rey was unsurprised by his correction. Though she would be introduced to the galaxy as Rey, she knew he wanted the First Order members themselves to call her Kyra from the beginning to avoid confusion later.

The knight and the handmaiden left the room as the first council members arrived, each looking surprised at a stranger in their midst, but not daring to question it.

Ben led her toward the throne, which appeared ever larger as they crossed the room toward it, looming up out of the floor with wide armrests and a straight back. He let go of her hand and dropped down in it comfortably, obviously accustomed by now to his place, but she hesitated.

The throne was built for only one.

Hux sat directly beside Ben, leaving the space across from him empty, but by the way the council members were streaming in and dispersing themselves along the table it seemed they all had assigned places.

Her new husband must have sensed her upwelling of uncertainty, because he took her hand and tugged softly until she was perched on the right armrest of the throne itself, which was wide enough to provide her with a comfortable seat of her own. Ben wrapped an arm around her waist, large hand curling possessively around her hip as he settled in and let his long legs spread wide in a position of insolent boredom.

It was carefully cultivated image- master of his domain and casual protector of the woman by his side. No one looking at him would have guessed how tightly his fingers were gripping her waist, or how focused his senses were as he scanned the faces and minds of each person as they entered.

If the council objected to her presence or his obvious display of dominance and possession, they kept it well hidden.

He glanced at her curiously when she jumped beneath his hand as the last member of the council walked calmly through the door and took his place across the table from General Hux, but she shook her head almost imperceptibly. “ _ Not now _ ,” she thought, “ _ I will explain it all to you later _ .”

After a moment’s hesitation he shifted his attention to the council members. “Allegiant General Pryde, how nice of you to finally join us,” he quipped, and Rey saw Hux barely conceal a smirk at his companion’s chastisement.

Pryde narrowed his eyes across the table, and she caught a quickly hidden flicker of rage as he murmured his apologies to the Supreme Leader.

Interesting that there was such animosity between the two generals, Rey mused, especially since it was being revealed to her in such proximity to the Force’s revelations about Hux’s past.

She had recognized Pryde instantly as the man from her vision, the one that she had seen just before she left the Resistance base. Too much had happened since then for her to worry a great deal about an untrustworthy First Order officer, but she could still feel the Force pulsing around him, urging her to remember and pay attention to her feelings about him.

“General Hux, would you care to inform the rest of the council about the recent developments in our plans? I am sure that they are very curious about how things have progressed since our last meeting.”

She frowned at Ben, who seemed unable to resist the opportunity to be confrontational to his general, but he just shrugged.

Hux cleared his throat at Ben’s words, all eyes now watching him curiously. “Kylo Ren, our esteemed Supreme Leader, has returned from the planet of Naboo with a new weapon for the First Order. He has taken a bride-Rey, the scavenger from Jakku that murdered Supreme Leader Snoke.”

The council stared at her in stunned silence.

“I have indeed,” Ben confirmed. “The scavenger- who will after the wedding and coronation be your new Empress and who has chosen the title of Kyra Ren- has been trained as a Jedi and single-handedly murdered Lord Snoke in his own chambers. It would have been a pity to eliminate such strength when it can be swayed to fight for our cause, especially when it comes with intimate knowledge of the Resistance and their tactics. Don’t you agree, General Hux?”

“Of course, Supreme Leader. Any advantage on behalf of the First Order is a welcome one,” Hux lied.

“Now that you have secured this  _ weapon _ , how are we to proceed?” asked Pryde, looking coldly at Rey as she quietly watched the proceedings.

“We will go to Coruscant,” Ben reminded him. “That plan has not changed.”

“It is still in defiance of what Lord Snoke had planned. He did not wish to have the government tied to a single destroyable planet.”

“Lord Snoke,” Hux reminded him, “is dead. While I do not necessarily feel that Coruscant is our best option, we cannot remain rigid in Snoke’s plans. Circumstances have obviously changed and will continue to do so.”

“He’s right,” Rey said, speaking for the first time. “A rigid plan will not be successful if the First Order wants to take full control of the galaxy and eliminate the problem of the Resistance.”

Hux smiled smugly at Pryde while the older man glared angrily at Rey. She could feel a distinct difference in their feelings toward her, with Pryde’s animosity suddenly eclipsing Hux’s by a substantial amount.

“And how do you recommend that we deal with the Resistance?” Pryde bit out with thinly veiled hostility. “All of our efforts so far have failed to crush them, as you know only too well.”

“By not trying to crush them directly, General. Doing so only breeds resentment and swells their ranks. It is better to have a hand that is firm and fair in its leadership than a raised fist. If you abuse those under your control, they are far more likely to respond with violence themselves.”

She swept those in attendance with her gaze, daring them to challenge her assessment. Hux met her eye and a brief, but surprising, look of understanding passed between them.

She reacted on instinct, trusting in the Force and its messages. “Isn’t that right,  _ Allegiant _ General Hux?”

Ben stiffened beside her but didn’t contradict her.

“Yes, that is correct,” Hux began but Pryde spoke over him.

“Forgive me, but I am the only Allegiant General here. General Hux has not yet earned that title.”

“Did you not hear me when I gave it to him? Perhaps you missed his extremely recent promotion?” Rey inquired, far more calmly than she felt inside.

Pryde snapped his mouth shut as Hux smirked at him from across the table.

Ben’s surprise and irritation pounded into her through the bond, and she expected him to undo her order-she wasn’t even sure that she really had the authority to promote anyone-but his next words supported her decision, even if she was sure that Ben himself did not.

“Allegiant General Hux agrees with this new strategy,” Ben announced into the silence that followed. “The galaxy has been thrown from one extreme to the other, from cruel oppression to corrupt passivism, and we will tolerate it no longer. The fleet will leave now for Coruscant, and I will make an announcement before we arrive, an invitation to join us and create a better government.”

“They will never trust you,” predicted an older woman at the far end of the table.

“That’s where I come in,” Rey explained. “We have insight into the message that is most likely to be effective."

“My bride will be a representative of the people,” Ben explained. "This will help convince those who might be undecided. Remember, the systems that choose to join us willingly will withdraw their support for the Resistance. If enough systems withdraw that support, the Resistance will eventually be forced to give up their fight against our control.”

The rest of the meeting passed uneventfully as they discussed the exact contents of the Supreme Leader’s message and the hoped-for results. Within an hour, the council was dismissed to begin preparations.

Pryde stomped out without looking back but Rey stood quickly, appearing to wait for Ben to finish his conversation with a young female officer that seemed to be in charge of communication and First Order propaganda, and casually stepping up beside General Hux before he could leave the room.

“I trust you will enjoy your new position within the First Order, Allegiant General?”

He nodded, looking down at her warily.

“We will all need those who are loyal to us as we make this transition. It is a perilous time for us as all, and it seems that even you have enemies,” she said, looking meaningfully in the direction that General Pryde had gone. “You will have my loyalty and my protection, General, on one condition.”

“What condition?” he asked skeptically.

She turned her head and looked him in the eye, letting him judge for himself the seriousness of her words. “When the time comes, you will help me kill General Pryde.”

He smiled, a vicious look with a hint of respect at the edges. “With pleasure,” he agreed before bowing slightly and leaving the room himself.

Ben waited until everyone had filed out of the room to turn on her in surprise. “What the  _ kriff _ was that?”

“Not here,” she insisted, still suspicious of the First Order and convinced that Pryde especially might be listening to their every word now that there was no longer the sound of other people milling about in conversation to disguise their words.

He let out a rumble from deep in his chest and led her down the maze of corridors to what she assumed was his chambers. He tossed off his cloak and his gloves and waited for an explanation.

She took a deep breath and launched into a semi apologetic rambling story about her visions of Pryde and Hux’s past and the subsequent gut feeling that had led to her decision in the throne room. She conveniently left out the part about her pact with Hux to have Pryde eliminated the moment he became a threat to Ben or their carefully laid plans.

“You promoted Hux, who I have been actively trying to strip of his power for months, because of a few Force visions and a hunch that he may be less dangerous than Pryde?”

“Yes?”

“That’s foolish and impulsive,” he chided, striding around the room and pulling off his tunic as he prepared to make the announcement to the galaxy about his official ascension to the throne.

“It was necessary,” she countered hotly.

“Was it?” he asked silkily, flexing his hands at his sides restlessly at his sides.

“Yes,” she insisted, ignoring the warning signs as warmth curled into her belly at his tone and the sudden heat in his eyes.

He crossed the room in two long strides and swept her into his arms, crushing his mouth to hers. She welcomed it, the sudden rush of his anger and the desire to push and punish her for her foolishness.

He laid her down on the black blankets that draped over his bed and followed her down, nipping hungrily at her lips before he stripped her roughly of her new black dress. He wasn’t calm or patient or gentle this time, as he pushed into her and she bowed beneath him, taking him greedily anyway as he poured his frustration into her with every furious thrust of his hips.

“You are infuriating,” he bit out between clenched teeth. “You just unraveled months’ worth of planning and still this is all I can think about doing to you.”

She gripped his hips and wrapped her legs around him. “Good, I’ll be infuriating forever, just please don’t ever stop doing it.”

His hands on her body were bruising, but he no longer felt guilty, not when she moaned and whimpered her pleasure beneath him at least as much as she did when he was kind and maybe even more.

After he had driven them both to a knife’s edge of combined pleasure that washed away his own irritation, he held her against him and rubbed his cheek against her hair. “We should get dressed. They’re probably already waiting for us,” he mused, pressing a kiss to the ring on her finger.

“They can wait, Supreme Leader,” she assured him, wrapping her arms around his waist and resting her head on his chest to look him in the eyes. “I  _ am _ sorry about Hux.”

“I know,” he said with a sigh. “I trust you, even if I don’t fully understand it.”

***

Leia Organa was holding an emergency meeting of her own when the broadcast began to stream throughout the galaxy.

Threepio burst into the dimly lit room of their most recent hideout, an abandoned village on a dark and swampy planet at the far edges of the outer rim that was now occupied entirely by criminals and deserters that wanted even less to do with the First Order than they did.

“Excuse me, General, but you need to see this! It is being displayed across all frequencies,” he announced, ignoring the groans of the assorted rebels as he flicked on a datapad and held up the display.

A woman’s voice was repeating the same phrase- “Please wait for a proclamation from the First Order”- as Ben stood in front of a large throne. A young redheaded man stood on his right- “General Hux,” Rose spat in disgust- and an older angry looking man stood on his left, both wearing First Order dress uniforms and greatcoats, the shoulders displaying identical rank.

“Where’s Rey?” Finn demanded, searching the display screen for any sign of her. “The spies on Naboo said she was with him, so where is she? What did he do to her? I knew he was pulling some kind of dirty trick!”

Leia ignored him, choking back tears as she stared at the image of her son. Knowing that he had taken on the role of Supreme Leader was different that seeing it with her own eyes. This was the first time that she had seen her son as a man and her heart was breaking as she looked at him, at his handsome face that reminded her so much of his father.

Not that she could deny the amount of herself that she saw in him, too. The man who stood before her might have made Alderaan proud if it still existed and he had not chosen to follow in the footsteps of the men who had overseen its demise. He looked exceptionally regal in a black tunic that was woven through with red thread that shone in the light and a matching thick black cloak with a shining red lining. It wasn’t extravagant, but it was clearly the mark of a man who was more than ordinary.

Silence fell over the room and Kaydel gripped her hand as the woman’s refrain finally faded away and Ben began to speak.

“Rumor has spread across the galaxy that the founder and commander of the First Order, Supreme Leader Snoke, was killed several months ago before the Battle of Crait. I am broadcasting this message to confirm those rumors.”

He took a deep breath and continued, “I am Kylo Ren, Master of the Knights of Ren and the new Supreme Leader of the First Order. I am offering each system in the galaxy the opportunity to join us as we prepare to implement a new and better government.”

“Sure,” Poe grumbled, “we’re all jumping at the chance to give up our freedom to you.”

“I understand that there are atrocities that need to be atoned for, but the government of the Republic has been destroyed and much of the galaxy is already under military control of the First Order. Rather than continue an assault that will only increase the loss of life, I am prepared to seek the willing admission of the rest of the galactic systems, rather than admission by force.”

The Resistance listened in disbelief as he continued, “The First Order is now moving its fleet to Coruscant, where I will be convening a meeting of the delegates of as many systems as are willing to attend. We will be working to establish a government free of oppression or corruption, and the first step is to reinstate a system that includes democratic representation. We all know the failings of the Empire and the failings of the Republics, both Old and New. Every system that sends delegates to Coruscant will have the opportunity to shape the government of the future, as we incorporate the best of both of these systems, while leaving their flaws behind.”

“It’s a trap,” Rose muttered, and Finn nodded in agreement.

“This new government, once established, will no longer be known as the First Order, and I will no longer be the Supreme Leader. These names do not represent my goals for the galaxy, as I work to move beyond the damage done by Snoke as he forced his way into power.”

“He knows he helped with that, right?”

“Shhh,” Leia admonished.

“My coronation as the new Emperor will be a day of great celebration as we all formalize the new system of government that we have worked together to create. One in which I hope a new senate will be able to work with me to achieve a prosperous and peaceful galaxy.”

“Emperor isn’t much better than Supreme Leader, though. What’s the point in having an Emperor  _ and _ a senate? What sort of government is he trying to create?”

“I’m not sure,” Leia admitted, but she knew that the idea of a senate would arouse curiosity in many of the systems, especially because the First Order had much of the galaxy in such a death grip that they could have continued on with their rule as it had been under Snoke and experienced no consequences.

She pursed her lips, contemplating his motives as he held his hand out to someone off screen. The whole room gasped as Rey stepped into view and positioned herself between him and General Hux.

She was dressed simply- a plain white gown that contrasted sharply with the elegance of his attire and her hair in a single braided bun- and appeared to be healthy and content as she held his hand in front of the galaxy.

“To demonstrate my commitment to the improvement of the lives of every citizen in the galaxy, I have decided to take a representative of the people as my wife. Rey of Jakku grew up as a slave and a scavenger, an ordinary citizen who knows how the failures of the government can impact even the most average person. By choosing to have her by my side, I am working to guarantee that the concerns of all citizens will be of equal importance in the decisions that are to come. We will be wed shortly before the coronation, in a ceremony that will be broadcast to the galaxy, so that all citizens can enjoy both celebrations.”

Leia turned away as he promised continuing updates about the progress of the government and which systems had elected to participate, her head whirling as he listed Naboo as the first to commit to sending delegates. She had to admit that his tactics were clever, and there was a high likelihood that he would gather support from a large portion of the galaxy on the back of these choices.

“We knew she was with him,” Rose whispered, turning to Finn as though he might have answers to questions that she couldn’t quite articulate, “but his wife? The spies on Naboo confirmed our suspicions about who she ran to and said they seemed close, probably even intimate, but I still never thought…I didn’t believe she would actually…He’s so horrible.”

Leia shook her head absently, “She looks happy, so he must not be horrible to her. Maybe she sees something that we don’t.”

“But after everything he’s done,” Poe asked, “how could she? It doesn’t make sense.”

“No,” Leia agreed, “it doesn’t, but we all trusted Rey’s judgement before and this senate announcement is an unexpected turn of events. Let’s wait and see what happens.”


	16. A New Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A house is made of wood and beams, a home is made of love and dreams- Unknown

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I increased the chapter count to 35, though realistically I am predicting that it going to be between 35 and 40. My plan was to try and update every week, but I am working on a few other WIPs and it takes me just over a week to cycle through them. I want to get a chapter out for each of the others before I return to this so it probably won't be a week exactly between updates but it will be as quickly as I can.

In the days that followed, many systems decided to put their hope in a future without civil war, each sending news to the First Order fleet that they were assigning delegations to travel to Coruscant and await the convening of the new government.

The tension on board the _ Finalizer _ was palpable. Everyone knew that the fate of the galaxy hung in the balance, with all of the weight resting on how these early systems were treated, because many more systems remained undecided- waiting and watching with a wary eye to see how the talks progressed.

A positive experience would entice these others to join, not reluctantly as they had when they surrendered to an onslaught of violence, but with enthusiasm. An unpleasant experience- a slip in negotiations, an evaluation of the new emperor as too cruel or too weak- and they would all retreat back to their systems and prepare for war.

Rey especially found the trip to her new home to be an anxious one, despite Coruscant’s assurance that they would be among the first to welcome a new regime. Their leadership had been open about their resentment when the capital of the New Republic had been established on Hosnia instead, but she's uncertain how they will be received by the billions of regular citizens that live in what Ben had described as a city so large that it had consumed a whole planet.

She couldn’t imagine what such a thing would look like- a planet that was so full of life that it had consumed everything natural and replaced it with the cold surfaces of durasteel and the impersonal blinking of computer technology.

Would it feel more or less alive than the jungles of Ajan Kloss?

Ben interrupted her musings, nuzzling into her neck as he woke and tightening his arm around her waist. She curled into him, still sated from a night of passion but enjoying the press of his skin against hers. 

“I can feel you worrying already today, is everything alright?”

“Everything is fine. It’s just….”

“Just?”

“It’s just that I’m a little bit worried about Coruscant. What if they don’t like us? What if…what if I don’t like it there?”

“Then we’ll get them to like us,” he assured her, but he wasn’t quick enough to hide his own small ripple of unease as it curled into her through the bond.

“You’re nervous,” she said, wrapping her hand around his with a sigh.

“Not exactly, but I’m sure that there are going to be changes that’d you like to make once you see the planet. I haven’t seen it in years, but it was common knowledge that even in the days of the Old Republic it was…sometimes unpleasant. The upper levels of the planet are comfortable and secure, but the lower levels…”

“Are they unsafe?”

“Very unsafe. It’s ruled by the crime syndicates and the poverty is unimaginable. The trade in spice and other drugs is very lucrative, as is the trafficking of sentient life forms, and where there is money to be had there is also violence.”

“Trafficking of…you mean slavery,” she said, sitting bolt upright and looking down on him accusingly.

“Yes, slavery…some of it for labor, some for exploitative sex work.”

“I was told that slavery was supposed to be illegal under the New Republic, that it only happened in places like Jakku, away from their eyes and without their knowledge,” she hissed. “Coruscant is a core planet!”

“Slavery was illegal, but the laws were not well enforced. You knew that there was corruption in the Republic, too many people willing to turn a blind eye for profit and a government too weak to stop it. That's part of why you decided to leave the Resistance. Your life on Jakku was tragic and lonely, but Coruscant and others suffered far worse fates.”

She flopped back down on the bed next to him with a groan. “Rose told me once about what the First Order did to her planet, stripping it of resources and using it to test their weapons, and I thought that there couldn’t be anything worse than that. I was so ready to believe in the Republic as an ideal, to fight for it, but it wasn’t what it pretended to be, either.”

“Everyone has been torn apart with the consequences of imbalance, and it’s apparently our job to fix it, but it's going to be difficult. The problems on Coruscant are horrible but still minor compared to what we're facing, just a small reflection of the same problems that we will face when we look at the galaxy as a whole.”

“What are we going to do?”

“If it was just me? I would clear the lower levels, send in troops to hunt down the crime syndicates and the slavers and make an example of them before the rest of the galaxy. Let everyone who opposes the law see the penalty... then burn it down. A fresh start.”

She swallowed a rising wave of nausea at the thought. “What about the rest of them? You said there was unimaginable poverty on the lower levels, what would happen to those people? The children?”

He shrugged. “I don’t think it could be any worse than what they’re going through already.”

She shook her head, unable to imagine anything worse than being burned out of your home and losing what little you had.

“There was plenty of crime on Jakku, and there were some, like Plutt, who benefited from it, but most were simply hungry and trying to survive. Programs to help them, to feed and educate them, would be kinder.”

“But would it be as effective? Education might help in the long term, if the people live long enough to benefit from it, but not if they’ve been sold or killed.”

She bit back a sharp retort, taking a deep breath before she answered. “The dark side impulse is cruel,” she began holding up a silencing hand when he began to protest, “but the light side impulse is weak.”

He nodded, beginning to understand where her thoughts had taken her. “We have to find the middle road, the one that eliminates the immediate threat…”

“But doesn’t destroy the long term hopes of the people,” she finished. “Which means not burning the lower levels and putting programs in place to help feed and educate those in need.”

“The galaxy is ours now and I protect what’s mine, so it also means strict punishments for those who exploit our people,” he insisted. “Making a profit on the backs of slaves and those who are destitute and desperate is going to be unacceptable."

She shivered a bit at the tone and the immovable current of dark energy that swirled around him, but couldn’t fault him for it, not really, so she nodded in agreement. “We’ll begin on Coruscant, and if it works, we’ll apply the same strategy to crime in the rest of the galaxy.”

He pressed a kiss to her bare shoulder. “We should know soon how much of a task is ahead of us, we’ll arrive at Coruscant in a few hours.”

Rey spent most of that time preparing, since Edelphi insisted that a future empress should dress to impress when arriving at her future home. “All of the people will come out to see you and the Emperor. They’ll be excited, of course, but also apprehensive and unsure of their own safety. The last Emperor was cruel to everyone and they have not forgotten.

“How do you know all of this?” Rey asked, watching in fascination as her hair was twisted and plaited into a complicated braided crown with small wisps left free to frame her temples.

“All of her Majesty’s ladies are trained in etiquette, politics, fashion, and combat. I may not have been old enough to commit to such a life when the new queen was crowned, but my sister passed along small bits of information to me.”

Rey laughed, the deception in Edelphi’s tone was obvious and conspiratorial. “Small bits? Only as much as allowed, I’m sure.” Her servant winked and sent Rey into fresh giggles. “There’s certainly no stopping the women of Naboo. I’m glad to have you with me.”

“I’m glad to be here, Lady Kyra.”

Rey blinked once in bemusement, still unaccustomed to the title, but she knew that was the point. No one but Ben had called her by her real name since the day they left Naboo.

Edelphi finished quickly with her makeup- “A light touch for now, we want the people to see you as innocent, vulnerable…one of them”- and then it was time for Rey to step into another gown. This one was nearly as simple as the one she had worn on her wedding day. It was not quite time to worry about the heavier, more formal dresses just yet.

The fabric was light blue and flowy and cut to leave her shoulders exposed while long puffed sleeves ended in several inches of tight cuff at the wrist. A tight bodice that hugged all the way to the hip flared into a floor length skirt that rippled with her every move.

“I would have felt better in one of the black training outfits that was designed for me, something with leggings and boots and a belt for my saber. I can’t even hide a blaster with this thing on,” Rey muttered. The dress was beautiful, but if the citizens of Coruscant were unwelcoming, she would have no means of self-defense.

“You need not worry about that. I heard the guards talking while they were running around the corridors this morning. There will be battalions of stormtroopers from the fleet that will make planetfall before the royal shuttle. You’ll be safe and well protected.”

Rey shifted irritably, “I’m a fighter, not a pretty trinket.”

“That is only your pride, Lady Kyra. Do not allow it to strip you of one of your greatest advantages before the delegates arrive. Lord Ren loves you, and his supporters have decided that you are useful, but the galactic systems have not yet decided. Some of them will undoubtedly come with malice and anger, perhaps even thoughts of revenge against the First Order.”

“Isn’t that just even more reason for me to have a weapon?” Rey huffed.

“You  _ are _ a weapon,” Edelphi challenged with a small smile, “but a different kind than Lord Ren. He’s like a blaster- intimidating and feared immediately because his strength is obvious- but he is indelicate and causes damage to anything around him. You are much more subtle- a veiled threat that is often overlooked by the foolish and capable of making precise cuts.”

Rey eyed her lightsaber and considered the usefulness of such a weapon, as Edelphi expertly wove a red ribbon around the tight bodice of her gown, crisscrossing the blue with her husband's signature shade of crimson and ending it in a small bow that rested against her right hip.

The overall effect matched the red and blue stones in her ring perfectly. She had been worried that she would need to remove it to maintain the illusion that they were not yet married, but Ben had assured her that the ring would be viewed as a symbol of their engagement, with a second simple metal band to be added at the official royal ceremony.

“The queen recognized the duality of your nature immediately, because every handmaiden on Naboo is trained to be the same. Beautiful but absolutely deadly. No ever suspects what such a delicate looking woman is capable of, and we use it to our advantage. That’s why she gifted you with this.”

Edelphi reached into the pocket of her own simple blue gown and pulled out the headpiece that Rey had worn the day that Ben had arrived on Naboo for the wedding. The stones, set in a pattern of glittering red flowers, glinted dully in the ship’s artificial lighting as she placed it on Rey’s head.

“These are oleander from Nerium, a rare desert flower that is prized across the galaxy for their incredible loveliness, but they are inescapably fatal if ingested. A single leaf is enough to kill a grown man. It is untraceable and there is no antidote.”

Rey tipped her head and studied the jeweled flowers in the mirror. “A deadly force hidden in plain sight,” she mused.

“One that would do well not to reveal its secrets too soon. For now, the people need you as a symbol of themselves, as delicate and vulnerable as they feel during so much upheaval. As you grow stronger, and you will when you rise as empress and a warrior, they will feel their own confidence in themselves grow. If they love you and relate to you, then when Lord Ren loves you, it will be as though he loves them by extension.”

“I’m afraid I wasn’t made to think like a politician.” So far she had blundered her way through on wit and instinct, but she worried that it might not be enough to see her through the coming days and their challenges. Knowing what they needed to accomplish was far different from being able to manage it. 

“You will learn,” was all Edelphi said as she bent to fluff Rey’s skirt.

They both froze at an unfamiliar noise coming from the door to the bedchamber.

“Someone is trying to get in,” Edelphi hissed, pushing Rey away from the door and tiptoeing closer suspiciously. An ominous scraping was clearly emanating from the bottom of the door.

“What? Why would someone be trying to sneak into the bedchamber of the future emperor? That’s a death sentence!” Rey whispered back furiously.

“Maybe they think to kill you before we reach Coruscant!”

“Then they have miscalculated my willingness to die,” Rey muttered, reaching for the borrowed red saber that had been resting on the desk in front of her and igniting it. “Open the door, and we’ll introduce them to their mistake.”

Rey raised the saber defensively as Edelphi pressed the button and the door sprang aside with a hiss to reveal an empty corridor.

“What?” Rey lowered the saber in confusion but a rumbling blur of orange darted in to dance around their ankles, startling both of them.

“Oh,” Edelphi breathed in relief, “it’s just a lothal cat.”

“A cat?” Rey bent closer to examine the animal and was amused to discover that the rumble was an apparent noise of contentment. “Where would a cat have come from on a dreadnought?”

The answer appeared quickly enough.

“Millie? Millicent, where are you?!” The indignant hissing echoed down the corridor just as General came into view from around the nearest corner, bent low and searching the shadows.

Rey stifled a giggle as Edelphi called out helpfully, “Have you lost something, General?”

He snapped upright. “I have not,” he snapped tersely. “Why would you ask such a thing?”

Edelphi grinned at him unrepentantly. “I just thought that perhaps the cat that has wandered into the royal chambers might be yours? If not, then I suppose we will have to call a few stormtroopers to have it removed.” 

“You found Millicent?”

“Lothal cat? Orange and rumbly?”

He slumped in defeat. “I’m not allowed to have her on board, so if you could keep this incident confident..” He trailed off with a sigh as Rey poked her own head out the door.

“Allegiant General Hux, what a surprise.”

“My apologies, Lady Kyra,” he said stiffly. “She escaped as I was trying to prepare her for transfer to the planet. Lord Ren has asked that I remain on Coruscant for a time to assist in getting the city settled.”

“At my request,” she informed him, and watched the surprise flash across his face before he smoothed his expression into its customary practiced stoicism. “We will need a calculating mind to help settle the citizens. Ruthless enough to route out those who profit on other people’s suffering, but not so bloodthirsty as to unnecessarily hurt the children and the innocents. I’m certain that you were a better option than Pryde.”

He puffed up with pride at her praise. “Yes, my lady, of course. I’m happy to help.” A quick brush of her mind against his was enough to assure her that he meant it.

Millicent wandered into the corridor and he looked at Rey anxiously as he bent to lift the pet into his arms.

“I didn’t see you or the cat,” she promised him. “Though if you wish to take her with you on future assignments please let me know. I can arrange for special exceptions.”

The cat mewled happily as he bowed deeply before carrying her away.

“There may be something kind and decent buried under that cold exterior,” Edelphi mused."The cat seemed to like him well enough."

“I hope so, now that I know how much power Pryde has, I have a feeling I’m going to need him far more than I could have ever imagined. My vision was unquestionably clear about how little I can trust Pryde.”

“Now you’re thinking like a politician, my lady.”

Rey hoped that it was true because the time for learning was rapidly dwindling. They were hovering above Coruscant within the hour, and Rey had pressed a hand to her stomach to still the nerves as she stood on the bridge beside her stoic faced husband and stared down at the bustling chaos of the largest city she had ever seen.

“I can feel them, all of them. It’s awful,” she complained, overwhelmed by the flood of information that had rushed into her senses as they approached the planet.

“I felt the same way the first time my mother brought me here, but it gets easier with time.”

“I hope so,” she said, tucking her hand in the crook of his elbow and watching quietly as streams of transports left the First Order fleet and descended to the surface.

“They will begin by securing the palace and the surrounding areas,” Ben told her, sensing her unasked question. “The rest of the planet will continue as usual, under the direction of the High Chancellor, until we are ready to institute our own policy changes.”

She nodded. “Will the High Chancellor cooperate with our plans?”

“He will if he wants to keep his job,” Ben said flatly. “If he objects then he will be replaced.”

“I suppose we will have to worry about that when we get that far, we have to made it safely to the palace first.”

“We will,” he promised, but it was a promise more easily made than fulfilled, which he seemed to realize as they finally stepped off his personal shuttle and onto the planet's surface.

They had decided to land in what had once been the Emperor’s own official port, a wide and open space that had been designed to be open to the public view and which required a long walk to the front steps of the palace along an easily observed pathway. There were many more subtle landing areas closer to the palace that were convenient for personal travel, but this was for formal occasions when the goal was to be seen by the people.

“I’m sure you are going to miss this shuttle,” she said with a laugh as they walked down the ramp to the pathway that was lined with stormtroopers on high alert. A large crowd had gathered and they were pressing in on both sides, held at bay only by the stern line of white helmets.

“What? Why?”

“It’s recognizable and now everyone in the galaxy knows it’s ours. It will only be useful for official emperor business.”

He frowned but there was no denying it. His shuttle was distinct among the First Order, having a sleek silhouette that resembled a large bird of prey. “Kriff,” he muttered. “Being lord of all the known universe comes with unpleasant sacrifices.”

She snorted but continued to smile and wave as they passed the throng of people that were all pushing a shoving to get a glimpse of them. She could barely even hear him over the noise, despite him leaning down close enough that she could feel the warmth of his breath on her ear.

“I’m sorry for your loss, your worshipfulness,” she quipped loudly, “but at least you are not making this walk in a gown and trying to be a perfectly relatable symbol to all of the sentient beings in that known universe.”

He barked out a laugh and pressed a kiss to her check, causing the crown to erupt into approving cheers.

“They seem to be quite fond of you already,” he noted.

“We want them to be fond of you, too. It’s good for them to see you behaving kindly, it will lessen the temptation to compare you to Palpatine.”

“Or Vader,” he agreed grimly, though the shadow that passed across his face was not as dark as it had once been. “Though we walk a fine line between kindness and weakness.”

Before Rey could reply a shout of warning came from behind them as the Knights of Ren, who had been following them closely since they had stepped off the shuttle, drew their weapons and crowded around them in a protective circle.

A scuffle had broken out between the crowd and the stormtroopers, halfway between them and the shuttle they had left behind.

“Go,” Ben commanded the knights, “help hold the line. The other troopers can’t abandon their posts without leaving weak spots elsewhere and endangering more lives.”

She could feel the men's reluctance to leave them unprotected, but they knew he was right. They rushed forward, and the aggressive crowd fell back, intimidated by the blank facelessness of their masks and the cutting edges of their weapons.

“Come on. Let’s get inside so the crowd will disperse, we don’t want any bloodshed today.”

She didn’t breathe easily again until they were inside the palace and the doors and been barred behind them.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you are enjoying this story my other WIPs might also interest you!
> 
> I have a dark!Rey fic set after the events of TROS  
> Fire in Her Eyes-  
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/23865442
> 
> and I have a beautifully angsty modern au that has really captured my whole heart!  
> One of the Dangerous Ones-  
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/24341002


	17. First Moves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In politics, nothing happens by accident. If it happens, you can bet it was planned that way- Franklin D. Roosevelt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanted to say, once again, how much I appreciate everyone's love and support on this fic! You all are what keeps me going and I couldn't do this without all of you. 
> 
> I've got a few smaller projects going and that's taken a lot of my brain space and energy this week so please forgive this largely unplanned chapter that does very little to advance the plot and is just designed to give you all a little fluff and smut before we get into heavy politics and angst. After this we will be getting heavy into the second act and we need a little love before we get into that. (Ben still hasn't even faced his mother yet!)
> 
> If you enjoy dark fairytales you can check out the one I just finished (one of the things that took up so much my time this week)- https://archiveofourown.org/works/25494046
> 
> You can also follow me on Twitter @Love_andbalance for story updates on the next stories I am working in which include another little fairytale that's in the works, a drabble for the Reylo Folklore Collection (I'm doing the song Exile), and a mafia au with enemies to lovers and one bed tropes. (or you could just subscribe to me here!)

“Well…it’s ugly.”

Rey stood in the center of their new chambers, the largest and most expansive in the palace and the ones that had once been Palpatine’s, with her hands on her hips and a scrunched up nose.

Ben grunted in agreement, eyeing the dated colors and horrible furnishings with distaste. It had neither the stark bareness of the First Order ships nor the antique romance of their time on Naboo. It reeked of the Empire and the government’s tendencies toward tasteless overindulgence.

“We’ll get someone to redo it,” he promised. “The whole palace if that’s what you want, though it seems like the rest was made fairly decent after this became the home for the chancellor instead of the Imperial Palace.”

“Didn’t someone live here? And where did the chancellor move to, if we moved in here?”

He shook his head. “No one was brave enough to move into Palpatine’s old rooms, though he was rarely ever here, and I don’t feel any lingering dark side power.” She nodded her agreement, letting her certainness that Palpatine must have kept his secrets elsewhere stretch out to him across the bond. “As for the chancellor, he moved back into the old chancellor’s apartments in the Senatorial District. Every senator and high-ranking government official had assigned living quarters. I sent word ahead that those would need to be restored and prepared for new arrivals as soon as possible. For now, it will house the delegates.”

“That’s a good plan, but I assume the chancellor was unhappy about that,” Rey mused.

“He will be more unhappy before all is said and done,” Ben predicted. “The changes we intend to make here are going to challenge a great deal of his authority.”

“If the people here are starving and living under the control of the crime syndicates, his authority  _ needs _ to be challenged.”

Her eyes took on the familiar gleam that they always had when she was plotting some new way to overturn everything to suit her purposes, but he didn’t ask. She’d tell him what her plans were once she’d worked out all the details.

Ben walked to the doors that led to a large balcony overlooking the city. He could still hear the excited rumble of the crowd outside, but fortunately there hadn’t been any further eruptions of violence and they had been able to take a quick tour of the main parts of the palace before being shown to their new living quarters.

Rey’s rooms were technically still across the hall, since no one knew that they were married and he was well aware that the palace servants were not as loyal as First Order personnel, which made them far less likely to keep their mouths shut on juicy gossip.

He turned his head to look down at Rey when she slipped her hand into his and squeezed his fingers gently. “Those are our people,” she said quietly, and he knew that the reality of that responsibility was going to hit her harder in the next few days, now that she had a ring on her finger and faces to put to the nebulous concept.

“They are,” he agreed, “but only a very small portion of them.”

She sighed deeply but did not turn her face away from the door and the cacophony of voices. She tipped her chin up, her regal posture and elegant clothing making her look every inch an empress.

He tugged on the ribbon that wound around her waist. “Look at this gown, it's so proper," he teased. "Where’s my feral desert gremlin? My moody little scavenger?”

She laughed and twirled beside him, skirt flaring gently as she did so. “I have become a well-polished piece of treasure that you pulled from the sands! I have no more time to be moody and feral.” Her eyes twinkled with mischief. 

“You are, and beautiful, but…” he deliberately let his voice trail off on a note of doubt and she stopped spinning with a frown.

“But?”

“I don't want to lose  _ you _ in all of that finery. I wanted so desperately to save you, to keep you happy and spoiled, but now…” he shrugged a shoulder at her, not looking at her face as she stepped in front of him, feet planted apart and arms crossed over her chest.

“And now you want me to be  _ less _ spoiled?”

“No, of course not. I want to give you everything, to drape you in silks and jewels and worship the soft pampered curves of your skin. I just never want you to lose that wild look in your eyes.” He suddenly realized that maybe he wasn't teasing her after all. He couldn't stand it if she became cold and aloof like his mother.

“Has it gone?” She dropped her arms and tucked her bottom lip between her teeth.

“Not always, but you are often sad- weighted down in all you have done and in all we have left to do. I would rather have you always be fearless and wild.” He cupped her cheek in his hand and she leaned into his touch. It soothed him a little, how eagerly she still loved him. She was regal, but her heart was not yet made of stone.

“I’ve always been sad,” she countered. “Now I am simply softer than I had to be back then. I'm happy and in love these days.”

“So, you will only look at our enemies with fire in your eyes?” he goaded, pleased to see amused irritation flit across her face. He enjoyed provoking her, urging her to bare her teeth and claws, as much as he loved nuzzling into her when she was soft and brimming with affection.

Her moods were mercurial, and he adored them all.

“I have a different kind of fire for you now,” she promised huskily. “ _ Only _ for you.”

He wrapped his fingers around her wrist and tugged her forward until she was pressed against his chest and he could feel the swell of her breasts as they rose and fell with her breathing. “Show me”, he challenged. “Show me the woman that is not only a well-loved wife, but also a lover, a warrior, an empress.” He pressed a memory into her mind, one that he tucked away into the deepest and most private recesses of his mind, of her kneeling before him with his blood on her lips and the sparkle of stars as her halo. He was loved by a goddess, challenged by the only woman in the galaxy who could ever have been his equal.

Her eyes darkened with desire, undone to see herself as he saw her, and she sent her own memory sliding along the bond to nestle beside his own. Her perspective of that moment, his face as he stared down at her, at once commanding and awed. The only man before whom she would ever kneel.

He clutched her to him, lifting her until her legs wrapped around his waist and she clung to him fiercely while he walked, bumping into door frames and furniture in the unfamiliar chambers.

Rey hummed against his mouth and vibrated with excitement as she sank her teeth into his lip. It sent flames of need licking along his nerves and pure lust pooling in his stomach. She was a wild thing and that while she prized his love, she needed his darkness to dance with her own.

She growled in frustration when he backed her into yet another wall. “Just stop,” she panted, “forget the bed. Here…just right here, right now.”

He smiled against the skin of her neck, biting down on the sensitive flesh as he pushed the delicate fabric of her gown up around her waist, bunching it in his fist and tugging it out of the way so that his free hand could have access to the hot welcome between her thighs. Her undergarments tore on the first strong tug, and then his fingers were buried in her as she keened with pleasure and writhed greedily against his hand.

He pinned her there until he had worked her climax from her, and his hand was dripping with the wet evidence of her desire. Her eyes dazed when he set her on her feet, but when he tried to urge her toward their new bed she resisted firmly.

“I said here,” she reminded him, sinking to her knees and working to rapidly undo the fastenings of his pants.

“Rey, we can…” he began, but he drifted off on a moan when her fingers caressed the bare skin of his arousal, and she wasted no time wrapping her mouth around his aching hardness.

She was no longer uncertain and hesitant, as she had been the first time, her movements were practiced and confident now as she quickly brought him to the edge of his own peak and then held him there, watching him with love and power in her eyes.

_ I can’t…I’m going to…  _ he thought in panic, trying to tug her back to her feet, but unable to budge her from her spot on the floor, although something in his mind acknowledged that he wasn’t trying too hard.

_ Yes,  _ she encouraged, her mind baring her own desires to him as her hands and her mouth suddenly increased in their intensity.

He had never done this before, not with her or with any of the faceless women who had come before her, but he couldn’t stop it from happening and realized with surprise that she didn’t want him to. The sudden rush of warmth through his body and the flood of his release as it coated her tongue sent a shudder of pleasure through both of them.

He trembled when she ran her tongue across the tip of him to collect the last of stray drops of his climax and swallowed it down with a hum of satisfaction.

_ “Kriff,  _ Rey you didn’t have to do that.”

“I know I didn't  _ have _ to, but I  _ wanted _ to.” She looked so flushed and pleased with herself that it made him chuckle a little as he picked her up from the floor and finally navigated them successfully to the main bedchamber.

She kissed him passionately, and a thrill raced through him when he realized he could taste himself on her tongue, before she wiggled free of his grasp and set about exploring the room, finally discovering the drawer that held her sleepwear and picking out a sheer black nightgown.

“I think you’re trying to kill me,” he said with a little shake of his head when she emerged from the fresher. The gown covered her from neck to knee, but every curve was clearly visible and he could see the pink of her nipples clearly through the fabric.

She grinned unrepentantly. “If I was still trying to kill you, I’d use the lightsaber that you so politely provided for me.”

“Undoubtedly, but where is your saber?” he asked, realizing for the first time that she had no way to carry it in the gown she had worn today.

“I’m sure it was brought down with the rest of our things. There wasn’t really a way to carry it with this dress. I have lots of training outfits but most of my more formal gowns weren’t designed to be worn with it. I don’t think the seamstresses thought I would need it for palace dinners and Senate meetings.”

“You need it everywhere,” he grumbled. “It is traditional for most politicians to be unarmed and rely on their guards, but only _in_ _theory_. In reality, they likely have whatever can be smuggled past security. You’re not a Senator, or even a queen, you’re the empress and you can wear a lightsaber openly with any gown you choose. I’m surprised you did not do so anyway.”

“I wanted to, but…”

“Then why didn’t you?”

“Edelphi suggested that it might be better for me to appear a bit helpless on our arrival. I am a representative of the people, and when I appear as vulnerable as they feel they bond to me. If they do, then my ascension to the throne and growing power will make them feel more confident instead of threatened. That can only help our plans.”

He considered that for a moment. “I’m not surprised that Edelphi would view it that way. Naboo is notorious for their successful management of their people’s loyalties and their stealthy political strategies. My mother was always deeply impressed by how deadly the queen’s women were, though few outside of Naboo were aware of it, a weapon hidden in plain sight.”

“That’s what Edelphi said. She told me that the queen thought I reminded her of these flowers.” Rey indicated the jeweled red blossoms in her hair. “Beautiful but deadly.”

He remembered thinking that they suited her perfectly the first time he saw her wear that headpiece and how he wanted to plant them for her on Coruscant when they arrived. He had no clue what they were, but it seemed that the queen had the same idea.

“She’s right, but you don’t have to be weaponless to achieve those goals. You’ll be safer and more powerful armed, and we can find ways to keep your deadly secrets.” He sat down on the side of their bed, watching as she tugged the flowers from her hair and ran a brush through the brown waves. It had grown since he had first seen it down on the Supremacy and was now well past her shoulders.

“I don’t think Padme was armed,” she said, turning to look at him with a frown, “and neither is the current queen. I want to do this right; people are depending on us. Maybe my brash tendencies aren’t what we need right now.”

He saw it now and felt it as it overflowed the tight lock she had over her emotions, the deep concern that she felt. Fear over being inadequate to the task that had been handed her.

She had risen to the need so spectacularly since she had left the Resistance that he had forgotten that she had left Jakku less than a full year ago. She had no training or experiences in politics, the Force, or even relationships of any kind, and yet here she sat as a wife, an empress, and a Force sensitive warrior that was prepared to undo the great legacies of the Jedi and the Sith. She must be overwhelmed at times, but she had never given any indication.

He wondered if she acknowledged it even to herself.

“People are depending on  _ you _ ,” he told her gently, “not on Padme, or my mother, or Luke, or the queen of Naboo. The Force didn’t choose them, it chose you and me. We can learn from them, but we have to follow our own instincts. That’s what brought us together. So, what do your instincts tell you?”

She thought hard for several moments, brows knit together in concentration. “I’m not sure. I do know that I have learned a lot of good things that seem right to me. I learned leadership from Leia and the importance of admitting to failure from Luke. From Naboo, I learned that the will of the people can be molded with careful thought and a loving hand if they know you are acting in their best interests. Edelphi taught me not to show all of my strengths immediately, that sometimes it's better to let yourself appear vulnerable and relatable.”

He nodded. “And what did you learn from me?”

“To let the past die, to kill it if I had to. To take what is mine, embrace my own darkness, and never fear who I am.”

“You’re Rey. My own Kyra, Mistress of the Knights of Ren, Empress of the known galaxy.”

She dropped the brush and stepped between his knees, peering down at him as she spoke. “I would have been less frightened today with a weapon of my own. It’s not that I don’t trust you and my guard, but I shouldn’t have to. I should be able to protect you as much as you protect me.”

“Is that what your instincts tell you?”

“Yes, but I don’t want to lose the advantage of surprise. The delegates do not need to know that I am armed.”

He tucked wrapped his arms around her waist and rubbed his cheek against the soft material of nightgown. “Then we’ll figure it out.”

***

He left their chambers before she woke the next morning, pressing a kiss to her cheek as she slept peacefully. She needed rest after all the upheaval in her life recently. After a moment of consideration, he took her flower crown with him, an idea simmering at the back of his mind.

Vicrul and Trudgen stood guard outside the door, waiting patiently in the corridor.

“Any news?” he asked.

“Only what you expected. It looks like the Chancellor has several of the servants snooping around this part of the palace. They certainly weren’t cleaning and ran off when they saw us. There’s no telling how much he offered to pay them for bringing information about you and Kyra.”

Trudgen nodded his agreement once Vicrul finished speaking. “We didn’t follow them. We thought it would be best if they carried back the information that your personal guards are on duty in this part of the palace. I would not trust the palace guards at all. The stormtroopers outside are probably the only thing preventing them from letting the masses inside to loot the place. Probably hoping it would force you to flee or that someone would kill you in the fight.”

Ben sighed and pressed his fingers to his eyes. “The people are hungry, and they would come for whatever they could get their hands on and he knows it. They are grateful the government has returned but that is not enough to gain their true loyalty when they have empty stomachs. We’ll have to get food brought in as soon as possible, that’s the first step in calming the masses and winning their allegiance. Even as it stands now, the chancellor cannot oppose us outright without risking their anger himself, but he is furious about being removed from the palace and having the eye of the Supreme Leader so close to his dealings.”

“You think he’s corrupt?”

“I think the crime syndicates pay him to look the other way,” Ben said.

“What would you like for us to do?”

“One of you and six stormtroopers will always be at Kyra’s side, at least for now. Take turns. When you’re not here or sleeping, roam the lower levels of the city. Kill only who you must but find out what you can about the crime syndicates and how the chancellor is connected. I promised Kyra we’d keep it clean, but we need to get that area dealt with for her safety.”

They nodded, and he could feel their excitement rolling off of them. This was the sort of thing they lived for.

Vicrul stayed behind with instructions on where to send Rey when she woke, and Trudgen left to summon the next knight to replace them.

At the entrance to their wing of the palace, Kylo waved down a group of stormtroopers. Six were sent to guard his chambers, six to find the best jeweler on Coruscant, and six to find the best blade maker.

“Stay on the upper levels for now,” he cautioned them. “Oh, and someone find me a gardener! I’ll be waiting in the throne room.”


	18. Breaking Ground

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spectacular achievement is always preceded by unspectacular preparation- Robert H. Schuller

Ben was waiting for her in the throne room on board the  _ Finalizer. _

It seemed that as soon as they had arrived on Coruscant, they had been forced to leave. The planet’s needs and level of tumultuous unrest had been greatly underestimated. The majority of the population was near to starving at best, and open revolt in the streets was a distinct possibility.

“They need food,” Ben had said tiredly on the third morning after their arrival.

“They do,” she had agreed, leaning up on her elbow to kiss him good morning. He had begun to worry about the day’s problems before even swinging his feet out of bed. “We’ll get them some.”

“Where are we going to get enough food for this many people? And why has no trade agreement been established here?”

“I’m sure there was one,” she had told him, propping her chin on his chest, and watching him seriously. “There must have been, under the Old Republic and the Empire, or the city would not have grown so large. If it lapsed, it was because of the Chancellor. I know for a fact that the poor and hungry are easy to manipulate. It keeps them comfortably under the thumbs of the crime syndicates if they are too busy fighting one another for crumbs to stand up against those who take advantage of them.”

“So, to weaken the grip of the slaver and drug traders, we need a lot of food and planned distribution points,” he had sighed.

“They’ll kill each other to get to it if you don’t make it easy to access, at least at first. Don’t make them stand in line too long.”

“Lots of food and lots of distribution points,” he had amended.

They had left Hux in charge to take care of planning and distribution, and he had bowed stiffly to Ben before relaxing slightly and uttering a muffled, “Empress.”

“I will do my best to ensure that adequate arrangements are made,” he had promised.

“General?” Rey had asked before he could leave.

“Yes?”

“Please try to set up as many distribution points for children as possible.”

He had looked at her, a spark of approval in his eyes. “Of course, I had already planned guarded stations for them to come and eat. The adults are likely to steal the food from them otherwise.”

“Thank you.”

He had left quickly, but he had paused to nod politely at Edelphi as he did so, and the young woman’s blush had been visible from across the room.

‘He likes you,” Ben had muttered.

“He likes her more, I think,” Rey had said with a smile.

“Should I warn him off?” Ben’s look had been thunderous, but Rey had frowned at him just as fiercely.

“Don’t you dare,” she’d hissed. “Edelphi can handle him.”

Ben had remained doubtful, but Rey had been firm.

They had left the planet much less conspicuously than they had arrived, choosing to use the smaller landing pad at the side of the palace rather than making the long official walk to Ben’s command shuttle.

He had sighed wistfully as they settled into a smaller shuttle that was standard First Order issue, but this let them move about with much more anonymity, and they had been determined that the chancellor should not be told of their absence.

They had identified a small system nearby that had great potential but was notorious for refusing to trade with other planets. The inhabitants were food rich, money poor, and proud, which is why they had decided to go personally rather than send representatives.

Initial negotiations had not gone well.

The planet’s leader, a young elected official that Rey had thought might have seemed entirely human had it not been for the greenness of his skin and the two extra eyes set in the center of his large forehead, had been immovable in the face of Ben’s best persuasive speech.

“Others have come before you, Supreme Leader Kylo Ren, and have failed. We do not trade with outsiders. My people do not need help and we will not depend on Coruscant for our survival.”

“You would not be dependent on Coruscant,” Rey had said quietly.

She had been seated beside Ben at the long table, expertly crafted to be sturdy but plain. There had been a dirt floor beneath her boots, even in the leader's own home, and she had not looked out of place in even her most basic training outfit. She had understood those people and their need to be self-sufficient. They were farmers primarily, with perhaps a few necessary craftsmen, and they had needed no one to give them their worth when they earned it from the sweat and blood of their labors.

The lower set of the king’s eyes had swiveled to focus on Rey, while the upper set had remained unblinkingly focused on Ben.

“The people of Coruscant would be dependent on you,” Rey had told him honestly. “We are willing to pay you for what you're able to provide, but it is no charity. The people there are starving, and we need your help.”

He had hesitated, considering her offer in the new light of being charitable rather than receiving aid.

“We could send food if your people need our help,” he had said slowly, clearly debating how much assistance they could offer. “We could let some of them come here, too, if you think they might want the chance to earn an honest living.” He rubbed a hand over his chin, as if thinking it over. “Our planet is still mostly unsettled, but very fertile, as you’ve seen. We could grow a lot more crops if we had more people to work the land.”

“The people of Coruscant have likely never seen a plant grow,” Rey had told him. “The planet has no vegetation left, so they would have a lot to learn, but if it meant food and safe living conditions, some might come.”

Ben had nodded, “Especially the young, or those eager to start their own families.”

“We could use that kind here. Assuming, of course, that they need a place to go.”

“You are providing us a great service,” Rey had assured him. “The people will be grateful for your kindness.”

He had puffed up slightly, pride evident on his features. “We are glad to help those in need.”

“Will you be sending delegates to Coruscant?” Ben had asked. “We would be honored to have this system represented in our new government, and certainly everyone would benefit from the presence of such a wise and helpful people.”

“We would be happy to have your finest representative return to the capital with us on board our ship, if you wish? I know we have several newly refurbished living spaces available for delegates.” Rey’s smile was blinding, and the leader’s hesitation melted away.

“You were one of us,” he had told her with a nod, “a citizen of the galaxy that struggled under the old ways. If you think there’s hope under this new government, then we’ll give it a try.”

The  _ Finalizer _ had left the planet within hours, an entourage of two delegates and assorted guards aboard, and was followed afterward by several smaller cargo ships filled to the brim with food.

Another such shipment was scheduled for every week following.

It would be enough to take the edge off the hunger of Coruscant’s citizens, especially if they could implement relocation programs. Other planets might also be seeking new settlers to help with labor or replenish populations depleted by war.

She would mention it this meeting if Ben did not, and they would see what the High Council thought.

They all seemed to be present in the throne room, except Hux, whose attendance was being conducted through a holopad on the table in front of his seat.

Even from Coruscant, he glared spectacularly at General Pryde as Rey made her way across the room to settle next to Ben on the throne. She considered settling onto the arm of the chair, as she had last time, but changed her mind at the last moment and curled herself onto his lap with as much dignity as she could maintain.

Ben tried to repress a surprise chuckle and almost everyone else in the room responded by looking away respectfully or sneaking a glance with fond smiles. They had all quickly gotten used to the genuine affection between the Supreme Leader and his bride, especially since it kept Kylo Ren in such a good mood.

Only General Pryde narrowed his eyes at the openly loving display.

“Do not look at my wife like that again, General.”

Pryde coughed slightly, turning his face away to hide his embarrassment as Hux sneered at him. Rey felt no pity. She was still absolutely certain that he meant to harm them all, but she had no proof of it, so she was forced to wait and bide her time.

She exchanged a brief but meaningful look with the hologram of Hux, and she knew he would be ready whenever she indicated that it was the right time.

“Our trip was quite successful. Thanks to Kyra’s careful words and innate negotiation skills, we have a vital supply of food for Coruscant and a program that might be replicated elsewhere to both relieve overcrowding at the capital and return a necessary work force to the rest of the galaxy. We’ve also gained yet another delegate, and by now over half the galaxy has sent representation.”

He waited while the council murmured between themselves, obviously pleased by the quick progress.

“Once we are a bit more certain how the new government will function, each of you will be rewarded for your loyalty. Your positions on the High Council will come with permanent lodgings on Coruscant, as it will be the base for our military operations. You will be working closely with the government officials and will be treated as such.”

“And our families?” asked a female officer at the opposite end of the table.

“They will live with you if that is your wish. The upper levels are safe, and hopefully soon our work will mean that there will be little danger anywhere on the planet.”

Rey noticed the pleased look on Hux’s face and wasn’t entirely sure if his sudden good mood was entirely due to the permanent home for his contraband cat, or if it might have something to do with a certain young woman.

‘Your lodgings will be ready when we arrive. It’s time that we start to get everything settled and our new capital in smooth running order.”

The meeting was over within the hour and Rey sighed as everyone else left the room and Hux’s hologram disappeared.

”You need to get yourself in good running order,” she chastised softly, leaning down to kiss his cheek fondly. “Look at you. Whoever heard of an emperor with dark circles under his eyes? You need to sleep, and you need to delegate some more of those worries.”

“I created the Council,” he muttered.

“Yes, but…”

“I have given much of the job of charm and negotiation to you.”

“Yes, but…”

“I have given the Knights of Ren the job of tearing apart the underpinnings of the crime syndicates on Coruscant.”

She grabbed his chin in her hand, and he met her eyes with calm amusement. “Yes, but…you also are not sleeping or eating properly. You are worrying too much about the little details and who to contact and what is next on your schedule.”

“You don’t worry about those things?”

“No, I do not…Maybe I should let you borrow Edelphi. She helps so much keeping track of all that and making sure that I don’t miss anything throughout the day. If I need something or to find someone she takes care of it.”

“I don’t think I can borrow your handmaiden, sweetheart.”

She screwed up her face in concentration. “We need to get you an assistant.”

He chuckled softly. “Do we?”

“Yes, emperors need assistants. Your knights…”

“ _ Our _ knights,” he interjected.

“Yes, they are wonderful for certain things but that’s not the kind of assistance that I’m talking about. Oh, what’s that officer’s name? The little one? He’s always so nice?”

“Uh?”

She hopped off his lap and ran to open the door, leaning out into the hallway and beckoning to the Knight of Ren standing guard in the hallway.

Ap’lek stepped into the room and stared at her curiously his helmeted head tipped to the side.

“What’s that officer’s name?” she repeated. “The short one? He’s really nice to me, but kind of always looks terrified of you? I mean, more so than normal?”

“Mitaka?”

“Yes! That’s the one! Can you find him for me? I have a job for him! He’s going to be so pleased.”

***

Mitaka was, in fact, not pleased. At least not at first.

It took her several days to puzzle out how he had come to be so terrified of Ben, but once she had discovered the story- and made Ben officially apologize for using the Force to drag the man across the room to what he thought would be his certain death- Mitaka began to relax and was soon even enjoying his job.

He was remarkably well organized and got along so well with Edelphi that between the two of them they kept everything on schedule and arranged for whatever Ben and Rey thought needed to be done around the palace.

Coruscant itself settled into a predictable rhythm nearly as easily, hunger seeming to be the root of most of its problems.

The first shipment of food had arrived and been distributed with nearly frightening efficiency, thanks to Hux and his ruthless planning. There were innumerable distribution points throughout the city, at all levels, and he had made several announcements that new shipments would be arriving weekly, which had helped to prevent the citizens from fighting over or hoarding the food supplies.

The planet seemed to exist for an entire week with its breath held in uncertain anticipation. The streets were quiet and subdued as everyone waited with full stomachs for the first time in years to see if their new leadership would keep its word.

When the second shipment arrived, there was chaos.

People spilled into the public spaces outside the palace, screaming the name of their new Supreme Leader and the woman they thought would be his bride. Rey watched from the balcony of their bedchamber, now redecorated in their signature shades of blues and reds. She stood just out of sight, smiling as the people below chanted and sang and danced their joy.

“It took so little,” Ben grumbled behind her.

“It did,” she agreed. “They were hungry and tired of watching their children starve.”

“Has Hux had any luck on finding volunteers that want to move into a new career as farmers?” He said it with a bit of humor, but Rey nodded passionately.

“He’s had so many that they’ve been able to screen for the best fit. They’re taking only the residents that are identified as the most likely to succeed under such difficult working conditions and that they believe will have the easiest time adjusting and assimilating into the existing culture.”

“That’s good. I wouldn’t have thought of that, but it would be best if anyone who goes is prepared to live peacefully in the already existing society instead of creating separate factions in the planet.”

“It was Hux’s idea,” she told him.

“Was it?”

“If the current chancellor is as corrupt as we suspect…”

“He is, and the knights have already picked up on rumors in the streets that he is furious about what we’ve done here.”

“Then he will need to be removed from his position as soon as we can arrange it,” she waited for his nod, “and he will need to be replaced. We cannot spend all of our energy focused on Coruscant forever. We will need to turn our attention to the wider galaxy and allow the daily running of the capital to fall to someone else.”

“It’s Hux isn’t it?” he asked grumpily.

“It should be,” she answered. “He’s done well here, and I think he wants to stay. He’ll have the power he wanted and maybe some other things that he didn’t know he needed.”

“We can’t afford a direct confrontation with the current chancellor yet, but once we are capable, the job can go to Hux if you still think he is the best person for the job.”

***

The next morning, he showed her the beginning of her garden.

“I promised I would plant you an ocean of green, remember?”

She smiled at him, because she hadn’t believed him at the time, but he had apparently taken his promise very seriously.

There wasn’t much yet to show, the little that remained of the palace gardens was woefully neglected and brown. It had been attended by a handful of older gardeners that lamented the lack of funds from the chancellor to keep it in decent shape.

Ben had already fixed that, and he walked her through the area, discussing the plans he had worked out with the gardeners. He showed her where the paths would be, and the pond, and several private seating areas.

It was not much more than dirt now, but she understood how precious that was on a planet like this, where every inch of ground was used for the survival of its far too numerous inhabitants.

He saved the best part for last- a small corner near the back where the new planting had begun. Here they had already dug the flower beds and laid the stones between them. There was a small bench, tucked under the shade of young trees that grew fragrant fruits in yellows and oranges. A fountain bubbled prettily to keep her company even if she wanted to wander out alone. 

At the base were several plants with red flowers that she recognized immediately, their petals crimson and beautiful in the breeze.

“I know these,” she said fondly.

“I knew on Naboo that those would be the first plants I gave you in your garden. It suits you,” he said with a smile, pulling her jeweled headpiece from his pocket and holding it up in the light. “This is yours, and I would like to return it…with a few small adjustments.”

“Oh?” She glanced at him curiously, unable to see any difference.

He tugged on the petal at the farthest end and a slender blade slid out of a newly created and well-hidden sheath.

“It’s not as useful as a lightsaber, but it is good for those days where you may choose not to wear the saber and still want something easily accessible to defend yourself. This is the first, but I had several similar pieces commissioned. A necklace, a bracelet, an arm cuff. It lets you choose whatever piece you think works best with your gown…or for when you wear your crown, after the coronation.”

“Oh,” she said in surprise. “Will I have to wear a crown?”

“You will have one, but only for formal occasions.”

She took the weapon, surprised at the deadly edge and how well it had been designed to hide from the eyes while being so easily accessed- she wouldn’t even need to remove it from her hair.

“This is a very nice gift,” she said. “I should have gotten you something.”

“You’ve already given me yourself- your love and your trust. I want nothing else.”

“A kiss?” she teased, leaning up on her toes and waiting expectantly.

“Are you giving kisses of gratitude these days?” he asked, widening his eyes at her in a poor imitation of surprise.

“Only to those I love more than my own life.”

She smiled when he pressed his lips to hers, pushing the truth of her love to him through the bond that she hardly noticed anymore. It had become so familiar to her that his thoughts and feelings were simply the background noise of her existence. Like her heartbeat, or the steady sound of breath in her lungs, it would be noticeable now only by its absence.


	19. Deadly Intentions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She was poison in a pretty bottle- Rachel Cain

The Jedi temple was larger than Ben thought it would be.

His family hadn’t come here when he had visited Coruscant years ago with his mother, and he had expected something similar to Luke’s temple, the one where he had done his own Jedi training. He had been wrong, very wrong.

The Jedi temple on Coruscant was an imposing, ancient structure, long abandoned but still elegant and ripe with rippling energy in the Force. There was much light here, as he had known there would be, but there was a thin layer of sucking black darkness that lay over it. Echoes of dark deeds and unspeakable betrayal.

He looked down to find Rey standing quietly, her lip trembling with unshed emotion. They had shared visions of this place, and both of them knew only too well the lives that had been lost here. It was not a surprise that the dying screams of younglings would have left a deep scar in the Force, but to feel it personally was a different matter.

“Are you sure you want to come inside with me?”

He wanted to shield her from any unpleasantness, but he knew that she would never allow it, and she was right- they had a duty and it would require her to take on the weight of many unpleasant things. He had wanted to lay the galaxy at her feet, but he hadn’t realized at the time that it would be as much of a burden as blessing.

As though to confirm his thoughts, she nodded firmly. “I have to. We can’t put off this part of our duty forever. Dealing with the politicians and the military are important, but it was imbalance and manipulations here that brought down the Old Republic. We have to deal with the Force, or the other work we are doing might be for nothing.”

She took his hand and they walked together through the temple doors, two Knights of Ren and several dozen stormtroopers close behind them. The Force rippled in welcome and the ghosts of the past all seemed to sigh in happy unison.

Anakin Skywalker had brought death to this place, and now Ben and Rey Solo would bring life.

They walked through the rooms in somber silence, and Ben was glad that the bodies of the fallen at least seemed to have been tended to. There were no corpses lining the walls to announce the depth of the tragedy that had befallen those within, just an endless unnatural stillness.

Walking the halls felt like stepping back into his grandfather's memories, and Ben recognized many places that he had seen in their visions of Anakin's life. There were places for eating, for sleeping, for training...and one large room with walls of transperisteel that they were fairly certain had been the meeting room for the Jedi's High Council.

Rey asked them to stop so she could look around more thoroughly in what Ben thought had been a library of some kind, and their guard stayed back a respectful distance to give her privacy as she wandered.

Ben watched her with a small smile. She was not dressed for meetings today and had a on black belted tunic with a hood and gray arm wraps. He supposed that in these surroundings that she looked almost like the Jedi she had almost become, but to his eyes she looked more like his scavenger today than she had since they returned from securing food for Coruscant, and it always reminded him of the first time he had seen her and how far they had come since that fateful moment.

They had both changed almost beyond recognition in the months since, and he had begun to fear that she was losing herself in the process of becoming what the galaxy needed her to be, but she looked nearly as happy here as she did in her garden and it pleased him to see that there were things in this new life that she could find joy in.

She poked around the large room for quite some time, a look of deep concentration on her face as she did so. Though she had given up aspirations of being a Jedi herself, she was still eager to learn as much about them as she could, and he did not begrudge her that search for knowledge. The memory of the Jedi meant something different to him than it did to her, but he knew that they could both agree that a future of balance with whole, healthy families was important to both of them.

“We should open it to the galaxy,” he said when she was done with her explorations at last, speaking into existence the plan that had been forming in the back of his mind for some time. “All Force users could be welcome to come here, to learn and to train. None would be required to remain here, or to give up contact with their families if they choose to stay. There would be no one taking children away from their mothers.”

She squeezed his hand, and he knew that she understood what he did not say. They were closer each day to having to face his contentious relationship with his own mother, but it was not time for that conversation yet. 

“We can collect knowledge here that will be available to all and will no longer belong to the Sith or the Jedi,” Rey agreed, turning to look around the room as though trying to picture the future in her mind. “I can imagine what it will be like when it is full of students and passing travelers- there will be life and love and hope. We can keep the Jedi texts and Luke’s saber here, and any other artifacts that we find.”

“It's a good resting place for my grandfather’s saber," Ben said, rubbing a hand over his face as he weighed the implications of that in his mind. "He used it to begin the fall of the Jedi, and it will be here to witness the healing in the Force that will ultimately come from as a result of those actions, after so many years of suffering and pain. I think Anakin would be pleased with that.”

“And Luke? The saber was his, too.”

Ben frowned. “I never saw Luke use that saber. I know he did, when he was very young, but I only ever saw him with the green one that he made himself. But, yes, I think he would agree to having it here…and the Jedi texts,” he said, anticipating her next question before she could ask.

Her hand on his arm was gentle, and her voice was understanding. “I’m sorry, I know you don’t like to talk about Luke. I just…I just want to make sure that we do this right. So much damage has been done in the name of the Sith and the Jedi. I don't want to mess up our chance for a fresh start.”

“As long as you don’t try to murder any of the students who come here to study, we will be doing a better job than Luke or Anakin ever did," he said dryly. "The bar of success is not that high.”

She blinked at him, and then erupted into a fit of laughter that she tried unsuccessfully to stifle behind her hand. “Oh no,” she gasped. “You’re right. How awful.”

“It is,” he agreed with a chuckle. “But don’t worry so much about what the Jedi or my family would think. They all made their own mistakes, or we wouldn’t be here now.”

“I know, but it’s still hard not to think of the Jedi as some kind of mythical heroes, even though I know better now.”

“It will get easier,” he assured her. “If we open the building for use, we will get more familiar with this place and that will help us remember that they were just people who lived here, regular people like us. Once we get everything handled with the chancellor and Hux is settled into his new duties, we could even come here ourselves to practice and train."

"It would be nice to spend more time on meditation and combat training. I know what we're doing is important, but sometimes...sometimes I miss being able to come and go as I pleased," she glanced meaningfully at the stormtroopers standing attentively not far away, "and not having a full accompaniment of guards everywhere I go. I was always busy before, scrambling for survival. Now, I'm not even sure what I'm doing most days." She chewed lightly on her bottom lip, a habit that he knew meant she was feeling unsettled.

"You have always been a survivor, and now you are a pretty bird stuck in a gilded cage. It is necessary, for now, but I regret that it is. I will arrange for as many sparring opponents as possible, if you think it would help. I've been feeling restless myself- we can fight the guards and the knights and each other. You can even start working on building your own saber, finally.”

“I do love that purple crystal, and this one is functional but it doesn't feel right in my hand,” she said and tapped the red one that was fastened securely at her hip with a rueful smile. 

"I can help you start as soon as you're ready..."he began, but a flurry of motion interrupted their planning as the other four members of the Knights of Ren strode quickly into the room.

“Get these stormtroopers spread out,” Ushar snapped, waving a hand at the Vicrul and Cardo, the two that had accompanied them to the temple. “We need men at every entrance.”

No questions were asked, the urgency in Ushar’s tone was enough to convey that explanations could wait, and the stormtroopers were soon sealing the temple against entry from anyone else.

“What’s happening?” Rey asked. “What’s wrong?”

“We are getting the same news from our spies in every crime syndicate this morning,” Kuruk answered. “The chancellor is looking for an assassin.”

“An assassin? For what?” Ben was afraid he already knew the answer, and he drew Rey in close to his side.

“For you,” Kurduk confirmed. “For the murders of Supreme Leader Kylo Ren and Rey, his scavenger bride from Jakku.”

“He is bolder than I expected,” Ben admitted, cold rage spreading through him at the idea that anyone would dare to attempt violence on his wife.

“And far less intelligent,” Rey snapped, and he could feel the same simmering anger humming beneath the surface of her skin. “Did he think we would simply stand here and let him kill us?”

“No, but he knows there is actually little that we can do to stop him," Ben told her, his teeth clenched as he repressed the urge to rush from the temple and cut the man down himself in full view of whatever witnesses happened to be on hand for the event. "To address his crime openly means admitting to our vulnerability and that Coruscant did not welcome the First Order, after all. It damages our position with the delegates if we have him arrested.”

“Then what can we do?” The fear that replaced the anger in her eyes made illness swim in his stomach. “Ben, I will not lose you to some scheming politician and his hired mercenaries.”

***

He refused to let her out of his sight for the next three days.

She accompanied him to every meeting that could not be postponed, and he went with her if she wanted a walk in the gardens or a sip of juice from the kitchens. The only place he didn’t follow her was to the fresher, but only because she closed the door in his face after allowing him to check the entire room for potential assassins and well laid traps. She was irritated at first by his constant vigilance, but she could feel his fear and she soon relaxed- realizing that it was more for his own peace of mind than because he lacked faith in her ability to defend herself.

He touched her a thousand times throughout the day, a subtle brush of his hand against hers or the press of his leg against her knee beneath the table, just to make sure that she was there and still safe. He knew he was being unreasonable, but the potential threat against her life had rekindled his fear losing her. It was far worse than it had been when she was with the Resistance, because he knew now what his life was like with her in it...and because he was the one that had brought her here and so he would be ultimately to blame if anything happened to her.

If he failed to keep her safe...

He feared would never be able to live without her, and he whispered it into her skin every night as he held her, as he tried to will the Force to protect her. His lovemaking was more passionate, his kisses longer and more desperate. She held him tightly and promised not to die, but fleeting images of Padme making the same promise to his grandfather chased themselves across his nightmares.

On the fourth day, they hosted a dinner at the palace.

Mitaka quite outdid himself, securing Ben a form fitting black and red tunic and cape that matched Rey’s red silk dress to perfection.

The gown she wore had a full skirt, a tight fit in the bodice and the long sleeves, and was without embellishment- the bold color and simple lines highlighted the fierce beauty of her face, the slender curves of her body, and the glimmering red jewels that winked in the light from their places in her hair, on her arms, her wrists, her throat.

She was more heavily armed than any of his guards, though no one would know it to look at her.

That did nothing to set his mind at ease as they entered the formal dining room with her on his arm. A hush fell over the diners, all of whom were already seated and waiting for their arrival, and every head turned to watch with interest as they passed. Many of the earliest arriving delegates were in attendance, and they both smiled warmly at the delegate from Naboo.

“Which one is he?” Rey asked quietly when they were seated beside each other at the head of the long table. She waited for an answer as he scanned the room for the face he had seen only in holograms, and continued to smile at him as though they were discussing nothing more important than the pleasantness of the weather. It twisted his heart inside his chest to see her handle such deception with ease, but he knew they had little choice. Everyone in the room was watching, and he would rather this, than to lose her entirely.

If he had known this was the price of leadership, perhaps he would have asked her to run away with him to some quiet planet in the Outer Rim and left the galaxy and the Force to sort out their issues alone.

“The far end, on your left,” he said when he finally spotted the chancellor among the other guests, careful not to look again in that direction as he directed her gaze. “The tallest of the men at the end of the table, dressed in a green.”

“He’s younger than I expected,” she said with a sigh, and Ben glanced at him again. It was odd, after everything he had done, to feel a flash of regret for what he knew must be done now. Others much more deserving had received far less of his sympathy.

“He was the youngest chancellor in Coruscant’s history,” Ben confirmed. He could feel the sudden spike in her anxiety and he placed a hand on hers to still her restlessly drumming fingers. Ben had known it would be different when there was a face, a real person, to put with the name. The chancellor was no longer a shadowy threat, but a living being with his own hopes and aspirations, however twisted. If they tried, they would be able to identify his unique signature in the Force, his own particular life energy.

“How have your etiquette lessons gone?” he asked, trying to distract her as the servers brought in the first course.

“What? Oh, not bad, I suppose. My plan was to just do whatever it is that you do, actually,” she admitted with a giggle. “I can tolerate the gowns far better than trying to use all these forks.” She picked one up and gave it a little wave, eyeing it suspiciously as she did so.

He laughed, a deep rumble that turned heads all along the table. “It's good that we were honest about your childhood, if you make any mistakes in etiquette no one will comment on it. To do so would only bring condemnation upon them and have others regard them as extremely rude. It’s considered impolite to judge the manners of someone whose upbringing did not expose them to the rigid customs of the bureaucracy.”

“Good, because I grew up eating entirely with my fingers,” she said with a laugh.

“You are wonderfully feral beneath that fancy gown and those sparkling jewels, and I love you for it,” he said, kissing her cheek and watching the blush creep across her skin at such blatant affection in front of everyone. “They are all going to know how much you are loved before this dinner is over,” he reminded her, and chuckled again at her exaggerated wince.

It was the one part of their plans for this dinner that he did not mind in the slightest and he spent most of the dinner kissing her lips, and her forehead, and her nose and feeding her bits of his own food from his fingers.

The delegates that had arrived stiff with fear of Kylo Ren’s notorious temper were soon smiling at them fondly and making quiet jokes about the mellowing effects of love on even the most frightening of men. The rumors of his terrible nature must have been greatly exaggerated, they agreed, otherwise such a gentle and kind young woman would not be looking at him with such open and undisguised devotion.

They smiled even more when the object of his affection stood at the end of the meal and began to move about the table, charming everyone effortlessly and discussing the food and the first official meeting to discuss the possible establishment of a senate that was set to take place the following week.

Ben watched her go with hooded eyes, his knuckles white on his cup. She smiled easily and often, her hand resting reassuringly on someone’s shoulder, her cheek pressed against someone else’s in greeting. Any one of them could be a danger to her, and he hated having her so close to people that he didn’t trust.

He drained the wine in his cup and waved a server over for more as she worked her way down the left side of the table. It arrived moments before the chancellor himself turned to face her.

She never faltered. Her smile never wobbled, and her body never stiffened as she greeted him. She stayed several minutes, and he watched anxiously as several people around them listened closely to the conversation that was taking place. He knew that they now had many well-respected witnesses that could attest to the future empress asking the chancellor to join her for lunch the following day. They had plans, as though they expected for the man to have a future.

None of those noticed the hand that lingered for a moment over his cup as she leaned down to press her cheek against his before moving on.

But Ben noticed, as he noticed the gleam of hatred in the man’s eyes as she walked away.

By the time they retired to their chambers Rey looked exhausted, and he cupped her face in his hand and studied the circles beneath her eyes with concern.

“Are you okay?” he asked gently. Her face remained impassive, but she leaned her cheek further into his hand, as though seeking his warmth and his support. She must be upset about what they-what  _ she _ -had been forced to do. “I’m sorry that it came to this, that the burden of it fell to you.”

She didn’t have to ask what he meant and shook her head. “Don’t be sorry. I’m not.”

“You’re not?” He was surprised, but there was no hint of deception toward him or herself in her tone or in their connection through the Force. She was resolute, and he knew that she would sleep with a conscience that was clear from doubt or regret.

“No,” she said, and her voice did not waiver. “I have killed before…killed for only my own survival. It was instinctual on Jakku or in battle, there wasn't time to think about it each death before it happened, but the result was the same. It was...unfortunate, that he didn't get to face his fate directly but far more than my own life rests on a smooth transition to our control of the galaxy. All of the lives on Coruscant, in all of the other systems…we need this process to be flawless if they are to survive.”

He knew that she had agreed to the plan, had harvested the necessary bits of her flowers from the garden herself, and they had gone over all of this before, but he knew they both needed to hear it again, to reassure themselves that they had done what was best from their limited options.

She shrugged, dismissing the weight of everything else that rested on their shoulders. “Besides, even if all that were not true…he intended to harm you, and I would not risk your life for anything, especially not the life of a man who promotes slavery and starvation among his own people. The chancellor decided his own fate when he became a threat to your life.”

He dropped a kiss to her forehead, shaken to the core by the ferocity of her love for him, the faith that she had put in his ability to be a good enough person to help save all of those lives. She had killed for him, and he knew that if necessary, she would do so again.

Fear that he might fail her snaked itself around his heart. He had failed so many times in his life and, so far, it had been her skills and unshakable devotion to their cause that had carried them forward to their success. He felt a bit useless in the face of the strength of her convictions. He would do anything he could to prove himself worthy of her and the galaxy, but it seemed that the galaxy needed her far more than it needed him. What did he have to offer besides anger and destruction?

Only his love for her, and it paled beside all that she had done. Maybe the Force had made a mistake, and it really needed only Rey to bring balance and prosperity. The thought troubled him, sinking immediately to the deep places inside him where he had always felt useless and unwanted. He sighed, burying the familiar pain and doubt. If caring for her was all that he could do, then he would do it to the best of his ability and never make her disappointed in him.

“Still, you don’t look well,” he pressed. “I’ve rarely seen you look so tired.”

“Even after all of this, there is still so much to be done, it is sometimes overwhelming. To begin, we will need a new chancellor now,” she reminded him.

“Do you still think Hux is the best choice?” It remained unfathomable to him that she had such faith in the general, but he couldn’t deny that the man had proven himself invaluable since she had taken a liking to him.

“I do,” she confirmed. “His experience has been put to good use here, even the time spent designing that dreadful stormtrooper program has given him excellent insight into psychological profiles. That has incredible advantages when implementing relocation programs across the galaxy, helps to keep things peaceful. It’s almost like…”

“Like?”

“Like it was meant to be,” she finished. “Like the Force designed all of this to fall into place at just the right time.”

“It would make sense, after what Anakin told us. Some things are destiny.”

She laughed at the look on his face. “Does that upset you?”

“I don’t mind at all having you as my destiny, or the burden of balancing the Force and uniting the galaxy beside you…but did Hux really have to be a part of it? It seems like an unnecessary hardship. ”

She giggled, clearly aware that he was only half joking. “You will have to learn to love him, too. He is one of our people.”

He flopped back onto the bed dramatically, groaning and making her laugh until tears sparkled on her lashes. 

Her worries were apparently forgotten and the bed dipped as she clambered over the side. He opened his eyes when she settled herself on top of him, one leg resting beside each of his hips. Her hair was down now, loose and flowing about her face as she stared down at him with mirth still trembling on her lips. The red silk of her gown was bunched in her hands, tugged up on her thighs to make room for him between them, and his gaze dipped to the matching stain on her lips, seized by a sudden desire to kiss it away until her mouth was its usual familiar shade of pink.

She read the swift change in his mood, and her eyes widened in surprise as he leaned up to catch the plush swell of her bottom lip between his teeth. She shuddered on a moan that might have been his name, and he was lost in her sweetness, in the need to take and plunder and mark her as his own. He plunged his fingers into her hair, dipped his tongue into her mouth to taste the honey sweetness of its depths.

Stitches ripped loudly in the silence when he tugged the deeply cut bodice of her dress down to reveal the gentle curve of her breasts, and she gasped. “Ben,” she admonished, “my dress.”

“Someone will fix it,” he muttered, rubbing a thumb across the stiffening peak of one perfect pink nipple. “Or I’ll buy you a new one. A hundred new ones.”

“Hmm,” she hummed, arching into his touch. “Was it worth all that to avoid having to unbutton it?”

He didn’t answer her, just ran a hand down the row of buttons that stretched from the nape of her neck to the small of her back and smiled at her wolfishly before tugging her nipple into his mouth and lavishing it with attention until she was panting and squirming above him. “Ben, please…” Her voice broke on a whine, but after everything that had happened, after realizing how close he had once again come to losing her, he was not ready to move to end this so soon, despite her easy willingness.

She would be wet and ready for him now, eager and demanding as she always was, but he wanted to linger over her, to taste her, to feel her come undone again and again until pleasure pushed every other thought and doubt from her mind.

“Move up,” he instructed, tugging on her hips as he attempted to guide her into the position he wanted.

“What?” Her eyes were blurry with want, and she blinked at him in confusion.

“Like this, sweetheart,” he murmured, pressing the image into her mind, and smiling at her shocked little gasp. She hesitated, but he knew she could feel the truth of his desire through the bond, and she knew how much he wanted it.

He sighed contentedly as she climbed higher up his body, coming to rest with one slender leg on either side of his head, her dress pulled up and pressed against the taunt plane of her stomach. She stared down at him in concern, the curious but intrigued expression on her face was endearingly familiar.

Her thighs jumped beneath his fingers when he flicked his tongue against her for the first time and her mouth opened in wordless surprise.

_ Don’t think, just take _

The words began in his mind and echoed in hers as she gasped and shook through the onslaught of his lips and tongue against her. Victory coursed through him when she relaxed her clenched muscles and let her legs drift apart, her body flexing against him eagerly when he pressed his tongue inside her.

She was already wet and dripping with desire, and he drove her further, nipping and sucking and licking up into her folds as she cried out above him. She tangled her fingers into his hair and begged him not to stop, and he was once again thankful that the Jedi had such limited impact on her. She had no shyness, no inhibitions that would keep her from giving him everything.

She cried out, her legs trembling as her first peak crashed through her.

“Again,” he demanded, rolling her until her back was pressed against their sheets and splaying a hand across her abdomen to hold her hips still.

“Ben,” she whined, bucking against his hand as he slid two fingers into her. “More,” she pleaded, and he added a third with a smile. She was always greedy, but now she was so relaxed so  _ ready _ that her body gave easily to the stretch.

He worked his fingers inside her, hooking them to rub the spot inside her that he knew always drove her over the edge, he rubbed his thumb over the small bud hidden in her folds and she flew apart again beneath his hands.

“Again,” he told her as he tugged open his own clothing and drove his full length into her in one smooth thrust. “You can, sweetheart, I know you can,” he said when she shook her head tiredly. “Give me one more.”

She moaned at his first steady movements inside her and he could feel her arousal flutter to life again 

He moved more insistently, each thrust a perfect glide against the wet welcoming heat of her body, and whispered his love in her ear until the rhythm of her breathing became strained with effort and he knew she was close to the edge again. He gripped her hip, shifting her until she opened more and took more of him in and she began to sob breathlessly with each wet slap of his body into hers.

“Please,” he begged her, teeth clenched against his own precipice, trying to keep it at bay just long enough for her to find her own release again. “One more,” he asked, reaching between their bodies to find the small hard center of her pleasure and caress it with his fingers. She clenched around him, her pleasure cutting into him through their bond and sending him hurtling into his own oblivion with such ferocity that it took his breath away and turned his whole world white.

***

The chancellor was dead by the next morning, rumors swirling at that he had passed away quite suddenly in his sleep.

Several delegates had been invited to have breakfast with them in a smaller, less formal dining room, and Rey frowned, pressing a shocked hand to her chest when they mentioned the news.

“My apologies, I thought that the Supreme Leader would have told you by now.” The delegate rushed to explain himself, looking between the two of them as though expecting to suffer a monstrous consequence for upsetting Kylo Ren’s young fiancé.

“No,” Ben said, his words short but not unkind. “I did not wish to risk upsetting her this early in the morning. I should have known that word would have spread, however, so the fault is my own.”

“Did the medical droids find any sign of foul play?” she asked, grabbing Ben's arm in apparent distress.

“They did not,” said a young, female delegate from an outer rim planet that Rey had never heard of before this morning. She leaned toward her to whisper, “which would have been considered very strange indeed, had he not claimed ill health for such a long time. Apparently, that is why he was not often seen outside the palace while he was chancellor.”

Ben thought it more likely that he sought to avoid being torn apart by a starving mob of his own creation, but he said nothing, and Rey only smiled sympathetically.

“Very unfortunate,” she remarked to the others seated at the small table. “I was looking forward to finally getting to know him. We had not yet spoken, it was the Supreme Leader’s desire to give him time to get settled properly in his new quarters first, but we were to have lunch together today.”

“Such a pity,” Ben agreed stiffly.

Everyone murmured their agreement before the topic turned to the upcoming first meeting of the delegates and what Rey’s expected role would be both before and after the wedding. Ben knew that word of Rey’s apparent sadness over the chancellor’s death would spread through the delegates’ living quarters within hours, and his untimely demise would soon be an unremarkable event attributed entirely to natural causes.

They trusted her, believed her to be innocent and naïve. She played their games so well that not a single one of them realized that she was even a player.

She turned and smiled at him, relief plain on her face and he knew she had reached the same conclusion. They were safe again, at least for now, and the crisis had been averted. He was coming to understand that this was simply what it felt like to rule, overcoming one obstacle after another in an endless series of near disasters with consequences that would be felt across the galaxy if they failed.

First he had needed to manage Hux, and then find Rey, and then marry Rey, and then gain her acceptance into the First Order, and then move the First Order to Coruscant, and entice the delegates, and feed the populace, and kill the chancellor, and…

It would never end.

He squeezed her hand. He knew he could not have managed all of this alone, and there was no one better suited to these challenges than his wife. She carried the conversation all through breakfast and kissed him sweetly when it was done.


	20. The Phantom Menace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Never was anything great achieved without danger- Niccolo Machiavelli

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We only have a few more chapters to go until we see much more of the Resistance! There is lots of good stuff coming in the next few chapters and I am thrilled that we have made it this far!
> 
> *I apologize for the slight delay on this, it's time for school start again and since my own kids are homeschooled and I have returned to college myself, its a busy season here. I hope that I can manage that and still keep a mostly consistent update schedule! To make up for the delay on this chapter, I included a bit of unplanned smuttiness. Thank you so much for putting up with me!

It took weeks to prepare Coruscant for the establishment of a new chancellor. Tradition insisted that they hold a funeral for the grieving public, and everyone pretended not to notice the decidedly celebratory atmosphere when the official day of mourning finally arrived.

Rey stood immobile beside Ben, dressed in a gown of relentless black that covered her from neck to ankle. The only glimpse of skin that was to be seen was the flesh of her arms through the long sheer sleeves, as Edelphi had carefully pinned a black veil into her hair that covered her face.

They could have promoted Hux the following day, but Ben had suggested that they give it a bit and let everyone assume that they were taking time to consider who would be best for the position. It was a reasonable move, considering the supposed suddenness of the chancellor’s death.

At the end of the third week, they had made the announcement that a new candidate had been chosen and that his ascension to the position would take place one week from that day in a public ceremony on the palace steps. All were invited, but for those who could not attend or chose not to try to view the event in a crowded throng of pressing bodies, there would be a public broadcast.

The evening of the announcement, they had held a meeting of the high council in the palace throne room, which had been equipped with a long table similar to the one on the  _ Finalizer _ . Ben had held many meetings here with the delegates, hearing their various concerns and suggestions, but this was the first meeting of the First Order’s high council since they had last met aboard the ship. All of them looked around nervously, taking in the high cavernous ceilings and the large black throne where Palpatine had once sat.

The New Supreme Leader did not look ill at ease, and it helped to soothe their ragged nerves, but they did not know how lucky he felt that Palpatine had rarely sat this throne and had left little of his Force energy behind. What little remained contained the echo of such rot and filth that it had made him nauseous, and Rey had actually vomited into a potted plant the first time they had entered the room.

It had become more tolerable as they had used the room, their own energies overpowering the old, but it was still an unpleasant memory.

The room itself was a manifestation of the same- the new overlaying the old in ways that still felt and tentative. Large and cavernous with dark walls and high ceilings, it still needed to be updated. The old Empire insignia, engraved into the walls themselves, had merely been hastily covered with the red and black First Order banners. It was a thin sheen of change over old wounds, but they had both agreed that it would be wise not to do any more permanent changes until after their coronations.

They had made several decisions about the government going forward, and they were trying to avoid the necessity of redoing the decorating twice.

Rey sat quietly on the arm of the throne as the council members filed in, her foot tapping a restless beat against the dais as she shifted her weight uncomfortably. This throne had narrow arms, curved and unforgiving under her thighs. It did not accommodate her preferred spot as well as the throne on the _ Finalizer _ had done.

She was glad that she wouldn’t be forced to occupy this particularly comfortable seat for long.

Her days of sitting on the arm of someone else’s throne were rapidly coming to an end. There would be two thrones here as soon as she was officially wed and crowned in the eyes of the galaxy, and she knew that her own was currently under construction. It would be a perfect match the one that her husband now occupied. He had insisted on that, refusing the suggestion that perhaps her seat should be smaller, lower than his own.

The poor fool that had suggested it had been quickly disabused of the notion that her position would wield any less power than her husband’s. Kylo Ren’s outraged stare had been enough to send the worker scampering from the room, his pace only increasing when he realized how the Knights of Ren had closed ranks around him to hasten his departure. 

The throne was due to be ready in two months, just in time for her to use it for the coronation. The wedding would take place in the morning and the coronation in the evening of the same day.

Rey had tried to have the ceremonies sooner but had been thwarted at every turn by the difficulty of arranging such a large event for so many guests, the process of which had bloomed into a nightmare that was out of control.

It hadn’t taken her long to figure out that the time Ben had spent with his mother on Hosnian Prime had prepared him for how ridiculous it all would be, and that was why he had gifted her with the smaller and more intimate wedding on Naboo.

As he had told her then- that ceremony had been for them and the upcoming spectacle was for the galaxy.

Ben shifted beside her, drawing her attention to him as he lounged on the throne, fingers wrapped around her hip and a frown on his face. He had been troubled lately, some nameless worry lingering in his eyes, but he hadn’t been able to explain exactly what troubled him. The bond between them did not allow for secrets, and she could feel his helpless frustration when he tried to put his dissatisfaction into words.

She did what she could to help him, pressing her love into his mind until his lips twitched in the beginnings of a smile. He had smiled at her every day since their wedding months ago, but it still sent a flame of lust licking through her whenever it happened.

She tried to shield him from it, conscious of the others that were rapidly filling the chairs in front of them, but she knew she had failed when his eyebrows shot up in surprise.

_ Hush _

He didn’t look at her, or acknowledge her silent admonishment, but a vision of his invention crowded into her consciousness- one that put their shared throne to a very inappropriate use. She squeaked, and hastily covered it with a dainty cough as Ben chuckled quietly beside her. His voice in her mind was silky with mischief.

_ You started, it sweetheart _

Heat curled through her as his hand rubbed a small circle into her hip. She bit her lip- hesitating, contemplating the image in her mind.

_ Can we? _

He froze, glancing at her silently, curiosity and amazement on his face. He apparently hadn’t thought that she would actually be willing to go along with that image. He’d meant only to shock her, to watch her cheeks and pinken in embarrassment and anticipation. Her willingness was unexpected, and it seemed that a new world of possibilities had just opened in his mind.

His answering smile was wickedly seductive.

It was hard for either of them to focus for the rest of the meeting, little frissons of heat and moments of visions slipping quietly back and forth along their bond kept threatening to distract them both, but the task at hand was too important to let themselves get too carried away.

This time Hux was the general that made a physical appearance, and Pryde attended on hologram from a First Order ship. Ben had sent him with a small group of dreadnoughts to provide support to systems in the Outer Rim. Several of them had complained of shipping lanes that had been overrun by criminal organizations that were demanding exorbitant fees for passage through their territories.

Rey was pleased to learn that those organizations had recently learned that all territories now belonged to the First Order, and food supply runs had returned to sustainable schedules. This willingness to enforce order even at the far edges of the galaxy, in areas usually overlooked by previous governments, had earned them delegates from several new systems in the Outer Rim.

“Very good work, General Pryde,” she admitted grudgingly.

His glance toward her was insultingly dismissive, his demeanor only appearing pleased when Ben spoke to echo her approval.

“Indeed, we’re grateful that you’ve handled the matter so swiftly.” Ben smiled at the flickering hologram before returning his attention to the rest of the council. “As I am sure you all know by now, we find ourselves in need of a new chancellor for Coruscant. The previous one has unfortunately died since our arrival…”

Rey watched curiously as Hux’s stoic face cracked for just a moment into a knowing smile. It was gone almost immediately, but it was enough to tell her that their plans had not fooled everyone. Once that might have concerned her, but she got the distinct impression that he approved of their underhanded disposal of that particular problem.

“…and will need to be replaced as soon as possible. We have chosen that replacement from among the members of the council.”

All eyes watched them- most were merely curious, though Pryde’s were expectant. He thought he would get the job, Rey realized. Well, she would be happy to let him know that his assumptions were incorrect.

“We trust this person to be able to handle the demands of the position and that he will act in the best interests of the people.” Rey took a deep breath. “Congratulations, Chancellor Hux.”

He turned them in stunned surprise, but Rey’s eyes were locked on General Pryde. He threw a murderous look at his rival before turning his infuriated gaze toward the throne. He met her stare for a moment, his face twisted with undisguised loathing before he was able to control himself and smooth his expression into a mask of indifference.

She tucked the memory away, something to share with Ben when they had a moment to discuss today’s events.

It occupied her thoughts as Ben set the date of the official public promotion. Hux was uncharacteristically clumsy in his manners as he accepted the job and agreed enthusiastically with the others as it was decided that his previous role on the council, the head of the stormtrooper program, would temporarily be occupied by Rey.

She had ideas on who the suitable permanent replacement would be, but it wasn’t quite time yet and there were a few small changes she needed to make before she handed it over, anyway.

Hux actually smiled at her when the meeting was adjourned, and everyone began to leave. He was good humored as the other council members clapped him on the back and congratulated him and Rey detected no malice from anyone at all about the transition taking place, except Pryde. The others had no jealousy because they simply didn’t want to be responsible for so many lives.

Ben waited until everyone had left before he turned to the Knights, still arranged protectively around the room.

“You all have the night off,” he announced, and they tipped their heads quizzically. “Everyone else has gone back to their own homes, we can see to our own safety just this once.”

“Should we escort you back to your chambers…” Cardo began but Ben shook his head.

“No, that’s alright. We’ll be fine on our own until morning.” She could feel the eagerness humming beneath his skin, and it warmed her, increasing the rate of her already pounding heartbeat.

She only waited long enough to hear the door close loudly behind them before she hopped off the arm of the throne, nerves giving her a sudden need for motion and urging her to flit just outside his reach, stepping away to flick the lock closed with her mind before she turned again to face him.

Her husband was sprawled on his throne, dark hair tousled and a wicked gleam in his eye. It sent a thrill through her, as it always did, to see him so sure of himself in his place of power. Whatever doubts she had felt simmering below the surface had been forgotten for now. Now he was an emperor, resplendent and glorious with love in every line of his handsome face.

She had always wanted him, but perhaps never more than she did now, and she pressed her desire to him through the bond and watched greedily as his eyes darkened and his lips parted on sharply indrawn breath.

“Come here,” he commanded softly, and fire curled through her, licking along her veins and pooling wetly between her thighs. She knew she would never get used to him looking at her like that- no matter she had him, she would always want more.

The sound her footsteps echoed loudly in the large room and made her wonder what other sounds would be like as they reverberated in the air, amplified by the walls and returned like a gift to their ears.

Ben’s eyes were dark and dangerous when she stopped to look at him, her thigh bumping against his knee. She followed the movement of his tongue, a quick pink flash, as it traced the fullness of his lower lip.

He reached for her, smooth motion of muscle beneath his tunic as he wrapped his arm around her waist and tugged, dragging her unto his lap until one of her legs was nestled on side of his thick thighs and she was peering down into his wonderfully familiar face.

“Hello,” she said, smiling as she rubbed her nose against his cheek.

“Hello,” he returned, and she could feel his fingers already working at the buttons that ran up her spine, working to free the fabric that blocked her breasts from his gaze. “I could barely keep my hands off you long enough to get them all out of here.”

“Hmm,” she hummed, nipping at the skin along the column of his throat and tracing her tongue over the point where she could feel his heart pounding just below the surface. “I think about doing this every time I see you sitting on a throne like this.”

“Really,” he paused in the act of tugging the soft fabric of her gown down to look at her in surprise.

“ _ Yes _ ,” she breathed, already working open the bindings on his tunic, seeking the pale skin and firm muscle that she knew she would find beneath it. “I would have let you know ages ago if I thought we could have done this.”

“Everything about you is a wonderful surprise. Force help me…I love you.”

“I think I love you more,” she said and grinned at him, unrepentantly greedy, as he tugged the bodice of her gown down enough to reveal the curve of her breasts and the pink tips of her nipples, already hard and aching for his touch.

“Why did you want to do this so badly, anyway?” he asked, dipping his head to graze her with his teeth and lave at her with his tongue.

She squirmed, panting hard as she answered. “You look so incredible sitting on this throne. So powerful and confident, relaxed like you own everything around you and we have nothing at all to fear.” She shot him her memories, little moments she had stored away in her mind that showed how she saw him and how it always made her feel.

He groaned, pushing her skirts aside roughly and plunging his fingers into her, a smooth slide to the knuckle that made her buck and gasp.

“You always look so pretty sitting on the arm of my throne,” he growled into her ear. “Such a vicious and deadly little thing but sat at my side so sweetly. Soft, but just for me.”

“Just for you,” she promised, knees spreading and hips arching to give him access as he began to rub decadent circles with his thumb on the little bud of nerves that always brought her so much pleasure.

“I love my ruthless Kyra, and my gentle Rey.” She locked eyes with him, fingers tangled in his hair, and keened as she crested, forced over the top by the rough brush of his thumb and the deep plunder of his fingers. The sound trembled on the air as it reverberated against the walls, filling the room and bouncing back to her to wrap her in the evidence of her own ecstasy. “There you go,” he whispered, the same wonder as he had shown the first time still lacing his voice.

“Now,” she demanded, her fingers plucking quickly at the opening of his trousers. His hissed out a breath when she gripped him, sliding her thumb over him and gathering the wetness already gathering at the tip. He was mesmerized, eyes glued to her movements, as she brought her thumb to her mouth and licked the taste of him from her skin.

“Now,” he agreed and lifted her roughly to position her over him. He slid into her with a rough stroke, and they both moaned as he pressed inside, opening her and filling her until he was buried to the base inside her.

She shuddered, grateful that he was still for a moment beneath to let her enjoy the pulsing fullness. She tipped her head forward until her forehead rested against his and let their shared pleasure wash through her. She tightened herself around him, rocking gently and biting her lip as the delicious friction she created.

His hips stirred, his hips shifting and lifting restlessly into her, as he lost the battle for self-control. She kissed him deeply, her tongue plunging into the depths of his mouth as her body began to move over him in deep and steady strokes that quickly worked them both into a frenzy of need.

He tipped over the edge first with a rough cry that echoed loudly and was joined moments later by her own breathy moans as his pleasure drove her into her a second intense peak. His release was hot inside her- a flood of warmth that coated her insides in waves until he was spent and languid and clutching her limply to his chest.

“I love you,” she said again. “I love my tender Ben,” she began, letting it flow to him as she pressed a kiss to one cheek. He sighed contentedly, and she wondered how her heart didn’t burst with the emotion she held inside her. “ _ And _ my fierce Kylo Ren,” she finished and pressed a kiss to his other cheek, now flashing the dimple that she loved so much, the one that only showed when he gave her his biggest and most genuine smile.

***

Rey watched in amusement as Edelphi flitted happily around her bedchamber, her cheeks rosy and her eyes sparkling with excitement.

“I think someone is excited to see the new chancellor today,” she remarked with a smile, smoothing the skirt of the gown she had chosen for the ceremony and checking her reflection in the large mirror.

The dress should have been unflattering, a solid beige that reminded her strongly of the sands of the Jakku desert, but the heavy floral embroidery that shaped the bodice stopped just blow her breasts, and the skirt fell in layers of sheer fabric from the high empire waist. Sleeveless, the gown’s most striking feature was the gathering of the same sheer material at the back of her shoulders that fell in long lines to the floor on either side of the long row of white pearl buttons that lined the curve of her spine. The draping mimicked the flow of her husband’s capes, giving the whole thing a regal appearance that her gowns so far had lacked.

This was the first time she had worn something that was more appropriate for an empress than a simple desert foundling playing princess, and she tipped her head to contemplate the effect as Edelphi smiled unashamedly and placed the red floral gems in her hair.

“I think you’re right,” she admitted with a giggle. “I don’t know what he was like before we came here, but he’s nothing but sweet to me. He blushes so adorably every time I see him, and even the tips of his ears turn pink when he talks to me.”

“Has he asked you to see him yet? Privately, I mean?”

Edelphi’s smile faded. “Not yet. I only see him when I’m with you and he’s working.”

“Well, we’ll have to see what we can do to fix that. I’m sure he just needs a little encouragement. Men can be such fools in love.”

Edelphi nodded but sighed wistfully. “Kylo is such a good husband. You’re lucky that your man was not such a fool.”

Rey laughed until tears streamed down her cheeks and her stomach hurt, leaving Edelphi staring at her with wide eyes. “He was the worst fool,” she said between giggles. “Remind me to tell you sometime about his truly awful flirting skills. He really had a way of making me feel like nothing.”

***

The tips of Hux’s ears really did turn pink when he said hello to Edelphi before his promotion ceremony began, and he flushed a deep crimson when he realized how closely she was standing to him as he waited for Kylo to finish speaking. Then it would be his turn to address the crowd below.

“I want to wish you good luck and congratulations,” she told him, and Rey noticed that Edelphi’s cheeks too, were a healthy and vibrant pink. Her handmaiden looked lovely in a dark blue cloak, and she had spent extra time today working her long dark hair into a complicated arrangement of braids.

“Ah, yes,” Hux stammered. “Thank you…” He floundered, looking lost. It was nearly time for Kylo’s speech to end and him to accept his new position. “You, uh, you look nice today,” he blurted finally, turning away to join the Supreme Leader before she had a chance to respond.

“I think that actually went very well,” Rey observed as they both watched him stand almost impossibly straight in his flawless back uniform and accept his promotion. It would be the last time he would wear the uniform of a military man, from now on he would wear the robes of a dignitary. He was now a politician responsible for billions of lives.

He would never see it that way, but Rey viewed it as the Force’s way of having him atone for the deaths in the Hosnian system. The payment for death could only ever be life, and she was proud of the small part she had played in seeing that he got the chance to be a better man.

Their small group was subdued when they returned to the palace, each of them quietly lost in their own thoughts until Ben finally spoke into the silence.

“I assume that you're satisfied with your new job and the fact that you no longer have to smuggle an angry lothal cat on board a dreadnought?”

Hux froze, eyeing Ben with suspicion. “You knew about Millicent?”

“Of course. She was the only non-human Force signature on board except for Snoke. He never paid enough attention to notice, but I knew she was there the first day you brought her on board.”

“You never said anything.” It was a statement, but Ben understood the question that Hux hadn’t asked.

“No, I didn’t. We didn’t always get along…” -Hux snorted- “but I wouldn’t hurt the cat because of it.”

“I would have slit your throat without hesitation,” Hux told him bluntly. “And hers, too,” he said, nodding at Rey. “You are too soft.”

“I am not the one with a cat,” Ben said with a smirk.

Hux frowned, “Yes, well…thank you.”

“I might like to come visit her,” Rey interrupted, her smile sweet and innocent. “I haven’t seen the living quarters yet, and Edelphi and I have missed Millicent terribly since we were first introduced.”

Hux’s brows rose, and he looked between the two women in surprise as Rey smiled at him encouragingly. “Ah, of course. You and Edelphi are welcome any time. I’ll send an official invitation as soon as my belongings are delivered to the new quarters.”

His cheeks were pink as he bowed and walked away.

Ben watched him go with genuine amusement, but tactfully waited until they were alone in their chambers for their evening meal to inquire about the situation. “She’s still interested in him?” he asked, his tone plainly conveying that he found it doubtful anyone would be interested romantically in the new chancellor.

“Yes, very much so. I expect I am going to need a new handmaiden soon. Edelphi is going to be busy helping to run Coruscant.”

“We couldn’t have asked for a better woman for that job.”

“It really did work out well, didn’t it?”

“Do you think the queen has any more handmaidens that she could spare? I feel better knowing that you have someone we can trust with you at all times. I still worry about your safety.”

“I’m sure she’ll think of something, but I don’t think every handmaiden I have needs to be trained to the same Edelphi. We’ve dealt with the chancellor, and I don’t imagine we’ll encounter that sort of problem often.”

He frowned, his doubts a steady hum in the Force.

It became apparent the following day how right Ben’s instincts were.

They spent most of the day visiting Hux’s new apartments, since he had sent an invitation early that morning and Rey had rearranged her schedule for the day to accommodate it, laughing shamelessly as Edelphi fussed over her own hair and dress.

She pretended not to notice them fuss and flirt, each of them trying and failing to be subtle about their interest. Watching someone else fall so in love made her wonder how the Resistance had missed the stars in her eyes after the Battle of Crait. Surely, she had been just as obvious, if not more so.

By the time they returned to the palace, Rey was certain that another wedding would be upcoming in the near future, and she couldn’t have been happier for them.

So distracted was she by the relationship blossoming in front of her that at first Rey didn’t recognize what was happening.

She was laughing and talking animatedly with Hux and Edelphi, the three of them walking up the steps into the personal entrance to the palace and flanked on all sides by guards and stormtroopers, when a blur of motion to her left caused her to turn her body instinctively, just missing the deadly heat of blaster fire that sailed past her head.

She reached out blindly with the Force on impulse and wrenched the blaster out of the hand of the man who held it. Her mind worked overtime to try and make sense of the scene that was unfolding before her.

The man that had shot at them had apparently barreled through the barrier of stormtroopers, knocking several of them out of the way as their blaster fire bounced uselessly off the armor he wore. He didn’t seem to have prepared for what might happen if he missed and stopped for a moment in the center of the steps as he watched his blaster sail over the heads of her guards, landing well beyond his reach. He looked around wildly and seemed to contemplate running but decided that whatever fate handed out here would be preferable to the one waiting for him if he failed to kill her.

Rey stumbled back, trying to create room to maneuver in the small space and angry at herself for failing to sense the danger. She tripped into Edelphi, who was attempting to step around her, intent on using her own body as a shield once she realized that her empress was being attacked.

There was a brief moment of total chaos- the two women were both off balance, Hux was shouting obscenities at the guards and waving around his own blaster as he tried to get a clear shot at the assailant, and Vicrul, Trudgen, and Ap’lek were drawing their weapons as they ran up from behind, having fallen back to give the small group some privacy.

The assassin, a large man whose face was hidden behind a primitive mask, charged toward them, and Rey realized immediately that the knights with their bladed weapons would never reach her in time and the stormtroopers couldn’t intervene. They all held blasters ready but, just the irate Hux, they could not fire without risking hitting her and Edelphi instead.

She untangled herself from her handmaiden just in time to step aside as her assailant took a vicious swing at her head, his hand gripping a bladed weapon that shone silver in the afternoon sunlight.

Edelphi surprised her by planting a solid punch in the man’s stomach that had him doubling over in pain, and she followed it up with a well-placed kick that sent him rolling over backward. The blows weren’t enough to keep him down for long, but Rey only needed a moment to reach her hand into her hair and pull out the blade concealed within. She hooked her fingers around the handle, and when he charged her again, she blocked his slash with one arm, her forearm aching under the blow as his connected with it. Her other arm swung upward from her side, burying her own blade in his throat, and coating the front of her powder blue gown with crimson spray.

He crumpled at her feet, choking and sputtering, before falling over and not moving again.

The Knights finally reached her as she pulled her blade free, wiping it on her already ruined gown, and began checking her as well as they could for injuries without actually touching her.

Hux was holding Edelphi and babbling incoherently as his hands roamed freely over her, searching for wounds, and squeezing her tightly when he found none.

“Remove the body as quickly and discreetly as possible,” Rey instructed, giving her Knights a firm look. Her hands shook and she buried them in the folds of her skirt. “All of these guards and stormtroopers are to be assigned to palace duty only until I say otherwise. No need to have them spreading rumors any further than necessary.”

“Are you alright?” Trudgen’s face was still concealed behind his mask, but for the first time, Rey heard concern in his voice. It was often hard for her to remember that they were men, too.

“I’m fine, Trudgen. Please, just remove the body and send someone to find Kylo for me. He needs to know what happened as soon as possible.” She watched him go as she hurried over to check on Edelphi, though Rey was able to be certain very quickly that not only was her friend unharmed and happy to be wrapped in Hux’s embrace, she was also stone faced and dry eyed. She was once again grateful for the training Naboo provided. It took more than one little assassination attempt to upset the queen’s women.

“Are you alright?” Edelphi asked Rey, squeezing her hand and turning to look at the body in disbelief. “I can’t believe how quickly that happened. He didn’t seem to anticipate that we would put up a fight. I can’t imagine being stabbed by an empress in a fancy gown.”

“He thought you would be an easy target,” Hux agreed. “Keeping your skills a secret has certainly helped endear you to the people, but it has put you in danger.”

“I would have been in danger regardless, and this is nothing that we can’t handle. Thank the Force that we came in through the private entrance and not up the main stairs, there should be no witnesses beyond our own guards. We are too close to the final breakthroughs we need to get the new senate running for word of this to get out to the galaxy now.”

***

Trudgen didn’t have to look far- Ben had sensed her panic and was already marching every stormtrooper he could find across the palace to find her when he finally spotted her making her way inside. The red splashed across the front of her yellow gown caused him to go paler than she had ever seen him, and the ground beneath her feet quaked ominously.

“I’m fine,” she said, rushing to reassure him before his turbulent emotions destroyed this wing of the palace. “Really, you should see the other guy.”

He ignored her attempt at humor and caught her up in his arms. She relaxed into him as he held her close and she could feel the thundering race of his heartbeat begin to slow under her ear. “If I ever lost you…wait, what other guy? What the hell happened?”

It only took her five minutes to explain but another hour to calm him down and convince him that the guards and knights were not responsible and had, in fact, behaved admirably by choosing not to shoot her.

“The Knights should have been closer,” he grumbled when they were back in the safety of their bedchamber, watching her peel the bloodstained gown from her body. She tossed it to a droid with instructions that it be destroyed, muttering about the waste of one of her favorite dresses.

“Perhaps, but they were exactly where they’ve always been. Just out of earshot. I should have sensed him. The blame is on me for being complacent.”

He grunted but seemed mollified for the moment.

“Stay here, I need to go and see what can be discovered from the body. Someone is going to pay for this,” he promised.

“I can go with you, Ben. I’m not wounded.”

He hesitated, obviously not ready for her to be in any danger again so soon, but he seemed to decide that she would be safest with him. “I’ll wait for you to clean up and change, but we need to hurry.”

She was showered and changed in minutes, her long hair was still wet as she twisted it into a bun high on top of her head. One look at the blood still drying on her knife had her leaving it on her dressing table and deciding to exchange the blood-soaked gown for the more practical hooded tunic and boots.

Ben said nothing when she fastened her saber to her hip, but his hand was wrapped around hers hard enough to hurt as they swept together down the hallway to where the Knights were standing guard over the body.

A thorough examination revealed little. A shape shifting assassin, nothing more than a mercenary for hire. They were common in the galaxy and this one was experienced enough to know better than to carry identifying information or incriminating evidence.

Ben put the palace on another lockdown, this one even more restrictive than the one following rumors of the chancellor’s poorly planned threats, and Rey worried about the tension he was carrying with him and the dark circles under his eyes.

They had managed to keep the incident a secret, but he was always on edge and frustrated as the days passed without any new information on who wanted her dead. She knew he was feeling the strain when he even began to be snappish with her and wasn’t focused during the increasingly frequent meetings with the delegates. Some had noticed, and whispers began that he was unhappy with the upcoming wedding, that he might even be considering calling the whole thing off.

There was a subtle rumble of discontent at the idea, and Rey redoubled her efforts to look happy and in love.

The knights had combed the underbelly of Coruscant for days, but there was no word on the streets about what had happened or where the threat had come from. It seemed increasingly likely that no one else on the planet even knew that it had happened, and that this incident had come from further from home.

“I think we might need to consider the possibility that the assassin was sent by the Resistance,” his voice was low and tired, but it startled her with its implications.

She rolled over in their bed- her eyes heavy from the sleep they should have been getting- and frowned at him. “Your mother would never sanction this. As long as she’s alive we can be assured that it’s not the Resistance.”

“Why are you so sure?” His brow was furrowed, and she could feel the turbulence of his emotions. “Do you think she would hesitate to take out a threat? She’s authorized attacks against me and the First Order before. It wouldn’t be a stretch to think she might do the same now to you.”

“I think she would try to undermine your authority and she wouldn’t be afraid to meet our fighters in combat, but I can’t see her doing something like this. She loves both of us, despite the choices that she thinks have made us the enemy. It just doesn’t seem right.”

“Would someone else have done it without her knowledge? Poe? That stormtrooper, FN-2187…what’s name now…Finn?”

Rey laughed humorlessly. “No one in the Resistance is that brave. They’d rather see combat, I think, than disobey her again after everything that happened leading up to Crait.”

He nodded, having already discussed with her what they had been told about that fiasco. “You said as long as she’s alive but what if…what if she isn’t? Alive?”

Rey kissed him and looked firmly into his eyes. “I have to believe we would know if something happened to her. We would be able to sense it.” He smiled, but she could feel the tendrils of doubt that remained. “We need to think of other possibilities. The delegates?”

“I haven’t had any issues from anyone. We still have some systems that have not yet sent representation, but the number is dwindling as the talks continue. We’re building faith, not making enemies.”

“Within the First Order? What about Pryde?”

He looked skeptical. “What would he gain? He stands to lose his power and position if we’re overthrown.”

“He was angry that we promoted Hux to chancellor instead of him.” She pressed the memory to him of the murderous glare Pryde had given her and he hummed in disapproval, but she knew he wasn’t convinced.

“I’ll keep an eye on him, but we need to keep looking.”

“Do you have any other suggestions?” Her question was surly, but he didn’t seem to notice and he looked briefly conflicted, as though debating with himself about his next words.

“Not reasonable ones but…”

She waited, letting him sift through his doubts and worries until his thoughts settled firmly into a particular face. “But Snoke is dead.”

“He is, but whatever was in my head after I killed him isn’t. It was angry that you got in its way.”

“The voice hasn’t returned?” It had seemed like much less of a threat once it stopped invading his mind and she felt a stirring of guilt that she had nearly forgotten it as they dealt with the challenges that had arisen since they arrived on Coruscant.

“Not since you came to me on Naboo. My mind has been my own for the first time in my life because of you.”

“I share a great deal of your mind,” she reminded him, nudging playfully at the bond until he smiled.

“I don’t mind- you bring joy and not suffering. I just wish I knew what that was and how to protect you from it.”

“I guess somehow I still attributed the voice to Snoke. A ripple in the Force, or an echo. Maybe even a presence similar to the visions we saw of Anakin. What else could it have been?”

“I don’t know, but it wasn’t Snoke. The last time I heard it, that much was very clear. I don’t think dark side users have the same ability to return, not like Anakin anyway or Palpatine would certainly have tried and I’ve never heard of him attempting it. What I do know is that it was strong and smart enough in its manipulations after Snoke’s death that it nearly cost me you.”

“Nothing could have kept me from you for long, but if you’re certain that whatever it was could be a threat to us maybe we should consider putting more effort into figuring out that particular mystery.”

“Whatever it takes to ensure your safety. You deserve better than to be in danger because my past is catching up to us.”

She kissed away the concern on his face. “We knew this would be a hard process. I knew exactly what I was doing when I came to you and I was prepared to fight the whole galaxy if I had to. I love you, Ben Solo, and I’m going to spend the rest of my life turning the shadows in your eyes into stars.”

“I love you, too, Rey Solo. We’ll send the knights to hunt down whatever information they can find. They can start in the outer rim. They’ll enjoy it and maybe we’ll get lucky.”

“That’s the most we can do right now. We need to get the galaxy sorted before we can devote too much energy to whatever this threat is. We’re chasing smoke at this point, and it might be a long time before we get any answers.”

“The wedding will be the next step. I know my attitude lately has caused some unpleasant speculations about the marriage, but we’ll fix that. The ceremony will be widely broadcast, and it will be followed by our coronations. Once you’re officially crowned, it will give you more authority and you’ll be able to be more open about your power. That’ll make you safer and our positions more secure.”

“That’s the best we can do for now.”

***

Rose’s hand tightened on Finn’s as they watched the Supreme Leader stand stoically on the palace steps and announce the official date for the wedding and coronation. The angry red scar on his cheek had faded to a faint pink line in the months since Starkiller, and the time since Rey had left them to join him had soothed the edge of rage from his eyes. The man before her was a commanding figure in black, but he looked more like a dignified politician than a monster.

Rey stood beside him, calm and certain. Her gown was a simple white sheath, a stark contrast to Kylo’s black but the red gems that winked in the light from her hair and the delicate column of her throat matched the satin lining of his heavy cape.

They were a perfectly matched set, and from the cheers that erupted from the crowd below them on Coruscant, they had been enthusiastically accepted by the people.

Finn and Poe both looked at her, their faces drawn and worried in the dim light.

“What do we do now?” Finn asked.

“What  _ can _ we do?” Poe responded bitterly. “More systems are joining them every day, willing handing themselves over to the First Order’s leadership.”

“The rumors we’re hearing say the talks have gone well. The people are confident, and the systems are happy…” Rose knew they wouldn’t want to hear it, but it needed to be said.

“And have they forgotten why we were fighting? What the First Order has done to people like me?” Finn asked, and she could read the betrayal in his eyes as he looked at her. “What about what they did to your home?”

“What Snoke did,” she said firmly. “Rey and Kylo didn’t do that. They haven’t hurt anyone.”

Her heart ached when he dropped her hand and walked away from her, but she looked at Poe resolutely. “Whatever you two planned, whatever you’ve done, it’s time that you start to really look at what is happening in the galaxy. It isn’t worth throwing away the future because of old hurts.”

“Yeah, maybe,” he agreed, but the look on his face was pained. “You two going to be ok? Finn really hates Kylo Ren after…well everything.”

She twirled the ring on her finger, the plain gold band a comforting weight that represented love and a commitment to work through tough times. “Yeah, he’ll come back, and we’ll work it out. He can never stay mad at me for long.”


	21. Birth of an Empire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Empires won by conquest have always fallen either by revolt within or by defeat by a rival- John Boyd Orr

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just realized I have been working on this story since February and it still isn't finished. I'm sorry it's taking so long. I am trying to keep updates coming, and I promise we are eventually going to get to the end, it's just school and life taking more time than I'd like. 
> 
> If you're still reading this, please know that I am beyond grateful and that every single comment from all of you gives me the strength to continue.

Rey had begun to feel more comfortable in the old Jedi temple.

The halls were still too quiet, and the energy inside still sometimes made her uneasy, but the more time she spent there the more it seemed to tune itself in to her presence. It was almost like it was waiting for her to decide how to move forward, what the future would look like in this place that had, for far too long, been frozen in the past.

The pathway forward wasn’t entirely clear to her, but she was growing more certain with each passing day that they would find it. She was committed to bringing balance and harmony to the Force, just as they were bringing peace to the galaxy. Combining the teachings of the Jedi and the Sith would not be any easier than balancing the needs of a thousand different systems- they were exact opposites in their approaches to the use of the Force- but she wouldn’t have to figure it out alone.

Ben was with her nearly every day, working beside her to clear up usable spaces for study and training and helping her to decipher the Jedi texts she had stolen from Ahch- To. They had placed them in the library next to the broken pieces of Luke’s saber after Rey had asked for a platform to be built to house them and had guards moved to watch over the temple.

Rey had placed one half of the saber down and Ben had placed the other, the two of them together laying rest to Anakin’s legacy. She had paused when they were done, running a wistful finger over the pieces. She knew she would never hold it again- it would remain here, a testament to the destruction that was inevitable when the light and the dark sides of the Force were unbalanced.

Ben had kissed her shoulder and wrapped his arms around her waist as they contemplated the evidence of how close they had come to losing everything on board the  _ Supremacy _ . They had nearly gone the same way as Anakin and Padme and having the saber here would also serve as their personal reminder to not take what they had built from that frightening moment for granted.

They had walked away holding hands, him teasing her about how she needed a teacher until she’d finally agreed to it.

He wouldn’t spar with her yet, not so close to the day of the wedding and coronation when any bruises she picked up would be easily shown by her gowns during the broadcast, but he showed her forms and footwork and exercises to control her breathing.

Rey liked those. Those were easy. It was the meditation that was hard.

Ben could sit for hours, his mind and body still, but when she tried to do it, it made her twitchy and anxious. More often than not, to burn off her restless energy she would end up in his lap, fingers in his hair and her tongue dancing over his until he rolled to pin her beneath him, working his body over hers until they were both exhausted and her cries echoed in the empty spaces.

He insisted she was a distraction, but she knew it was one he didn’t mind.

She’d already distracted him once today, so he’d set her to working on her saber. She had begun to build her own under his careful instructions, and he watched over carefully as she worked on the finer points of the saber’s wiring. The purple crystal she had chosen stayed at her work station near the Jedi texts so she could reference the diagrams as she needed, but the longer she worked with it the harder it had become for her to use the red saber that was always strapped to her hip when she was at the temple.

“It’s like it doesn’t respond to me,” she explained to Ben with a frown, “or at least it does so unwillingly. I’m making my own as fast as I can, but the more I bond with my own crystal the more the red one doesn’t seem to want to work. I have to push into it with the Force, bend it to my will.”

“Can you still use mine?” Ben asked, holding out the hilt with a curious expression.

She flicked the switch and it sparked to life in her hand, red and jagged and spitting sparks. “I’ve always been able to use yours just as well as Luke’s,” she said with a shrug.

“Anakin’s,” he corrected absently. “I wonder if you were able to use that one so easily because you hadn’t bonded with your own crystal yet.”

“Then how can I still use yours?”

“You’re bonded to me,” he said simply. “We might not know how exactly, but we know it’s true.”

“I suppose that explains it,” she said, frowning and leaning down to better inspect a wire connection in her saber and compare it to the diagram she was using in the thickest of the Jedi texts. She had crossed two similar looking wires, she realized, and had to begin that section again.

“Have you decided on a design for the hilt?” he asked. “You’re nearly done with the internal bits.”

She shook her head and bit her lip in concentration. “No, I’m struggling because I would feel more comfortable with a saber staff,” she tapped the book on an illustration that showed how a lightsaber could be fashioned as a double ended weapon that would allow her to fight as she had with her own staff on Jakku. “But I only have one crystal to work with.”

“You fight well with a normal saber,” he said, rubbing a hand over the scar on his cheek.

Rey laughed, “Yes, but I fight  _ better _ with a staff.”

“We have other crystals,” he began.

“But they weren’t for me,” she explained. “I felt no connection to them.”

He picked up the book she was working from and started to flick through the pages. “Maybe there’s something in here about where we can get more.”

“Maybe,” she said, leaning forward to look and then yelping when two wires brushed her bare skin and gave her a shock. “Is there a section on healing, too?” she teased, sucking on the burnt skin of her finger.

“Hmm,” he said after a moment. “Actually, there is.”

“Wait, really?” she tried to peak over to see what he was reading before she remembered that she couldn’t understand a word of it and settled back with a pout.

His brows were drawn together in confusion. “A whole section on healing techniques we were never taught. There are notes in the margins in a newer language that say they stopped teaching it to padawans because death is meant to be embraced and not feared.” His eyes were cold when he looked at her. “They let people die that could have been saved, and the knowledge was lost.”

“Well, we found it and we won’t hide it away,” Rey promised, pressing a comforting kiss to his cheek. “We can train healers here.”

Ben nodded and closed the book with a snap. His ragged emotions soothed away as he reached for her burned fingers and pressed them to his lips. “Does it hurt much?”

“No, not very much. I’ve definitely had worse on Jakku.”

“I want us to learn these healing techniques as soon as we can,” he said, holding her hand in his lap and looking at her earnestly. “We still don’t know who tried to kill you and I’m not taking any chances.” He tapped the book absently, “This might save your life someday.”

“Or yours,” she said, squeezing his hand. “I’m not particularly interested in running this galaxy alone.”

He kissed her, quick and fast, but she felt the love rush over her through the bond, and with it his determination. He would never leave her if he could do anything to prevent it.

“I’m going to do everything I can to make sure that doesn’t happen,” he promised, “and I think we need to try a more direct approach to bringing the Resistance on to our side. I can’t shake the feeling that it’s possible the threat might have come from them, but even if it didn’t,” he sighed and closed his eyes, “I don’t like having that threat out there, too.”

“Are you ready to face her?” Rey asked. She didn’t elaborate- she didn’t need to.

He shook his head uncertainly and his eyes were heartbreakingly vulnerable. “Will you be with me when I do?”

“I’ll always be with you.”

***

The day of the wedding dawned brighter and clearer than any other day since they had arrived on Coruscant. Rey had refused to have anyone else in her quarters, intending to rely on Edelphi to help her dress as she did every other day.

She settled into her seat at the vanity just after dawn, wrapped in a thin silk robe and combing out the tangles from hair that now reached well past her shoulders and was still wet from her shower.

Edelphi had rubbed moisturizer into her skin and sprayed her wrists and temples with fragrance. It was more than she normally allowed, but nearly every minute of the day’s activities would be broadcast across the galaxy, so she wanted to look and feel her best.

“You look lovely already,” Ben told her, sneaking into her dressing room, and pressing a kiss to her cheek as he stood behind her. He hadn’t begun to dress yet, and she let her eyes wander over the pale expanse of his chest beneath his robe.

She never tired of looking at him.

“I’m surprised you’ve managed to avoid Mitaka for this long,” she said. “I was sure he’d have cornered you and started forcing you to get dressed already.”

“He tried,” Ben said with a chuckle. “I threatened to send him back to star destroyer duty if he bothered me again before I was done here.”

“Oh?” She looked at him suggestively, but he shook his head.

“Not that,” he said, laughing at her pout, “at least not yet. I had an idea, if you’re willing, for something that means a lot to me and might just help us reach my mother.”

She turned in her seat, looking up at him curiously. “What is it?”

He plucked at the ends of her hair and rubbed a piece between his fingers. “My mother was from Alderaan, raised as part of the royal family. They had a tradition there, a way of communicating with their hair. There were traditional wedding braids and she taught me how to do all the styles…”

“So, she’d know you were thinking of her and that you’re carrying on the traditions of her home planet?”

“Yes,” he said, but his eyes were sad. “I’m still angry about what she did,” he admitted. “Sending me away, turning her back on me.”

“I know, but you love her, and this is a good start to showing her that. You just need to find some common ground between you.”

“I don’t know if there is any.” He swallowed thickly, and his fear was palpable in the bond, a hot and heavy weight that sat unpleasantly on her heart and in her stomach.

“There is,” she said, kissing his wrist before turning back to face the mirror.

She watched patiently as he combed through her hair, creating sections and intricate twists. His hands were so large, but he made the delicate work look easy as he went, piecing together a complicated updo that would be easily recognizable to his mother.

When he was finished, he stepped back to examine his work and there were tears in both of their eyes.

“Do you think she’ll notice?”

Rey stood up and hugged him, pressing her cheek against his chest as he curled over her. His feelings were scattered and uncertain, and she sent her own calming certainty to him through the bond until she felt his heartbeat slow.

“I am absolutely sure she will.”

There was a knock at the door and Edelphi poked her head in. “Mitaka is out here and he seems a little upset. He says you should have started getting dressed twenty minutes ago?”

“Yes, fine. I’m coming.” Ben kissed her cheek and left Rey alone to finish getting ready.

Edelphi gave her enthusiastic approval of Rey’s hair and had her makeup done in no time but getting her into her dress was a different story altogether. The gown she had chosen for this wedding was almost nothing like the one she had worn for their simple ceremony on Naboo. It was white, and that was where the similarity ended.

Sleeveless and nearly backless, the gown’s bodice pressed tight to her skin, held in place by ribs of stiff boning that didn’t allow for her to bend or move in the waist at all. It was heavy, made of thick brocade fabric that began gathering over itself in large folds at her hips and extended behind her in a train of shimmering white fabric that was more than three feet long.

It was designed as a direct complement to Ben’s simple wedding attire- an all-black tunic and cape that would have them standing at the altar as visual representations of the joining of the light side and the dark. She hoped the symbolism of it would not be lost on General Organa.

She was glad for the months of practice she’d had at walking in complicated gowns, but nothing could have prepared her for the trip they had to make across the palace and down to the front steps. In the end they had to enlist the help of several surprised guards to help carry the train and even then Rey gave it a bit of a boost with the Force.

The energy that it took for her to make her way to the front steps of the palace where the ceremony was to take place made her nearly regret her choice of gown, no matter how well the symbolism worked or what the people’s expectations were of an empress, but she forgot her irritation as she stepped outside and found Ben waiting for her at the altar.

The roaring crowd and the leagues of delegates that were attending as official witnesses faded away until nothing was left but his smile.

She nearly laughed out loud when she reached his side and realized he had arranged for the same officiant that they’d had from their first ceremony, who stood before them now looking much less pompous and much more respectful than he had the first time.

“Am I late this time?” she asked quietly, then smiled at him fondly when he began to babble his apologies.

Ben cut him off with a good-humored pat on the back. “Not everyone gets to marry his emperor and almost no one gets to do it twice. Besides, having you here has clearly made the empress happy.”

“I’m quite glad,” the cleric said, looking up at Ben with wide eyes.

Her husband was tall and commanding beside her as they repeated their vows and the whole galaxy watched her promise her life to him and him to do the same.

A weight lifted off her shoulders as he pushed the second slimmer wedding band onto her finger and the pretense of the past several months fell away. Now openly and officially his wife, she laughed with delight until he kissed her passionately in front of the roaring crowd below. 

***

The wedding had been important, having her beside him had been an integral part of the groundwork they had set in place to gain the acceptance of all the systems, but Ben knew that it was what came next that would change the course of the galaxy.

Only an hour remained until they would step into their destinies.

He’d arranged for food to be brought to their chambers, a quick lunch that they ate together in the brief moment that were able to have alone on this momentous day, both stripped of their wedding finery and wrapped cozily in their robes as they nibbled on fruits and the sweetened meat slices that Rey liked so much.

Her hair was still in the braids he had made, and her makeup was flawless, but her robe had slipped off one shoulder and she had her foot tucked beneath her on her chair as she chewed.

“I love you and you’re beautiful,” he told her.

She smiled, and it lit up her face like sunshine. “I’m sure I don’t need to tell you that you’re handsome, since it was your incredibly good looks that won me over,” she grinned at him when he chuckled softly, “but I love you, too, and I am so glad I don’t have to hide that anymore.”

“So am I, but…”

“But?”

“Are you ready for what comes next?”

She tipped her head to look at him, contemplating for a moment before she nodded firmly. “I am ready. We were made for this.”

Doubts crawled up from inside him, memories of deeds he couldn’t undo. “You were made for this,” he said. “I think I was more just a vessel for you to arrive where you were meant to be. We’ve gotten to where we are because of you. You’ve been the one defending us, killing for us, turning the hearts of the galaxy in our favor.”

It hurt to speak to his shame aloud, but once it was there, he couldn’t keep it bottled up anymore. It was too hard to keep secrets from her.

“We have both done what we needed to do. You kept the First Order together after Snoke’s death, convinced me to join you, convinced the delegates to join the new senate. They were watching you more closely, so it made sense for me to be the one to take out the chancellor. We’re equals in this, Ben, and the galaxy needs you just as much as it needs me.”

He smiled at her, but the doubt remained.

“You’ll see,” she promised, moving around the table to settle into his lap. “I can’t do this without you.”

She stayed there, feeding him off his plate with her fingers, until it was time to start getting ready for their second major task of the day.

He wore black pants and tunic with a cape that had a blood red lining and she wore a gown that bled from black at the tight bodice and waist to a vibrant blue throughout the full skirt. Together their shades of reds and blues blended into a black background- colors that he knew reminded both him and Rey of their first fight on Starkiller base, a deadly conflict between two people who were now coming together to rule.

They had decided that Hux, as the new chancellor, should crown them both and he was waiting on the palace steps when they arrived. His First order uniform was a thing of the past, replaced with a black tunic and breeches, a cape pinned at the shoulder with a silver pin shaped into the symbol of his city. He winked at Edelphi before turning to his duties.

This time Ben escorted his wife down the stairs with her hand on his arm. Hux smiled warmly at them both as he asked Ben to swear to uphold the laws of the galaxy and to put the best interests of his people above his own. Ben’s voice didn’t tremble as he promised, but he knew Rey felt the tremor of doubt in him. He had so much power now, and a wife that depended on him.

He had so much to lose.

After Rey had promised the same, with absolute confidence, they turned to face the churning crowd and Hux placed a crown upon his head. Made of the finest metal the galaxy had to offer, it was a simple unadorned circlet that was surprisingly heavy. He was glad he would only have to wear it for special occasions.

Hux faced the crowd, his voice loud and unwavering as he announced. “Your new Emperor, first of his name, Kylo Ren.”

The crowd cheered wildly.

Kylo stepped forward raising his hands for silence.

“I had found the love of my life in Rey of Jakku. One of you, from a small planet of little significance. She was nobody, but not to me. As all of you mean something to me. She has risen to take her place by my side forever. She leaves behind the name of her uncertain past and takes a new name. I present to you your empress, Kyra Ren.”

The crowd cheered again, more forcefully this time.

Hux stepped forward with Rey’s crown, a glittering tiara in shining silver that Ben had designed in secret. It had five small shards of dark kyber crystal set in the ornamental prongs at the front. Not strong enough to power a lightsaber but still sensitive to the Force, the crystals glowed when placed upon her head and the crowd gasped and murmured reverently.

“We, too, will take a new name,” Rey said, lifting her chin and smiling at her people. “We will no longer be the First Order. That name has brought pain and fear to the galaxy. We do not seek to walk in the footsteps of the Republics or the Empire of old. We leave old things behind and bring a new order to the galaxy.”

Behind them the banners of the First Order fluttered to the ground and the crowd whispered and shifted restlessly.

“We are now the Imperial Galactic Republic,” Kylo stated, and new banners unfurled to take the place of the ones now heaped on the ground. Deep purple replaced the crimson background, and the First Order’s black hexagon now had a white rebellion phoenix in its center. It was a combination of both the colors and the symbols of their old allegiances. 

The message was clear, no more divisions would remain between them.

“This government cannot stand if we are divided,” Rey announced. “And we are once again extending the hand of peace across the galaxy. To those systems who have not yet joined us, you are still welcome.”

“And to the Resistance, however many of you remain, we offer amnesty,” Ben said. “Lay down your weapons and come to Coruscant. You will not be arrested or harmed. Discuss peace with us, and we can move forward together.”

Ben knew the broadcast would focus on his unified stance with his new bride before moving to show the faces of the hundreds of delegates that had come to witness the coronation, each of them cheering along with the crowd. He had made sure that the system of origin would be named for each of them, showing the galaxy and the Resistance the support that this new government had earned since they had arrived here.

His mother would have no reason except her pride to refuse their offer, but he wasn’t sure she wouldn’t turn her back on them just to keep it.

Rey was more hopeful than he was when they finally made it back to their chambers and she flopped herself down on the bed without bothering to even take off her gown. “I think she’ll come,” she said, heaving a tired sigh. “We were convincing enough that I really think she’ll be able to see that we’re working to do good here.”

He sat down next to her and urged her head onto his lap, plucking the pins from her hair and massaging her scalp as her braids came down. “I hope so, but with them or without we’ll continue as we have been.”

She sighed softly, shifting her head so that his fingers could work out the tangles out of the rest of her hair. “I’m so tired,” she admitted. “Today was an abominably long day.”

Ben rolled his shoulders, hoping to ease the tension in his muscles, and nodded. “Me, too. I wasn’t this tired after our first wedding.”

“That was less work,” she said. “Here, can you unbutton this? I already sent Edelphi off to bed.”

He hated the small buttons on her gowns, but he worked them all open eventually and she stepped out of it, letting it pool at her feet and then kicking it off to the side.

“That’s not very proper behavior for an empress, “he teased.

She snorted and stretched out on the bed again, her skin was bare this time except for her undergarments. “That’s exactly how an empress behaves. I do exactly as I wish and someone else will deal with the mess.”

He leaned over and pressed a kiss to her shoulder. “You’ll pick it up yourself before anyone else has to,” he predicted.

“I know,” she said with a grin. “Come on, get ready for bed. Unless you’re planning to wear the cape to sleep in now?”

He tapped her on the end of the nose with his finger. “Maybe I should. It’s very regal.” He laughed when she nipped at his finger, but did as she’d asked, stripping down as he walked to the fresher.

By the time he came back, dripping from his shower, she was already curled around one of their pillows with her hand tucked up beside her face and deeply asleep. She hadn’t even taken her makeup off, and when he slipped in beside her and pulled her against him, she just mumbled quietly and went straight back to sleep.

Her emotions flowed through him, even as she slept. The bond between them had become almost seamless, making them almost an extension of one another. They had developed such a level of love and trust, both now so complete and unwavering, that if hadn’t been for the scar on his face he would have thought he’d imagined their early conflicts.

Now, if his mother decided to put aside her pride and join them, maybe he could finally be sure of Rey’s safety.

***

Leia sighed and rubbed her temples as another member of the Resistance raised their voice in anger. They’d all been arguing for hours about what to do and she was more tired than she had ever been in her life. She had spent a lifetime making decisions that held lives in the balance but none of them had ever twisted her so deeply in two.

Finn slapped his hand down on the table with a crash. “You can’t trust the First Order, and that’s what they are. A new coat of paint and a name change,” he snorted as Poe muttered  _ Imperial Galactic Republic  _ under his breath,  _ “ _ means nothing. Kylo Ren is never going to change and you saw Hux on the broadcast! He was the one behind the attack Hosnian system that cost billions of lives and they’ve made him Chancellor!”

Poe nodded his agreement, though his voice was calmer when he spoke. “If we go to Coruscant and this is a set-up, we’ll never come back out alive.”

Rose, surprisingly, defied her husband and spoke for the first time since the broadcast. “Do you think Rey would do that to you? To us? This government had worked hard to make changes. We’ve already lost the support of almost every system. It’s time to give them a chance.”

“She went to Kylo Ren,” Finn said, turning to her with a disappointed look.

“She went to the man she has now married. The man who has helped in all of these changes. No more war, no more death.” Rose shook her head, holding her hands up in supplication as he stared at her.

“He crowned himself an emperor.”

“He reinstated the senate,” she countered. “And the systems seem happy enough that their concerns are being heard.”

Leia sighed and everyone turned to her. They had clearly reached an impasse, and the deciding vote would be hers.


	22. Resistance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Apologies are not meant to change the past, they are meant to change the future- Kevin Hancock

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My semester is horrible and I hate it, but finally, finally we have reached the Resistance! I feel like this is another major milestone in the story and this chapter is a personal one for me as a writer because this is now my first story that has reached more than 100,000 words! 
> 
> Thank you again to each and every one of you that has supported this story so far. I appreciate all of you so much and I am so grateful that you've like the story that I've come up with.

The announcement came in the middle of the night, the guards outside pounding on the door in a frenzy that had Ben jumping out of bed and rushing to the door with lit saber in hand. Rey watched him go, reaching her hand out for the saber resting on the table across the room and shifting her weight to crouch on the bed behind him, watchful and ready if anything should make it into the room so she could ensure it never made it back out.

“My apologies, my lord,” the guard stammered, stumbling back from the deep red glow as Kylo’s saber crackled and spit in the darkness. “I was told to inform you that the Resistance has arrived in orbit. They are waiting for permission to land.”

“Give it to them,” he said stiffly. “Have them escorted to rooms on the other side of the palace and double the guards on every entrance and exit. Make sure they’re fed and made comfortable and tell them that they will be meeting with me and their empress in the morning.”

“Yes, my lord,” the guard said, turning to rush down the long hallway and signaling to several other masked guards as he went.

“Shouldn’t we see them now?” Rey asked fretfully as he came back to crawl into bed beside her. The sabers wafted through the air to land in their places again as she curled back up onto her pillow. She wasn’t able to see him in the darkness, but she could feel the rolling turmoil coming from in short spiky waves that battered against her consciousness through the bond.

“No,” he said, dropping his head onto her shoulder and pulling her into his arms. “An emperor gets out of bed for no one. We want them here, but she has to know that she’s not calling the shots. We are in charge here- we have to be. If we show weakness…”

“You still think they might try to hurt us, to hurt me,” she mused.

He shuddered and tightened his grip on her. “I can’t take that chance. I’ll kill them all before I let anything happen to you.”

She clucked her tongue at him. “I understand the urge, but I don’t think that will be necessary. Your mother isn’t going to try and hurt me.”

“We don’t even know if she came with them,” he said sullenly.

“Ben…”

“Fine, I can feel her presence already,” he admitted. She had already known that because she could feel it, too, but it didn’t surprise her that he loathed to acknowledge it.

“You’re ready to face her, to put an end to all of this pain,” she assured him. “We are so close, and I don’t think it’s a coincidence that she’s here now, when the reinstatement of a senate is mere days away. She’s giving you a sign of faith.”

“I still hate her,” he said starkly. “I love her because she’s my mother, and I know that what she did brought me to you and all of this, but I hate her for leaving me when I needed her most. She was my mother.”

His pain broke over her and Rey opened herself to it, pulling it from him and into herself, absorbing it before it shattered him again. She couldn’t undo this burden, but she could help to bear it.

He pressed his face into her neck, teeth dragging across her skin as he nipped at her and made her gasp. She knew what he wanted, what he needed when the darkness pulled at him and threatened to drag him under, so she opened her body as she had opened her mind, wrapping her legs around and urging him to settle between them.

She didn’t let him wait, to soften her for welcome as he usually did, but demanded that he take what he needed, thrusting into her before she was quite ready, when the pressure caused a stretch that made her pleasure border on pain and the friction was nearly unbearable.

She hissed out a breath as he began to move, a rough and sloppy rhythm that was selfish and almost violent, and reached for him in the bond, demanding that he take more, insisting that he thrust harder, until he taking her with a force that made her body ache and would leave bruises on her thighs.

He funneled it all- his rage, his hurt, his betrayal- into the pounding movement of his hips and the noises that poured from her throat were almost inhuman as she matched him, pulling all of it from him to hold it inside herself, in the endless void of her own selfish need.

He shifted suddenly, leaning back and dragging her with him until he knelt on the bed with her sprawled across his thighs, one hand fisted in her hair and the other holding tight to her hip as he thrust up into her, each jerk of his hips causing her to bounce and sink down on him again until he was pressing so deeply inside her that she feared he might actually break her in two.

Her nails bit into his shoulder, her teeth into his neck, until blood, black in the darkness, trickled down the pale white of his skin. He grunted when she ran her tongue over the path it had taken, letting the metallic flavor of it spread across the inside of her mouth.

When she kissed him then, letting him taste the evidence of their violence, he erupted inside her, the sudden flood of warmth inside her echoing the waves of knife sharp pleasure in the bond until his peak forced her to hurtle over the edge herself, clenching around him as he held her close to his chest.

She hummed as she settled over his raging heartbeat, her hands following the smeared trail of blood she had left on his skin.

He kissed her temple, nuzzled her neck and she felt the edge of his ragged emotions had soothed, replaced by the unshakeable core of his love for her.

“We’ll handle it together,” she promised. “Always.”

She stayed awake for the rest of the night, listening to the sounds of the palace and monitoring for any signs of distress from the guards at their stations. Urging Ben to trust the Resistance was one thing, trusting them herself was another.

She could feel them, the familiar bright spots of Force energies that she would have recognized anywhere. Leia, Finn, Poe, Rose, even Chewie she realized with a smile. All here, so all still alive and safe. That was why she had left them, why she had agreed to this plan in the first place, but she wasn’t so sure that they would be able to see it that way.

It wasn’t she was going to pretend that she wasn’t madly in love with her husband, that she hadn’t benefitted from fleeing in the middle of the night to join her life permanently with their worst enemy.

She watched the dawn brighten the sky before she slipped out of bed to signal for Edelphi and Mitaka. It was going to be an important day, so they had better get a good start.

She let Ben sleep until the servants delivered breakfast and was pleasantly surprised that he seemed calm and relaxed as they ate. He thanked her for summoning Mitaka and kissed her on the forehead before he sauntered off to get dressed, letting Edelphi in as he went.

Rey’s brows shot up when she saw the armful of fabric and accessories that her handmaiden was carrying. She had gotten used to the everyday finery, but this was over the top. Edelphi hadn’t been this wound up since the day of the wedding and coronation.

“What is all this?” she asked, unable to stop her nose from wrinkling in annoyance. “I want to be able to move and breathe today. What if my mother-in-law tries to stab me?”

Edelphi frowned and looked at her with wide eyes. “Do you think she might?”

“No,” Rey said grumpily, “but I would still like to be able to breathe.”

“You will be able to, but you need to look nice today. Regal, commanding. I’ve heard rumors about General Organa and you need to be able to have just as strong of a presence. You’re not just an orphan from Jakku anymore, you’re her empress.”

“I’m also her friend,” Rey said simply. “I’ll wear that dress for the formal meeting, but please have something more sensible for this afternoon and ask the servants to arrange for a lunch in the gardens for me and…well, everyone else.”

“Of course,” Edelphi agreed, and Rey didn’t protest when she spent the next hour getting her clothes and hair and makeup tended to until Edelphi deemed her presentable enough to meet the Resistance for peace talks.

“Ready?” Ben asked, poking his head into the room just as Edelphi settled the crown on her head and it began to emit its faint ethereal glow.

Rey turned to smile at him and look him over. He was wearing his own crown and heavy black cape, this time with a tunic embroidered with heavy gold and silver thread in a pattern of glittering stars with a border of shining twisting lines.

She chuckled and swept a hand over her own gown, the same pattern crisscrossing over black fabric down over the stiff bodice and long sleeves, cascading to the bottom of the hem of her wide skirt. She had her own cape- much longer and wider than his, that attached at the back of her neck, flowing out from beneath the sharp lines of a collar that began just beneath her chin and curved over the top of her chest before flaring out in stiff peaks above her shoulders.

“It seems we’ve been dressed to match,” he said with a smile, holding his hand out and waiting for her to lift her mountainous skirts and join him.

“I doubt your mother will even recognize us,” she said doubtfully. “I can’t remember a single time I saw her where I didn’t have dirt on my face.”

He laughed bitterly. “You might be right. The last time I saw her, I think I was twelve? How quickly those visits she promised me disappeared.”

She ran a soothing hand over his arm as they started down the hallway, the lines of guards tipping their heads in acknowledgment as they passed. “We all make mistakes,” she reminded him. “Try to give her a chance.”

“I am trying, for your sake and the sake of peace. I am willing to look beyond all past offenses but one.” He looked down at her, his face set in harsh lines. “If I find out that they tried to hurt you, there will be no peace and no forgiveness.”

She nodded, swallowing her worries, and trying to cling to her faith that Leia would not have sunk so low as to send a nameless assassin after them. If she had, no force in the galaxy would be able to stop her husband from raining his vengeance down on all of them.

He would not consider that as an act of war, but a personal offense committed by his own mother against the woman he loved, which she knew would be even less forgivable in his mind than what had happened all those years ago between him and Luke.

She sighed, her hand tightening on his arm, but there was nothing that she could say so she held her tongue as they crossed out of their personal wing of the palace and into the central area where meetings were held and the throne room was located. “Where are we meeting them?”

“Just her, at least for the most part” he told her. “They are all assembled outside the throne room but the only ones that will come inside initially are Leia and whoever she has assembled as her personal guard and witnesses.”

Rey nodded, her stomach tightening with nerves as they approached the massive double doors that led to the large waiting area and then, beyond that, the throne room. She had barely had time to draw a steadying breath before the doors were swept open.

Unease rippled through the Force as well over a hundred familiar faces turned to face them. Rey pulled on that Force, reaching into it for calm and through the bond to Ben to reassure him of her presence at his side as they walked, the murmuring of nervous voices rising from each side as they went.

She spotted Chewie near the throne room doors, easy to see when he was so much taller than the rest. He watched them quietly as they approached, his expression unreadable. The last time he had seen Ben, it had been to fire on him Han’s body had fallen into the depths of Starkiller Base. Her fingers tightened spasmodically on Ben’s arm, and she resisted the urge to try and shield him with her own body as they got closer.

Surely, Chewie wouldn’t try to hurt him now.

A wave of sorrow in the Force drew her attention to the small woman standing beside him, and Rey’s heart tipped in her chest as she saw the tears on Leia’s cheeks.

Rose, Poe, and Finn were standing at her side and Leia was leaning on Rose for support as they passed, her eyes glued to her son’s face as though she couldn’t bear to look away. Rey wanted to go to her, to hug her and Rose and all of them, to put all of the tension and the fighting behind them, but she knew that they were not ready for that step yet. There was official business that needed to be handled before personal relationships could be attended to.

She didn’t turn her head to look more closely, keeping her eyes focused ahead as she entered the throne room and took her seat in the second throne that now sat beside Ben’s. She knew that the guards would follow, that Mitaka and Edelphi would guide Leia and whoever she had chosen as her escort into the room.

Rey settled her hand over Ben’s and waited.

No one spoke until Leia was seated at the long table, in the seat that was usually occupied by Chancellor Hux. Chewie sat beside her, and Poe, Finn, and Rose arranged themselves across from her. She was still looking at her son, undisguised pain in her face.

“General Organa,” Rey said softly, breaking the tense silence, “ _ Leia _ , welcome to Coruscant and our home.”

Leia’s eyes moved finally to look over Rey, her face softening as she met Rey’s gaze. “You look well and happy,” she remarked. “I am hopeful that our meeting today can be the end of hostilities…Empress Kyra.”

Rey smiled. “I think it’s alright for you to still call me Rey when we are in private. Ben still does.”

Leia swallowed and looked uncertainly at her son. “Ben,” she echoed quietly to herself, obviously surprised to hear that he answered to anyone calling him by his given name.

Ben cleared his throat. “We have no desire to continue any aggressive actions against the Resistance. The first meeting of the new senate begins in two days, the last violent skirmish was over months ago and nearly every system in the galaxy has joined the Imperial Galactic Republic, all of them willingly.”

Leia looked around at the newly redecorated throne room, the old banners of the First Order and the stone carvings of the Empire were both gone, replaced by purple and the emblem of the new government that Ben and Rey had created.

“And yet,” she said, looking at him sadly, “you sit on a throne and call yourself an emperor.”

“I am an emperor,” he said bluntly, and Finn began to shake his head angrily.

“See?” he asked loudly. “There is no negotiating with the First Order, with Kylo Ren.” He pointed to Rey, and she lifted a brow at him in surprise. “Not even with her- look at her and what she’s become.”

“Sit down, please,” Rey said quietly, and Ben held up a hand to stop the guards from advancing closer, their unease drawing them in as they perceived a threat to the empress from Finn’s raised voice.

Rey could feel Kylo’s annoyance simmering- he didn’t like anyone speaking to her that way- and she squeezed his arm gratefully as he remained silent.

“I won’t,” Finn said angrily. “Not after what you’ve done to the galaxy, to Rose’s home planet, to the kids in the stormtrooper program. What about them?” He gestured to the guards, faceless behind their helmets.

“I am the head of the stormtrooper program now,” Rey said calmly. “The theft of the galaxy’s children has been banned, new recruits are taken in willingly and trained as adults. Those who were already taken as children, as you were, have been given the option to participate in a program that would allow them to access their records and attempt to find their families. So far, in the months since the policy was implemented, twenty-five percent have requested access to those records and ten percent have elected to remain with their families once they found them.”

Finn frowned at her, his expression setting into a confused and mutinous line.

“As for planet’s that were harmed by the First Order, they were placed first in line for programs designed to repopulate and repair the damage caused. The Otomok system was the first to benefit from those programs. I cannot restore the lives lost,” Rey said, looking at Rose sadly, “but I have asked for their cities to be rebuilt and their ecosystem repaired as much as we are able.”

Finn sat down with a glare, but Rose sniffled a little beside him, apparently unable to stop herself from smiling at Rey when she thought Finn wasn’t looking.

“Every effort has been made to ensure a government that is neither tyrannical nor ineffective,” Ben said from beside her.

Finn and Poe grumbled, but Leia silenced them with a shake of her head. “Regardless of my personal feelings on the idea of a functioning government headed by an emperor, the fact remains that there is no longer support for a Resistance. The galaxy, as you said, has given you their enthusiastic support. It is in the best interests of the lives of everyone I am responsible for if I arrange for our official surrender and accept the offer of peace that you promised us.”

Ben nodded. “There are no terms that we ask of you, beyond the disbanding of your forces and that everyone return to their homes without intent to cause harm. I have only one question before that offer goes into effect.”

Rey stiffened, looking at Leia as her son spoke to her directly.

“Did you try to kill my wife?”

Leia blinked at him, confusion radiating off of her in waves that were clearly readable in the Force. “What?”

“Did you,” he repeated slowly, “or anyone in the Resistance, attempt to have Rey assassinated?”

“Ben,” Leia said sadly, “do you really think I would allow that?”

“You’d be surprised what I think our family is capable of,” he said cryptically. “In this, though, it seems that you are not the one responsible.”

He looked to Rey, seeking her opinion, and she nodded in relieved agreement.

“Then you have our offer,” he said to Leia, “disband your forces and they can leave peacefully, or remain here to start new lives if they prefer.”

Leia looked at him for a moment, her eyes swiveling briefly to Rey, who once again nodded in reassurance. “Very well,” she said, “I agree to those terms.”

“Good,” Ben said swiftly. “You may all remain at the palace while you make your decisions about where you would like to go. Transportation will be provided for those who wish to return to their home worlds, and I believe that we can make arrangements for living quarters and jobs for those who wish to remain here.”

“We would like to request several of you specifically to remain,” Rey added. “There are advisory positions available that we believe you would be uniquely suited for.”

“Oh?” Leia looked at her with such hope in her eyes that Rey’s own heart nearly shattered.

“Leia, of course, there is a place for you,” she said quickly. “You have so much experience in diplomacy and we need someone to train and lead the new mediation team. Systems having disputes will meet with experts to help them come to a peaceful resolution before they have to come before the emperor to plead their cases.”

“We actually have special positions in mind for all of you,” Ben told them, “and a few of the others that are still waiting outside. We can discuss that with each of you individually over the course of the next few days. I believe the empress has arranged for a less formal meeting with all of you later today.”

Rey nodded, smiling warmly at everyone. “A lunch for all of us in the gardens that should be ready in a few hours. I think there are still many things that we’d all like to say to each other, smaller details that still need to be worked out individually.”

“We’ll let you inform the others about their options, discuss things amongst yourselves,” Ben said, waving a subtle hand at the guards, who opened the doors that separated the throne room from the waiting room beyond. It was a clear dismissal, and everyone seated at the table rose to leave.

Rey could feel her husband’ arm stiff under her fingers as he watched his mother turn to leave and an echoing ache that came from both mother and son. Reacting instinctively, she leaned forward and called out softly.

“Leia, would you mind staying behind for a few moments?”

She hesitated, correctly reading her son’s surprise as she turned to gauge his reaction but nodded when Rey beckoned her closer with an encouraging hand.

“General,” Poe said, giving his head a small shake that had Ben bristling. “You don’t have to stay here alone.”

“I think I can manage a word alone with my own mother,” Ben said in a clipped tone.

Poe took a step forward, stopped only by Rose’s hand on his arm. “She’d be dead if you’d gotten your way on Crait. All of us would be, and for most of us that wouldn’t even be the only time you nearly killed us.”

Rey heard Finn mutter something his breath that sounded a lot like “Starkiller Base” and sighed heavily. They had come so far, but wounds like these took a long time to heal.

“And here we are,” she said sweetly, “not actively trying to kill each other. That’s progress, now isn’t it?”

Poe turned on his heel and walked out, causing Ben to grumble loudly enough that the guards stepped forward, prepared to chase him down and bring him back until Rey shook her head and sent them back to their places.

Finn, Rose, and Chewie followed him out, all looking cautiously over their shoulders at Leia as they went.

“Please close the doors,” Rey instructed and before they had even swung shut, she had stood from her seat and taken the few steps required to wrap her mother-in-law in a desperate hug. Leia stood frozen for a moment, shock emanating into the Force around her, before she softened and wrapped her arms around Rey, clinging to her as she sniffled a few subtle tears.

“I missed you,” Rey whispered fiercely, "and I am so sorry that I had to leave you the way I did.”

Leia pulled away, wiping her tears. “Why did you leave?” she asked. “What happened?”

“That’s such a long story,” Rey said with a laugh. “I suppose the simple version is that I was in love with your son and I wanted that love to end the violence instead of making it worse. We decided to stop the fighting.”

“How could you…You barely knew him.” Leia looked at him questioningly and he shrugged.

“I know you must have so many questions about that,” Rey told her, “but I think that are more important things that we need to discuss.”

“Rey,” Ben’s voice was heavy, and his presence in the Force was spiked with nerves.

She shook her head. “I know that you two have a lot of…problems in your relationship, but you can’t expect them to get better if you don’t try to talk about it.”

“Where are we supposed to even begin?” Ben stood up abruptly, his agitated steps carrying him quickly to her side as he reached for Rey's hand without thinking, automatically seeking her in his moment of distress. “Thanks a lot, Mom, for lying to me about my heritage and shipping me off to a religious cult because you were scared of me?”

Leia opened her mouth wordlessly and Rey huffed out a strangled laugh. “If that’s what you feel, then that’s where you start,” she said.

“No,” Ben said stiffly, “let’s start with something else. Hi, Mom, sorry I killed Dad.”

“Ben, please,” Leia reached for him, but he pulled away.

“Oh, no, wait,” he said quickly. “Sorry I overthrew the government and destroyed democracy.”

Rey’s lips twitched, and she had to turn her face away to hide her smile from Leia. Ben had always been more than a little dramatic. It was the Skywalker blood in him, she was sure of it.

“Ben I…” Leia’s voice was soft with unshed tears. “I’m sorry,” she said brokenly. “I’m sorry that I lied to you and I’m sorry that I sent you away. I’m sorry that I was too afraid and too ashamed to come after you.”

He turned to look at her, his face still hard even as he was confronted with her smallness and how fragile she looked. Rey stepped into him, pressing her face into his chest and urging him through the Force to look at her. When he did, his eyes were dark and wounded.

_ She is not responsible for Luke’s mistake _

Rey pushed the thought into his mind and with it the memories that she had of her conversations with Leia, the pain and regret that had always laced her presence in the Force whenever someone mentioned the son that she believed she had lost.

_ She doesn’t know what happened _

Rey felt him waiver and the shield of his anger slip to reveal a well of hurt and betrayal beneath.

_ Let her try to be the mother she should have been _

He dropped his forehead to hers and she felt his surrender in the small tremor that ran through him. His voice in her mind was resigned.

_ You are stubborn, my love _

He let her go, turning to face his mother as she watched them curiously. “We both have a great deal to be forgiven for,” he told her, “but maybe…maybe we could try.”

He opened his arms and stumbled a little as Leia flung herself at him on a broken sob. “All I ever wanted was to have you back,” she cried, and her tears wracked her small frame as Rey looked on in concern. It seemed that once the dam of her emotions broke, years of turmoil began to tumble out at once.

“I really am sorry about Dad,” he told her, pressing his cheek to her hair. “There’s so much about what happened that I need to explain, things that made me into the monster I became, but I want you to know that I am sorry about that.”

“ _ I’m _ sorry about your Dad,” she told him, leaning back to grab his face in both hands. “I sent him to find you. I asked him to bring you home. He knew you weren’t ready, but he was trying so hard to fix our family because I didn’t listen.”

“Mom, it’s not your fault, you couldn’t have known how far into the darkness I had fallen.”

Rey sat back down on her throne, her chin in her hand as she watched the beginning of a bond start to form between them. It would take time to rebuild trust but acknowledging that they wanted to try was the first and most important step.

She smiled when Leia reached into the pocket of her dress and pulled out a set of familiar gold dice. “Here,” she said, pressing them into the palm of Ben’s hand. “He would have wanted you to have these.”

Ben closed his hand around them, but he shook his head. “I don’t think he would have wanted me to have anything. He wouldn’t have forgiven me and I don’t deserve these.”

Leia shook her head, refusing to take them back and he looked around helplessly until Rey held her own hand out. “I’ll keep them for now,” she said, “until you’re ready.”

He nodded and let them fall into her hand, the warm metal meeting her skin as everything went black around her.

When the light returned, she found herself watching a younger version of Han and Leia, his head resting on the soft swell of her stomach with a mystified smile on his face.

“It’s a boy,” Leia said certainly. “He’s feisty.”

“Of course, he is,” Han said. “We’re his parents.”

Rey stepped toward them, but they vanished and now Han was pacing the floor of a small room, a bassinet in the corner and a screaming baby in his arms.

“It’s okay, kiddo,” Han said, bouncing his son in his arms and trying awkwardly to soothe him. “We’re gonna have to figure this thing out together.”

Ben settled in his arms and Han’s smile was pure relief.

A happy squeal behind her caused her to turn, and Ben was a toddler now, running to his father as Han stepped off the Falcon. “Da da da da da,” Ben screamed as Han swept him up in his arms and hugged him.

“Missed you too, kiddo!”

Scene after scene unfolded of Han and Ben, the bond between them sometimes rocky but always present until Han walked away and left him at Luke’s. Ben didn’t see the haunted look on Han’s face, but Rey saw it now.

She saw his uncertainty and his regret, just as she saw his hope as she stepped out to confront his son on the walkway deep inside Starkiller Base.

It caused her heart to ache, because she already knew what the outcome would be, but the Force flooded her with Han’s emotions as she watched him. His tremulous hope, his fear, but mostly his determination.

He knew, she realized, that he would most likely not survive this encounter, but he went willingly anyway, his love for Ben a clear beacon in his heart.

She jumped when the crackling red saber sprang to life, but this time she saw what she had missed the first time- the gentle brush of Han’s thumb on Ben’s face. The Force gifted her with Han’s last moments and the forgiveness he already felt toward his son.

When the vision cleared her cheeks were wet with tears and she found Ben and Leia both staring down at her with concern.

“Oh, Ben,” she said, reaching eagerly for his hand and stretching her mind out to his while the images were still fresh. “Look!”

She poured it into him, the certainty that she had that his father had loved him until his last breath, the forgiveness that he feared he would never earn that he had already been granted. When she was done, he sank to his knees and wrapped his arms around her waist.

“He forgave me,” Ben said brokenly into her stomach. “My father forgave me.”


	23. Bearing Fruit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Be afraid not of growing slowly, be afraid only of standing still- Chinese proverb

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can almost see the light at the end of this tunnel now! I am not starting any more WIPs so as I finish each of the ones I have now, it will give me more time to spend working on the others. There's still a lot left to explore but truly I think that it will seem to go by pretty quickly if I can stick to the outline I have and not have to up the chapter count any more. 
> 
> Thank all of you for your continued support, this has really done a lot to help me process my grief after TROS and I could not have made it this far without each of you!

Rey’s garden had become lush and green in the months since her arrival on Coruscant. The paths wound through a sea of fragrant flowers and branches that dipped beneath the weight of heavy fruits in every color. She had spent as much time as she could spare here, harassing the amused gardeners into teaching her the names of the plants, their systems of origin, their uses to heal or to harm.

She had charmed Ben into eating meals with her out here often, preferring to sneak off for a private breakfast or lunch tucked away in the shade of a tree with leaves bigger than both of her hands that were so brightly green that they nearly glowed in the sunlight.

All of the greens were more beautiful than she had ever imagined, and some days that glowing, effervescent shade was her favorite, others she liked the hues that were tinged with edges of blue or so dark that they were nearly black. All of them were uniquely precious to her, as was the sound of the fountains that Ben had ordered installed throughout her haven. The sound of flowing water was everywhere, a constant reminder that she would never again feel her skin parched and cracking for lack of moisture, never again feel her throat ache for the relief of a single drink.

As this place had become a refuge for her in the midst of her busy life and she had often imagined that, someday, if all went according to plan, she would sit here with the members of the Resistance as she had sat here with delegates and politicians. 

It had been a faraway dream- the idea of peace with Ben’s mother and her most precious friends…

Her eyes misted as she walked down a familiar garden path in the bright shine of the sun to find them truly there waiting for her after so long, shuffling their feet nervously as they nibbled on the lunch she had asked to be provided and looked around at what she was sure was a miniature jungle worthy of reminding them of Ajan Kloss.

It occurred to her that it was strange to have their separation and their reunion in a background that was similar with circumstances that were so different. There was no sneaking to be done now, no more secrets to be kept. There was still work to be done today, but it was the work of healing and hope.

She took a deep breath to steady herself before the others noticed that they had arrived, the scent of her favorite flowers filling her nose, and was pulled abruptly off her feet with a yelp of surprise.

She felt Ben’s rage from his place beside her, and the cool to reluctant amusement that immediately followed. She laughed and wrapped her arms around Chewie as he swung her high into the air and wrapped her in a hug that was hard enough to make her ribs ache in protest.

He must have decided that it was an acceptable time to greet her properly, now that the official discussions of peace were behind them.

“I missed you, too,” she squealed, smiling up at his worried face. There was a moment of confusion before she realized that he was concerned about her because of Ben. She had spent so long surrounded by Knights and loyal guards and First Order officers that she had almost forgotten that the Resistance didn’t trust her husband to take care of her properly.

Ben loved her so well and so openly that she was certain everyone on Coruscant would have the idea of their emperor ever causing harm to his wife absolutely laughable, but Rey was reminded now that this had not always been the case. She had returned to Chewie in tears after the events of the Supremacy, and they would need time to soothe his worry.

She patted the Wookie fondly on the arm, and turned a smiling face to Ben. “Chewie, I believe you know my husband?”

Chewie grumbled reluctantly and Rey abruptly recalled that the last time the two of them had been face to face, was the night of Han’s death.

“Chewbacca,” Ben said stiffly, and she felt the ripple of unease in him, the bright flash of memory that came with a blow and a burn in his side, the way instinct and the Force had cushioned the deadly impact to save his life at the last moment.

Rey floundered, at a loss for how to bridge the gap between them, until Chewie simply took matters into his own hands, quite literally sweeping the emperor off his feet and into an aggressive embrace.

“Chewie,” Ben choked, “put me down.”

Chewie held on, warbling regret and forgiveness until Rey pressed a hand to her mouth to stifle her smile as Ben finally relented and hugged the Wookie back. “I know, Uncle Chewie. I’m sorry, too…for everything.”

This seemed to be enough for the onlookers, thoroughly aware that the royal couple had arrived since Rey's surprised shout, began to press closer, eager to get a closer look or to pass along their own greetings. Chewie put Ben back on his feet and as soon as his boots touched the ground, they were bombarded with the sound of droid beeps and whirs.

Rey looked down to find BB and R2 leading the charge, with C-3PO right behind them.

Leia was standing not far away, apparently amused, and content to let the others have their say before she spoke to them again herself.

“Mistress Rey,” Threepio said fondly, waving his arms about excitedly. “How  _ happy _ I am to see you. I told the others when you left that the odds of you not being slain by Kylo Ren were ninety- five thousand, one hundred and eight to one. No listened to me, of course, but now here you are. I can’t imagine what you were thinking, marrying that Kylo Ren, even if he  _ is _ Ben Solo."

He turned to look at Ben as Rey choked back a nervous giggle. 

My apologies, Master Ben, but you have not been on your best behavior these past few years. I  _ do _ wish you had not killed Han Solo or fought Master Luke on Crait…”

“Threepio, please,” Rey said with a stilted laugh. “We are quite glad to see you, too. Aren’t we Kylo, darling?”

Ben looked pained but he nodded. “Please, in the future, refer to Rey as Empress Kyra.”

Rey nodded encouragingly and whispered, “We are keeping Emperor Kylo’s true identity a bit of a secret, Threepio. Would you mind terribly? Mistress Rey and Master Ben are acceptable when we are alone with Leia, but not in front of anyone else. Please.”

The droid bowed. “Of course, I  _ am _ a protocol droid, after all, Empress Kyra.”

Artoo chirped his agreement and Rey looked down at the two shorter droids, laughing at both of them trying to tell her their stories of what had happened since she had seen them last at the same time, in a series of ever increasingly loud beeps.

She nodded along, waiting for them to reach the end and then congratulating them both on being so brave and loyal to their friends. “Speaking of friends…” Rey muttered, waving at Leia to come closer. “Leia, would you mind coming here for a moment?”

When the general stood beside her, and everyone was looking at her quizzically, Rey put her hands on her hips and looked at Artoo and Threepio.

“Did you know Anakin Skywalker?” Rey asked bluntly, deciding it was best to get straight to the point. Threepio was immediately obviously confused but Artoo, beeped a suspiciously evasive denial. “Artoo,” she said quietly, putting all of her newfound authority behind the word, until he sheepishly admitted that he had, indeed.

“What?” Leia asked, looking at the familiar droid as though she had never seen him before.

Immediately, he was relating the full tale, leaving his friends standing around him with their mouths open in shock as he filled in details no one had known about the former Jedi knight, his love affair with Padme, his tragic fall to the dark side, and the unfortunate events surrounding the birth of the woman standing before him, a mother herself now.

“Why didn’t you ever say anything?” Leia asked, clearly hurt and perplexed.

Artoo explained sadly that Threepio’s memory had been wiped and that, in the beginning, Obi-wan had asked him to keep it all a secret, not wanting Luke to know the truth about the identity of Darth Vader. By the time Vader’s identity had come to light, admitting that he had known it all along would have been awkward after spending so many years side by side with Luke.

“You let me kiss my own brother,” Leia muttered bitterly, and then shrugged when her son and daughter-in-law both turned to look at her in surprise. “I didn’t  _ know _ he was my brother, and I was trying to make Han jealous.”

“This is exactly why I turned out so messed up,” Ben said with a grimace. “What kind of family was I born into?”

“One that loved you,” Leia said quickly. “Even if I wasn’t the best at showing it.”

Artoo beeped a solemn apology and Leia shook her head, clearly exasperated. “I have more questions about my mother if you don’t mind, Artoo."

"Why don't you two go find a quiet spot to talk," Rey suggested. "There's a lovely little seating area near the big fountain over there. You won't be disturbed."

"Thank you, Rey," Leia said, giving her and Ben a quick hug before heading off toward the fountain with Threepio and Artoo.

"That went better than I expected," Ben said quietly, his voice in her ear low and amused. "Can we hope for everything today to go so smoothly?"

"Certainly not," Rey said, turning to smile at him as she was greeted by other members of the Resistance. "Though maybe that will keep her from jumping immediately into questions about what happened between you and Luke."

He grunted, but he looked hopeful. He had already talked about his father today, bringing up Luke was simply too much in such a short time. 

Rey made her way through the crowd, smiling and shaking hands with people until she finally spotted the face she had been looking for since she entered the garden. Rose was sitting serenely at a small table in the shade and Rey smiled when she saw that Finn was hovering over her protectively. He had a scowl set on his face and he was looking grumpier the closer they got, but he was here, and so was Rose, and Rey could not have asked for anything better.

At least she thought so, until she finally reached them and noticed what she had not noticed in the tension of the meeting room- the glint of gold on Rose’s finger.

“Oh,” she said, watching Rose’s widening smile as a quick glance at Finn’s hand confirmed her hopes. “I’m so happy for you,” she said quickly, bending to hug her friend. Her eyes widened and she straightened quickly her gaze flying to Rose’s face and then subtly to Finn’s.

“It’s ok,” Rose assured her. “He knows.”

“A baby,” Rey said, sniffling delicately and hugging Rose again, more gently this time. “I’m so happy for you.”

“I’m happy that she won’t be born into a galaxy at war,” Rose told her sincerely. “Thank you for that, and for what you’re doing for the Otomak system.”

“I’m just sorry Paige isn’t here to see it,” Rey said.

“And just like that, it’s all supposed to be fine, huh?” Finn said angrily, waving a hand at Ben and taking a step forward that had both the royal guard and Edelphi shifting uneasily. “Like he didn’t try to kill me on Starkiller Base? Like the First Order didn’t try to kill both of us on the  _ Supremacy _ ?”

“They tried to kill me, too,” Rey reminded him, begging Ben through the bond to let her be the one to do the talking. She could feel the anger sitting heavily in his mind, but he was silent as she continued. “We were also trying to kill them.”

“That’s not the same,” Finn said hotly. “There wouldn’t have been a war if they hadn’t done what they did to the galaxy.”

“Maybe not,” she admitted, “but it certainly wasn’t the way the kids of the First Order were taught to look at it. They believed that the New Republic had stolen the galaxy from the Empire.”

“I was raised by the First Order and I didn’t do any of the stuff  _ they _ did,” he insisted.

“I know you are worried,” Rose said, her hand settling on her stomach, only just beginning to round, “but the galaxy is no longer at war. The injustices are being corrected."

“You will have the chance to help undo the wrongs,” Rey told him, eager to support Rose and help Finn understand how hard she had worked to make the galaxy a better place. “We want you to help us with the stormtrooper program. We need someone that can really help us make sure that the lives of our soldiers are protected, and they are treated well. Someone who knows what it’s like.”

Rose looked at him excitedly. “You could do so much good for them, Finn! Help them so much!”

“I don’t…”

“As we discussed before, they already have the option to find their background, their families. We want those who stay and those who have chosen to join after we changed to adult recruitment to have good lives.”

“They need families,” Finn said reluctantly, looking at Rose. “They need to be stationed in one sector of the galaxy and allowed to have families.”

“That’s excellent,” Rey said with a smile. “We can arrange for you to meet with the necessary officers as soon as possible, get you familiarized with the changes we’ve already made.”

“Hey, I didn’t say I was going to…”

“That’s so exciting,” Rose babbled, talking over her husband’s protest until he sighed. “That means we’ll get to stay here.”

Rey nodded. “Absolutely, I have a specific job for you, too, if you want it now. The very young kids in the stormtrooper program have been returned to their parents, but some of them have no memories of their families and it was decided that it would be too traumatic to separate them immediately from their caretakers. They’re all being given access to holovids and visitation when they’re ready but for now, we’ve set up a center for them. Ideally, it would serve as a model for orphan care throughout the galaxy, a way to see what works best, and I need someone very compassionate to help with the process. I couldn’t think of anyone better.”

“So, no more kids working alone in the mines?”

“Or scavenging parts in the desert,” Rey confirmed. “We want to make sure we have a good system in place that is sensitive to their unique needs and then we’ll begin implementing it throughout the galaxy, starting with the sectors that were hardest hit by war or poverty.”

“You really have put a lot of thought into this,” Rose said approvingly.

Rey nodded happily, starting to relax and feel like they were making significant progress, when Finn suddenly lunged forward, only to be brought up short by the edge of Edelphi’s blade pressed against the skin just below his eye.

“You bastard,” Finn said dangerously, and Rey turned to find Chancellor Hux standing beside Ben, one brow lifted in sardonic amusement.

“Ah,” he said, “I remember you.” His gaze swept over Finn to land on Rose. “And her. She bit me.”

“You deserved it,” Rose said flippantly.

“Perhaps,” Hux said with a shrug. “You did kill a very good friend of mine that day, so I would consider it to be perhaps an even trade.”

“Phasma,” Finn said angrily.

“Exactly,” Hux said, placing a hand on Edelphi’s arm. “Let him go,” he told her softly, but she remained as she was, her hand trembling slightly.

Finn looked between the two of them in surprise. “ _ Him _ , really?”

Edelphi took a step forward, crowding angrily into Finn’s space, her eyes narrowed.

“Edelphi, please,” Rey said desperately, stepping between them and pushing her arm down until the knife in her hand rested against her side. “There is a lot of anger on both sides, but Finn is  _ not  _ going to hurt my chancellor. Right, Finn?”

Finn shrugged, clearly not convinced.

“Please just go,” Rey said in frustration. “ Chancellor Hux, please take Edelphi with you when you leave.”

Edelphi opened her mouth to protest, but Hux squeezed her arm softly and she closed her mouth again with a sharp, frustrated click of her teeth.

“I just came to find the Emperor,” Hux explained quickly. “A minor dispute between delegates over Coruscant’s trade routes that I hope can be resolved before the first senate meeting.”

Ben sighed and pressed a hasty kiss to Rey’s temple.

“I love you and I’ll be back as soon as I can,” he promised, and then quickly directly into her mind…

_ Try not to let them murder each other _

She smiled up at him sweetly, ignoring the way Finn’s eyes had narrowed as she spoke. “I love you, too.”

_ Easier said than done, my love _

He smirked and strode away, taking Hux and a worried Edelphi with him, and left Rey standing alone beneath the trees with Finn and Rose.

“Has he ever apologized for any of it?” Finn asked bitterly.

“Hux or the emperor?”

“Both, but let’s start with Hux.”

Rey hesitated and then settled on honesty. “No, he hasn’t. He never will. As far as Hux is concerned, everything happened as it needed to for the galaxy to be at peace. The lives lost were unfortunate, but necessary.”

“That’s a horrible way to think,” Finn said, shaking his head.

Rey shrugged, grabbing a glass off the table and taking a sip of Andoan White as she tried to compose her thoughts. Her next words were important if she was ever going to get Finn to understand why things were more complicated than they seemed on the surface. Her stomach rolled a bit as she contemplated the idea that he might never forgive her, never be willing to give the new government a chance.

She looked up at the ripe fruit hanging above her, the spiked skin a deep purple over silky white flesh inside, and sighed. Her garden had not been made so easily, or so quickly. Convincing Finn would be a long and difficult process, but she had to keep her hope and be willing to do the work, dad by day, if she was going to have any chance of succeeding.

“You and Rose saw a great deal of unhappiness under the First Order and I understand your resentment. I ask you now to understand mine," she said, looking at him earnestly as he listened to her words. He did not interrupt, and she considered that a good sign. "I was raised on a planet that was controlled by the New Senate…as an orphan and a slave. The government was well intentioned but flawed- they could not provide safety or order and many of their citizens still suffered.”

Finn frowned, and she could sense how much he wanted to argue, but that he was not able to explain away her point.

“Ideally, change would have come without violence," Rose said, reaching for his hand and holding it tightly in her own, "but that is not what happened. So, now we have to make the best of the course we were given.”

“And having them in charge makes the best of it?" he asked, looking at his wife with conflict in his eyes. "How did making Hux the chancellor of Coruscant help anything?”

“He is putting his considerably single-minded focus on the welfare of a billion people," Rey answered. "His time with the stormtrooper program has unique insights into the psychology of his citizens. He gained their loyalty in a remarkably quick time, prevented countless deaths by avoiding large scale riots and has improved the problems with education, food supply, and overcrowding in the lower levels to the point where they are nearly unrecognizable in only a few months’ time.”

“And Kylo Ren…”

“He allowed it, encouraged it. He has worked hard every day since we began this process to ensure the galaxy was peaceful and prosperous for all its citizens.”

“He’s a bad person, Rey. You know what he did to us.”

“I love him,” Rey said flatly, exasperated now that the conversation was continuing to go in circles. “I cannot force you to like him or attempt to understand him. I can’t force you to stay here and try to help us with the progress that we still need to make- it would be faster with your help, but we can do it without you if we have to.”

“Rey…”

“You don’t have to forgive him, or me," Rey said, more gently now because she knew he was justifiably struggling with past trauma, "but it will not change what we have accomplished, what we will still accomplish. I made the choice to let the hurts of the past remain there to build a stronger future- you have the same option, but I cannot make you take it. You  _ are _ free to go with our blessing, if that is what you choose for your family.”

She leaned in to give Rose a gentle hug and smiled softly at Finn.

“Time and love change people," she told him. "There’s still a great deal that needs to be worked out, but when you are deciding whether to stay, I hope you remember that.”

With that she turned away and left them- Finn with his face still set stubbornly and Rose rubbing his arm lovingly as she spoke to him, waving her hands animatedly. Rey knew that Rose wanted to stay here, that she was excited about the projects that they could be working on, about the possibility of having her baby in a place that was safe and comfortable. For now, Rey's hopes for reconciling with her friend were largely in his wife's hands, but she wasn't as worried as she would have thought- love and time did change people.

“Well, if it isn’t the X-wing thief,” Poe drawled, walking up to her with a still slightly misty eyed Leia and smiling at her teasingly. He seemed more relaxed now, and she surmised that he had kept most of his animosity for Ben specifically.

“Sorry,” she said with a laugh. “I think it's still on Naboo, if you’d like to retrieve it.”

“We had heard rumors that you went straight to Naboo,” Leia said, brows lifting curiously.

“I did,” Rey admitted. “It was the place Ben chose for us to meet.”

“I thought I recognized the handiwork of a Nabooian seamstress in these gowns,” Leia said, running her hand over the soft sleeve of Rey’s white gown. Much lighter and more casual than the one she had worn to the peace talks that morning, this one was woven through with complex red and green stitching, a garden of blooms trailing over torso and down her arms.

“Ben had a wardrobe designed for me by the queen’s own women,” Rey said proudly.

“It seems you brought one of the queen's women with you when you came here,” Leia said with a small smile. “I thought your young handmaiden looked well trained, but she handled Finn too efficiently a few minutes ago to be anything else.”

“I am soon to be in need of another,” Rey told her. “I am expecting the current one to be engaged any day.”

“Oh? Her husband doesn’t approve of her continuing to be in your service?”

“The chancellor’s wife will have her own duties that will need to be attended to," Rey explained. "She’s already planning the ways that she can help the citizens of Coruscant thrive.”

Leia’s happy smile faded. It seemed she, too, was remembering the Hosnian system. Leia had many friends there, Rey knew, from her time as a senator. For her that loss had been a deeply personal one. “Ah, Chancellor Hux,” she said quietly, her lips pressing into a thin line.

Rey nodded, taking Leia’s arm and walking with her toward a small empty table. She urged her to sit before she continued speaking. “It seems we are all finding love these days,” she said, sitting down in her own chair and trying to steer the conversation back to something more comfortable. “Finn and Rose look lovely. I am so happy for them.”

Beside Leia, Poe scrunched up his face in exaggerated sadness, joining in Rey's attempt to lighten the mood. “I must be the only one not comfortably settled down these days.”

“We’ll find you the right person,” Rey teased. “There are millions of people on Coruscant, surely one or two will catch your eye. Assuming you intend to stay?”

“Is there a job for me?”

“Of course,” Rey said, “if you’d like one. There’s always room for the input of the best pilot in the Resistance. We have some ideas for new flight technology that I think you might be interested in helping develop.”

He perked up at that. “Oh? Well, Kylo does owe me a ship.”

“I’m sure that we can create something that you’ll find quite suitable.”

Poe's response was cut short by a flurry of movement and they all turned to watch as Finn stalked past them, Rose close on his heels. She shrugged apologetically, but it didn’t look like things were going well.

“I’m going to go and help her calm him down,” Poe said quickly. “He’s got the most reason out of all of us to be upset about this. His hate for the First Order…”

“I understand,” Rey said quietly. “Please, do what you can.”

Poe jogged after their friends and Rey hoped fervently that he could at least help convince Finn to give them a real chance to show that things were different now.

"He won't stay angry for long," Leia predicted. "He cares too much about what's best for the people he loves."

"I hope so," Rey said. "I want him to be happy. And Rose. And all of you. It's part of the reason I left, to stop the dying."

"Hmm," Leia said quietly, taking a sip from her own drink. "But not the only reason."

"Not the only reason," Rey agreed. "I was in love with Ben."

"How is that possible?" Leia asked and she listened, nodding along, as Rey explained most of what had happened. She left out the parts about Ben making love to her from across the galaxy but Leia was a smart woman and her gaze was piercing. 

If she didn't know, she certainly suspected.

"That would explain so much," she said when Rey was finished. "I don't know exactly how you are connected, but I have never seen two people this tightly bonded in the Force, not even Luke and I. You and Ben move together, you breathe together, it's almost like you can hear each other's thoughts."

"We can," Rey admitted. "He's as much a part of me as I am part of myself."

"Well, you were certainly able to reach him. Ben was never a happy child, but he's happy when he's with you. I'm glad you were able to turn him away from the dark side," Leia said, glancing at her shrewdly.

"I didn't," Rey began but Leia was looking around curiously at the guards stationed around the garden- they were silent and unobtrusive but the Resistance members still kept their distance, watching them warily.

“Where are your knights?” Leia asked, after taking one last look around expectantly. “Rumor told us that they never stray far from your side. Quite surprising given their apparent loyalty to Kylo for so long.”

“They are on a mission off world,” Rey said vaguely. “They did answer only to Kylo for many years, but they answer to me now, too.”

“They have quite the reputation,” Leia said, soft smile tugging the corners of her mouth. “The dark side, some say.”

Rey laid down her pretense and tapped a finger on the side of her cup, letting her power flow freely through the Force with her irritation. She was beginning to get an idea of what Leia was fishing for. “Indeed,” she acknowledged. "Their abilities are limited but they serve the dark side of the Force."

“Hmm,” Leia hummed, her fingers drumming on the table. “You’ve already been forced to choose a new chancellor. We saw the promotion of the infamous General Hux.”

“Yes," Rey agreed, teeth set as she prepared for them to circle back around to the painful destruction of the Hosnian system. "Chancellor Hux had proven himself quite capable since the unfortunate death of the man who held the position previously.”

“Ah, I’m sure his death so soon after your arrival was terribly stressful," Leia said sympathetically.

“Not as stressful as his life,” Rey told her honestly, flashing her teeth at her mother-in-law, a bit too sharply to be fully polite. “I killed him.”

Leia choked on her drink, eyes wide as they looked at Rey. “You did what?”

“I killed him,” Rey repeated bluntly. “Poisoned him when he tried to have me and Ben assassinated. Is that what you wanted to know? If my bond with Ben banished his darkness or corrupted my light? A bit of both, actually.”

“Rey, you can’t just…”

“Yes, I can,” Rey interrupted. “I am the empress of the known galaxy. I will do what I must to ensure the safety of my family and my people.”

“That is not the Jedi way,” Leia admonished. "I was so hopeful that you had been a good influence on him. Things here were so prosperous."

“Many things were not the Jedi way. Love, passion…You said yourself that you loved Han more than you loved the idea of being a Jedi, and we both know that the Jedi had a big enough hand in their downfall with their dogma and rigid rules," Rey said briskly. "Things here are prosperous. And they are prosperous because I refuse, and your son refuses, to be held down by dogma. We walk no else's line and do what we must, embracing all parts of ourselves."

Leia winced but she did not deny it. “My father was a cruel man, and I cannot condone the use of the dark side of the Force.”

“Anakin Skywalker was many things, but we cannot live in fear of his legacy. Your son was chosen to help keep the balance that Anakin restored. I was chosen to help him.”

“How do you know that?”

“Your father told me,” Rey said quietly, “in his wife’s tomb on Naboo. We met Padme's family. It was lovely.”

“I wish Luke was here to help me make sense of all this,” Leia muttered, pressing her hands to her face. "Today has held many surprises."

“There will be time to discuss Luke another day,” Rey said stiffly. “There is quite a lot that needs to be said and Ben needs to be the one to say it. Once he does, you will understand why he has no love for the Jedi, and why he never returned to you.”

“None of this is what I expected. The galaxy, Coruscant, you- it’s all thriving, despite the use of practices that we believed could only lead to ruin. How could I have misjudged everything, my own son, so badly?”

“There  _ is _ darkness in him,” Rey said. “But there is darkness in all of us. The real test is how we chose to use these parts of ourselves.”


	24. Power and Restoration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The measure of a man is what he does with power- Plato

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This may be a little short and I apologize if it doesn't come together as smoothly as the previous chapters. We experienced a very sudden death in the family yesterday and I am trying to push through on everything to keep my mind busy but I'm not sure how well I'm actually doing at any of it. I was going to give you all a smutty ending to this chapter but I don't think I have it in me to write it right now so I am moving it to the beginning of the next chapter. Thanks for your patience and understanding!

Leia’s disbelief over the success of the new government deepened with each hour that she spent on Coruscant. None of her years of experience had prepared her for how incredibly well-run the Imperial Republic actually was. 

Ben was politely distant and Rey warmly courteous as they showed the Resistance members around the palace and then the further extensions of the large complex that was needed to house and sustain such a massive operation. The old senate chamber and the housing for senators and other officials had been remodeled, along with numerous buildings full of offices and meeting rooms that now had people shuffling in and out of them on various official business.

She listened attentively as Ben explained the processes that they had used when they established the senate branch of his Imperial Republic. Complex rules established divisions for subreview and created deadlines solutions to be reached before problems were subjected to official oversight from higher ranking individuals, eventually reaching the attention of Kylo and Kyra Ren. The final decision on these issues would belong to them, removing the problem of endless bureaucratic tangle that had hobbled the New Republic. In the short time the new government has been in place they had already tackled issues that Leia had never been able get accomplished herself- they had already developed social programs and assigned members to special coalitions to deal with criminal organizations and effectively abolish slavery.

Years of bickering in the senate on Hosnia had resulted in corruption and stagnation but here…here the government was galvanized and energetic. The people were smiling and though they bowed politely whenever Kylo and Kyra Ren swept by, they seemed to hold no true fear.

It was a direct contradiction to what she had been taught, what she had come to believe, about the dark side and its uses. Her connection to the Force, though never the main focus of her life, had nevertheless been enough for Luke to take great care in making sure she knew the dangers and the temptations of using her gift inappropriately. To use the dark, even slightly, could only lead to destruction.

Yet, as she walked the halls of the new world that her son and his bride had created and saw the evidence of their achievements, doubt began to grow inside her and she couldn’t shake the replay of Rey’s words in her mind.

She had been horrified to sit in the lush greenery of the garden and hear Rey speak so casually of murdering the chancellor. The soft blooms on the trees and the warm sunlight on the empress’ gown had been so soothing, so indicative of calm and peace- it was the last thing she had expected to learn and that familiar fear had wrapped itself around her heart.

What if she had made a mistake? What if the dark influence of her son had been enough to tempt Rey into a darkness that would consume them all?

But Rey had been unshakable, sipping her drink and staring at her calmly over the rim of a cup held in perfectly steady hands. Leia could feel the swirl of darkness that ran through the Force when she discussed the chancellor’s fate, but it did not claw at her, seeking to ruin them all. It was controlled, harnessed, and used as a tool to be put away again at will. Rey did not seek it, but neither did she fear it as Leia had been taught to do.

As she had then taught Ben to do.

“Fear is the path to the dark side,” Rey had told her. “And the fear of darkness itself is not an exception. It lives in us, and we must accept that it does and that there will be times when using it is the right thing. If you try to deny it completely, it will grow until it threatens to swallow you and everything you care about.”

“The Jedi had a very different view,” she had said in return. “And they existed peacefully for millennia.”

Rey hummed slightly in disagreement. “I have the ancient Jedi texts from the original temple on Ahch-To. What the Jedi became at the end, all of that fear, it was not the things were in the beginning. It was their downfall, as it was Ben’s.”

Leia had put a hand to her heart, to the steady pulse of pain and regret that she had carried for so many years that she had forgotten what life was like without it. “It’s my fault,” she had said, her eyes flying to Rey’s, expecting to see condemnation.

Instead she was met with steady love and hope. “Perhaps it was, in a way,” Rey had said. “But it was also what was meant to be. If it had not happened, then none of this would have happened and, as I said, we were meant to keep the balance.”

“Fated by the cosmic Force,” Leia had said.

“Exactly,” Rey had said with a smile. “And it is not too late to mend the relationship with Ben. He is less bitter than he used to be, since all of this has happened, and he has become a happy man. Though I do think that you will need to explain to him why you sent him away, why you didn’t come after him.”

Leia walked behind him now, barely cognizant of the destination that the group had decided to visit next, and watched him with tired eyes.

She knew precisely how difficult that conversation would be, how much it would hurt them. She had failed Ben as a mother, and now, as he stopped outside an aircraft hangar to speak to an officer in a stiff unrelenting black uniform, she was struck again by the painful realization that the man that he had become- tall and harsh and imposing- she didn’t know at all.

She had always held him in her heart, but she remembered him as a baby, fat cheeked and round, or a toddler, fast and mischievous with dark curls in his eyes. Sometimes she remembered him as he had been when she left him, lean and long limbed in childhood, eyes wide and dark with rage and hurt and betrayal, but she had always closed the door on those before she could examine them too closely.

The officer standing with Ben pressed the buttons on the door’s keypad security lock and the hangar opened with a hiss of sound, revealing rows of light fighter craft that had Leia’s eyebrows lifting in surprise. No simple TIEs, these were the result of incredible craftsmanship, each design unique and carrying technology that she had never seen before.

Poe turned her attention as he bounded past the rest of them excitedly, sprinting from one to the next and running his hands over the smooth black exteriors.

“These are all original Imperial Republic designs,” Ben said, coming to stand beside Poe and gesturing down the line of fighters. “All designed for different uses, all with carefully crafted technology that makes them ideally suited for their purpose.”

“If we aren’t at war, then what is their purpose?” Finn’s voice was hard, and he stood stiffly beside Rose with his arms crossed over his chest.

“To ensure that the dreadnoughts stationed throughout the galaxy have adequate means of keeping the peace and protecting their sectors,” Rey explained. “The First Order was able to gain control of the galaxy almost without impediment because the New Republic had downscaled their forces and refused to acknowledge a rising threat.”

“I was there,” Ben reminded them. “I saw how easy it was and I know that the First Order’s ships and weapons were built beyond the galaxy we know, in the Unknown Regions, where the Empire fled to regroup and rebuild. I don’t know what else is out there, but I will not leave our people unprepared.”

Finn had no argument for that, and they soon left the hangar, Poe engaged in an animated conversation with Rey and Ben about his possible role in designing and testing more elite fighter craft.

“Mitaka can access the records for you, of all the things we’ve done and the improvements that are scheduled. If you decide to be part of the program, then he will know the right people for you to be in contact with.”

Poe turned to a dark-haired young man that Leia assumed must be Mitaka, who was walking beside them efficiently with his datapad in hand. He never seemed to be far from Ben’s side, apparently always ready to be of service to the emperor.

“Sounds like you’re the man I need to talk to about my future,” Poe said with a smirk and Mitaka, who Rey would later assure her was usually unrufflable in even the most extreme situation, blushed painfully crimson and stammered his way through what must have been an affirmative response, though Leia could understand none of it.

Rey grinned at Poe as Mitaka walked away, looking over his shoulder at Poe and trying briskly to catch up wit Ben, who had walked ahead to speak quietly with Rose. “Well,” Rey said, bumping Poe’s arm good naturedly, “that didn’t take long.”

Poe laughed, but he didn’t deny it, and by the time they arrived at the large building that had been redesigned as a center for the stormtrooper children that could not yet be reunited with their families, the mood was almost relaxed.

Leia had no idea what the original function of the building might have been, but it was soon clear that every possible comfort had been thought of for the children. There were entire floors devoted to living quarters, not just rooms for beds but large playrooms that housed games and toys. There were kitchens staffed by droids that provided regular meals and snacks, and on the lower floors to provide education.

“Who takes care of them?” Rose asked, watching as a small group of young girls walked by, looking at them curiously until a caretaker gently shuffled them along.

“They used to be stormtroopers,” Rey said. “Some of them didn’t want to live that life anymore but couldn’t find their families or didn’t want to leave Coruscant and the friends or lovers they had taken while they were still in the system. We used the information we had on them to retrain them for other tasks that they were well suited for.”

“Like teachers,” Rose said, peeking into the classroom to her right and watching quietly as the instructor pointed to Coruscant on a glittering hologram that turned the room into a large map.

“Among other things,” Rey agreed. “Not all of them are here. There were many jobs that we were able to provide.”

Finn shook his head, his shoulders finally relaxing from the rigid posture that he had kept since his arrival. “I know that teacher,” he said softly. “She was TY-4319.”

“Hmm,” Rey said, peering over his shoulder. “I think she goes by Tayan, now.”

“You kept them alive,” Finn murmured, waving hesitantly when Tayan looked up and smiled at him, a flash of surprised recognition on her face. “Not just the kids, but all of them.”

“And all of you,” Rey reminded him. “No more blood, not from anyone if it can be avoided.”

Ben cleared his throat. “Would you mind taking a bit of a detour with me, Finn? I’ve got a few records here that I think might interest you.”

Finn stood, his body tense, for the expanse of several slow heartbeats before he glanced into the classroom again and followed Ben down the hallway. Rose started to follow, but Rey laid a restraining hand on her arm.

“I think they have a few past hurts to discuss,” she said. “In the meantime, maybe you’d like to see the offices that you would be using if you decided to help us with this place? We keep a lot of data, analyzing what is and isn’t working for the kids and how they are responding to reintegration attempts with their families. We hope that those same strategies can be used to place orphans into loving homes throughout the galaxy.”

Rose glanced after her husband anxiously and Leia stepped forward with a smile. “I’m sure he’ll be alright. There’s been nothing threatening since we arrived.”

They both turned to Rey, seeking her reassurance and she laughed softly. “I’m certain he’ll be fine and, if my guess is correct about what Ben wanted to show him, he should come back a happy man.”

Rey’s prediction came true not long after, when she was still showing Rose the set of offices that would be hers and Finn’s if they stayed to help with the program. The rooms were spacious, the view expansive as it looked out over the city.

“And, of course,” Rey said, “you’ll have plenty of time to take off after the baby comes.”

Everyone in the room turned to look when Ben strode back into the room with Finn close behind, gripping a datapad tightly and looking around anxiously until he spotted Rose. He rushed across the room toward her and Leia’s eyes shifted quickly to Ben as he moved to Rey’s side and pressed a quick kiss to her temple, his fingers lacing with hers as though he was grounding himself in her presence after even such a short absence.

They both smiled happily as Finn swept Rose into a tight embrace. “He found the records of my parents,” Finn said, pulling away to cup Rose’ face in his hands. “I know who my parents are.”

Rose squealed excitedly and leaned up on her toes to press a congratulatory kiss to her husband’s cheek, pulling him in for another hug and laughing as he swung her around in a circle, toes barely touching the ground.

Leia crossed the room to stand beside Ben, unnoticed as all eyes remained on the scene that was unfolding. “That was nice of you,” she told him, looking up at him and taking in the long face and proud nose that reminded her so much of his father.

“I owed it to him,” Ben said stiffly. “And an apology for what happened on Starkiller Base.”

“Did you give him the apology, as well?”

Ben nodded and though his expression remained impassive his emotions were a tumult in the Force that she couldn’t quite figure out.

Nothing here had been as she expected it to be- a mixture of lightness and dark that was perplexing and left her feeling surprised at each turn.

“I’m glad,” she said finally. “It would be wonderful to see peace between you and he would be a great asset to you here.”

“He’s agreed to stay here as his permanent residence, though he does want to take some time after the baby comes to meet his birth family.”

“That will be a lovely thing for him,” Leia said, turning to find that Rose was now pulling Finn by the hand to show him all of the spaces that they would use as they settled into their new roles on Coruscant.

“Our family on Naboo would like to meet you,” Ben said, and Leia’s eyes flew back to his, her teeth coming together with a loud and jarring  _ clack. _

“What?”

“We met Padme’s family while we were on Naboo,” he said patiently. “They wanted to meet you.”

Leia swallowed and looked down. “I didn’t realize that she had family that would be interested in meeting us.”

“They were very welcoming,” he reassured. “Whatever anger they felt toward Anakin did not extend to Padme’s children or grandchildren.”

“I had parents,” Leia said. “I don’t know how to be Padme’s daughter and certainly not Darth Vader’s.” The chill that ran through her was bone deep, as was the shame. She had never been sure if it was fear of Vader’s legacy or fear of feeling like a traitor to the family that had raised her that kept her from what little remained of her birth family, but she  _ was _ sure that the thought of it had always left her cold and uncertain.

“You can be an Organa and a Nabarrie,” Ben said. “I have learned to be more than a legacy, more than the sum of my parts. Being one thing does not prevent you from being the other.”

Leia bit her lip and nodded slowly. “I’ll think about it,” she promised, and she wondered as they left the center behind them, how her son had become so wise.

***

The old senate chamber had been restored and each of the small pods that once again lined the walls had been cleaned and repaired.

Ben felt, as much as he heard, the sudden hush that fell over the room when he entered. Rey was at his side, her hand tucked into the crook of his arm as they crossed the floor to take their places in the largest pod at the center of the room. There were two seats in the front, elevated and slightly larger than the others, that would serve as their thrones during senate proceedings but there were several other seats in their pod. Leia would be attending this meeting, as well as Chancellor Hux, Mitaka and Edelphi.

This was the first official meeting of the newly revived senate, and everyone was tense as the pod rose gracefully into the air. The galaxy had placed all of their collective hope in this moment, and now that it had finally arrived the atmosphere was one of terrified anticipation.

Ben waited until the pod reached its full height and then held up his hands, waiting patiently for silence to descend over the room.

“Welcome, to the first meeting of the senate. All of you, during your time on Coruscant as delegates and representatives of your systems, have helped us to reach this historic day.” He turned, taking in the faces that started down at him from all sides. “You have helped to shape the policies of our government, helped to shape the framework in which we will make decisions and move forward together. This moment is an achievement that deserves to be celebrated. Congratulations to you all!”

The applause was thunderous, and he let them cheer for several minutes before he again held up his hands to request silence. The months of effort that they had put in to get here had been exhaustive and they deserved to enjoy the fruits of that labor.

“Now,” he said, as they finally grew quiet again. “We have further work to do.”

He sat beside Rey, her hand on his, as the first minor issues were brought to the floor for debate. Most of it was expected, rules that had already been discussed and agreed to previously that simply needed official approval. Each was approved quickly and effectively, bolstering the mood as confidence increased.

The last item on the agenda was one that he had hoped would be avoided and he had to fight to keep his face a careful blank as the senators he had dealt with at Hux’s request both requested to have their grievance over trade routes brought to the attention of the emperor himself.

He nodded tersely and their pods moved into position in front of him, the senators both looking quite pleased that they had been given permission to force their conflict all the way to the throne for consideration.

“Thank you, Emperor, for your willingness to hear this dispute,” the one to Ben’s left said, his voice a high pitched whine as he bent his body, long limbed and slender, folding into a semblance of a bow.

Ben didn’t respond, turning his gaze to the other senator, an amphibious looking being with large eyes whose greeting was relayed through a translator.

“You come before the senate to seek resolution to a trade dispute,” he said calmly. “What prevents you from resolving this dispute yourselves?”

“We had the route first,” exclaimed the tall one. “It was given to us under the Empire!”

“The Empire,” the other scoffed, the translator doing a surprisingly decent job of conveying the depth of the senator’s disgust.

“They were efficient!”

“They were cruel, and the route was given to us under the new Republic because we had the courage to fight back!”

Ben sighed, his mother’s words filtering through the noise of the argument to confirm his suspicions.

“They will not settle this matter between themselves,” she whispered to Rey, leaning close to keep the words from being overheard by the senators.

“You know them?” Rey whispered back, and Ben glanced over to find both of them watching the tall senator as he waved his many arms around, gesturing emphatically.

“Not them specifically, I believe the previous senators died in the Hosnian system massacre, but their systems are notorious for bickering. We spent years trying to soothe relations between them, but with very little success. This will take months to sort out.”

Ben could feel Rey’s amusement and when he glanced at her again, there was a small smile on her face. She placed her hand on Leia’s and said quietly, “Just watch.”

Ben listened to the rest of the short argument, giving his attention to both sides and keeping his gaze impassive as each of the senators took their turn explaining their position. Voices rose as each cut into the other’s story with increasingly vicious interruptions. He felt the eyes of the entire chamber as they burned into him, waiting to see what he would do.

This is where the previous senates, of the Republics both Old and New, had failed them. Without the strength of leadership to resolve conflicts, they had been left at the mercy of months of bureaucracy in situations like this.

He could feel Leia’s eyes on him, stronger than the rest. Her energy in the Force was exactly as he remembered it- heavy with concern and laced with fear. If he did not take action the senate would lose the perilous faith that he had spent months building, but if he reacted too strongly or his judgment was too harsh...he didn't know what his mother might do. Rey's confidence that Leia would learn to accept the darkness inside him suddenly wasn't enough to soothe his own fears and the years of expectation, of failure, settle over him as the chamber waited for him to act.

He reached through the Force, his mind instinctively seeking the one thing that he knew could center his thoughts, could calm his turbulent emotions, and found Rey’s presence beside him. She was a beacon of surety, none of his own doubts, or his mother’s, could bleed into her emotions. 

_ You can do this _

Rey’s voice in his mind settled him, breathing calm into him with her faith.

_ You are not ruled by darkness, but the galaxy needs for you not to be ruled by fear or weakness _

_ Protect what is yours _

_ Do what is best for our people _

He knew she wouldn’t step in- not just because she trusted him, though he knew she did, but because he needed to be the one to do this. She had been the representation of the people, their champion as they learned to love her, as they learned to trust him by watching the way that  _ he _ loved her, but he began to understand now that her role had not been the only one that had drawn the galaxy together.

He had become the representation of power, of strength, of the ability of the new government to set and achieve goals, to protect the most vulnerable of its citizens.

As the last words of the senators faded away, Ben looked down at the holopad in his hands, the map showing the trade route in question, and flicked the screen back and back to see the years of adjustments that had taken place, each more convoluted and confusing than the last. These two systems had millennia of history, all of it contentious.

He waved a hand at the mediator that lingered anxiously behind one of the feuding politicians, beaconing her forward. A young Togruta woman now named Kataa with pale blue skin, she was a familiar face. She had once been a stormtrooper, one of the ones that had chosen to leave the program but who had not been able to find a family to go back to. Hux had identified her through her psychological profile as empathetic and eloquent at communication- now she was the best mediator they had.

“How did they respond to mediation attempts after I ordered them to work out this issue?”

She shook her head and shrugged miserably. “They were not interested in finding a peaceful resolution to the problem. Both sides wanted full control and would hear nothing of compromise.”

He nodded and gave the woman a small smile. “Thank you, Kataa. Your excellent services will no longer be wasted on these two.”

He didn’t miss the look of relief on her face as she turned away, or the muttered “good luck” that she shot the senators under her breath as she passed them.

They ignored her, but they had the sense to step back slightly as he pinned them with his gaze. “Thank you both for bringing this to my attention,” he said, lifting the holopad and the map high enough for them to see it. “There is a history of inefficiency that goes back so far into the Old Republic that the records of its beginnings have been lost to time. Alliances made and trade routes given based on favoritism and mutual back scratching instead of pragmatism or what is best for the citizens of the galaxy.”

Their placating smiles faded as he spoke, and a deepening silence settled over the chamber.

“All trade routes will be reevaluated,” he said, turning his face away from the two openmouthed senators in front of him and raising his voice so that his words carried easily to the entire assembly. “Each sector will be assessed by a team of experts to optimize trade and transportation.”

“You can’t do that!” Two voices spoke as one, their animosity forgotten as they united in alarm over the prospect of losing their favored positions in the galaxy.

The outbursts were barely audible over the cheers and exclamations of the crowd but when he turned his gaze back to the speakers the senators cowered before his silent condemnation.

“These routes have food and materials being shipped to planets three times further away than necessary, while planets much closer have to send supplies to the outer rim. It’s expensive and it’s wasteful. It takes food out of the mouths of poor farmers so that high ranking delegates and politicians can have the satisfaction of claiming they have closer ties to the government. You take food from the mouths of my people.”

They all had the decency to look chastised, but he sensed their anger as they bowed their heads in deference.

“You are lucky that reevaluating the trade routes is all that I have decided to do here,” he continued. “Pray I do not alter the agreements further. I promised you fairness and competent leadership. If you don’t like the broad strokes that are handed down by the crown, I suggest you learn to mediate your affairs before they reach this level of attention.”

They looked at Rey, appealing to what they assumed was her softer nature.

“I grew up on Jakku,” she reminded them with a sharp smile. “One of the planets most harshly affected by the inefficiencies of the senate. You will find no sympathy from me.”

They bowed and slunk away without further questioning, glancing around them at the uproarious noise of approval from the rest of the assembly. It was clear that they would get no sympathy there, either.

Leia’s shocked pride rippled through the Force and Ben listened while pretending not to as Rey’s whispered words, an answer to some question of his mother’s that he must have missed, snuck through the shouts of the senate room to reach him.

“He is everything that the galaxy needs him to be. They love me and they will follow me happily, but  _ him _ … they fear him, they respect him, they look to him to solve the difficult problems. He has the ability to charm or frighten as the situation calls for it. He is every bit the son of Han Solo and Leia Organa, every bit the grandson of Anakin Skywalker and Padme Amidala. When he is not afraid of what he is, he’s  _ everything _ \- the best of each of you.”

“I feared too much,” Leia admitted.

“What the Jedi and the Sith did to you, to the galaxy, it has to stop,” Rey insisted firmly. “We will not allow their rules to set us up to fight ourselves or each other anymore.”

Leia nodded, wiping tears from her cheeks as he turned to face her.

“Would you like to see the temple?”

***

Ben had been at the temple with Rey nearly every day as they tried to find ways to incorporate the teachings of both sides into their practices. Now that the Resistance had come to stay on Coruscant and the senate was settling into a routine that had the galaxy feeling prosperous and peaceful, they had more time to devote to their skills in the Force and the revitalization of the temple.

Leia had been overwhelmed the first time she had come, the echoes of the violence that had happened had not yet been fully erased, but she, too, now came often to sit in meditation and watch as they sparred or as Rey worked on her lightsaber.

They had still not spoken about any of the issues of their past- neither of them spoke of events prior to her arrival on the planet- but the peace between them stretched into days and then weeks and a new light sort of bond formed.

He did not believe that it could exist this way between them forever, but he had hope that it would make dealing with the past easier when the time did come when they could no longer avoid it. Newer, more pleasant memories might serve to blunt the pain that they had both lived through.

It was clear, as she leaned down and admired the purple beauty of Rey’s kyber crystal, that she had a deep fondness for his wife and that alone had done much to soften his heart to her.

“You’re nearly finished with it now,” Leia said proudly, admiring the wiring inside the saber that Rey was working on. “Though, I do wish you had been able to make a staff instead. Your sparring is beautiful with the saber, but you move more naturally with your saber in your hand.”

Rey nodded sadly. “I know. We are looking for another planet that is rich in kyber but the Empire stripped most of it and we haven’t had any luck so far.”

“Don’t give up,” Leia said with a smile. “I’m going to go. I want to stop and check on Rose before I go to my meeting. Kataa is a truly gifted mediator but she’s asked for me to sit with her this afternoon as she tries to encourage a few of the Outer Rim planets to comply with the new regulations on spice transportation.”

She kissed Rey’s cheek and then his before sweeping out of the room with a wave.

“She’s happy here,” Rey observed, and he nodded.

“They all are, I think.”

“Rose certainly is, and Finn and Poe have been so busy settling into their new jobs that they barely have time to even see me, so I agree.”

“How’s Chewie?”

“He loves us, but this isn’t really the adventurous life he’s used to. Leia said he was taking some time to go home, visit his family, try to decide what he wants to do now that the war is really over and he doesn’t have smuggling to fall back on.”

“I wonder if he’d be willing to put that experience to good use and help the Outer Rim sectors get a handle on the slave smuggling industry that’s sprang up there.”

“We’re gaining ground, but not quickly enough. That’s a great idea and I’ll have Leia reach out to him about it.” She tipped up her chin and he pressed a kiss to her mouth, lingering over the soft feel and warm welcome.

She shifted back with a grin, a restraining hand on his chest. “We are supposed to be practicing,” she reminded him, and he huffed in exaggerated irritation.

“We have been practicing. I have the new sparring scars to prove it.”

“Me, too, but I guess you should have been faster that time.”

“And you should have been stronger,” he said, running his thumb over the glancing burn he had left on the curve of her shoulder the day before during their sparring lesson.

“I expected us to be better at healing by now,” she said, turning to look ruefully at her arm.

“So did I,” he agreed, picking up the Jedi text that lay on the table beside her. “I don’t know what we are doing wrong. We’ve mastered everything else we’ve tried.”

Rey smiled and let blue lightning dance across the tips of her fingers. “Your advice on the darker aspects of the force certainly helped.”

He sat down beside her and ran his fingers over the page of ancient text. “Maybe that’s the problem,” he muttered.

“What?”

“We’ve been trying to use the light to heal, because it seemed like the obvious thing and the instructions are in the Jedi texts, but what if that isn’t enough?”

“I don’t understand.”

“The dark side is about protecting what’s yours, about keeping it and holding it. The Jedi never practiced that- their philosophy was to let things go and never practice attachment. Maybe the reason they stopped healing was because you need to pull on the dark side of the Force.”

“Healing is selfless,” Rey said, her mouth twisting doubtfully. “The instructions require the healer to give away part of their own essence.”

“Yes, but the goal is selfish. It’s to keep the other person here, to prevent them from joining the Force in death.” He looked around, eyes finally settling on the broken crystal inside Anakin’s saber, still resting in the place they had put it on its stand. “Let me try something.”

She was watching him curiously when he returned with the crystal in his hand. “Why don’t you just practice on me?”

“If this goes wrong, I don’t want it to hurt you,” he explained.

She was quiet as he settled down with the broken crystal gripped tight in his hand, his mind focused intently on the edges where the split had occurred, tearing it apart and leaving the energy within to weep at its pain.

He poured his desire into it, the love and happiness that he felt and the need he had to make it whole, to make it usable. The light swirled inside him, pulsing into the crystal, but with it a thin vein of dark possession, of the attachment that Jedi were forbidden to experience.

He opened his hand and the ragged broken edges of the crystal had smoothed, creating two small but perfectly healed crystals.

“They’re white,” Rey said, surprised.

“I didn’t expect that,” he agreed. “But mine did change from blue to red when I bled it. Maybe this works in the opposite way.”

“Did you have to pull from the light to bleed it?”

“In a way,” he acknowledged. “It shattered my connection to the things I loved, so I did have to access that small thread of whatever positive emotion I still had.”

“It’s interesting that the process for hurting the crystal and healing it are inverse of each other. There are so many layers to balance. Let’s try another crystal.”

“We don’t have another crystal.”

She smiled sweetly and eyed the saber on his hip while patting the one on her own belt. “We actually have two.”

He hadn’t denied her anything, not since she had come to him on Naboo and put her faith in the man that she believed he could become, but this was the hardest thing that she had ever wanted him to do. The last time he had poured his energy into this crystal, his pain had been enough to make it bleed, to make it crack and shatter in his hand until it was as broken and destructive as he was.

She was asking him now to try and undo what had been done, to trust in himself that he had the ability to fix something that had been so intimately violated by his own hand. Fixing Anakin’s crystal had been easier, that they had damaged together, and despite what he had told her that night in the snowy forest of Starkiller Base, that lightsaber had never really belonged to him as his own had done.

His fingers trembled as he placed his saber on the table and carefully began to open the casing. Rey was beside him, her attention focused on dismantling the borrowed saber he had given her, on finding the red and bleeding crystal within it. Someone else had damaged it, but he had no doubt that she could fix it.

His wife seemed to have a unique talent for finding and fixing broken things.

They sat on the floor, cross-legged and facing each other, when they had each retrieved their crystal. She had gotten much better at her meditation since they had arrived here, but it still took several long minutes before the scattered pattern of her thoughts dimmed to a calm blank in his mind. He could feel the effort as she struggled to focus her concentration, the slight tremble in her muscles sent a vibration through the Force that he could feel in his bones.

He pulled his own thoughts inward, directing them toward the crystal he held cradled in his palm. It was different from the other one, as he had suspected that it would be, and the simple balance of energy that had soothed the ragged edges of Anakin’s kyber was not as easy to find as the memories that he had used to bleed his crystal poured back into his mind.

He clamped his teeth together as the pain of his parents leaving him erupted inside him like it was a fresh wound. The rage he had felt when he opened his eyes to find Luke standing over him with a lit saber, when the others from the Jedi academy had not believed him, chased a path of dark energy under his skin. The tortured and conflicted feelings he had buried with his memories of losing Tai, of killing Voe, only fanned the flames until he could feel it again- the light inside him being consumed by the hungry dark as it fed on his trauma.

“Ben,” he felt her, more than heard her, when she said his name. Her fingers were cool and unafraid on his cheek. “Come back to me,” she said, reaching for his mind with own, trailing the connection of the bond that nothing could sever.

He followed the path that she had lit, a shimmering beacon of illumination that was made of her hope and her love, until he found his way back from the frightened boy he had been to the man that he had become- someone who was not afraid, who had hope of his own. He knew that as long as he was with her, he was on the right path.

Love flowed between them, unashamed and aching vulnerable, a balm on all that had been, and when he opened his eyes, she was there waiting for him. In his hand, rested another white crystal, no longer broken and no longer bleeding.

“I did it,” he said, closing his hand around the crystal and letting the peaceful energy seep into his skin and settle his raw emotions.

“Me, too,” she said, holding up a hand and showing him the crystal that she had healed. Not white, as his was, but the same deep purple as the one he had given her as a gift on their wedding day.

“It matches,” he said quietly. He should have been surprised, but he wasn’t. He had known when he had given her the borrowed saber that it was hers as much as it had ever been anyone else’s.

He cupped her face in his hand, running his eyes over the familiar lines and the freckles that he was certain he could map with more certainty than any star chart he had ever been forced to memorize. “Are you okay?”

She nodded, turning her head to press a kiss to his palm. “The memories that bled the crystal were not my own. It was painful, but not the same as what you experienced.”

He sighed gratefully and gripped her hand. “Now you can make your staff.”

“I think I can use the parts from the new saber and the borrowed one. Combining them shouldn’t be difficult and it won’t take long. What about your saber? Will it still need to vent if the saber isn’t cracked?”

He frowned and looked at the crystal in his hand. “No, I’ll have to do some redesigning but…”

“But?”

He swallowed. “What if I used the smaller pieces from Anakin’s saber? To keep the cross-guard design?”

She pressed a finger to her lip, considering the design as he spoke. “Each smaller crystal would power one the cross sections…That would work  _ and _ be a better use of the crystal than leaving it in here. There’s precious little of it in the galaxy, so maybe we shouldn’t waste it.”

"You don't mind me taking it out of the temple?'

She shook her head. "I think I might have before, but the things its done- the children it hurt- that's all been cleansed away." She kissed him and settled into his lap, wrapping her arms tight around his middle and resting her head on his chest. "We can give that crystal a fresh start, just like the rest of the galaxy."

He reached for her arm, the tender burn that still marked the skin there, and gave her a small push of his energy that let smooth skin grow to cover the wound like it never existed. "It's like the damage never happened at all."

She peered down at her arm and smiled. 


	25. What Might Have Been

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path- Buddha

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After this we only have ten chapters left in my outline. We are firmly into the third and final part of the story and I can't begin to express how excited I am to have finally made it this far. It's taken a long time to get here but we are finally actually moving toward the end now. Thank you all so much for reading and commenting on this fic as I worked on it. I am so grateful for each of you.
> 
> *I think this is the shortest chapter I have posted for this fic, but it was the logical stopping point in the action so please forgive me. There are major things coming up in the next chapter and I did not want to have to cut it off in a weird place or have a huge chapter that was difficult to read.

Rey watched with quiet interest as her husband stripped off his cape and then his boots. It was her favorite part of the day, the evening when they returned to their private quarters and had time alone to simply be themselves. The guards all had extremely strict instructions not to interrupt them unless it was an emergency, so they were rarely disturbed after the heavy doors closed behind them.

“How did your afternoon meeting go at the children’s center?” he asked as he tugged the black tunic over his head, letting it land on the back of the nearest chair for a droid to come and take it away for cleaning.

“Very well,” she said, her eyes watching the ripple of muscle in his back as he moved around the large room. “Rose was an excellent choice for that job and has already made so many helpful suggestions. She should be having her baby any day, though, so we had to make sure everything would be handled in her absence.”

Ben smiled. “Finn has been so excited he’s even been happy to see me lately. If he calls me Solo one more time, though…”

Rey laughed, unable to imagine anyone but Finn being brave enough to do something like that. “Does he really?”

“Only when there’s no one else around,” Ben said with a shake of his head. “I think he does it just to get a reaction out of me.”

“I’m sure he does,” Rey agreed. “It’s good to see you two getting along so well.”

“Everyone has settled in so well here,” he said with an edge of surprise still in his voice. “I really couldn’t even bring myself to hope for something like this before they arrived. My mother is happy, and she doesn’t look at me with fear in her eyes anymore.”

“No, she doesn’t,” Rey said, wiping the tears from her cheeks. “Have you talked to her about Luke and what happened?”

“Not yet,” he admitted. “I know I will probably have to someday but for now…”

“For now, you’re just enjoying that she’s here.”

“I never thought it would be possible after everything that happened. I don’t want to ruin it and I know how close she was to Luke.”

He sat down on the bed beside her, his hand resting comfortably in the curve of her thigh, and she placed her own over it, lacing their fingers together and squeezing softly. She could feel his hesitation, the small undercurrent of fear that discussing Luke would cause his fragile bond with his mother to fall apart faster than a house made of cards from one of the gambling games his father used to play.

“It’ll be okay,” she promised. “Whenever you  _ are  _ ready to talk to her, it will work out. Everything else has so I have to believe this will, too.”

“I know,” he said. “We’ve built something worth having and I don’t think anything could really tear it down now.”

She knew how much he wanted to believe that, but she also felt the small glimmer of doubt in his words. He had been very protective her since the assassination attempt and, when no evidence could be discovered on Coruscant, he had sent the Knights of Ren out into the galaxy to trace down any leads that they could find.

So far, they had uncovered nothing and every day without an answer to that mystery was one that Ben feared for her life. It cast a shadow of uncertainty over their future no matter how well things went with the senate or his mother.

She curled into his lap, seeking to both receive comfort and give it, and pressed a kiss to his jaw where the muscle always worked just beneath the skin when he was irritated or worried. She had the bond to tell her how he felt but most of the time she thought she didn’t really need it. He wore his emotions in his eyes and the way he held his face. She would have been able to spot the subtle changes in his mood based on those things alone.

“If there’s anything to be worried about,” she said, “we’ll handle it when it comes. Anakin made it clear that we were chosen, destined to do this.”

“Well, it’s not like he was ever wrong about anything before,” Ben teased, but some of his worry eased away and she pulled him down to press her mouth to his and help him forget the rest of it.

***

The sun was setting over the city through the wide palace windows when the Knights of Ren returned to Coruscant.

No words needed to be spoken as they walked briskly through the building, both Rey and Ben could feel the urgency that twisted its way through the Force like unseen hands shoving them along with soundless whispers.

_ This way _

_ Hurry _

_ There’s danger  _

_ Hurry _

They went directly to the throne room, dark and empty now that all of the business had been handled for the day, with the emperor and his empress both arriving only moments later.

“You found something,” Ben said immediately, and Rey knew he wasn’t asking a question. They could feel the knowledge simmer under the surface of the Knight’s minds as they stood before them, dirty and travel weary and unwilling to so much as stop by their rooms to change into clean clothes.

“Only rumor,” said Ap’lek, “nothing more but…”

“It’s not good,” Cardo cut in bluntly. “If it’s true, it would be a threat to everything you’ve built here.”

“What is it?” Rey asked, her hand tightening on Ben’s arm. Alarm raced down her spine and she pushed down on it, used it to steel herself for whatever was to come.

“Something dark, something that was connected to the old Empire. We couldn’t trace it to a source, but there were enough whispers for us to know that the First Order wasn’t the only thing that sprang up from those ashes.” Vicrul shrugged, apparently uncertain of anything more but sensing the threat nonetheless. 

“Whatever it was, it wasn’t connected to the First Order?” Ben’s tone was speculative, trying to put all the pieces of the puzzle together.

“We don’t know,” Kuruk admitted. “Rumors of darkness are always hard to follow. There were always whispers in the Outer Rim and most people attributed those whispers to the First Order’s activities but now…”

“Now the First Order has become a stable government and there are still whispers of something dark and unnatural,” Ushar finished. “It may have been using the First Order as a screen or it may be something that Snoke was hiding.”

“Either way, it seems to be connected to the assassination attempt on the Empress,” Vicrul said, looking at Rey from behind his helmet.

“Then it will be destroyed,” Ben said simply. “Whatever or whoever it is.”

“I agree,” Rey said. There was too much at stake to hesitate now- whatever this was, the entire galaxy was now depending on them to handle it quickly and efficiently. “And we need to keep this quiet- we don’t want to frighten anyone.”

Ben grunted skeptically. “That route didn’t work out so well for the Republic. We’ll keep it quiet until we know we’re what we’re dealing with but if there is a legitimate threat, we have to make sure everyone is prepared to face it.”

Rey nodded, remembering now how the Republic’s refusal to acknowledge that the First Order was a threat had helped them move nearly unchallenged into new territory until it was too late. Better to have people frightened but taking action than have a calm galaxy sitting idly by as the threat crept ever closer. 

“That’s a good point,” she conceded. “We don’t want to repeat their mistakes. So, the first step is to find out exactly what we’re dealing with. How do we find the source of these rumors?”

“You said it had ties to the old Empire?” Ben asked, looking around at the Knights for confirmation, until they all nodded. “Then we start with the places that Vader and Sidious kept their secrets.”

“And where was that?” Rey asked. “Here?”

“No, once he had control of the government the emperor spent very little time here. He spent most of his time on the Death Stars, but since they were both destroyed, that would have been lost. Vader, though…he kept a permanent residence on Mustafar.”

“Then we’ll go to Mustafar,” Rey said, taking a deep breath to steady her nerves. “Just the eight of us and as quickly as we can. Chancellor Hux can handle things here while we’re gone.”

“We can’t take the command shuttle, or everyone will know we’ve left,” Ben began but Rey smiled up at him, an idea forming quickly in her mind. 

“Do you think your mom will let us borrow the Falcon?”

***

The Millennium Falcon was one place in the galaxy that Ben had been convinced he would never see again. He had stepped on board briefly when his father crashed the old freighter on the frozen surface of Starkiller Base as he searched for his elusive presence in the Force.

He had been angry then, filled with bitter hate and the determination to snuff out the last remaining light inside him by severing his connection to his family with blood and violence.

Now, settled stiffly into the pilot’s seat beside an excited Rey, he felt only sadness and regret. If things had been different, he would have had more good memories here and fewer of the ones that made his heart ache.

“I can’t believe it was so easy to convince her to let us take it,” Rey said, flipping switches and pressing buttons as she prepped the Falcon for takeoff. She clearly knew the instrument panel well, and waves of comfort and familiarity radiated out of her, a stark contrast to his own fumbling efforts as he tried to remember the location of each button and dial. 

“Especially since we didn’t tell her exactly where we were going.” Ben shook his head in bewilderment. “And I can’t believe this piece of junk still flies.”

“Hey,” Rey said, patting the panel fondly. “This thing has saved my life, you know.”

He winced at the memory of his own command to have the ship destroyed during the Battle of Crait. “I know.”

She smiled and leaned over to kiss his cheek. “Don’t make that face, okay? It was a long time ago,”

He snorted. “So that makes it alright? I almost killed you.”

“Yes, and it was very upsetting, but I love you and I would not change the past, Ben. Not even that part of it. I have everything I could ever want.”

“And what is that?”

Her smile widened, radiant and happy as the ship finally made the leap into hyperspace. “Just you. That’s all I need.”

He chuckled, “You always say that.”

“It’s always true,” she said seriously. “I always want you.”

“Hmmm, always?”

“Always,” she confirmed, her eyes already lingering on his lips. 

He grinned and reached across the short distance between their seats, hooking his hands under her thighs and hauling into his lap as she gave a small squeak of surprise.

She tried to stifle a laugh- her face pressed into his neck as her shoulders shook with silent mirth. “Ben, be serious. We can’t actually do this right now, not here.”

He nibbled on the soft skin below her jaw and she tipped her head back to give him better access. “Oh? Why not?” he asked.

“This is..it’s…uh…” she stammered. “It’s the Falcon and… the Knights…they’re in the main hold, probably playing Dejarik or something.” She moaned softly and swallowed hard as his lips traveled down her throat. “They might hear us.”

He pulled back to look at her in amusement, his fingers tracing a path down her spine over the black tunic that she was wearing. “Weren’t you on the Falcon with my mother and everyone else the first time that we…”

“Yes,” she said quickly, “but that was different, wasn’t it? You weren’t really here.”

He nipped her bottom lip, then soothed the sting with his tongue. “It felt pretty real to me.”

“I was afraid they were going to hear us then, too,” she said, sliding her fingers into his hair and giving it a gentle tug. “That would have been so hard to explain.”

“Much easier now that we’re married,” he said, tugging at the belt at her waist until he could set it, and the saber that was hooked to it, on the floor beside his seat. It was easy then to press up beneath the soft fabric that covered her and glide over the firm skin of her stomach and the soft mounds of her breasts.

Her hesitation melted, the Knights and their potentially delicate sensibilities forgotten, and she pressed into his hands, her hips shifting to bring her closer to him as her pleasure and arousal spiked through the bond.

He hooked his fingers under the hem of her tunic and lifted it over her head, his lips twitching in amusement when she arched her back and offered herself eagerly to his mouth. She had always been enthusiastic about having his hands on her but lately it seemed that she was greedier than ever, seeking him out in the morning before they rose for the day and again at night before they slept.

It surprised him that once she had made up her mind that it was the risk of being overheard, she was needy and almost desperate, as she had been in the early days when they didn’t know how long it might be before the bond brought them back together.

He didn’t know what had caused the sudden change but suspected it might be that putting to bed the last of the tension with the Resistance had let her finally relax. Maybe not having that lingering threat that something would go wrong and her friends would be hurt had eased some of her stress and she was simply soaking up pleasure whenever she was able.

He ran his tongue across the tip of one nipple, the bud already hard and sensitive, and she cried out softly, begging for more as she rocked her body against him, grinding the heat of her core against the hard length of him through his trousers and the thin, supple material of her leggings.

“Ben,” she whined, twining her arms around him, and slanting her mouth over his. Her tongue was hot and insistent, unusually demanding as she ran her hands over him before finally setting to work tugging at his belt. She made satisfied noise when she was able to undo it, and another, this one an urgent exhalation of need, when she worked him free and was able to wrap her fingers around him tightly.

His own hips shifted aggressively forward, thrusting up into her grip as she returned her mouth to his, her teeth scraping carelessly over his tongue and nipping at his lips until he was sure he’d wear the marks of them in his skin.

“Take off your boots,” he urged, watching her heatedly as she stood up long enough to kick off her shoes and push her leggings down over her hips. Her eyes were dark in the dim interior of the cockpit, lit in flashes by the passing of stars rushing by the viewport as they slipped through the galaxy at light speed.

It was beautiful, the sight of her surrounded by the universe he’d given her, and it gave him an idea. He held out a hand until she grasped it firmly in her own and then tugged her back toward him, using her momentum to give her a little spin until she landed on his thigh facing the viewport, her back resting against his chest. She opened her mouth, protest ready, but he hushed her and bit down her earlobe just hard enough to silence her as his hands began to roam over her freely.

“Look at all of this,” he murmured in her ear. “All of this belongs to us.” A shudder ran through her as she watched the galaxy fly by and he cupped her breasts, rubbed sensuous circles on the skin of her stomach, before sliding his hands around to cup her thighs and nudge them apart until her legs were open wide and draped over his own thighs.

He curled his fingers through her wetness, a smooth glide on her arousal that made his body throb with the need to be inside her. He pushed it down, focused his attention on caressing the small bud of sensitive nerves until she was weak and trembling in his arms, her breath coming in short pants against his neck as she circled her hips to the tempo of his stroking fingers.

She was still shuddering from the first peak, the echoes of her pleasure still surging through the bond, when he lifted her just enough to align himself with her entrance and then lower her down slowly until he was fully sheathed inside her. She took him greedily, her muscles still fluttering and quivering, and she began to move over him immediately, the fading aftershocks not enough to satiate her.

The blur of stars shone around her as she placed both palms on the instrument panel in front of her and hooked her feet around his calves to give herself better leverage as she rose and fell in a hectic rhythm. He gripped the curve of her hip with hand and tangled his fingers in her hair with the other, helping to lift and guide her as he thrust roughly up into her.

Her cries echoed in the small space with each lewd slap of his flesh against hers and he knew that even if by some small miracle the Knights couldn’t hear them with the cockpit door closed that they would be able to feel the ripple of disturbance in the Force. He decided as she came apart around him and pulled him into his own release that if they said a word to her about it and embarrassed her, he’d rip their heads off their shoulders himself.

***

Mustafar was a miserable planet, the ground beneath his feet so hot it threatened to melt its way through the thick soles of his boots.

The Knights, having wisely said nothing about anything they had sensed during the journey, disappeared quickly over the sparsely treed landscape, moving ahead and looking for signs of anything useful or unusual and leaving their emperor and empress to search the path that led up the slope of the hill to the outline of Vader’s collapsed castle themselves. A jagged outcropping of ragged stone silhouetted against a red sky was all that remained of it. It didn’t look like a promising place for secrets, but it was all that they had for the moment.

“Anakin lived here when he was Darth Vader?” Rey heaved a heavy sigh beside him, beads of sweat sliding down the side of her face and hair sticking damply to the back of her neck beneath her heavy braided bun. “Isn’t this where…you know?”

Ben nodded. “I think the rumor among the few who knew what happened was that he built his castle in nearly the exact spot where Obi-Wan left him to die.”

She frowned and shuddered and for a moment he thought he saw tears glimmer in her eyes before she blinked them away. “How awful, but I suppose if you were trying to draw on nothing but hate and anger to fuel your power, the place of your worst memories would be ideal.”

Her emotions skimmed just beneath the surface, horror and sadness at the history of this place she was pushing against as it fought to overwhelm her. He settled a hand comfortingly at her waist, giving her a little boost of his own happier emotions until she was able to breathe through it and the feeling passed but he couldn’t shake the feeling that something about her was slightly off lately. He tucked it away in the back of his mind, a concern for another time, but not one that he wanted to forget or let lie uncovered for too long.

“I know the records say this planet is healing but it certainly doesn’t look like it,” she said skeptically, and he let her turn his attention to a more mundane topic for now, sensing that she didn’t want to discuss the tragic life of Anakin Skywalker in her present mood.

“It has some signs of life now,” he observed, grimacing at the few trees that had struggled to grow on the overheated crust of the ground. Many of the closest ones were on fire, victim to the shifting lava tides not far beyond the surface.

“What are we looking for exactly?” Rey asked, turning to look at him and then reaching for her saber at the same time that he reached for his. She had felt it, too. A sudden movement in the trees and the ripple of life energy in the Force.

They were not alone.

A flick of her flingers illuminated both ends of a long double ended saber staff as she lowered herself into a defensive position at his side. She finished it merely days ago and, he realized as his brought his own white saber springing into life, it had been just in time.

Whoever these people were, they were heavily armed, and they did not stop to ask for explanations. They spilled through the trees and advanced on Ben and Rey with sharp bladed weapons and a single minded determination, a blind hatred, that told Ben they had some kind of connection to the dark side of the Force, even if they did not appear to be entirely Force sensitive themselves.

Rey turned her body until she was pressed against him back to back and he could feel the rising wave of her rage as they came at her one by one, each of them falling to the cutting arcs of her blades. He kept part of his mind on her, attuned for any sign of trouble or distress as he cut a wide path through his own opponents. Her breathing remained deep and even at his back, unfazed by the sheer number of them due to the intensity of their recent sparring sessions and her faith in him to hold his half of their circle secure.

The seamless team effort that they had used on Snoke’s guards paled in comparison to their performance now. They fought, moved, breathed, and thought as one and when she stepped forward and kicked off a nearby tree he bent neatly to let her roll over his back and smoothly sever the head from the shoulders of the last of their assailants.

“What was that all about?” she mused, flinging the head away from her where it hit the ground and rolled, bouncing over the uneven surface until it came to a stop at the base of a carved stone box.

Ben narrowed his eyes, scanning the box and exhaling in relief as he recognized the engravings. “Sith writing,” he said. “That’s something at least.”

He walked to the box, stepping over the bodies of those they had just slain, and paused as Rey moved to stand beside him.

“Well, let’s see what it is,” she said, and pushed the lid back until it slid off the box and landed on the hot ground beside the head.

It was empty.

Rey huffed beside him and he felt the irritation curl through her.

“Looking for something?”

The voice was unfamiliar, with a strange inhuman pitch, and they both reached again for their sabers as they looked around cautiously for the source.

Rey nudged him hard with her elbow and pointed through the trees to a marsh where the water boiled, and steam rose heavy through the air. In the water was the giant head of a fallen statue and on the head of the statue was a large creature with many legs that was calmly regarding them with many sets of large eyes.

“Do you know what used to be in this box? Or where it went?” Rey called back, taking a few small steps closer and peering at the creature through the haze of steam.

“Perhaps,” it answered. “Who are you and why do you seek the treasures of Darth Vader?”

Ben walked forward, sinking into the soft earth as he approached the edge of the marsh. “I am the Emperor,” he said. “And grandson of Darth Vader.”

“Hmm,” hummed the creature. “And yet neither of those things kept Vader’s cultists from trying to kill you.”

“Is that who those people were?” Rey asked and the creature turned its face to look at her, blinking it’s many large eyes slowly.

“Yes,” it said. “Who are you?”

“I’m Rey,” she answered. “Known to the galaxy as Kyra Ren, the new empress of the Imperial Galactic Republic.”

“Ah,” the creature said. “And I am the Oracle, known to the galaxy as the Eye of Webbish Bog.”

“You’re an oracle?” Ben asked, surprised. He had never seen an oracle, but he had not expected to find one here, nor for it look so much like an oversized bug.

“Do you have questions, young emperor?”

“I need to know what is threatening my wife, what is threatening my people.”

“A noble and selfless request,” the Oracle said, nodding slowly. “But the question you ask is one that I cannot answer.”

“Why not?” Rey asked indignantly.

“The threat you speak of, I cannot see, though I do not know why. I see all that happens in the galaxy, but I cannot see this.”

“Fine,” Ben said shortly. “What do you see?”

“I see  _ you  _ ,” said the Oracle. “I have seen signs of your return for generations. The dyad reborn is not something that is easily overlooked.”

“The what?”

The Oracle sighed. “You are a dyad in the Force,” he explained slowly, as though speaking to a particularly inattentive child. “Two that are one. You share two halves of the same soul, a reincarnation of the prime Jedi. One who is neither light, nor dark, but the physical representation of the balance between them.”

Ben felt the knowledge settle over him, filling in the missing pieces in what he knew about his connection with Rey and the mysterious bond that had flourished between them. It felt right, an explanation for how they were expected to do so much, to shoulder the burden that had been placed upon them.

“That’s why we have to be the ones to bring peace and balance to the Force,” Rey said, and he knew that she had come to the same conclusion. “Then help us,” she commanded. “Help us to defend ourselves and our people.”

“I told you, I cannot see…”

“What was in the box?” Ben cut in.

“A wayfinder,” the Oracle said, its tone curt after being interrupted.

“A Sith map,” Ben said, answering Rey’s unspoken question. “Map to what?” he asked the Oracle. “What happened to it?”

“A map to somewhere precious to the Sith, someplace called Exegol. Darth Sidious destroyed the wayfinder here many years ago, when he first began to suspect that the heart of his apprentice could be turned.”

Ben pushed a frustrated hand through his sweat drenched hair. “Exegol is as good anywhere else for us to search next for clues. Do you know where it is?”

“No,” said the Oracle. “But I know that there were two maps made and the other was with Sidious when the second Death Star exploded above Endor.”

“Then it was destroyed,” Rey said bitterly.

The Oracle shuffled its legs, mouth working anxiously. “It is not so easy to destroy what the Sith have made. Search the seas of Kef Bir, on what little wreckage remains of the old weapon. You will find what you seek.”

***

Rey stood on a fragmented piece of what had once been the most feared weapon in the galaxy. It was small compared to Starkiller Base, but its predecessor had been enough to destroy the entire planet of Alderaan all those years ago.

They had left the Falcon perched precariously on a flat piece of the wreckage behind them, not wanting to have to find a way to cross the tumultuous water to land it further away amid the ripple of brown grasses that stretched on endlessly from the shore.

Ben was looking out over the water, standing motionless beside her as he and the Knights silently assessed the rubble, trying to decide how to begin the search for something so small on a piece of debris so large.

“A wayfinder is Sith technology,” Rey mused. “It should be ripe with energy. Once we’re inside, it should not be difficult to follow that energy to its source.”

Ben nodded absently and his brow furrowed as he looked at her. “It’s going to be dangerous inside, unstable and waterlogged and full of debris. Be careful,” he told her softly, kissing her cheek before he turned to find a way inside.

It was easy to find a place to crawl inside, holes had been torn in the side of the structure in the explosion that were more than large enough for them to slide through. Finding a way to move around the inside was more challenging, with large chunks of the floor missing in places and revealing that the same was true for several floors above and below them, forcing them to crawl through panels and scale the walls as they tried to catch some hint of dark energy in the air.

After more than an hour they split up into groups of two to cover ground more quickly, the Knights moving further into the interior of the wreckage and Ben and Rey starting a steady upward climb that they hoped might bring them to a vantage point that would allow them to see more clearly the places that they hadn’t yet searched.

It was halfway up a climb that would allow them to go around a broken crevice several floors deep that Rey felt the first stirrings of darkness. Whispers in a language that she did not speak, echoed in her ears and she did not need to understand the words to know the meaning, to feel the temptation as it promised to give her everything she could ever want.

“Do you feel it?” Ben called down to her. “The wayfinder must be up here somewhere.”

They climbed faster, Rey’s fingers digging into the sharp edges of the wall as she boosted herself over the edge at the top only to find Ben standing at the edge, staring across the gap with an unreadable expression on his face.

She turned, following his gaze until she spotted movement on the wall across from them. A woman in white was climbing the wall, her pace steady and sure as she reached for the next foothold. Three familiar buns and an uneasy feeling in her stomach told Rey that this, whatever this was, was more a projection of the Force than it was a living-being.

“Do you see her?” Ben asked quietly, his confusion a dull pulse in the bond.

“Yes,” Rey said, her voice barely more than a whisper. “Is that…me?”

“Ah…it looks like you, but I can’t feel her. Not in the bond and not in the Force.”

Another wave hit the side of the wreckage, drenching them in sea spray and the tang of salt and foul water choked her as she watched this apparition of herself move through the wreckage of the Death Star. It seemed that version of her, too, could feel the pull of the dark vengeance that she was searching for.

She turned to look at Ben and found that his eyes, dark with anger and curiosity, were also watching this strange manifestation of the Force. There was something here that they were meant to see and they both moved together soundlessly to follow the other Rey when she pulled herself over the edge and then disappeared around the corner.

“What do you think is happening here?” she whispered, reaching for his hand and his mind as the familiar comfort that the universe has to offer.

“I don’t know,” he mumbled, looking carefully over his shoulder to ensure the corridor was still empty before they moved around the corner themselves.

Standing in front of the large broken viewport, steps away from an old, abandoned throne, they found the vision of the other Rey. The air was charged with her anger, vibrating with her fear as she looked with wide eyes into the vision that the Force had created of Ben. Unlike Rey in her white robes and tight three-bunned hairstyle that the real Rey had stopped wearing nearly a year ago when she had slipped away from the Resistance and become an empress instead of a Jedi, the vision of Ben didn’t look much different from the reality of him. He was still tall and broad and dressed all in black but when the vision of Rey struck out at him in her rage, he blocked the blows from her blue blade with a saber that still crackled red and furious.

Rey shook her head and looked up at her husband. “Why would I attack you? I don’t understand wha…” Her question trailed away as the energy in the air shifted, the pulses of the light and dark sides of the Force clashing as the vision of the two of them were clashing, and the sound of whispered voices filled her mind, echoing as though the speakers were far away.

_ Follow them _

_ You must see _

_ You have to understand _

_ You have to know _

“Know what?” Rey asked but the voices fell silent and Ben was already moving quickly after the retreating vision as their battle carried them outside and onto the wave drenched wreckage.

They both watched, their faces grim, as Rey attacked him again and again, her face set in harsh lines with teeth bared.

Ben realized what was going to happen a moment before she did and he tried to shield her from it as the Rey in their vision suddenly seized the advantage of some distraction and wrapped her hand around the hilt of Ben’s red saber and plunged the blade ruthlessly through his midsection.

“No!” Rey screamed, watching from her place in Ben’s arms as the vision’s eyes went wide with shock and horror over what she had done. “Why are you showing me this?” Rey sobbed quietly against Ben’s chest as the vision held her hand over the wound, pouring herself into the work of healing the damage that she had caused.

_ Look _

_ See what might have been _

_ The path not taken _

_ The future not lived _

_ A life without love _

_ Without balance there is only death _

The watery wreckage of Kef Bir vanished, and Rey pulled quickly out of Ben’s arms as they both ignited their sabers. They were in a different place now, a cavernous room with crumbling walls lit by faint blue light.

There was another vision of them, both collapsed on the floor as Ben cradled her body in his arms, his hand resting on her stomach as he pulled in the energy from around him and let it flow into her.

“Am I…”

“I think so,” he said, and his voice was husky with unshed tears.

“I don’t think you can help me,” she said sadly, but the vision of Rey reached for Ben’s hand, then blinked open her eyes and sat up, looking at her Ben with surprise and a sudden rush of unexpected love. She whispered his name, pressed her lips to his in a greedy rush that made Rey laugh because she still often felt the same way about kissing him, but then he fell and vanished leaving the vision of Rey broken and alone.

Her grief pushed out at them through the Force, hot and writhing with the loss of him and all that might have been.

The vision began to fade and looked around at the wide sky above the wreckage of the Death Star. “This is what would have been if we hadn’t found each other?”

The Force whirled around them, light and dark weaving together in a tapestry brilliant energy until the air nearly sang with the joy of it.

_ Without balance there could only have been death _

_ There could be no hope _

_ There could be no future _

_ With balance there comes the chance at life _

_ You will know what you have to do _

_ You must have the strength to do it _

The energy ebbed away, leaving the two of them standing in the salt spray of the sea, alone except for each other.

Rey turned into him, pressing her face into his chest, and giving in to her tears as his arms held her safe and steady. “I’m so sorry,” she said, a violent sob coursing through her as he gently rubbed her back and murmured soothing reassurances in her ear. “I tried to kill and then you died because of me.”

“No,” he said, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “This was just a warning, a reminder that we did the right thing by coming together and bringing balance to the galaxy. So that we know that we are stronger together and we can face whatever this is that threatens our peace.”

She hiccoughed and rubbed her face on the thick wet fabric of his tunic. His presence in the Force was warm and calm enough to begin to settle her own ragged energy. He was anchor holding her in place on the wave tossed sea of her fear.

“Besides,” he teased with a smile, “do you really think I would let death take me away from you like that? I would come back for you sweetheart.”

She nodded and chuckled weakly, absolutely certain that he would cross time, space, and even death to be with her if he had to.

“Let’s hurry and find what we came here for,” she said. “I’m ready and I want to go home.”

It didn’t take long for them to locate the Sith wayfinder, the dark energy bled from it into the Force guided them like a beacon to the small room hidden just beyond the abandoned throne room. The dim light inside it glowed a sickly green as it revealed a map to a planet that wasn’t on any star chart they had ever seen.

“Another secret planet,” Ben mused. “First Ahch-To for the Jedi and now this one from the Sith. Whatever is there it’s probably worse than  _ Luke _ .”

Rey frowned at him over the top of the wayfinder, at the grumpy lines of his face as he considered the path they would have to follow, which she could tell would be a dangerous navigational nightmare.

“We have no idea what it might be,” she said, “and that alone is enough to terrify me.” She reached for his hand, for the familiar feeling of his warmth through the bond. If she ever lost him the way she had seen in their vision… Even the thought of it left her hollow and cold, as though part of her had been carved out and the rest left to die. “I can’t lose you, Ben.”


	26. Everything I Have to Give

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is a great pain to love, and a tragedy to escape this pain- Ion Luca Caragiale

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This seems to be another shorter chapter. Hopefully we can get back to ones that are a little longer but I don't forcing it or creating super long chapters so we'll have to see what happens.
> 
> I've been trying hard to finish my current WIPs and part of that is to give the fic that is closest to being finished two updates instead of one every time it comes up in my writing rotation. I just finished a WIP and this one is now the closest to being done! This is even better because not only will each update actually be two chapters within a few days of each other but I also went over my outline for the rest of the story and I think it's only going to take about 5 more chapters for this story to finally be finished. We really are approaching the end and I am so excited to share the rest of this with you!
> 
> Once again thank you all so much for your support. I have adjusted the expected chapter count, fingers crossed that I don't have to increase it back up again.

Everything about the planet of Exegol was foul- the regions of space that surrounded it, the stench that hung in the air, the crumbling stone walls, the inexplicably blue light that illuminated everything on the surface.

Nothing could compare, however, to the feeling that settled over Ben’s soul when the creeping dark energy that bubbled up from the planet’s core reached his mind. It reminded him of Snoke, of the gasping choking feeling that still woke him far too often in the middle of the night as his dreams pushed echoes of the past into his consciousness.

It was cold, merciless, greedy, and hungry. It wanted him back, whispered promises of unshakeable power and limitless mortality for him and everyone he loved. A familiar temptation, but one that never lost its appeal.

Beside him Rey shuddered, her eyes wide and lips slightly parted. Her short encounter with Snoke had not prepared her for this.

“Are you alright?” he asked, searching her face for signs of distress or- far worse- surrender.

She blinked up at him slowly, in a near daze as the pull of it wrapped around her seductively. It took a moment for her to realize he had spoken and when she did she gave her head a hard shake, flinging her energy into the Force to knock back some of the dark and make room for her to breathe again.

“I’m fine,” she assured him. “What is this place?”

“I’m not sure, but the energy is coming from there,” he said, pointing at the large pyramid that rose menacingly above the surface.

Rey bit her lip, considering as she looked from the shuttle that had brought them to the surface with their knights to the large dreadnought that hovered in the atmosphere above the planet.

After Kef Bir, neither of them had wanted to take any chances on Exegol and a surprise visit to the commander in charge of the nearest sector of the Outer Rim had been it all that was required to have a larger ship and a full crew of stormtroopers and pilots turned over to them. A week of waiting to gather a small show of strength and collect everything they needed had brought them here, and still he could tell she was torn on the correct path forward.

“I don’t like this, Ben,” she said finally. “We don’t know what’s waiting for us here, but I know that the vision, the one where you died…it looked a lot like this planet. It was blue, just like this.”

“We could send in a battalion of stormtroopers,” he suggested.

“Into what kind of trap?” she asked impatiently. “You know we can’t do that.”

“Then we go in ourselves and we find out what we need to know,” he decided, waving a hand to signal the knights to follow them as they approached the shadow of the pyramid.

The landscape was barren, stripped of all life, and each step that they took kicked up small clouds of dust into the air. The only footprints were their own, no signs anywhere of habitation. Ben wished that set his mind more at ease.

Both sabers flared into life as they stepped into the darkness beneath the pyramid, the only light to guide their way as they huddled together on a large platform that lowered them down far beneath the surface into the depths of the planet.

The further they went, the more the dark side of the Force pulsed around them like a heartbeat. The Knights shifted restlessly- their connection to the Force was limited, but enough for them to feel the deep sucking void that waited beneath their feet. Ben wondered for a moment if bringing them had been a mistake, if maybe stormtroopers would have been better, unable to feel the temptation of the dark side... And then Vicrul muttered under his breath- a vicious swear that made the others laugh and dispelled the tension.

Once, he might have been right to worry. Their allegiance to him had been superficial at best, held thinly in place by the rules of the group and Snoke’s watchful eye. But that was no longer the case- they had seen for themselves when he took the galaxy in a fit of blind rage and then held it despite the odds stacked against him, when he had won a woman who was as determined and ruthless as he was, when he bent everything around him to his own will and his own vision. They knew without a doubt that he would kill them, that Rey would, if they wavered even in the slightest- unwilling to sacrifice what they had built for sentiment or friendship.

The Knights served the dark side, and they saw the living embodiment of that in Kylo and Kyra. Not the foolish destructive kind where the wielder held on so tightly to power that it slipped through their fingers, but the patient and cunning kind, watchful and eternal.

There was no power in the universe that could turn their loyalty now, Ben realized.

The platform stopped descending when they reached a large hallway, pitch black and silent except for the occasional echoing sound of water running down the walls and dripping from the ceiling. The air was cold, their breath hanging in lingering vapor in the small circle of light cast by their sabers.

“There’s nowhere to go but in,” Rey said, voice steady and hand warm on his arm. “I don’t hear anything or feel anything alive down here.”

He murmured an agreement. There was no ripple of life in the Force, no matter how much he strained to sense it. The cavernous halls that they crept down felt desolate, empty, abandoned. There was nothing at all for him to feel except the insidious choking presence of the dark side and a bone deep certainty that something was about to go catastrophically wrong.

“I have a bad feeling about this,” he told her softly, placing a restraining hand on Rey’s arm as she stepped forward to round the next corner.

Whatever response she might have made was lost as Ap’Lek walked around them into the next room. “Kylo,” he called back over his shoulder, “you need to come and look at this.”

He let go of Rey’s arm and stepped into something out of his darkest nightmares.

Large tanks, some still half full of vile yellow liquid, lined the walls as far as he could see into the dark room, connected at various points with countless wires and tubes that crept haphazardly over the floors and disappeared into the ceiling.

Between them, in what he recognized as the language of the Sith, arcane symbols had been carved into the walls and each wept with memories of agony and betrayal. Whoever had been sacrificed to give these emblems their power, they had not gone to their deaths willingly or painlessly.

“Ben,” Rey whispered, her hand covering her mouth with trembling fingers as she pointed to the tank nearest to them on the left. His stomach twisted violently as looked more closely, first at that tank and then the room around it, rejecting the sight of numerous pitiful creatures- twisted, mutilated and half formed- that were suspended in the tanks or discarded like garbage in the cold stone floor.

There were tables scattered around the room, abandoned exactly as they had been the last time they were used and strewn with instruments of ancient medicine and unimaginable torture. Sharpened blades, the long piercing menace of needles attached to syringes filled with mysterious substances, clamps, and saws, and tubes whose purposes he doesn’t want to imagine.

“What is this place?” Ushar asked, kicking the corner of a table softly with his booted foot. “What purpose does this serve?”

“Cloning,” Ben said, recognizing some of the technology from his study of the old wars and the planet Kamino.

“That doesn’t make sense,” Kuruk argued. “Cloning is not an easy process, but it’s one that has been well developed and understood. It’s clean, efficient. It doesn’t look like this.”

“No, it doesn’t,” Ben agreed, remembering the images he had seen of Geonosis with its bright walls and spotless surfaces and assembly line precision. “It’s cloning but it’s more than that. They were trying to do…something else. Something darker.”

“Very good,” said a familiar voice in the hall behind them. “Maybe you aren’t as witless as you look, after all.”

Rey bared her teeth as she looked over his shoulder, rage exploding through the bond so hard that it knocked him back a step as he turned to face the man who had spoken.

Enric Pryde stood in the cavernous hallway behind them, surrounded by a small force of stormtroopers in red armor unlike anything Ben had ever seen. They had all been so distracted by their discovery, so wrapped in the heavy opaque weight of dark energy that no one had felt them coming.

“General,” Ben said, his voice clipped and short as he shifted his body to shield Rey from the direct line of fire from the many blasters now pointed directly at them. “I assume you have an explanation for this? You weren’t granted permission to abandon your post.”

Pryde smiled, his teeth white and even in the dim light. “I don’t take orders from you, Ren, or that mouthy little Jedi whore that you’ve installed on a throne that has never belonged to you.”

Ben’s hand was already on his saber, silently unhooking it from his belt, and he felt the slight movement behind him that told him Rey was doing the same.

Pryde’s smile vanished, replaced in an instant with a look of cold disdain. “Don’t be foolish. You know you can’t win this- you’re outnumbered and trapped. You won’t get lucky this time, like you did the others.”

The pieces fell into place in Ben’s mind then- the chancellor and his foolishly bold plan to have them killed, the assassin sent to murder his wife in broad daylight. Pryde underestimated them time and again, his ego and sense of self-importance so over inflated that he failed to see them for the threat that they really were.

“And what will you tell the dreadnought full of officers awaiting our return? That you committed a mutiny and murderer your emperor?” Rey asked, stepping back in small nearly indiscernible steps.

“Isn’t that what you did?” Pryde countered, and Ben’s mouth tightened as he realized the truth of that. If they died here, someone would need to step into the power vacuum that had been left behind. If they didn’t, the galaxy would once again descend into chaos.

“So, you intend to rule?” Ben asked, unable to keep the contempt out of his voice as he tried to stall Pryde long enough for Rey to make her escape. She had backed up several feet into the dark now, her movements slow and restrained enough that Pryde hadn’t noticed.

“Of course not, but  _ they  _ will,” Pryde said, and Ben was repulsed by the absolute fanaticism on the older man’s face. “Finally, the true secret plan of the true emperor will be revealed, the one that should have been finalized ages ago before  _ you,  _ ” he sneered, “ruined everything.”

“Is that what all this was?” Ben asked, waving a hand at the tanks along the wall. “A secret plan of the emperor?”

“Force sensitive clones,” Pryde said. “A necessary precaution when he realized how little loyalty Darth Vader truly possessed, but they were never able to perfect the process enough for the bodies to contain his spirit.”

“So, he’s gone,” Ben said. “Why do you still give a dead man your loyalty?”

“There is more than one way to survive death,” Pryde said, his tone dripping with confidence. “His spirit has passed into the Force but Palpatine discovered many things in the Unknown Regions, ways that he could still control the fate of the galaxy and resurrect the legacy of the Sith. Did you really think that nothing lies beyond our own galaxy except shipyards to produce the First Order’s fleet? Snoke was right, you are a foolish child.”

Ben flicked the switch to ignite his saber as he felt Rey slip unnoticed from the room through a back exit that Pryde must not have known existed. She was focused, her energy directed solely on whatever task she had set about completing but he knew he had run out of ways to stall, had bought her as much time as he could.

The Knights, poised now halfway between their emperor and whatever mysterious exit their empress had disappeared through, unsheathed their own weapons as the first red trooper fired his blaster directly at Ben.

The sound echoed loudly in the underground cavern as Ben deflected the deadly red beam with the blade of his saber, sending it ricocheting back in the direction that it had come and shattering the armor of another trooper who collapsed at the impact.

One down, more than a dozen left to go.

They fought their way out the back, Ben reflecting as many bolts of blaster fire as he could, using the Force to freeze several that might have hit the knights if he hadn’t, as the troopers moved into the room ahead of Pryde.

They pushed one at a time through the small exit that Rey had found, each of the Knights in turn and Ben last as Pryde screamed in rage that they had found a way out of the room he believed they’d be trapped in.

They emerged into a large room, and Ben blinked as his eyes adjusted to the sudden availability of dim blue light. He recognized it instantly from the glimpses he was able to process as he fought troopers who had reached for long bladed weapons of their own when he had used the Force to pull the blasters from their hands- the high cavernous walls, deep smoking crevices in the floor at the foot of a throne carved of dark blue stone.

This was the room from the vision he and Rey had shared on Kef Bir, the one where she had died, and he had poured his own life into her until he had nothing left to give. The ultimate price, one he knew he would not hesitate to pay if it meant saving her life.

But that had been a warning, a reminder of consequences if they had come to this place without the peace and love that existed between them. That Rey had been dressed in white, her hair still firmly wrapped in the buns that she had worn in childhood, her kiss enthusiastic but stilted by shyness and uncertainty.

His Rey, the one that had waited just beyond the doorway with a lit saberstaff in hand and was currently calmly fighting her way through half a dozen troopers with bold swirling flourishes and practiced footwork, she was dressed in black, her hair pulled back into the same heavy braid that she wore for training, and she was bold, comfortable in their love and her place beside him.

It was not the same, he reassured himself, he would not lose her.

He could feel her as they fought, and he kept a small part of his mind focused on her to make sure that she wasn’t in immediate danger. That small bit of inattention, the effort that it cost him to keep her at the edge of his awareness, almost cost him his life.

She stumbled, foot slipping on the wobbling edge of a rock, and as his eyes flicked toward her to judge the cause of her sudden fleeting sense of alarm, a trooper slid past his guard and knocked the saber from his hand.

Rey regained her balance and turned to face him from across the room, her attention immediately diverted from the trooper that she was fighting to Ben as he stumbled back from the weapon that missed his face by less than a hairsbreadth.

Ushar knocked back her opponent, taking the burden of her defense off of her shoulders as she twisted her staff into two separate sabers and Ben felt her reach her concentration into his mind.

_ Ben _

He felt a swell of power in the Force and Ben looked up and met Pryde’s eyes as he wrapped his fingers around the hilt of the weapon that Rey had passed through the Force into his grasp, still warm from the heat of her skin. He saw the stunned disbelief and the first flicker of understanding that the general had severely underestimated his opponents.

He turned as the trooper fell beneath the purple blade and Ben watched him go, unable to get to him in time to prevent him from sprinting up the passageway. He would have to wait, and hope that the man could be found before he caused them any more harm than he already had.

There were few enemies left, and he felt confident enough in the Knights’ abilities to handle those that remained that he let himself search the room for Rey. He spotted her on the other side of the throne, having leapt across one of the many chasms in the floor to assist Ap’Lek when he was cornered by several troopers at once. The Knight was to her left, both of them concentrating hard on the three troopers in front of them.

Neither of them noticed the trooper that appeared out of the darkness behind them and by the time Ben saw him, it was too late.

He felt it when her body jerked suddenly and painfully forward, propelled by the impact of the bladed weapon in the trooper’s hand. The pain was thin and sharp as it sped into him through the bond and he was helpless to stop it as it stole her breath and made her eyes pop wide with surprise. Her lips pressed into a tight line, one of anger and disbelief as she spun on her heel and swung her saber in a vicious arc that split her opponent nearly in two.

Ap’Lek finished off the others as she stood panting for a moment- her hand pressed hard to her chest as the blood started to seep from between her fingers. The weapon had gone through her, entering from the back and piercing the skin in the front of her chest.

He could feel the numbness and the shock that settled over her as she was unable to summon the energy needed to remain standing and began to sink slowly to the floor. She dropped to her knees and then further, collapsing onto her side in the dirt.

He ran, his heart racing as he used the Force to help push him across the distance that separated them, but he was already calculating in his mind how this would end. He knew, even as he screamed her name and she turned her head toward the sound of his voice, he knew that he wasn’t going to get to her in time.

He could feel her fear, the sadness and regret as memories of him flashed half formed through her mind. She sobbed softly- his name barely audible through the bond as she sent the desperate plea straight into his mind.

He was still running when the bright flare of her presence in the Force went out.

***

Pryde ran, looking over his shoulder as he went and tripping over fallen stones and cracks in the floor. He couldn’t see in the dark passages without the guidance of the troopers and their lights, and he felt his way along the walls, his fingers slipping over rough stone as he prayed to whatever elements of the Force might answer that he could get to the surface before Kylo Ren, his brutally feral wife, or one of the faceless nightmares that followed them everywhere caught up to him.

He had, admittedly, been blinded by his own ambition and the reassurances of those he served. The Empire, in all of its old glory, had been the only love he had ever known. The cold ruthlessness, the merciless efficiency, the absolute unshakeable focus on a single goal at the cost of all else- it had appealed to him in a way that nothing else in his life ever had and when that empire had fallen, his loyalty had not wavered, not even once.

He had chased the echoes and the shadows and the rumors of what little had remained until it had led him to the Unknown Regions, to Snoke, to the foundations of the First Order. There he had given the new seed of the empire all of his allegiance. He could see it clearly, the path that his emperor had laid to return or revenge, to power for whatever was left of him and those who continued to serve him.

Everything had moved along exactly as had been expected for years, with the reaping of the Solo boy a crown jewel in the revenge plot of the First Order’s upper echelon. Snoke had manipulated Skywalker, his sister, and her pathetic wastrel of a husband until the boy had fallen right into his hands. It was a suitable punishment for the part they had played in the emperor’s downfall and at the time it had seemed like a great victory.

No one had predicted that the boy would turn on Snoke, that he would allow his heart and mind to be turned by the little Jedi girl- a worthless scavenger whose Force abilities were a variable that they hadn’t counted on. Snoke had tried to correct the mistake, to take credit for the bond and twist their feelings until one destroyed the other but it had been too late and all of the plans, laid out carefully over the passing decades, had crumbled with Snoke’s body at the foot of his throne.

And even then, Pryde realized bitterly, no one had really seen the truth.

Not even him.

He saw it now, he knew. Saw it in the way that the girl had done the impossible, commanding the Force in a way that not even those he served were able to do. He had no explanation, no way for logic to grant him understanding of what he had seen, and he knew only one thing- that if his life was to have had any meaning and the surviving seeds of the empire be given any chance to take root and grow, he had to provide a warning.

He was close enough to the Unknown Regions for his signal to be there in minutes, to give them time to prepare, to recalculate, to know what they were dealing with. It would be enough, he believed, for there to still be hope of an eventual victory.

He burst out onto the surface of the planet, eyes still adjusting to the faint blue light that was available now that he was no longer fumbling in darkness in the passageway, and ran for his shuttle. He had no delusions now of making it off the planet himself, not with the dreadnought hovering just above the atmosphere, but if he made it to the ship then he could send the signal.

Blue lightning flickered across the sky, illuminating the ship…and the figures huddled in the shadows beneath it.

He stumbled to a confused halt, heart pounding as he squinted to make out the identities of these unexpected obstacles. The next flash of lightning brought the answer with a quick glimpse of a satisfied smirk and vibrant red hair.

“Going somewhere, General?” Hux asked and Pryde, already certain of his fate as he stared at the blaster in Hux’s hands and the stormtroopers that surrounded the shuttle. These soldiers wore white armor, and he knew their programming ensured their loyalty to Hux was absolute.

He had no chance now, but he straightened, tugging his cape into place and looking down his nose at the chancellor.

“I’m carrying out orders from the emperor,” he bluffed, “and this is not your jurisdiction. You have no power outside of Coruscant.”

Hux smiled, vicious and calculating. “Interesting, considering the frantic message that we received aboard the Ascendancy from the empress. She is no fool, and she knew she might need my particular skills. I was brought from Coruscant for just such an emergency.”

“What now?” Pryde asked, trying to keep his shoulders from slumping as he realized he was never going to make it to his shuttle or the communications system.

“Now you are to be taken into custody and interrogated,” Hux said, lifting his hand to give the order as several troopers stepped forward, prepared to overpower the general if necessary.

Pryde looked at the binders and then at Hux’s blaster. He had only one thing left to give one, one way to express his loyalty. He would choose death before he allowed the information about who he served to be tortured out of him or, far worse, ripped from his mind by the emperor.

He reached for his own blaster, still strapped securely to his belt, his mind clear and free from any regret. The shot from Hux’s weapon hit him in the chest before he even finished pulling the weapon clear of its sheath and a hot pain, stunning in its intensity, was the last thing he knew before the world around him faded away.

***

Ben sat on the cold stone floor with the body of his wife in his lap, her face bathed in soft blue light, eyes open and unseeing.

He knew it wasn’t supposed to happen this way- the Force had made that clear in their vision of Kef Bir- and he couldn’t understand what mistake they had made that brought them to this point. Nothing about it made sense, and he couldn’t think clearly through the pain that tore through his veins like fire.

He felt for her in the Force, searching the end of the bond for her presence, the comforting weight of his attachment to her, but he found nothing.

The Knights of Ren shuffled close, closing them in as they formed a loose ring, protective and watchful as they tried to understand the magnitude of their loss.

The galaxy’s loss.

Ben could feel their rising confusion, the pain and anger as their hurt turned to fury and thoughts of revenge.

He tried to block it out, to push past the overwhelming, choking feeling of his own emotions and  _ think  _ over his own panic  _. _

The voices in their vision had been clear- not coming together would have brought them to death and the choices that they had made would help them to avoid it. They had chosen love and it was supposed to ensure that they lived.

What else had the vision shown him?

Healing. He remembered that. Rey’s hand hovering over him on the wreckage of the Death Star as she undid the wound that she had inflicted. They had practiced healing, hoping that it would be enough, but he hadn’t gotten to her in time.

What else?

This place, blue light, the blank and empty look on her face- far too much like the look it had now, the soft lines of her cheeks pale and graying.

And after that?

Life, he remembered with a jolt. His own life force flowing into her until her heart beat strong and steady and pink returned to her skin.

More than healing, more than anyone had ever done before.

Resurrection.

He knew what came after, could still hear the fear in her voice on Kef Bir as she cried into his shoulder over the thought of losing him, but what else could he do? To let her go when he had the power to save her was not a choice that he could make.

He hugged her tight to his chest, her arms limp at her sides, and then settled her back in his lap with hand splayed across her torso. He knew he could do this because he had already seen himself do it. There was no doubt in him, no hesitation as he focused on his breathing, calmed his mind, and  _ gave  _ .

He was steady, strong, and it was easy for him to find wells of energy within himself. He gave it willingly, each heartbeat sending another flood of energy across the thread of the bond. The thin thread of their connection, barely still there when he began, strengthened as his energy flowed through it. Light and dark sides of the Force worked together to carry what she needed into her body until her chest rose and fell in a steady rhythm and her hand came to rest atop his own.

She blinked in confusion, her puzzlement the first thing that he felt from her as she stirred back into life. Relief settled over him as she sat up, smiling and whispering his name before her happiness was replaced by memory…and fear.

“No,” she said harshly, giving him a small shove, hands hard against his chest. “What have you done? In the vision…we saw…how could you? I can’t lose you!”

Tears ran unheeded down her cheeks as she searched his face, ran her hands over his body, looking desperately for any sign of distress.

Ben smiled, shaking his head as he caught her hands in his and pressed a kiss to her knuckles. “You aren’t going to lose me,” he assured her.

“But the vision…we saw what happens when you save me.”

He shook his head again. “I can’t explain it, sweetheart, but I feel fine.”

“You’re okay?” she was still looking at him skeptically, but there were no more tears in her eyes.

“Tired,” he admitted, “but nothing more than that.”

“I don’t understand,” she said, tucking her head beneath his chin and settling her cheek over his heartbeat. “I was so scared.”

“So was I,” he told her, rubbing his hand over her back, his fingers tracing the skin over the path of her spine and finding so evidence of the wound that had taken her from him.

Cardo cleared his throat and Ben looked up to find the Knights still watching over them. “We should get her to the medical bay on the Ascendency,” he said from behind his helmet. “Make sure that she’s okay.”

Ben nodded, shifting her off his lap until the Knights could help her to her feet and then finding that he needed their help himself. He wobbled slightly, legs unsteady under him, until Rey gripped him around the waist and leaned into his side.

They emerged into the surface several minutes later, still holding onto each other, and found Hux and a battalion of stormtroopers poised at the entrance, readying to descend.

Hux tipped his head as they stepped into view. “We were preparing to come in after you,” he explained, waving a hand at the rows of soldiers behind him.

“There’s nothing down there now,” Ben told him. “Pryde got away.”

“No,” Hux said, his face a cold snarl. “He didn’t. Empress Kyra contacted the Ascendancy while you were below, and we caught him before he could board his shuttle.”

“Good,” Rey said, her voice hard and furious. “We need to question him. He is not the one behind all of this, but he knows who is.”

Hux sighed. “I’m sorry, Empress, but he attacked us when we tried to apprehend him.”

“You killed him then,” she said flatly. “Thank you, Chancellor, for fulfilling your promise.”

Ben looked down at her in surprise, but he was tired for questions and he allowed her to lead him to the shuttle, where he dozed with his head on her shoulder until they arrived in the hangar of the waiting dreadnought.

Medical droids were already waiting as they stepped off the ramp and he didn’t object as they hurriedly carried Rey away, already scanning her body for undetected injuries.

He shook his head when another droid approached him, holding up a finger to indicate that he wanted it to wait before looking at Hux.

“Take us home,” he commanded. “We’re taking the whole ship back to Coruscant. I’m not taking any more chances with her life.”

He relented then and let the droids begin their scans, escorting him swiftly down the corridor to the medical bay as he replayed the events of Exegol in his mind.

Pryde’s betrayal and mysterious loyalty to some unnamed threat.

How close he had come to losing Rey.

To losing himself.

He had gotten complacent, content and satisfied with his life and the peace in the galaxy. He had believed that they were being vigilant, that he had taken every precaution necessary to protect what was his, only to find out that he had a traitor at his back.

Rey had tried to warn him that Pryde was dangerous and he hadn’t taken her seriously. It was a bitter lesson that had almost cost them both their lives.

He was going to need to do better if they were going to survive and find the answer to Pryde’s riddles before it destroyed them all.

***

Rey let the medical droids do their scans and examine her as she lay in a small bed in the medical bay.

She was still sore and it took everything she had not to wince with each soft rise and fall of her chest, but she was alive and so was Ben so she held to that pain as a reminder of how lucky she was. It could have been worse, so much worse, than it had been.

She had known that she was dying, had felt the cold and the numb fear spreading through her as she lost the ability to control her fingers and then her hands, as her legs had refused to hold her up and she sank to the ground as the noise of battle had been replaced by a pervasive silence that cushioned her, held her apart from the rest as her life slipped away.

She had heard only one thing, Ben’s voice screaming her name, and had turned her head toward him just in time to make his precious face the last thing she had seen before there was nothing left of her.

How she had come back was a mystery.

The vision on Kef Bir had shown them that healing could be taken to extremes, but the price for a life had been another life, with Ben giving her all of his in a sacrifice that she would never have allowed if she had been able to stop it.

She wondered, as the droids moved around her beeping softly among themselves, what the difference had been. Was their love in this version of events simply stronger? Had they practiced healing more? Had Ben simply had more life to give since she hadn’t stabbed him on the Death Star as the other Rey had done?

She knew she might never have answers, but it felt as though they had been given a miracle, like the Force wanted them to know that they had been given a precious gift so that they would not squander it.

A second chance at life was not something that most people were given, and she would not let it go to waste. They would need to use the extra time that they received, find the lingering threat that Pryde had protected with his life, and keep their galaxy safe, balanced, and whole.

She wasn’t so foolish as to think that the Force had let them live simply to be kind. The Force wasn’t like that- all things had their place, their time. Even death, loss, destruction. If the Force had kept them alive, it was because they had a purpose to serve.

The dyad, if the Oracle on Mustafar was to be believed, had many jobs, many roles to fill. Her purpose, and Ben’s, had not yet been fulfilled.

Her musings were interrupted by a soft-spoken droid, standing at her bedside with a scanner in its hand.

“You appear to be doing well,” it said. “No signs of serious injury are detectable, and your vital signs are strong and healthy.”

“That’s good,” Rey said, pushing herself to a sitting position and smiling at the droid. “Does that mean that I can go now? I’d like to find the emperor and make sure that he’s alright.”

The droid pressed a button on the scanner and looked down at the screen. “My records indicate the emperor is also healthy and resting. He is currently asleep.”

“Oh,” Rey said, dropping a little. She had hoped that they could both leave the medical bay together and get some sleep in the large bed that waited for them in the emperor’s suit.

“While you wait for him to wake up, would you like an update on the health of the baby?”

Rey pressed a hand to her forehead, lips pursed as she stared at the shiny metal face of the droid. “What baby? Is there a child on board?”

The droid stared back at her for a moment before looking down at the scanner and pressing another button. “My apologies, Empress, I was unaware that you had not yet been informed. It is usual for expecting mothers to know sooner, but my records indicate that you have not been examined by a medical droid since you arrived with the First Order.”

Rey leaned forward, the droid’s words buzzing in her ears, almost incomprehensible.

“I haven’t been examined,” she said. “I haven’t been sick since I arrived. But I am not an expectant mother.”

The droid looked at the scanner, made another pass over her body as it beeped softly, and then back up at her face. “My scan indicates that you have never received an implant to prevent conception,” it said pointedly, “and that your child is strong and healthy. Would you like to hear the heartbeat?”

“The what?” she said, head swimming as she tried to understand the droid’s words. She had never gotten an implant, of course. Those were well beyond what the residents of Jakku were able to afford and most of them had never even heard of such a thing. Access to medical care of any kind was reserved for the dying and she had carried that habit with her when she had arrived at the Resistance and then the First Order. She hadn’t seen a medical droid in years, not since a bad fall inside a wrecked star destroyer as a child.

Ben must have assumed that she had the implant, she realized. It was common practice among the wealthier citizens of the galaxy, something that he would have taken for granted and not given much thought to.

What if he was upset, if he didn’t want a baby? They hadn’t discussed it, had been too focused on the needs of the galaxy and the constant threats to their lives. Ben’s relationship with his parents had been a constant source of pain and confusion and she had no idea how he would feel about being a father.

The droid, taking her stunned silence and absence of objection as permission, waved the scanner again and then settled just above her abdomen. A steady pulsing beat filled the room, a heartbeat that was strong but faster than Rey’s own.

“The scans indicate that the child is a boy,” the droid said, watching as Rey placed a trembling hand on her stomach. It looked down again as the scanner beeped loudly, then pressed another button. “The emperor is now awake, and he is on his way here to see you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did include hints in the last chapter that Rey was already pregnant, so the baby was conceived prior to the events on Exegol and not through the process of him saving her life. I know that idea upsets some people so I want to make it clear that that is not what happened here.


	27. Legacy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We will be known forever by the tracks we leave- Proverb

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took a little longer than I had hoped because of my week of final exams, but we are getting so close to the end and I am excited about the few remaining chapters. 
> 
> I always appreciate all of you and your support, especially those of you who have been reading along with the updates for a long time. I know you've been very patient and it has taken me a long time to get this far and I just wanted to say thank you!
> 
> If you're enjoying the story, comments are always appreciated as fuel for my writer's heart, or come and say on Twitter!

Ben raised an eyebrow in surprise when a small medical droid sped out of Rey’s med bay like she had just threatened to rearrange its circuits. It beeped at him in alarm as it passed him in the corridor and he shook his head, certain that she must have been irritated by the constant hovering and driven the thing away before it could finish its duties.

He’d have to go in and try to calm her down, convince her that she needed to let the droid do its job and finish examining her so they could be sure that she didn’t have any internal injuries. The healing power that he had used was one that they still didn’t fully understand, and he didn’t want her to have any lingering problems from her wounds.

She looked when the door hissed open, face pale and lips drawn into a tight line that matched the close hold that she had on her emotions. It had been nearly a year since he hadn’t been able to feel her every fleeting emotion through the bond, and the sudden absence of it left him bereft and confused.

Was she angry that he had saved her? Upset that Pryde had gotten away?

He cleared his throat uncertainly, hesitating by the door as he reached for her in the Force, seeking answers and reassurance and finding only a wall of rejection that hurt more than any physical pain he had ever experienced. He would rather have been left in the snow of Starkiller Base with his face cut open at her hand a thousand times than have her turn him away now.

“Rey?”

Her eyes were wild when she turned her face up to his, and her hands were clasped in her lap so tight and prim that he realized abruptly that she might be in pain herself and trying to hide it from him.

“Are you hurt?” he asked, looking around angrily for the runaway medical droid. “If that droid left without tending to your pain or some injury…”

“It’s not the droid’s fault,” she said, finally speaking in a timid voice that he had never heard her use before. She hadn’t been this frightened of him the first time she’d seen him, even before he had taken his helmet off.

“What’s your fault?” he asked, taking a step forward and only to stop again when she held up a hand to keep him where he was.

“It seems that there might have been a misunderstanding about how things are handled in places like Hosnia and how we do them on Jakku.”

“What kind of misunderstanding? Rey, I don’t understand…”

She swallowed hard and tears swelled at the edges of her lashes. “I’ve never seen a med droid unless I was hurt or dying,” she said in a rush, as though somehow that explained everything. It _ was  _ customary for people on Hosnia and the other wealthy systems to be seen regularly for health check-ups, but it had slipped his mind in the flurry of activity that had dominated his life since they had arrived on Coruscant.

“You’re ill,” he said flatly, giving her the only explanation that he could think of for why she would be so upset. If she had an illness that the med droid had identified, something that could have been detected sooner…

“Not exactly,” she hedged, taking a breath and pressing a steadying hand to her stomach. “I’m pregnant.”

He was numb, uncomprehending as the words simply refused to take root and settle in his mind. She was looking at him with all of the vulnerability of a star on the verge of collapse and all he could do was stand in front of her with the muscle in his jaw working as he struggled to form the words necessary to keep her from imploding.

“Ben?” she said “I didn’t know about the implant until the droid told me. The people on Jakku were too poor for that and I realize now that you probably assumed that I had one and…”

“I didn’t even think of it,” he admitted, the words stiff and stilted even to his own ears. “Even with Rose being so close to delivering, I just never thought of it as a possibility. I never thought…the idea of having a family was just so impossible…It’s my fault,” he finished, determined that she should not blame herself for not having access to the kind of medical care that he had always taken for granted.

“You don’t want the child then,” she said, and the wall around her emotions tightened even more, the barrier retreating until he could barely sense her even when she sat so close to him that he could almost touch her.

His fingers flexed, hands fisting at his sides as the fear rushed in. He had always ruined everything and now she was slipping through his grasp again before the full color had even returned to her cheeks after the last time he had almost lost her.

She isn’t even looking at him anymore when he says, “I don’t want a child to be stuck with me as their father and I don’t deserve to be a father after what I did to Han.”

He couldn't resist the memory that filled his mind of the vision he shared with her after Crait, the sight of her plump and rosy cheeked with a hand lingering over her rounded stomach and the toddler with his unruly mop of black curls. He had shown it to her then because he knew that she would want it as much as he did, but he never dared to think that it could ever be the truth.

The images flowed across the bond with his turmoil, lapping gently at the barrier that she had erected between them until she sighed slightly and opened her mind to him just enough for the message that he needed her to understand to slip through.

Her whole body jerked and then relaxed, her shoulders slumping forward and losing the too rigid posture that she’d held since he’d come into the room. As she did so the mental restraint also melted away, and he was suddenly enveloped by the intensity of her emotions- joy, excitement, and fierce protectiveness laced through with hints of doubt and worry that he quickly came to understand were rooted in her concern over his reaction.

She wanted the baby desperately and was terrified that he didn’t feel the same.

“You’re going to be the  _ best  _ father,” she whispered with a sniffle. “And Han would want that for you, Ben. He wanted you to have everything.”

She didn’t stop him this time when he crossed the space between them and pulled her into his arms, just turned her head to bury her face in the still dirty folds of his tunic and weep. He rubbed his cheek on her hair, breathing in the scent of sweat and heat and dried blood.

He’d been given everything already- a galaxy at peace, a healing relationship with his mother, Rey and her love and miraculous chance at life. Now, in a stroke of fortune that he didn’t understand and was certain that he didn’t deserve, a child.

Echoes of Snoke’s voice in his mind, ingrained over a lifetime of manipulation and insidious whispers, told him that he wouldn’t ever be good enough for this family that he had made. That someday Leia and Rey and his child would see through the layers of decency that he worked to build and see what a pathetic failure he was, that he was destined to hurt or disappoint them. He had been less frightened when he had first held the fate of the galaxy in the palm of his hand than he felt now, holding this one small woman and the future that had taken root inside her.

Rey shifted in his grasp, leaning back until she could grasp his jaw in her slender persistent fingers. “Snoke was wrong about you, about all of it. We’ve proven it so many times already and we’re going to keep proving it. Together.”

He leaned into her touch, body shuddering at the indomitable will in her voice. He knew better than to argue with his wife when she faced a problem with that unshakeable faith. “Let’s get the droid back in here and have him finish his scans. I want to be completely sure that everything is fine with you and the baby. I can’t believe I almost lost both of you.”

“The droid was finished,” she said calmly. “I just scared him off when he told me about the baby because I wasn’t sure how you’d feel. We’re both fine and healthy but I wanted to tell you before some mouthy droid announced it first.”

“You’ve spent too much time with Threepio,” he said with a smile.

She laughed but didn’t deny it. “He does tend to say the worst possible thing at all times,” she admitted.

Ben chuckled and laid his hand tentatively on her abdomen, searching her face and the bond for signs of pain and finding none. “You’re sure that the droid didn’t find anything wrong? Your wounds are healed and there’s no permanent damage?”

“He said I was fine and didn’t find anything wrong with the baby, either. The scans were normal, and his heartbeat was strong.”

“His?”

She grinned and tipped her head onto his shoulder. “The droid said it was a boy.”

“Oh,” he breathed. Memories of his childhood ran through his mind, all of them fragments of the time he had spent with Han. The worship he’d felt as a boy who had just wanted to be a pilot like his father, the disappointment and loss whenever he’d left his wife and child behind to go on some dangerous adventure. “You’ll help me?”

She nodded, able to follow the thread of thought and emotion as it washed over her. “I’ll always help you and we won’t be our parents,” she promised, and if there was doubt in her mind she buried it deep beneath her determination and the desire she had for a family of her own.

“Rey, your parents…” He looked guiltily down at her, but her eyes were closed, lashes fanned across her cheeks. He had forgotten that she must have her own insecurities, her own doubts about how she would manage to be better than the people who had sold her. He’d never doubted her ability to love, but would she?

“I know,” she interrupted, patting his hand without opening her eyes to look at him. “Someday I’ll have to deal with that, but today we’ll just be happy.”

“Today we’ll be happy,” he agreed, but his gaze lingered on the hole in her tunic and the miraculously smooth skin beneath it. They had so much to be happy for- her life and the baby now topping his own personal list- but they also had much to fear. Pryde was dead but whatever had set him on this path of destruction was not and they would have more to deal with than just their own emotional wounds if they wanted a safe life for their family and the galaxy.

***

Leia, predictably, hovered over both of them from the moment that the command shuttle touched down on the landing pad at the palace.

She was the first one to run up the walkway, her lips a thin line of worry as she searched for injuries and pressed concerned hands to both of their faces. They waited patiently and exchanged meaningful looks with Hux as he endured a similar examination from Edelphi.

“You’re alright,” she said finally, sniffing back tears and straightening the fabric of her gown with a businesslike shake.

“We told you we were,” Ben reminded her reasonably, only to have her slap gently at his arm in rebuke.

“I needed to see it for myself,” she explained, looking to Rey for support. “I’ve lost too much already.”

“Mom,” he said softly, but she shook her head, hand waving a dismissal.

“No, we don’t need to talk about that,” she said firmly. “I just needed to make sure that neither of you were hurt.”

“Well, actually,” Rey began but Leia pulled her into an eager hug, and she feel silent. Her eyes met Ben’s, her doubt meeting his along the bond. They reached a silent agreement not to divulge everything, no reason to upset her more than she was when they had no answers to give to soothe her.

The Knights shuffled away, shaking their heads at the desperate displays of affection. They nodded to Finn as they passed, walking into the palace as he walked out.

“You’re back,” he called, his smile wide and proud. “I know you’ve had an interesting trip and you’ve got a lot to deal with, but Rose has been waiting for you. There’s someone she’d like you to meet.”

Rey looked at Leia, who nodded with a smile. “Early in the morning yesterday,” she said, confirming the answer to Rey’s unanswered question. “We wanted to tell you but so much else had happened…”

“There will be time to talk about everything that happened on Mustafar and Exegol later,” Rey said excitedly, tugging Ben up the walkway toward the palace and smiling back at them over her shoulder. “We have something more important to do right now.”

“Rey,” Ben said, trying to work his hand out of her grip. “I don’t think Finn wants me to come along for this.”

She frowned. “Of course he does,” she said, tightening her grip on him as she pulled him along. “You’ve both put the past behind you.”

“For him to do his job, yes,” he agreed. “But this is his wife and his baby- it’s personal.”

Rey turned, determined to drag him along against his will if she had to, only to find Finn looking pointedly at Ben.

“Yes, we want both of you,” he called, his voice carrying easily over the decreasing distance between them. “Rose is insistent on showing her off to absolutely everyone.”

He gave in then and let himself be urged along down the corridors to the transport that would take him to the living quarters that had been assigned to Finn and Rose when they had declined the offer to live in the palace for a space of their own.

It wasn’t the same level of opulence, but there was more privacy than the palace guards allowed in the palace and it was large and comfortable, with windows that looked out over the setting sun.

Rose was sitting in a plush chair, watching the traffic as it glided by and patting the back of a small bundle that rested against her shoulder. She held a finger to her lips as they entered, urging them to be quiet, but she was smiling and nearly vibrating with joy.

Rey rushed quickly and quietly to her side, peering under the blanket and touching her finger softly to the small fist that rested beside the baby’s tiny bow of a mouth.

“She’s beautiful,” Rey said softly, her awe clear in her hushed and breathy tone. “What’s her name?”

“Paige,” Rose said with a sad smile. “I think my sister would have liked that, don’t you?”

“She would have loved it,” Rey agreed, giving Rose a gentle hug, and trying hard not to disturb the sleeping baby.

“Would you like to hold her?” Rose asked and Rey nodded, her eyes misty with tears as Paige was placed carefully into her waiting arms.

“You’re next,” Finn said to Ben, clapping him on the back and smiling when Ben looked at him in surprise. “Isn’t that right, Rose?”

“Of course,” she agreed. “We’re happy that you’re here, Ben. We heard about what happened with Pryde and we’re so glad that you’re safe.”

He glanced doubtfully at Finn, who just nodded his agreement with his wife. There was no anger or resentment on his face anymore.

“Look, Solo, I know we have a… well… _ complicated  _ past and I wasn’t great to you when we first came here, but you’ve done good things for the galaxy, for Rey, for me and Rose,” he gestured around at their home and Rose smiled gratefully. “I’m ready to let the past go. If there’s anything I can do to help with whatever is happening, I’ll do it.”

Ben hesitated, his emotions dangerously close to the surface, and then cleared his throat. “We’re not sure yet, but I’ll let you know as soon as we do. And Finn?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks,” Ben said, and Rey wiped the tears off her cheeks before standing up and handing him the baby.

She was small and fragile, and wiggled slightly when Rey moved her into the crook of his arm. He expected her to cry, for her face to crease in displeasure, but she remained asleep with her breathing slow and even. 

He rubbed a gentle finger over the top of her head, amazed at the softness of her hair, and looked up to find both Rose and Rey watching him knowingly. “What?”

“You’re going to be an excellent father if you and Rey ever decide to have children,” Rose predicted, taking Paige back from him as she started to fuss hungrily.

“You think so?” he asked, reaching for Rey’s hand and brushing his thumb over her knuckles. They’d agreed to tell Leia first, but he could feel her bubbling excitement and knew it wouldn’t be long before she’d be ready to tell everyone else, as well.

“Definitely,” Rose told him. “You can always tell with men who are soft for babies.”

“I have a reputation as a very frightening man,” he said, looking at her helplessly. “Ruthless emperor and all.”

“I promise not to tell anyone,” she said conspiratorially, and he sighed, rubbing a hand over his face to hide his smile.

“Thanks, I appreciate that,” he said, lips twitching. “We’re always only a step or two ahead of some of the more difficult senators.”

“Come on,” Rey said, bumping him with her shoulder and nudging him toward the door.

He took the hint and started walking, calling back over his shoulder. “We’ll come back later and let you get some rest now.”

Rey hugged Rose and Finn and then followed him out, huffing out a breath when the door closed behind them and they were alone except for their guards. “Are you ready for all of that in a few months?”

“For you, I would be ready for anything,” he promised.

***

“How was the visit with Rose?” Leia asked them the next morning when they arrived at the temple. She was already sitting in the library, staring pensively at the stand where Anakin’s saber still rested.

“Perfect,” Rey said, dropping to sit cross legged on the floor nearby and smiling up at Leia. “Paige is so small, and Rose was thrilled. It was everything I’ve hoped for since I realized after Crait that those two had feelings for each other. They make such a wonderful family.”

“Yes, they do,” Leia agreed, watching curiously as Rey wiped away a tear.

“They let me hold her,” Ben said, still amazed that they trusted him enough to place their daughter into his arms. “Rose told me that she thought I’d be a good father.”

“What do you think?” Leia asked. “Do you think you’d be a good father?”

Rey grinned and her excitement was palpable, bright and buzzing in the Force. “We’ll find out soon,” she said. “Won’t we, Ben?”

He pushed down on his doubts and smiled as his mother looked from him to Rey’s smiling face and back again. “We found out when Rey was examined after Exegol,” he explained. “You’re the first person we’ve told.”

“I’m…” Leia began, pressing a hand to her mouth. “I’m going to be a grandmother?”

“You are,” Rey confirmed. “It’s a boy.”

“I don’t know what to say,” Leia murmured, her smile small and worried. “I’m happy for both of you but…?

“But what?” Ben asked, his happiness fading in the face of Leia’s less than enthusiastic response. It wasn’t what he had anticipated, and he wondered- suddenly and with great bitterness- if she would fear his son as she had once feared him.

“It’s just all of this ugliness with Pryde and Exegol,” she explained, looking between him and Rey as her fear rippled in the Force. “I’m worried for you and I know that there’s something you aren’t telling me. You’re in more danger than you’re willing to tell anyone.”

“We are in danger,” Rey admitted, and she took Leia’s hand in hers before she began to explain what had happened to them on Exegol.”

“Wait,” Leia said, holding up a hand to stop Rey’s story when she described the moments after her injury. “You almost died? You should be in the med bay right now, not on a meditation mat!”

“I didn’t  _ almost  _ die,” Rey said firmly, and Leia began to relax until she finished with, “I did die.”

“What?”

“She died,” Ben confirmed. “I saw it and felt it in the Force. She was gone.”

“Then how is she here?” Leia asked. “I don’t understand any of this.”

“I healed her,” Ben explained, “with a technique we learned in the old texts.”

“Not even the old texts mentioned bringing someone back to life,” Leia argued. “I’ve read them myself since I came here, and I saw healing but nothing that would overcome death. It’s impossible to manipulate the Force in that way.”

“Not for us,” Rey said. “We discovered something else while we were gone, before we went to Exegol. Something that explains why we were the ones chosen to keep balance in the Force and why we can do things that others can’t.”

“We’re a dyad,” Ben continued. “Two that are one in the Force.”

“A dyad…” Leia repeated quietly. “I’ve heard rumors, legends of such things, but no one ever thought that it was actually possible.”

“It seems that it's very possible,” Rey said. “The Oracle on Mustafar told us that we are the reincarnation of the two halves of the prime Jedi.”

Leia sat in silence for several moments, a crease in her brow as she mulled the information over in her mind. “That would explain a lot,” she said eventually. “I’ve been watching the two of you since I came here, and you move and even breathe together. I’ve never seen anything else like it. The love you share is clear, but it’s so much more than that.”

“We’re fated to bring balance and harmony to the galaxy,” Rey said, wrapping Leia in a hug. “Nothing bad is going to happen to our baby.”

“Protect him,” Leia said fiercely. “Keep him safe, like Han and I failed to do for Ben.”

“You weren’t the only ones who failed him.”

All three of them turned toward the familiar voice and found the transparent form of Luke standing near the doorway, his face tired and sad even in death.

Ben’s hand shot out, a wave of energy in the Force pulling his saber from his belt into his palm as his lips pulled back in a snarl. It flared to life as Rey and Leia both scrambled to their feet.

“Ben,” Leia admonished. “Put that away! Aren’t we beyond this now?”

“No,” he said, crossing the room to put himself between Rey and Luke without ever taking his eyes off his uncle.

“He’s right, Leia,” Luke agreed quietly. “We can’t let go of the past until the truth is known and the mistakes aren’t hidden in the shadows.”

“What are you talking about?” she said, trying to edge by her son and stopping when he shifted to keep her protected behind him. “What is going on here?”

“You tell her,” Ben demanded, his voice harsh and wounded. “You tell her what you did to me.”

“Did to you?” Leia glanced up at her son’s furious face and then at her brother’s- heavy with shame and regret. “Luke?”

“I thought…Snoke had gotten to him,” Luke said. “I saw darkness in him, in his mind…and I…” Luke stammered, his words faltering as he swallowed. “I thought I could stop the vision I had from coming true. Stop the destruction before it could begin if I…if I killed him.”

Silence, cold and disbelieving, hung between Luke and the sister that had trusted him with her son.

“I didn’t go through with it,” he said timidly, “but he woke up and saw me standing there and then…then he ran to Snoke.”

“You tried to kill my child…while he was _ sleeping  _ ? And then you left…You left and let us blame him for everything that happened.”

“Yes,” Luke admitted. “I was ashamed of what I’d done.”

“You should have been ashamed,” she said, her hand pressed hard to her chest over her heart. “How could you?”

“I thought I was doing the right thing,” Luke said, shaking his head. “I was wrong.”

“We trusted you with our child,” Leia said angrily, “and you betrayed that trust.”

“I’m sorry,” Luke told her. Then he turned his gaze to his nephew. “I’m sorry, Ben.”

Ben stared at him for a long tense moment and then flicked the switch to let the beam of his saber dissolve. He didn’t have it in him anymore to hold on to so much hatred. “I’m sure you are,” he agreed. “It’s not easy to live with it when you hurt the people you love, and I should know.”

“No, it isn’t,” Luke agreed, his voice soft and grateful now that Ben had put his saber away. “And I don’t want another generation of our family to live under the shadow of the mistakes we’ve made. I want a better legacy for your son than the one we gave to you.”

“We’re working on it,” Rey told him as she gave Leia a reassuring pat on the arm. “Healing from the wounds of the past isn’t easy.”

“But you’re doing a great job,” Luke said, smiling at her warmly. “You’ve all done so much more than I ever could have hoped for.”

“This is too new for me,” Leia interrupted weakly. “I’m not ready to forgive you for what you’ve done.”

“I know,” Luke said sadly. “I hope you can, someday, but I understand that I hurt you in the worst possible way.”

“It’ll be okay,” Ben told her. “I should have explained all of this sooner, but I wasn’t sure that you’d believe me.”

Leia looked up at him, her eyes full of tears. “I don’t know if I would have,” she admitted. “I never thought he was capable of this.”

“The philosophy of the Jedi inspires fear,” Rey reminded her. “Remember when you came to Coruscant and I told you that when you learned the truth about what had driven Ben away, you would understand why he would never be a Jedi?”

“That’s another reason that I’m here,” Luke said. “To discuss the Jedi.”

“There’s nothing to discuss,” Ben said flatly. “We are not resurrecting the old Jedi Order.”

“I know,” Luke said. “I just wanted to say that I agree with that decision and I like what you’ve started here, the balance that you’re trying to achieve. It’s what I should have done.”

“Thank you,” Rey said. “But why come now? After all this time?”

“Because of what happened on Exegol,” Luke explained. “I can’t see the future, it’s clouded in darkness, but there is a threat looming over all of you. You’re going to need all the help you can find, and you need to open the temple, train others in what you have learned.”

“We’re ready, but we don’t have any students yet,” Ben said. “Parents are reluctant to bring their children here. They’re afraid we won’t let them leave.”

“Then recruit Force sensitive adults and show them that your students are allowed to have families,” Luke suggested.

“We don’t know any,” Rey said. “Force sensitivity is rare now in the galaxy.”

“Trained Force users are rare, but Force sensitivity is not,” Luke explained. “There was no one to take them, to help them learn to use their connection to the Force, but that doesn’t mean that it doesn’t exist. There are many talented people in the galaxy.

“So, we look for people with unique skills,” Ben said. “Pilots with impossible reflexes, gamblers whose luck is little too good.”

“Exactly,” Luke said with a nod. “Begin your training, prepare your galaxy. I wish I could help you more, but don’t know anymore than I’ve already said.”

“Thank you, Luke,” Rey said. “Whatever happens, we’ll be ready.”

“I hope so,” Luke told them as faded away. “May the Force be with you.”

***

Rey rubbed the slightly rounded curve of her stomach as the baby gave a gentle kick. He was restless and already strong, resistant to her attempts to soothe him as she went through another day of testing at the temple.

Luke had been right about the number of unidentified Force sensitive adults and the temple, empty for so many months, was now a bustling hub of activity. They had begun the search on Coruscant and even with others from the rest of the galaxy being slower to respond it was clear that there would be more than enough students to keep them busy.

A fact that was wearing heavily on Ben and the Knights as Rey’s pregnancy progressed and she was no longer able to help with sparring duties. They were already pushed to their limits- the Knights spending as much time as possible searching the galaxy for any hints of impending threat and Ben trying to split his time between the Senate floor and the temple.

She was helping as much as she could with meditations and healing, teaching the necessary and practical matters of energy flow and mindfulness, but it was still an overwhelming task for the others. It would be worse if they ever succeeded in finding a new source for kyber crystals and had to begin teaching for lightsaber construction and fighting techniques.

“Star…cup…tie fighter…” the young woman before her recited the images on Rey’s screen perfectly and she nodded. An ex-trooper named Jannah, she had been working for Rose since she’d left the program to come to Coruscant and Rose had finally convinced her to take the Force sensitivity test.

“That’s all correct,” Rey said warmly. “You’re welcome to stay here permanently if you wish or you can continue to work with Rose and come here when you have free time and work on your training.”

“I don’t have to stay here?” Jannah looked around uncomfortably at the temple and rubbed her arms.

“No, you don’t,” Rey assured her. “What we are doing here is different from what the Jedi used to do. You don’t have to stay in order to learn.”

“I’ll think about it,” Jannah said. “But for now, I’d like to get back to work.”

“Of course,” Rey agreed. “Please say hello to Rose for me.”

“You could say hello yourself,” a familiar voice said from behind her and Rey turned to find Finn waiting with Paige in his arms. “You know she loves it when you visit.”

“I would love to,” Rey said, peeking at Paige’s sleeping face, tucked into Finn’s shoulder with her thumb resting firmly in her mouth. “It’s just been so busy since we opened the temple.”

Finn shook his head. “It would help if your testing actually identified people who were Force sensitive. You’d be less busy then.”

Rey frowned at him and tapped the datapad against her thigh. “What do you mean? Our testing does identify those who are Force sensitive.”

He shook his head and shifted Paige to his other shoulder. “That picture guessing game sure doesn’t. Everybody can do that.”

Rey opened her mouth and then closed it again with a snap. “Can you do it?” she asked.

“Sure? I’ll show you how easy it is and then you’ll know that you need a harder test.”

Rey lifted the datapad and pressed the button to start the stream of images. “Go ahead,” she urged.

“A ball,” Finn said quickly. “Lightsaber…fork…droid…”

Rey stopped the images and peered at him over the top of the datapad. “You’ve always been able to do this?”

“Yeah? Everyone can, that’s what I’m telling you” He bounced a little on his toes to soothe Paige when she started to fuss.

“Not everyone can do this,” Rey said with a smile. “You’re Force sensitive, Finn.”

“I am not,” he said quickly, shaking his head and waving his free arm at the temple. “Trust me, this place isn’t for me. I’m a stormtrooper, not a Jedi.”

“You’re not a stormtrooper anymore and these people won’t be Jedi,” Rey insisted. “We need all the help we can get. At least come by and try? Just a little? If after a few training sessions you still don’t think you’re sensitive, then you don’t have to come back.”

He sighed. “Fine, but I know I won’t be. When do you want me to come back?”

“Tomorrow morning? You can come over with Leia,” Rey said, smiling at him gratefully. “I appreciate it.”

“Anything for you, but we should go,” he said, frowning at the comm that was beeping from his pocket. “I just wanted to stop and check on you before I met up with Rose to have dinner with Poe and Mitaka.”

Rey turned to walk with them toward the door. “He’s been so busy designing new fighters lately, I’m surprised he’s got time to have dinner. I know Kylo’s been very impressed with his work, especially since Chewie came back to help.”

“Rose bullied him into it,” Finn said with a laugh. “She’s very persuasive.”

“Yes, she is,” Rey agreed. “Tell her I’ll come by soon to visit.”

“I will,” he agreed, turning to look at her over his shoulder as he started down the steps. “Come soon, okay? You seem a bit sad lately.”

She nodded and gave him a final smile, but his words lingered in her mind for the rest of the day.

“Do I seem sad to you?” she asked Ben when he finally sat down across the table from her for dinner.

He sighed and ran a hand over his face. “Yes, you do. You have been for a while, but I figured that you’d talk to me about it when you were ready.”

“I wasn’t hiding it,” she said quietly, picking at the food on her plate with the edge of her fork. “I guess I just didn’t realize it. We’ve been so busy with the baby and the temple.”

He nodded, his eyes tired and his smile weak. “We have been busy and that’s why I didn’t want to push it.”

“I don’t have a reason to be sad,” she insisted. “The galaxy’s peaceful and prosperous, we have all of our friends and family here, everyone is safe. I have an amazing husband and soon a son of my own. I couldn’t ask for anything else.”

“Rey,” he said softly. “It’s okay to admit that you miss them.”

The dishes on the table rattled ominously. “I don’t miss them,” she argued. “ _ They  _ didn’t miss  _ me  _ .”

“Sweetheart, they weren’t good parents but that doesn't mean you weren’t valuable or that you won’t be a good mother. Whatever they were, you’re so much more.”

She wiped furiously at the tear on her cheek and glared at him. “But what if I’m not? What if I can’t do this?”

“You can,” he told her, standing up and coming around the table to wrap her in his arms. “I know you, how deeply you care for everyone. I can feel the love you have for him already.”

She shuddered, hands clutching tight to his tunic. “I’m scared,” she admitted. “I see you and Leia, and I know you have examples of love. Maybe not the exact way you wanted it, and Snoke messed it all up, but it was there. I don’t have any of that and I don’t know  _ how  _ to be a mother.”

“Leia loves you,” he told her, rubbing a hand over the heavy weight of her hair. “So, do I, and Rose and so many other people. We’ll all help you.”

She was quiet, struggling with her thoughts for so long that he finally said, “Let me take you on a trip before the baby’s born. We can go to Naboo, let you rest and visit my family there again.”

She sniffed and nodded, hating how quickly the tears came now but grateful at the thought of having time and so many wonderful women to help her prepare for the birth. “We’ll have to wait until after tomorrow morning- we’ve got to convince Finn that he’s actually Force sensitive- and then maybe we could get your mom to go? I know they’d love to meet her.”

“That’s a great…Wait, Finn’s Force sensitive?”

***

Hot sand blew over them when the door to the command shuttle opened, and the sun beat down on them, forcing him to raise a hand to shield his eyes. Not there was much to see- dunes of brown sand stretched on endlessly in every direction beneath a cloudless blue sky. He hadn’t come here, brought Rey here, for the scenery.

It was what rested beneath the sands that he cared about and he knew that she could sense it, too, as she stood silently beside him.

It had taken longer than Ben had hoped to get Rey to leave Coruscant. There was always something that needed to be tended to, and it had taken several weeks of prolonged effort to convince Finn that his abilities were, in fact, the result of Force sensitivity and not universal skill or extreme good luck.

By the time he’d had her and Leia finally ready to leave and all of their things packed onto the command shuttle, it had become clear that a trip to Naboo would be a necessity anyway, since all of Rey’s dresses had become too tight and uncomfortable. He’d already sent a request to the queen for a new wardrobe and a new handmaiden, since Hux and Edelphi’s wedding was scheduled not long after Rey was due to give birth.

Before he took her there, however, he’d arranged for them to make a short stop at a different planet.

“I’m not going down there,” Rey had said stubbornly, her face pinched with annoyance. The hand resting on her stomach had been fisted and spikes of fury were stabbing at him through the bond. “You said we were going to Naboo.”

“We are,” he’d said. “But I wanted to come here with you first.”

“There is nothing for me on Jakku,” she’d said through clenched teeth. “Just memories of pain.”

“Exactly,” he’d agreed, nodding and reaching her hand. She had let him hold it to his chest, but she’d still been tense. “I want you to show me what you’re afraid of. Let me help you the way that you helped me. Let it go, before the baby comes.”

“Fine,” she said curtly. “But there’s nothing good here.”

She said nothing else to him until the shuttle landed on the planet, her mind shielded to him as her fingers tapped nervously on her knee.

“How did you find this place?” she asked him now, her voice flat and her eyes fixed on the ground at her feet.

“I sensed it,” he said softly. “They were connected to you and I know every part of you.”

“Even this part?” she asked, her tears dropping onto the greedy sand only to be burned away before it could seep beneath the surface. “They sold me.”

“I know,” he agreed. “But they were your parents and you loved them, you waited for them. I wanted you to be able to say goodbye.”

“I don’t want to say goodbye,” she said, her voice cracking on a sob. “I want them to come back, to explain to me why they sold me, why they wanted drinking money more than they wanted me.”

He could have answered her- given her shallow words about things like addiction and desperation- but she knew all of that already better than he ever could, so he held her as her sobs shook her and her tears soaked the front of his tunic.

“I would never leave my child,” she said bitterly, long moments after her tears had finally dried. “I’m not like them.”

“I know,” he agreed.

“But I can’t hate them, even though I want to,” she continued, tightening her arms around his waist. “This brought me to you and if you can forgive your mother and Luke, then I can forgive them.”

“I thought we might put down a stone or marker of some kind,” he began but she shook her head.

“This is fitting for them,” she said, looking around at the vast emptiness. “They belonged to the desert and I don’t even know their names.”

He turned back toward the shuttle, ready to take her away from here now that she had faced her own painful past, but she stopped and looked around again, as though the answer to some unspoken question was written on the dunes.

“Where is Niima Outpost? There’s something I need to do.”

Niima Outpost was small and rundown on the horizon when he landed the shuttle at sundown, all of the residents scrambling out to the edge of the group of buildings to look at the ship.

Ben and Rey were dressed simply in plain tunics but the ship itself was enough to draw every pair of eyes. He’d given orders for the shuttle to be well protected while they were in the settlement, but even though he had personally overseen the development of a program to provide Jakku’s residents with food and supplies, he knew old habits tended to die hard.

“This is where you lived?” he asked.

“No, this is where I came to sell the parts I scavenged for portions,” she said irritably. “If you want to see where I lived, you have to go back out into the desert.”

A quick glance at the sun hanging low in the sky was all it took for him to shake his head. “Unless there’s something there that you need, let’s try to finish up your business here and go,” he told her. Even with the small accompaniment of royal guards, it made him nervous to have her here and so exposed. She was heavily pregnant and limited in what she could do to defend herself.

He watched her face carefully as they moved into town and he saw her confusion at the changes that she saw since the last time she’d been here.

Plutt’s building with its horrible little ration window was gone, Ben had sent the order for that before she had even come to him on Naboo after seeing it feature in one too many fragments of her nightmares. In its place was a new center to provide food and medicine and children peered at them from around the corner before laughing and running down the alley between two brightly colored tents.

“What happened here? There are children playing and I don’t see any of the usual gangsters who ran this place. Where’s Plutt and the others?”

“I had them removed,” he explained. “Establishing an economy out here has been difficult but we’re working on some ideas and the people aren’t hungry anymore.”

“You did all of that for them?” she asked.

“For them,” he agreed, “and for you. I knew you wouldn’t want anyone here to suffer.”

“Ben…”

“And for me,” he admitted. “There was a village here…”

She squeezed his hand when he trailed off, understanding without him having to finish.

“Oh, there she is,” Rey said suddenly, hurrying toward the edge of the village as quickly as she could with him and the guards following close behind.

“Who?” Ben asked, trying to see ahead of them in the gathering darkness.

“An old woman that always scavenged nearby,” Rey explained as she walked. “She was kind to me, which was unusual here. I was always afraid that I was going to live and die here, just like her. Now I can make sure she doesn’t.”

“You want to take her with us?”

“She’s earned it,” Rey said firmly. “I don’t care if she wants to live on Naboo or Coruscant, I’ll give her a house anywhere but here.”

She was determined, and he only sighed as she embraced the startled old woman, who smiled at her with a face that was wrinkled and dry from years spent working in the miserable desert air.

They left Jakku with the woman, whose name was Yamma, and her three grandchildren. They were all bundled in blankets and drinking cup after cup of water in one of the  _ Ascendancy’s  _ guest quarters when Rey closed the door behind them.

“Thank you,” she said, tipping her head tiredly against his shoulder. “For making me go back and for everything you’ve done for them. She told me that they’ve eaten well since Plutt disappeared and that the village children don’t go hungry anymore.”

“No children should go hungry,” he said. “That’s we’re working for and what the galaxy deserves.”

She was leaning against him as they walked, exhaustion masking all of her emotions. “We’ve worked hard and it’s showing, even all the way out here.”

“Yes, but you need to rest,” he urged, pressing the code for the door to their chambers and sweeping her into his arms to carry across the threshold. He would need to get her undressed and into the fresher, rinse the sand from her hair and her skin before he tucked her into bed.

“I will,” she said sleepily. “As soon as we get to Naboo.”

***

They lost Leia and Yamma nearly as soon as the shuttle landed on Naboo. Both of them were swept away by the queen’s women and then by Padme’s family.

Yamma was engulfed in the gentle guidance of many hands as she moved, open mouthed and awed, down the wide halls of the palace and into the lush greenery of the countryside.

There was a small cottage at the edge of the Naberrie garden that had been empty, where she could live and learn to grow vegetables and flowers, draw her water in through the tap instead of the sandy well.

Rey knew that Yamma had been happier on Jakku in the past year than she had been at any other time in her life. Without Plutt’s overbearing presence and the severe restrictions on food and water, she hadn’t been forced to work her fingers bloody just to survive. Still, after everything she’d been through and how much of herself and her own seemingly inescapable future she had seen in the old woman, Rey was relieved to see her settled on a green planet without the scorching suns and the dry desert air.

There was a school nearby for the children, and Rey made a quick call back to the children’s center on Coruscant to ask Rose to start working on a plan for a school for Niima Outpost and the other Jakku villages. It was as a good of a place in the galaxy as any to start working on education programs for the more rural children.

Leia, comfortable and at ease in the queen’s palace, got more tense and quiet as they approached the Naberrie home.

“You’re sure that they want to see me?” she asked for the third time as the large house finally came into view. “It’s been so long, and I never came. Never bothered to get to know any of them.” Her hands fidgeted in her lap, uncharacteristic nervousness making her presence in the Force ragged.

“I’m sure,” Ben reassured her. “They welcomed me and I had done much worse than not visiting.”

“They’re very understanding,” Rey agreed. “You had a family on Alderaan and your relationship with Anakin complicated things. They’re just thrilled that you’re here and they get to meet you now.”

Rey remembered her own nervous anticipation when she had come here for the first time, and Ben’s nearly palpable terror, but it went with Leia as it gone with them and within minutes of arrival, she had been introduced to so many smiling faces and hugged by so many enthusiastic children that her initial reserve melted away.

When the younger women bustled her off to show her around the property, she was smiling wider than Rey had ever seen her smile.

“I’m glad we brought her,” Rey said, her hand over Ben’s as they watched the lake waves crest under the breeze. “She needed this.”

“I promised I would bring her, or at least try to, the last time we came,” he told her. “They needed this, too.”

“The last time we were here, we got married in this spot,” she said, sighing and rubbing a hand over her stomach. The child inside her stirred, his energy a vibrant hum of light and dark that had often made Leia sigh with worry until Rey reminded her that his balance was as it should be. “Everything has changed so much since then.”

“We wanted it to change, but I didn’t expect this much or this quickly. I was still so angry, then, so broken. That feels like a lifetime ago.”

A group of screaming children ran by, grabbing their hands and pulling them down to the edge of the water to watch as they splashed and played in the sand.

They stayed on Naboo for several weeks, handling the affairs of Coruscant and the Senate through daily meetings in the morning and then spending their afternoons picnicking by the lake or visiting many of the large waterfalls that made the planet famous.

The tired dark circles disappeared from beneath Ben’s eyes and he smiled more easily and more often. Rey resolved to make sure that they took a vacation away from the pressures of running the galaxy at least once a year. They were no good to anyone when they had worked themselves to exhaustion.

The Knights of Ren came near the end of the second week, carrying news that they had found a small planet near the edges of the Unknown Regions, beyond Exegol, that seemed to be a potential untapped source for kyber crystal.

They would have to deal with that, Rey knew, when they returned to Coruscant. Finn, and the others who had chosen to carry their studies that far, would need to be taken there and allowed to find the crystals for their sabers.

“It’s another piece in the puzzle,” she murmured as she stood on a green hill overlooking the lake. “Everything is falling into place for us to face the threat that Luke warned us about, whoever or whatever it was that was giving instructions to Pryde. I hate that we can’t see it.”

“We have to trust that we’re capable of doing what we were fated to do,” Ben said, kneeling in front of her to rest his head against her belly as she tangled her fingers in his hair. “We haven’t done all of this for the galaxy and our family just to fail now. We’ll know when it’s time.”

She looked around them, at the lush green grass and the black faceless helmets of the Knights as they stood guard over them because, even here, they were never completely safe.

“I hope so,” she said softly. “I don’t want fear to be the legacy we hand to our son.”


	28. Never Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When they say, “It runs in the family,” you tell them, “This is where it runs out.”- Unknown

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have to apologize because I've been procrastinating and not working on this because it really hit me hard that this is really almost over. I've worked on it for a long time and saying goodbye to them is going to be hard for me. How are all of you feeling now that we only have a couple of chapters left to go? I'm going to try to wrap it up over Christmas break so hopefully everyone is ready!
> 
> Comments and kudos are always appreciated- it gives me so much motivation!

Rey skimmed a finger over the length of inky dark curls and soft pale skin. He was perfect and nothing could have prepared her for the love she would have for her son. 

They’d named him Beker, gently avoiding Leia’s suggestion that they name him after Han, because Ben wanted him to have his own name and his own legacy. He would know about the great people who shared his bloodline, but he would not be defined by it. There would be no hopes pinned or fears to be avoided based on the names he carried.

Beker, only a few weeks old and caring for very little beyond his next meal and a warm body to hold him, was going to be a force unto himself, Rey knew. He was often angry, cheeks pink and hot with the force of his cries as she tried to settle him against her chest. He’d been born with his father’s temper, a fact that seemed to make Ben a bit nervous but amused Rey endlessly. 

She was used to dealing with the quicksilver changes in mood from her husband and she wasn’t terribly concerned about dealing with the same from the little bundle of wiggling outrage currently screaming in her arms.

When she finally got him soothed and curled against her to nurse, she leaned back against the pillows of their bed and sighed contentedly. Motherhood was hard work, and she had been sore all over from the birth and the adjustment to feeding him, but it was satisfying. 

The med droids that came in to constantly check on her and the baby had judged them to both be strong and healthy, and assured her that the wild swing of her emotions would calm when her fluctuating hormones did.

Ben would be grateful for that, since he wasn’t used to seeing her cry so much or often over nothing.

Not that he’d been entirely dry eyed himself over the past few weeks. She’d caught him more than once rubbing a knuckle at the corner of his eye as he held their son, and the joy and love that she felt was echoed back to her from his side of the bond. Both of them were utterly in love with the small life that they had created, though Rey did think it was a little unfair that she’d done all the work and he’d still been born looking exactly like his father.

Well, almost.

She pressed a kiss to his cheek as he finished eating and slipped off to sleep, closing eyes that Leia predicted would stay the paler hazel of his mother.

She walked him to his bed, tucking him carefully into the safety of his little sleeping mat and hoping she could get a little bit of sleep herself before he woke up again.

The door to the bedchamber opened quietly and Ben slipped inside, peering around cautiously until he spotted her and then nodding when she held a finger to her lips to keep him quiet.

He crossed to her on carefully silent feet then wrapped his arms around her and stared down at the quiet miracle of a sleeping baby.

“How was everything at the Senate meeting?” she asked, her voice a low whisper. He had gone back for the first time today, spending his first hours away from their small family for the first time since she’d gone into labor. He’d stayed by her side through the whole thing, clutching her hand and threatening the med droids with deactivation if anything happened to her or the baby.

She was half convinced that was the reason why everything had gone so smoothly, and it had taken only a handful of hours from start to finish. Nobody wanted to risk upsetting the emperor where his wife or the little prince were concerned.

He willed it, and so it had been done.

“It was quiet,” he said, resting his chin on her shoulder and running a soothing hand over her hip. “Everyone seems to be determined to be on their best behavior right now. We should have a baby more often.”

She chuckled and shook her head. “I want more, but maybe we should give it a month or two,” she teased.

He pulled his head back, looking down at her and probing the bond to assess her feelings. “Would you really want more?”

“At least one,” she said. “It would be nice for him to have a brother or a sister. I always wanted one.”

“Yeah,” he was grinning at her, face relaxed and boyish. “I wanted one, too. Maybe if I’d had someone, been less lonely…”

His fears had lessened since the birth, the incredible bond of love that existed between him and his child were enough to convince him that even if they weren’t perfect parents that he would at least know they had tried. His attitude toward Leia had become even warmer, fully understanding now how deep her regret must run to have hurt something she loved this much.

“We’ll wait a little while,” she said, “just enjoy Beker while he’s small but I don’t want to wait  _ too  _ long.”

“Hmm,” he hummed, skimming his lips over her jaw. “How long do we have to wait before we can start practicing again?”

“The med droid told me it might be a few weeks after the birth,” she said, “and that I would know when I felt up to it. Bacta takes care of most of the healing, but they said I shouldn’t rush into anything before I was ready.”

She watched in amusement as he mentally calculated the days it had been since Beker was born, a crease in his brow. “It’s been three weeks,” he said after a moment. “How are you feeling?”

He’d been very focused on being a good father and supporting her as she learned to be a mother, but she still woke every morning with his arms around her and the evidence of his desire pressed against her backside. Not even in the last days of her pregnancy when she had been ill tempered and mean had he stopped wanting her. There was quiet hope in his voice now and the hands on her hips were kneading softly, like he was resisting the urge to pull her closer. She pulled herself up on tiptoe, her fingers gripping the front of his tunic, and pressed her lips to his.

It was all the encouragement that he needed.

He lifted her effortlessly, one arm hooked beneath her knees and the other supporting her back as he carried her quietly away from the small bed where the baby slept and around the corner to where their own bed waited. It was soft and plush, something that she’d become used to since she’d traded in a life of scavenging and war for being an empress, and she welcomed the cushion of it as he placed her on the bed and followed her down, pressing his body over hers. She welcomed it after so many months of discomfort and having to have him while lying on her side or on her knees.

He seemed to feel the same way, hitching her leg up over his hip and sinking as close to her as he could while kissing her deeply. The intimacy was as welcome as the feel of skin on skin and she whined quietly into his mouth, her body already flushed and needy after so long without him. 

He kissed her mouth, her jaw, and worked his way down her neck to lick his tongue across the stiff peaks of her nipples, brushing away her concerns with murmurs of assurance. Her breasts were bigger now, heavier with the milk she needed to nurse, but he didn’t seem to mind the changes as he caressed the curves, and though he didn’t draw her nipple into his mouth as he would have done before, he didn’t neglect them, rolling them carefully between his fingers until she was trembling and her breath came in shallow gasps.

She tugged at his hair when he moved his attention downward to the soft skin of her stomach. He’d never turned from her when she’d been pregnant, when her belly had been rounded and firm with his child, but now it was no longer the perfect flat plane of her body before nor the cute curve of pregnancy. She didn’t want him lingering over it, discovering the softness that she hadn’t adjusted to herself.

He laid his cheek on her hip, looking up at her as his fingers trailed over the new shape of her body, exploring the differences since the last time he’d mapped out the body she lived in.

“You’re beautiful,” he promised, and she knew he could feel her worry in the bond just as strongly as she could feel that he was telling her the truth. “You could never be anything but beautiful to me.”

She exhaled, letting her fears and insecurities flow out with her breath. Ben would never lie to her, especially not about something like this. If he said he still wanted her, she would believe him.

She let go of his hair, her fingers relaxing to trail down over his face, tracing the long line of his nose and the curve of his lips.

“I love you,” she told him, pressing it to him through the bond so he could feel her gratitude and the overwhelming intensity of the feelings she had when she looked at him. It was so much more with every day that went by and sometimes she ached with the love she felt for him.

He smiled at her, relaxed and easy and sure of his place in life and in her heart. “I love you, too,” he said, then nipped at the hip beneath his cheek to make her squirm. There was a wicked glint in his eye that sent a fresh wave of heat straight to her core and when he skimmed over the sensitive skin of her inner thigh to slide a finger into her folds, she was already wet and welcoming.

“I missed this,” he breathed, dipped his head to spread her open with his tongue and gather that wet on his tongue, humming his pleasure against the tight bud of arousal until she pressed her heels into the soft bed and lifted her hips to meet him.

He murmured words of praise that she couldn’t hear, lost as she was in the feelings of her body, and then eased a finger into her cautiously while she clenched greedily around him.

“More,” she begged. “You won’t hurt me, Ben,  _ please  _ .”

“I just want to feel you,” he said against her thigh, his lips hot and urgent against her skin. “It seems like it’s been so long.”

She didn’t deny him, understanding his need from the heavy ache in his voice, so she let him push her legs apart and open her up to his hands and his mouth. He gave her another finger, working it into her beside the first as his lips and tongue pushed her closer to the edge with each hot swipe of his mouth.

She was impossibly wet, she could feel the drip and hear the soft obscene sounds it made when he moved his fingers inside her, but he didn’t seem to mind as he gathered it up spread it messily over her, his thumb finding the aching bud at the apex of her thighs and circling it until she teetered at the edge of her fall into bliss.

He drew his hand away and she cried out at the loss, the tension in her body draining away into nothing more than desperate unfilled need.

He loomed over her as he moved back up her body and she reached for him, her hand searching between their bodies until she found the hard length of him and wrapped her fingers around him firmly. His hips jerked, pushing him into her fist as she explored the familiar flesh, the soft skin over the hard center, all of it hot and pulsing.

She guided him up, aligning him with her entrance, and then pushed up her hips until she was taking him in slowly, clenching around each new inch as soft noises poured from her throat.

They both shuddered when he sank in the last inch and came to rest fully inside her. He pushed forward, grinding his hips into her and ensuring he was as deeply buried inside her as he could go before he began to move.

She gripped his hips, each breath a gentle frustrated sob as he rolled them slowly, every move creating a delicious friction that let her feel the whole of him and began to rebuild the tension of the peak that he had denied her, but hotter and tighter than before.

Her fingers dug into his skin, her nails clawing urgently for some anchor that she could cling to as the exquisite slow slide inside her emptied and refilled her so that it did nothing except increase her frustration.

“Ben,” she begged, tightening her legs around his waist and nipping hard at his bottom lip. “Please, please,  _ please  _ .”

He groaned and grabbed her leg, lifting it until it was pressed against his shoulder and she was open to the first rough thrust. She screamed at the sudden change, the sharp pleasure of the snap of his body into hers, and Ben pressed a hand over her mouth to quiet her before slanting his mouth over hers to swallow the rest of her cries.

He made up for his teasing by setting a furious pace that slammed his body against hers, harsh jolts that bounced her away from him only to pull her back with a wet slap.

He was working into her deeper than he’d been able to in months, hitting a neglected spot that sent her spiraling until she lost everything but him and his body inside her. He reached between them, his fingers finding her wetness and the right spot and matching the tempo of his thrusts until she catapulted into her climax, the tension peaking with an edge that was so fine it bordered on pain.

His thrusts turned erratic as he chased his own pleasure and each of them brought another aftershock of her own, dragging it out endlessly until he finally pressed his hips hard against her and coated her insides in warm waves that matched the waves of ecstasy that crashed into her through the bond.

She lifted her head off the pillow and pressed a kiss to the pulse point in his throat where his racing heart sent flutters skipping just beneath the skin. He tasted of the tang of sweat and the faint hint of soap from his morning time in the fresher.

“Ben?”

“Hmm?”

“I missed you, too.”

***

She woke in the morning to Edelphi knocking on the door, a bright smile on her face that Rey suspected had more to do with the opportunity to cuddle the baby than it did seeing her again after several weeks.

“I hope you’ve enjoyed your quiet time with this little one,” Edelphi said, tucking Beker against her chest with one arm as she tapped her finger against her chin and contemplated Rey. “Today’s a big day for both of you.”

“We have enjoyed it being just our little family for a while,” Rey admitted. “I loved having everyone visit and Leia came every day, but there was plenty of time for us to just cuddle and get to know each other before we had to face the whole galaxy.”

“The galaxy is going to love him,” Edelphi beamed. “He looks like Kylo.”

“I know,” Rey said, huffing irritably. “He’s perfect, but really I did do all the work.”

Edelphi laughed and handed him back, rubbing her cheek against his one last time as she did so. “Let’s find you a gown for today,” she said, turning away to dig in Rey’s closet. “We want something elegant but comfortable.”

“Please,” Rey said, nodding her agreement. “I know we’ll be the center of attention, but I don’t think I’m ready for anything stiff or terribly tight.”

“I know exactly what you need,” Edelphi said, pushing aside several gowns until she found what she was looking for. The dress was blue and looked incredibly soft to the touch. It fit her at the shoulder and then flowed straight to the floor. It would move with her as she shifted, but there were no fitted pieces, no uncomfortable embellishments. It was beautiful for the color and the unusual quality of the fabric but would be the perfect thing for a new mother leaving her comfortable rooms with a baby for the first time.

“This is wonderful,” Rey said, laying Beker down in his bed so that she could step into the gown and let Edelphi begin work on her hair. She rocked it with her foot and hummed a quiet lullaby as the length of it was worked into an intricate pattern of soft braids.

Rey watched as Edelphi worked, examining her reflection with a critical eye. Her face was softer now, gentler, with the planes and angles made less sharp. The lack of training had taken the firm contours away from her body, her muscles softening as she spent her days nurturing instead of preparing to fight.

It didn’t feel entirely wrong, but it didn’t wasn’t entirely right, either. She had enjoyed the time she’d spent with Beker in their little bubble and she did want to have another soon, but she had missed sparring with Ben and spending time with the students at the temple.

She was ready to rejoin the rest of the galaxy and step back into her other roles. She was still a teacher, a politician, an empress. She was also a mother, but she knew she could do all of those things and do them well.

It was time to let the rest of responsibilities back in and learn to balance what she needed to be for the galaxy with what she would need to be for her son.

Ben came in not long after Edelphi finished helping her get ready and she greeted him with a quick kiss.

“Ready?” he asked, looking her over with a smile.

“We are,” she told him, picking up Beker and trying not to wake him as they walked through the palace toward the front steps.

“Hux is already waiting for us and everything is ready,” Ben told her as they approached the massive doors. She could hear the crowd already, packed around the front steps of the palace and hoping to get a glimpse of the new arrival.

“I’m glad this will be short today,” she said, rubbing a hand over the baby’s hair to smooth his tousled curls. “I’ll need to get him back before it’s time for him to eat and it’s awfully loud out there.”

“Just a quick glance is all they want,” he reminded her, pressing a kiss to her cheek and then Beker’s. “They love you and they’re very excited to see that our family has grown.”

“I know,” she assured him. “I’m ready, just a little nervous.”

“You’re doing great,” he said, signaling to the guards to open the doors. “Motherhood suits you.”

Nothing he could have said to her at that moment would have meant more. Her fears about turning out like her parents had also faded since Beker’s birth but it always made her feel more certain of herself to know that he had faith in her, too.

The noise of the crowd, already loud, soared to almost unbelievable levels when they stepped out onto the steps and everyone got their first glimpse of the bundle in her arms. Beker began to squirm and fuss in her arms and she patted his back as she followed Ben to the landing where Hux was waiting for them.

“Congratulations, Empress Kyra,” he said, giving her a formal bow and then a small smile.

“Thank you, Chancellor,” she said, peeling back the blanket to give him a look at the baby’s face. He blinked against the light, his eyes focusing on Hux’s face as he stopped fussing and sighed. “I think he likes you.”

Hux raised an eyebrow but she could feel his delight in the Force. He was a lot like Ben in many ways, and she knew that when he and Edelphi had children of their own he would be doing everything he could to make sure he was the father his own had not been.

The cycle of abuse and cruelty that Armitage had lived through as a boy would not be passed down to the next generation.

She stood quietly, bouncing Beker on her shoulder to keep him happy, while Hux made the announcement of the birth, giving the details on his birthdate and his health. Everyone waiting below quieted to hear him and she was reminded again how much Hux was loved on Coruscant and how much the people respected him.

“The Imperial Galactic Republic presents to the galaxy, Beker Ren, the first child of Emperor Kylo and Empress Kyra,” Hux said, finishing his speech and stepping aside so that everyone could have a clear view of the royal couple and the new heir.

Rey smiled as the crowd cheered, turning her body so that the crowd on all sides could see the baby tucked against her chest. Ben pressed a kiss to her temple and waved at the crowd, letting them have a minute or two of celebration and making sure that the broadcasters got enough footage to send the proclamation to the rest of the galaxy.

Beside her, Ben was silent and proud. He had killed Snoke to protect her and from that impulsive decision, from the early seeds of love that they had shared when they should have been bitter enemies, they had created a family and an empire.

She glanced down at Beker, peaceful and trusting in her arms and then looked out over the crowd. Both of these things now belonged to them and she believed Luke and Anakin’s words, that it was all as it was meant to be, but she would not rest until the nameless threat that lingered over them was finally destroyed.

Taking time to have her child and grow her family had been the right choice, and she was grateful to the Force for granting them those months of peace, but she couldn’t shake the growing feeling that the time for action was coming.

***

Beker’s screams echoed in the still air, his cries terrified and unnatural as Ben threw back the blankets that covered him and pulled his lightsaber across the room and into his outstretched hand. He was prepared to leap over Rey in his attempt to leave the bed, but she was already on her feet and running, robe shoved hastily over her shoulders and her own saber sailing through the air less than a second after his.

Her eyes were wide and terrified as she flicked the switch with her thumb and bathed their silent chambers in soft purple light. Ben left his saber quiet as he reached into the small bed where his son slept and pulled the terrified child into his arms. His heart was pounding, and he turned to Rey helplessly as Beker thrashed and kicked in his arms. He was unable to soothe him, unable to help him as tears ran silently over his rounded baby cheeks.

It was not the first time, but each time was more terrifying than the last and the incidents were becoming more frequent as the weeks went by. Rey searched the bedroom, but they both already knew they’d find nothing.

The med droids told them that the baby was simply having bad dreams, and that while it was unusual for that to begin at such a young age, some children were prone to having night terrors.

He had doubts, and he knew that Rey felt similarly, but there was nothing to indicate that it was anything other than nightmares. The bedroom was always empty, and each fit was followed by a return to peaceful sleep.

Rey sighed and flicked off her saber, letting the room return to the darkness, illuminated by nothing more than the sliver of moon that crept in the wide windows.

“Let me try,” she said tiredly, reaching for the baby after sending the weapon in her hand back to the table she’d snatched it from. Her eyes wet with tears and her presence in the Force was exhausted and frightened. He was failing them both in some way that he didn’t understand, but he felt like he was missing some essential piece of the puzzle, the detail that he needed to understand what was happening and keep them safe.

He handed over his son, his heart heavy and his mind tired and vulnerable, and that was when he felt it- the faint echo of a familiar presence in the Force. It was cold and angry, more vicious than it had been the last time, but no less recognizable. He’d never be able to forget it, not when it had lived in his mind for so long.

He braced himself for it again, for the intrusion that he thought he’d finally escaped from, but it slid by him with no acknowledgement, and when Beker erupted into a fresh wave of tears and terrified wailing, he understood.

It had not come for him this time- it had come  _ for his child  _ . 

Rey lifted her eyes to his, concern written all over her delicate face as shock and disbelief mingled with rage inside him and pulsed out into the Force like the shockwaves of a bomb on the surface of a dreadnought.

“Ben?”

“It’s Snoke,” he snarled, turning in impotent fury to look once again around the empty room, searching the Force like he could tear it to shreds as he searched for tendrils of that presence. It sensed him when he caught a tail end of the bitterness lingering and vanished, nothing more than a phantom of pain and memory.

“Snoke? What’s Snoke?”

“Not Snoke,” he huffed, apologetic as he turned back to pull them both into his arms. Beker was calming, nuzzling quietly into the warmth of his parents as his eyes drifted closed on a dreamless sleep. “Whatever or whoever it was that pretended to be Snoke after the  _ Supremacy  _ …It’s back.”

“You heard it again?” she asked, her hand on his arm as she searched his face and the bond as she tried to piece together what he was telling her.

“No,” he said, tightening his arms around them as a fresh wave of helplessness rolled through him. “I sensed it, just barely, but it wasn’t here for me.”

Her brow creased, confusion settling in for two full beats of her heart before comprehension dawned. Her lips parted, surprise forming her lips into a perfect ring as she breathed her understanding.Her fury, an equal to his own and no less horrified, no less helpless, surged around them and Beker stirred restlessly. 

He sensed her, clearly reacting to her emotions in the Force.

He had almost hoped that his son would have been spared that connection, that he could have been a typical child that carried none of the burdens of the Force, but he had known in his heart that it would never be. Beker was vulnerable, as he had been vulnerable. To being used and twisted, his heart and mind not being his own.

Before Rey could react or do anything more than pull her teeth back over her lips in a furious snarl, there was a loud banging on the door.

She spun toward the sound, her arms clutching tightly to the baby. “No one bothers us unless it’s an emergency,” she said quietly. She watched, fearful and uneasy, as he walked to the door and threw it open wide.

The guards on the other side were clearly frightened of him, but apparently not as frightened as they were of the small woman standing next to them.

“She insisted that she had to see you now,” the one on the left said and Leia tapped her foot impatiently, arms crossed over her long white nightgown. Her hair was long over her shoulder, pulled into a loose messy braid that had obviously been slept in.

“It’s an emergency,” Ben assured him. “My mother wouldn’t show up at this hour looking like this if it wasn’t.”

“Of course, your excellency,” the guard murmured, standing aside respectfully to let Leia enter.

Ben welcomed her in, closing the door behind her and looking down at her as Rey hurried over holding Beker.

“Mom?”

She ignored him, meeting Rey halfway across the room and peering nervously down at the sleeping baby in her arms. “Is everything okay?” she asked, smoothing a hand over the head of dark curls and looking between Ben and Rey. “I felt…panic. His…yours…So much fear.”

“He had a nightmare,” Ben hedged, unsure of how much he should reveal when they were still trying to figure out what was really happening.

Leia turned her head toward him sharply, eyes bright with fear of her own. “Nightmare? Are you sure? Does this happen often?”

“Increasingly often,” Ben said honestly.

Leia sighed, sitting down heavily in a nearby chair and burying her face in her hands. Her shoulders drooped and then began to shake, soft sobs carrying through the quiet room even as she tried to stifle them behind her hands.

“Mom?”

“I can’t do this again,” she said wetly, pulling her hands away from her face to look at Beker sadly. “You two can’t repeat my mistakes.”

“What mistakes?” Rey asked.

Leia sighed and turned her face to Ben. “I failed you,” she said, tears spilling over her cheeks as she held her hand out beseechingly. “I knew, when you were small…I sensed something…and you had such nightmares…” She hiccoughed softly and pressed her hand to her mouth. “I didn’t know that it was Snoke until later, too late. He was after you when you were a baby, and I didn’t know what to do and it kept getting worse, so I sent you Luke…”

“He was in my head,” Ben said flatly. “He told me you didn’t want me, didn’t love me.”

“I’m sorry,” she said, looking down at her feet because she couldn’t meet his eyes. “I don’t know what this is- Snoke is dead- but I can feel the presence of darkness here. It lingers in the air like smoke, and it feels exactly like it did when Ben was a baby.”

“We aren’t going to let anything hurt Beker,” Rey promised, shifting him from her arms to Leia’s and letting his grandmother press him close against her heart and reassure herself that, for now at least, he was unharmed.

“Rey is right,” Ben agreed. “I don’t know what this is, but it has some connection to Snoke, and it must have some connection to Pryde and whatever he was doing with the remnants of the old Empire on Exegol.”

“We’ve searched Exegol,” Rey said tiredly. “We’ve gone over every inch so many times and there’s been no hints or clues left about what Pryde was trying to cover up.”

“I know, but if the cloning was unsuccessful then why was he even there? What did he not want us to see? There must be something that we’ve missed and Snoke is at the heart of it, somehow, I can feel it.”

“What do you know about Snoke? His past?” Leia asked.

“Not much before I arrived,” Ben admitted. “He kept everything very mysterious.”

“Then who does?” Leia persisted. “Who knows about Snoke’s rise to power?”

“Hux knows some,” Rey said. “I’ve seen bits of his past and he was with the fragmented pieces of the Empire that fled Jakku after the final battle. Him and a bunch of other orphans. That was the seed of the First Order and he was raised with them in the Unknown Regions. If anyone we know would have some insight into how Snoke came to lead them, it would be him.”

“Then we’ll find out what he knows and research Exegol,” Ben said. “I’ll send the Knights again.”

“What do you think they’ll learn that we haven’t already?” Rey asked, rubbing at her face tiredly. “We’ve seen everything there is to see and know everything there is to know except a few untranslatable Sith runes.”

“Send Threepio,” Leia said. “He can read Sith runes and if that is all that truly remains there then it must be important. Pryde didn’t reveal himself to keep you away from that planet for no reason.”

“Threepio can read Sith? I thought droids were prohibited from doing that?”

“Threepio was a special build,” Leia explained. “Artoo says Anakin built him himself as a child, if you can believe that. He doesn’t have the required restrictions of a mass-produced protocol droid.”

“Everything works out as it was meant to be,” Rey murmured. “We have all the pieces we need to do this and keep our family and galaxy safe.”

“The Force makes sure we have what we need,” Ben agreed. “The Knights will take Threepio and read the Sith runes on Exegol.”

***

“I can’t believe you actually got Finn to come,” Rey said, leaning over close to Rose so her friend could hear her over the loud music and happy chatter of the wedding guests.

“Neither can I,” Rose admitted, smiling as she bounced a happily clapping Paige on her lap. “He still isn’t fond of Hux but Edelphi has been so kind to me since we came here that I couldn’t say no to the invitation.”

“She was a beautiful bride and I know she’d glad you came.” Rey waved to Edelphi as she passed by, pulling a reluctant new husband out onto the dance floor. “She’s good for him,” she observed and Rose nodded.

“I know Finn probably only came because he didn’t want me and Paige to be alone anywhere around Hux and I don’t blame him after what happened on the  _ Supremacy  _ but…”

“He’s changed a lot since then,” Rey acknowledged. Hux was still stiff and formal but the anger that had driven him in those days had faded away with love and real sense of purpose.

“He is an excellent chancellor,” Rose admitted, “and sometimes it seems that he and Kylo have become almost friends.”

“They have,” Rey agreed. “Not that either of them would be willing to admit it.”

“We’ve made a strange little family here, haven’t we?”

Rey looked over the large ballroom at all the guests. It was an odd mix- old Resistance fighters talking with people who had been First Order officers, new Force sensitives from the temple dancing with senators or diplomats or stormtroopers turned mediators.

“We have,” she agreed. “It’s everything I ever hoped for.”

“Finn’s happy here,” Rose told her. “He didn’t think he could be, when we first came, but he really is happy.”

“I’m glad,” Rey said, spotting him in the crowd talking to Poe and Chewie. He seemed happy and relaxed, not even truly glaring at Hux when passed by them on the dance floor with Edelphi. “He seems to be enjoying his time at the temple.”

Rose winced. “He really is, even more so now, after that trip to New Illum.”

“That green lightsaber he made suits him,” Rey said, trying to keep the corners of her mouth from turning up and revealing her amusement.

“It does,” Rose sighed, “but he won’t stop playing with it.”

Rey laughed, unable to help herself. “They’ve all been like that since they’ve gotten sabers of their own and I know I was, too, when I first got my hands on one. It will pass…eventually.”

Rose groaned, loudly enough that Ben looked at her with concern when he turned up at Rey’s side with Beker in his arms. “He’s getting tired and I think he wants you,” he said, handing over the fussing baby, who immediately started pulling happily on Rey’s hair. “Is she okay?”

“She’s fine,” Rey said with a grin, untangling Beker’s sticky fingers from her hair. “We were just discussing the joys of being married.”

He raised an eyebrow as they both smiled at him innocently.

“Well, I’m going to go over there and talk to Finn and Uncle Chewie where it’s safe and leave you two to it then,” he said, kissing her and Beker both on the cheek before walking away and shaking his head at the laughter that followed him.

Rey turned back to Rose, a teasing comment on her tongue, but before she could speak Mitaka and Poe walked up the table, dropping tiredly into empty chairs and grinning at them. Rey smiled at the sweet way they held hands as they leaned in conspiratorially. There was going to be another wedding soon and she couldn’t imagine a better partner for Poe. Mitaka’s serious and meticulous personality balanced Poe’s recklessness very well.

“You got a new handmaiden, right?” Poe asked. “Since Edelphi is going to be busy with her new duties?”

Rey blinked, surprised by the question. “Yes, I did. Her name is Idalia and she’s here somewhere. Why?”

Mitaka pointed to something across the room and Rey turned to find the young woman pink cheeked and smiling as Cardo leaned down to whisper something in her ear.

“Oh,” Rey said, laughing as Poe wiggled his eyebrows at her suggestively. “Maybe I  _ shouldn’t  _ have asked them to take their helmets off for the wedding.”

“You’re going to have to keep up a steady supply of handmaidens from Naboo,” he said with a grin. “You’ve still got five more Knights of Ren to go.”

“It’ll make a fine royal tradition,” she said, shrugging. “I’ll never complain about our little family growing larger.”

“It’s a good thing,” Poe said with a grin. “Because that’s all it ever seems to do.”

Rose giggled as Poe tugged Mitaka back onto the dance floor but her face turned serious as Beker curled up in Rey’s lap, his eyes drifting closed. 

“Is he still having the nightmares?”

Rey sighed, patting his back as his breathing evened out and his presence in the Force turned serene and gentle. “No, not in the past month or so. We took turns staying up with him at night and trying to keep him protected until we were both exhausted. Kylo thought it might be a better idea to try and trace the presence back to its source, so we both stayed up with him until we sensed it again, tried to follow it in the Force…”

“Did you figure out where it was coming from?”

“It’s hard to feel anything at all once you get as far as Exegol and Ahch-to, there’s too much interference and the Force is too unsettled. We wouldn’t have been able to trace it that far if we hadn’t been working together, but we do know it’s coming from somewhere in that direction. The Unknown Regions, most likely.”

“It hasn’t come back since then?”

“No, it wasn’t happy that we were able to sense it well enough to tell where it was coming from.”

Rose thought for a moment, her brow creased with worry. “The Unknown Regions…You said that’s where the First Order came from? Where they built all their ships and weapons?”

Rey nodded. “Hux confirmed that the First Order was built there and that’s where Snoke rose to power. He doesn’t know how, exactly, just that he was ruthless about it. He was nothing when he arrived, and he took over the whole operation right out from under the officers of the old empire.”

“Officers like Pryde,” Rose said, a hard glint in her eye. 

“Exactly,” Rey agreed. “Pryde was one of the ones that gave Snoke his loyalty to avoid being killed off in the power struggle. He was in charge of the shipbuilding and such in the Unknown Regions for many years once Snoke turned his attention to taking over the galaxy and moved his personal living quarters to the  _ Supremacy.  _ ”

“It has to be connected,” Rose said with a frown. “Everything leads back to the Unknown Regions.”

“And to Palpatine,” Rey said, sighing and glancing back at Cardo as he flirted shamelessly with Idalia.

“The Emperor?”

Rey hesitated, weighing the implications of revealing the secrets they’d uncovered. She trusted Rose and wanted her opinion, but she knew that if the galaxy found out before they were ready it could start a mass panic. 

“We haven’t really told anyone yet, except Leia,” she said finally, “but we sent the Knights back to Exegol and they were finally able to translate the Sith runes that we saw there. They failed at cloning because they couldn’t artificially generate the Force sensitive bodies needed to sustain his spirit, but there were inscriptions about using dark Sith rituals to keep a dead person’s spirit tied to the living realm.”

“So, he’s dead but…”

“His body is gone but we don’t know for sure what might have happened to the rest of him. Sith aren’t supposed to be able to return as spirits the way the Jedi sometimes do, but if they’ve created a ritual to get around that…we just don’t know.”

“Maybe that’s what Pryde didn’t want you to find,” Rose mused. “If Snoke went from nothing to leading everything and Pryde gave his loyalty to Snoke while still protecting Palpatine’s secrets…maybe there’s a connection between Snoke and Palpatine that we didn’t see before.”

“That’s what I’m afraid of,” Rey admitted. “We killed Snoke, but if there was something else, something darker that was helping him and pulling the strings…We don’t know anything about the Unknown Regions or what kind of threat might be lurking there, but they seem to know everything about us.”

“Don’t wait for them to bring the fight to you,” Rose said. “The New Republic made that mistake and it almost cost us everything. You and Kylo have built a stronger and more unified galaxy than anyone has ever seen before, don’t wait for them to find a way to destroy it. Don’t let them hurt your family.”

“We aren’t going to,” Rey promised. “We need to know what we’re dealing with- we can’t go into a war blind on what we’re facing- but we’re sending the Knights and some of the students from the temple on scouting missions. Once we know what we’re up against, we’re taking the war to them.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Naming Reylo babies is one of the hardest things for me but I genuinely like the name I picked out for this story. Beker was one of Benjamin’s sons in the bible, so it's a little nod to the fact that even though the galaxy knows him as Kylo Ren, he's still Ben to his family.


	29. Saving What We Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “That’s how we’re gonna win. Not fighting what we hate. Saving what we love- Rose Tico, written by Rian Johnson for The Last Jedi

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We have one chapter left after this and it's more of an epilogue! I have two very important question for you as I prepare to finally wrap up this story-  
> 1) Do you want a sexy, smutty epilogue or would prefer I just stuck to the plot points that still need to be wrapped up after this?  
> 2) Would you like to see pictures of some of the dresses that imported Rey's looks in this story (her wedding dresses for example?)
> 
> Please, please, if you can let me know if you enjoyed this chapter, I've been very emotional over the ending being so near!

Ben sat beside Rey in the garden that he’d made for her as Beker chased blue butterflies down the path between heavy green branches. He was still a little wobbly in his steps, but he rarely wanted them to help him or hold his hand anymore. He was as fierce and fiery and independent as his mother.

“Have you spoken to Leia, yet?” he asked her, and she sighed. Unease slid through the bond, buried under a layer of staunch determination.

“This morning,” she confirmed. “She’s not happy at the idea of both of us leaving, but she understands that it’s necessary.”

“She’s going to keep Beker while we’re gone? Stand in for us at Senate meetings?”

“Yes,” she said, and then, more quietly, “and if neither of us comes back.”

Ben nodded, bringing her cold fingers to his lips to press a kiss to her knuckles. It wasn’t something that either of them wanted to think about, and they’d spent many sleepless nights over the past months debating whether one of them should stay behind, but in the end…

They were the dyad and protecting the galaxy was a fate that belonged to both of them.

“She seemed surprised that there was so little difficulty in the Senate,” Ben mused. “I wasn’t sure how she’d react to the news that we were planning to move ahead so quickly.”

Rey smiled when Beker pulled a ripe fruit from well above his head, face screwed up in concentration as he reached through the Force to guide it to his hand.

“After years of fighting the New Senate to get them to acknowledge the threat of the First Order she was very surprised at how quickly all the systems heeded our warnings about the rising military we discovered in the Unknown Regions, but I think she was just relieved that this threat is being taken seriously.”

“I wish I could have been with you this morning, but Hux wanted an extra meeting with Edelphi since she’ll be acting as Chancellor in his absence.”

“She’s nervous, but she’s been paying close attention to his duties,” Rey said. “She’ll keep everything in good hands while he’s gone. I trust her and Leia. The galaxy will be okay.”

He didn’t know if she was trying to convince him, or herself.

“It will be,” he agreed, sending her his love and his certainty through the bond to calm her nerves. “We’ve come too far and done too much to lose it all at the end. Our son will grow up with both of us in his life, every day.”

“I know it’s time,” she said, her hand fluttering aimlessly, “but it’s much harder than I thought it would be to leave him.”

“We’re doing this for him,” he reminded her, pushing down on his own fears. He didn’t want to leave his child, or the galaxy that had come to depend on them for peace and stability, but they had no choice.

The Knights had made several stealthy trips into the Unknown Regions over the last several months and they had several students from the temple who had gone to stay there, pretending to be spice runners or slavers fleeing the stricter rules and collapsing crime syndicates.

They had all sent back word of the same thing- the shipyards that had created the First Order’s fleet had not been empty or inactive since Snoke’s demise. If anything, the opposite was true and they had increased production, amassing an enormous fleet that was hovering, nearly finished, just beyond the boundaries of the galaxy.

One spy- Jannah, a stormtrooper that had become a temple student- had been taken in as a soldier in their army when she’d revealed that she had previous military experience. She was a low-level operator now and had little to offer information to offer about their battle plans, but she was worried at how quickly they were preparing to move and certain that their target was Coruscant and the rest of the known galaxy.

Not even Jannah knew who or what they were fighting for. The orders came down from the shadows, from the private command chambers of a flagship that was rumored to be even larger than the  _ Supremacy. _

They had to strike now, when they had the element of surprise, before this army had the chance to bring death and destruction into their galaxy and threaten their family.

Whatever lurked in the background would have to be wiped out.

He lifted Beker into his arms, held him close as he showed Rey the flower he had picked, white petals clutched in his chubby fist.

“We’ve kept all ships active and the military’s ranks all filled. How long will it take to prepare us for war, now that the Senate has approved it?” she asked, shifting Beker to her lap and pushing the dark hair away from his eyes. Leia had been right- they had remained his mother’s pale hazel and he looked from one of them to the other with wise eyes.

“Not long,” Ben told her. “Our main forces remain prepared, but most systems that have military protection have also volunteered troops and ships and others have offered food or supplies.”

“Will we be gone long enough to need them?” He could see the crease in her brow, and he knew she was thinking about the fallen star destroyers on Jakku and the years of war that the Rebellion had fought to achieve that victory.

“Only if we can’t get to the flagship in our first attack,” he told her hopefully. “We don’t want to drag out a war. We want to cut the head off the snake, find out who’s behind this and remove them from their position of leadership.”

“We tried that with Snoke,” she said with a huff. “It did nothing but create a power vacuum that you stepped into.”

“I know,” he agreed. “That’s why we aren’t going to kill whoever is threatening us and then leave. We’ll step into their place, unify their people with our own.”

“Can…can we do that?”

“I don’t see why not,” he said with a shrug. “Look at what we’ve already done. We can’t go back to before Palpatine involved them in the affairs of the galaxy and they already know we’re here and that we have resources to offer that they don’t have. We’ll offer it to them willingly and not at the cost of their lives. That will let us save as many of us and them as possible.”

She kissed him softly, her hand cupping his jaw as she lingered over his lips. “I love you, Ben Solo.”

“I love you, too,” he said with a grin, soaking up the warm afternoon sunlight and the radiance of her smile and the sound of his son’s laughter.

***

It took them only a few short weeks to prepare their ships, their weapons, and their people.

Rey walked out of the palace doors to unusual stillness. The crowd below, usually so raucous whenever they had the chance to see the royal family, was respectfully silent as they crossed from the doors to the command shuttle that waited for them on the landing pad.

Ben walked beside her, as stone faced and strong as the people needed him to be, and Leia followed just behind them, carrying Beker as he waved happily to the masses of people moving restlessly below.

They waved back, all of them, and he smiled brightly, unaware of the tension or the tears that swept over them all as they watched the small group pass by.

They were the last to go, everyone else had boarded shuttles already and would be waiting for them on the  _ Finalizer. _

They paused at the bottom of the ramp, hugging Leia and then Rose, who had been waiting for them on the landing pad after saying goodbye to Finn. She was clutching Paige’s hand in hers and asked in a tearful breathy whisper for Rey to promise to bring him home.

Edelphi, looking regal in her role as temporary Chancellor of Coruscant, hugged them both next, forgoing the usual strict rules of protocol to wish them a safe voyage and a hasty return. She was dry eyed, but her feelings in the Force were a mixture of pride and wild terror.

“I’ll bring him home,” Rey promised.

“I know,” Edelphi said stiffly. “I wouldn’t have agreed to stay behind if I doubted you.”

“Will you keep an eye on Idalia? She wouldn’t come out to say goodbye to Cardo, but she’s been crying all morning.”

“Of course,” Edelphi said, giving her a final quick squeeze. “She’s still new in love and fragile with it.”

“I’m not sure I’ve gotten any less fragile with it,” Rey admitted, watching Ben press a kiss to Beker’s cheek and hand him back to Leia.

“You’ll bring him home, too,” Edephi said. “Have faith and may the Force be with you.”

Ben waited for her as she crossed the landing pad to say goodbye to Beker. He waved at her, babbling and pointing at the shuttle and the dreadnought that hovered just above them, visible even through the haze of Coruscant’s atmosphere.

She brushed away his curls, kissed his forehead, and choked back her tears as she left him.

The ramp closed behind them with a hiss and the shuttle rose into the air as she peered out the front viewport at her home and the vulnerable parts of her family. The young, the old, those who had to stay behind to care for them.

The safety of every single one of them rested on the success of this mission, so she put them out of her mind and turned her face to the sky- to the _ Finalizer  _ and the battle that waited for them.

***

The bridge was crowded when the  _ Finalizer  _ dropped out of hyperspace at the edge of the galaxy. Ben stood in front of the wide viewport with Rey at his side. Their Knights, Poe, Finn, Hux, and Chewie were all with them, scanning the darkness for signs of any threat.

The ship’s usual crew was working the controls, trying to get a reading on the space that waited for them as they prepared to cross into virtually unmapped territory. The archives of the First Order held some, but not much, information about the location of the various shipyards and old bases.

Once Snoke had died, all connection to the Unknown Regions had gone through Pryde and Ben assumed that they had him to thank for that, his time spent with them had apparently been used secretly cleansing their records of most of what might have been useful.

They had pulled together every scrap of information that they could from the spies and the First Order members like Hux, who had spent time in the Unknown Regions. Most of them had been kept to themselves by the older officers, not allowed to mix with the residents or speak to those that hadn’t come from inside the galaxy.

Palpatine had been clear in his thoughts that they were inferior, suitable to be used only for labor, and it played very much in their now, as that attitude had shaped the way his subordinates had acted over the years, leaving them floundering against a threat they didn’t understand.

“Pull up the map,” he commanded, stepping back and watching the white lights from the holograms spring to life before them. The galaxy was a sea of stars and systems, trading routes and hyperspace lanes clearly visible. Beyond that, there was virtually nothing. A few stars and scattered systems, all clustered close to the border, then an endless expanse of black.

“We’re here,” he said, indicating the line just farther out than Exegol. “From what our spies have told us, the new fleet of starships is being assembled in these systems.” He pointed again at a row of bright white spots without names.

“We’ll have to spread out,” Rey said, reminding them of the plan. “Our other ships know where to go, what positions to take to give us cover, but we’re headed here.” She pointed to the brightest white spot. “This is where the flagship is, and where their fleet is being moved as assembly is completed.”

“We’ll hit this area hard,” Poe said. “We’ve designed new fighters- faster and more maneuverable, with better aim and more powerful weapons- and the new bombers are faster and the magnets on the bombs are more powerful. Our ships now are better than the ones they built out here.”

“And we have the best pilots to fly them,” Finn said, clapping Poe on the back. “Once he’s made us a path, we’ll go in. We have to make sure that we get to that command room as quickly as we can.”

“That’s the ship where Jannah is stationed and she’s given us enough info to know that while they’ve added in some foreign tech, the basic layout is similar to the  _ Supremacy,  _ ” Ben explained. “We shouldn’t have too many problems finding what we’re looking for. Follow me and Finn, we know how the inside of a ship like that looks better than the rest of you.”

“Hey,” Rey protested.

“You’ve gotten used to the Finalizer and our other ships like her, but you remember how much larger the  _ Supremacy  _ was,” he reminded her, and Finn nodded his agreement.

“More than twice the size,” he clarified. “It will be difficult to get through with that amount of personnel. We have all the students from the temple that are old enough to fight. Everyone in the galaxy that’s got a lightsaber will be on that ship, helping to cut a path.”

“We’ll have fewer people on board than they will, clearly, but we have everyone from the temple and a battalion of stormtroopers for support,” Ben said.

“And they are, from what Jannah says, better trained than the enemy soldiers. So, we have a chance,” Rey said.

“You have no choice,” Hux corrected. “I’ll remain here and coordinate the movements of the ships and troops, but if you want us to be able to leave any part of their fleet intact and spare the lives of whatever crew is on board, you have to get them to surrender.”

“He’s right,” Ben agreed, and even though he felt Rey’s resistance to the order, she did not contradict him. She knew it had to be done. Surrender or destruction were the only options that they could accept if they wanted their galaxy to remain safe. “If we fail or you lose contact with us for more than one standard hour, destroy the ship and the fleet.”

“Yes, your excellence,” Hux said stiffly.

“We can’t make hyperspace jumps this far out,” Ben said, looking out the viewport at unfamiliar stars. “We don’t have the maps or any markers for navigation so it would be too dangerous. It should take us a week, maybe longer, to get to those systems with a series of shorter jumps. Use your time well, sleep and eat while we can. Everyone needs to be at their strongest when we get there.”

***

Rey slammed the holopad on the table with a low grunt of frustration. They’d made faster progress into the Unknown Regions than they’d anticipated and the ability to communicate with the galaxy they’d left behind had faded with distance. There was nothing here for the ships to use to bounce signals off of, and her third attempt to contact Leia, to check on the stability of the Senate and the wellbeing of her son, had failed.

Ben’s hands settled on her shoulders.

“You know he’ll be fine,” he told her, kissing the op of her head and pressing his cheek to her hair. He was holding onto that thought, and the trust he’d learned to have in his mother- Leia was nothing if not a fierce and devoted grandmother- but she could feel his anxiety through the bond, seeping out like blood from a wound neither of them wanted to acknowledge.

They were hopeful, clinging to Anakin and Luke’s words and the sense of prophecy and destiny that came with being a dyad, but they were also both frightened. Of failing the galaxy, of failing Beker, of losing each other.

And they knew that they were not the only ones.

They were trying to save as many lives as possible, and they were prepared to make certain sacrifices and to take life if that were the cost, but knowing that not everyone in their fleet, on board  _ this ship  _ , would survive was a heavy weight to bear. Some of those who had said goodbye to their loved ones in the galaxy would never see them again and no matter how willing their troops were to fight, or how necessary it was to protect those they had left behind, it was not something either of them could take lightly. Not when they understood all too well how devastated they would be to lose the ones they loved.

She rubbed a tired hand over her face and nodded, accepting his words without comment. He already knew everything she was thinking, there was no need for her to speak them out loud. “I just wanted to hear their voices again before we got there,” she said sadly. “There was supposed to be more time and I didn’t…I didn’t look long enough at his little face the last time we spoke to Leia.”

She hadn’t lingered over their last communication, not wanting to upset Beker or have him see her tears, but if it might be the last time she looked at him she should have paid closer attention, worked harder to memorize the sound of his voice as he’d babbled her name and the way his eyes squinted up when he smiled.

“What if we leave him an orphan, Ben, and he doesn’t remember me? Like I don’t remember my parents? Will he think I didn’t love him enough? That we didn’t love him enough to stay behind?”

“Rey,” he said, voice gruff and he spun her around and grabbed her chin in his hand. His eyes on hers were focused and direct, full of love and understanding but uncompromising. He didn’t bother trying to promise her that her fears were irrational, he knew the odds they were facing, but he knew she feared the idea of hurting Beker more than she feared death, anyway. “No in that galaxy would ever let him think that. They know how much we love him and how hard it was for all of us to leave. We didn’t set out to conquer and put power ahead of our family. He’ll know we were trying to save them.”

She dropped her head to his chest, a small sob of frustration working its way past her lips as he pulled her in close and held her tight. It wasn’t fair that this was their fight, that after everything they’d done and how hard they’d worked to ensure peace and happiness that they had to fight a war not of their own making. She was hurt and furious, bitter at the hand of fate or the Force or whatever higher power had deemed this to be the price of their bond and the love that had grown between them.

Powerful light, powerful darkness. Always there was a cost, a price to be paid in sadness and blood.

Let it be worth it then, she decided, tipping back her head and capturing his lips in a desperate kiss. She’d failed to appreciate what might have been the last look she’d ever get of her son and she would not make the same mistake with her husband.

He must have sensed her urgency and the tide of emotions that threatened to pull her under, because he gave her tenderness that brought tears to her cheeks and then kissed away the paths of wetness that remained behind as he held her close to his chest.

When she wanted more, he gave it, scooping her up and carrying her to the bed with unusual gentleness. His fingers on her skin had never been softer, more worshipful, than they were as they skimmed the tunic and leggings away from her body and skimmed over the curves beneath. His mouth followed every path, memorizing the taste of her as though it might have to last him for an eternity.

He didn’t protest when she did the same to him, her body sliding over the hard muscle, clinging to each second as she committed the moments to her memory, pressing them the darkness behind her eyelids until she was certain that she could call them up again at will.

There were no rushed whispers this time, no hard and driving thrusts, only the slow press of his body and the words of loved that passed between them again and again as they came together, his eyes on hers and his lips against her mouth and his mind forged into one with hers, as much a part of her as his body.

It wasn’t until after, as she lay curved against him with his breath on her cheek that she acknowledged to herself that they had both been saying goodbye.

***

“I’ve got a bad feeling about this,” Rey muttered, her eyes scanning the surface of a black planet, the atmosphere above it clouded with smoke and ash.

They had emerged from hyperspace only seconds ago, not long enough yet for anyone to have sounded an alarm or raised a defense. There were rows of Star Destroyers hovering above it, silently ominous, waiting and ready.

They wouldn’t be silent for long- the  _ Finalizer  _ and the  _ Ascendency  _ were already scrambling their fighters and she knew the other ships in the fleet would be doing the same as they entered the space in their assigned systems. It would have been easier to handle this number of ships with the whole fleet, but they didn’t want the enemy to know that they were targeting this area specifically, it might tip them off that they were aiming for their leadership and give them time to slip away.

Better to make it look like they were here to engage the whole army in the first battle of many.

“We’ve all got a bad feeling about this,” Finn agreed, leaning closer to the viewport and squinting at the enemy ships. “There’s so many of them and they look almost exactly like ours, except for that stripe of red paint.”

“That’s not the only difference,” Ben said flatly. “Look beneath them, on the underbelly of the ship. That weapon? That’s death star tech.”

“Like what you used on Crait?” Rey asked, peering at the closest ship with a shudder.

“Bigger,” Ben said. “That was miniature, portable. This? This would take out a planet.”

“They all have one,” Poe said, horrified. “We can’t let them reach the galaxy. They’d destroy us all.”

“We’re not going to,” Rey said firmly. “Look there,” she said, pointing to the end of the rows, beyond the lines of planet killing super destroyers to the ship that dwarfed them all. “That’s it, the flagship.”

“It’s bigger than the  _ Supremacy  _ ,” Ben said, awe in his tone that made nerves twist in her belly.

“Well, I wasn’t afraid of that when I had next to nothing to fight it with and I’m not scared now,” she lied, patting Finn on the back. “Some of us have been through worse and we’ll get through this, too.”

Ben lifted a brow at her, and she knew he was biting back words about them all nearly dying on Crait, but he left it slide because the rest of the crew sat up a little straighter and trembled a little less. They all knew what the Resistance had done to the  _ Supremacy  _ and they took comfort in the fact that even ships of that size could be destroyed.

Poe was grinning beside her. “She’s right! We’ve been tearing our own galaxy apart for years, let’s use that to our advantage here.”

Ben nodded and turned to Hux, waiting stoically at his side and eyeing the enemy fleet with thinned lips. “It’s time,” he said. “Remember what I said, Chancellor, if we aren’t back…”

“I understand,” Hux said. “Your orders will be obeyed.”

“Good,” Ben said, turning to lead the others from the bridge, to begin readying their fighters for the approach to the flagship.

“Ren,” Hux said, waiting until Ben and Rey both turned to look at him. “Be careful and come back. My wife is rather fond of both of you.”

It was the closest he could come to an admission of concern and they both nodded quickly before turning away as Hux turned to face the viewport.

“Ah,” he said as they walked away. “Finally, they’ve scrambled their fighters. Tell our pilots to engage when ready.”

“He’ll cut a path for us,” Rey said certainly. “Make room for us to get to the flagship.”

“You were right about him all along,” Ben agreed. “I don’t know what we would have done without him.”

“You certainly found a way to bring out the best in all of us and made us an unlikely group,” Finn conceded as he crowded into the elevator between Poe and the Knights of Ren who shuffled to the side with only a few threatening grumbles.

Everyone moved efficiently once the elevator doors opened. They all knew the plan and the part they were meant to play. 

The Knights disappeared behind the dented black hull of the  _ Buzzard  _ as Rey walked briskly to the Falcon where Chewie waited with a handful of the temple students, the ones that didn’t feel comfortable in the pilot’s seat of their own spacecraft. The rest were all capable pilots and settled swiftly into the cockpits of their own TIE fighters.

They exited the hangar in a steady stream and flew straight into an already messy battle that had begun in the short time it had taken them to move down from the bridge. 

“Stay together,” Ben commanded, “and remember not to get distracted. We’re just cutting a path here, let the others do their jobs and we’ll do ours.”

It proved easier said than done as the battle raged around them.

“Red stripe!” Ben bit irritably into the comm system as he was forced to roll his TIE to avoid being clipped by friendly fire.

The fighters that had poured from the bellies of the Star Destroyers differed from their own in only one way, and without careful eyes on their targets, they’d end up taking out their own.

“Sorry,” came a muffled voice from over the comm, one Ben didn’t recognize but that was clearly shaken by the near miss of taking out the emperor. “I’ll swing back around, watch your back.”

“Don’t,” Ben commanded. “Stay here and keep those red fighters busy.”

There was a beat of reluctant silence before the voice on the other end replied. “Understood,” she said, peeling off and returning to the fight just in time to draw off a pair of fighters that had gotten dangerously close to someone from Blue Squadron.

“Thanks,” Poe said sincerely. “She just pulled a friend of mine out of a rough spot. I’m sure Snap’s wife will be grateful.”

Ben grunted an acknowledgement, his eyes scanning the blackness of space for more threats as he spun and twisted his way through the screaming paths of various fighters, closing the distance between them and the enemy flagship, clearing the way for the large troop transport ships behind them.

Rey was just ahead of him in the Falcon, the old freighter a strange and easily recognizable sight amid the sleek black paint and modern lines of the newer spacecraft.

“Eyes just ahead,” she warned. “That dreadnought on the right just let loose a fresh wave of fighters.”

He glanced over, brow creasing at the number of ships dropping into the space in front of them. They were well outnumbered, having counted on the rest of their people to provide enough distraction to get them by without having to stop too often to fight their way through. Each minute that they wasted here was one in which their quarry might escape and take with them the chances of ending this today.

“Be careful,” he cautioned, accelerating his TIE to try and pull even with the Falcon, to not let her fly headlong into the swarm of enemy ships alone. She rolled, the ship turning over and over as she evaded the first rounds of fire aimed in her direction, but he knew she couldn’t outmaneuver all of them and his blood ran cold.

A flash of yellow streaked past him, then another, and he breathed a sigh of relief as the Falcon was able to slide by the emerging swarm as their pilots turned their attention to the arrival of the squadron from Naboo.

He waved his thanks to one of the familiar faces in a sleek yellow fighter and followed the path that Rey and Chewie had made. The flagship was closer now, close enough that he could see the individual hangars as the ship loomed above them, towering up out of space farther than his eyes could see. It had been the same when he’d approached the  _ Supremacy  _ , but that had been comforting and safe- this, despite the similarities in structure, was none of those things. It was a foreign ship, controlled by unseen forces, and there was nothing about it that felt welcoming.

The only thing that felt familiar was the sudden brush of a cold presence against his mind.

He set his teeth and reached for Rey in the bond, letting her feel it for herself instead of announcing it on the comm. He felt her tense and the determination settle over her. This was the thing that had threatened Beker, and there would be no escape from her retribution.

“We’re almost there,” she said clearly, the deadly cold tone of her voice leaving no room for anyone to question her unwavering determination, even in the face of the seemingly unconquerable monolith before them.

Finn’s voice on the comm was less certain. “That thing’s huge,” he said. “Are you sure this plan is gonna work? Maybe we should have brought a few more stormtroopers.”

A sweeping upward glance was all it took for Ben to agree with Finn’s concerns. Rey’s confidence was boosted by having survived incursions into First Order ships and her escape from Starkiller Base, but he’d never told her that he’d given instructions for her not to be killed.

Finn, on the other hand, knew quite well that his and Rose’s escape from the  _ Supremacy  _ had been pure luck, the result of a brilliantly timed attack of which their survival had been a fortunate byproduct.

In spreading their forces out to hide their intentions, they may have not kept enough troops available to get them where they needed to go once inside the ship, even with a small band of newly trained force sensitives.

Several new ships dropped in beside him, firing off several casual but well-placed rounds that took out the canons guarding the nearest landing hangar before the Falcon could get a decent shot. He looked over curiously and the pilot in the ship nearest to his left flank gave him a short wave of acknowledgement, the red light of laser fire glinting dully off a metal helmet.

“Mandalorians remember,” she said, tipping her head and then turning back to face the hangar. It was clear that they didn’t need to ask for extra support, that the group from Mandalore had figured out their target and decided to offer their own invaluable and unique combat skills. “This is the way.”

He had been hesitant when Rey had suggested all those months ago that the beskar collected by the First Order be handed back to the Mandalorians, but once again she had been correct. They had done the right thing, and the galaxy had not forgotten.

There was no time after that for talking, each pilot being forced to use all of their skills as they dipped and dodged their way through the enemy fighters until, one by one, they were able to slide into the large landing hangar.

Ben came in last, bringing up the rear after providing cover fire for the troop transport ships, and found himself unpleasantly surprised to discover that each of their ships had been immediately surrounded upon landing, row after row of troopers, so similar to their own, pointing blasters in their direction. He recognized the style of the troopers, the same crimson armor of those that accompanied Pryde when he had betrayed them on Exegol.

He exited his TIE, holding his hands up in a gesture of surrender, and watching as those around him did the same. The ramps of the troop transports came down, as did the door of the Falcon, and soon everyone had shuffled to the sides of their ships, watching warily as the red troopers barked orders at them in stilted Basic. Whoever these people were, they had obviously known that an attack was coming.

They had already lost the element of surprise.

The troopers began to turn their heads as someone else entered the hangar, a woman with a familiar face that was being escorted by troopers on each side of her. Her chin was tipped up, eyes narrowed as she surveyed the group of hostages.

He knew her, from the temple. Their spy, the one who had passed along much of the information that they had used to form the plan that had led them to this attack.

Jannah.

What could he do to save them now if she had betrayed them?

She said something to the troopers next to her, something low and quick in what he recognized dully as the language of the Sith.

They backed away from her, passing along her instructions, and a large section of the troopers nearest to the Falcon moved forward, their helmeted faces trained on Rey.

A bright flash of purple, curving in a wide swinging arc, brought two troopers to their knees and Ben reached for his own saber on instinct, understanding that the battle had begun with that betrayal.

It had not been Rey’s saber that moved, but Jannah’s, as she split open the Sith troopers closest to her while the others were distracted.

“Come on,” she shouted, reaching out with the Force and knocking several more off their feet. “We don’t have much time before they figure out something’s wrong here and send backup.”

Around him sabers sprang into life. His own white, Rey’s purple, blues, greens, oranges and yellows…even the surprising black in the hands of a Mandalorian.

The Sith troopers backed up momentarily, eyeing them warily as their own troopers lifted their blasters and took aim. Ben thought, for one blessed moment, that surrender might be an option, that the lives of all who were present might be spared, but whatever fear the Sith troopers had of them, they must have feared something else more, because they recovered quickly, moving forward in a surge.

The sound of blaster fire filled the hangar with the vibrating hum of many lightsabers. Blue lightning crawled across the floor, sending several Sith troopers stumbling back in pained shock, and Ben turned his head to find Rey and Finn with their faces set, power dancing at the tips of their fingers as they cleared a path for the rest of them to begin moving toward the door.

Ben pulled on the Force, using it to guide his motions and the path of his saber as he protected those around him. He threw his hand up, freezing a blaster bolt midair in front of the face of a temple student and then redirecting to the panel on the wall that controlled the doors to the passages beyond.

They didn’t know the door codes here, but the blast hit with a shower of sparks and the door slid open on a slow and protesting hiss.

The corridor beyond was empty, with everyone on board clearly expecting them to be executed in the hangar itself. He covered the progress of the others as they made it through the door, Finn stepping through and taking the lead as they pushed on, searching for the private command center that they knew would be in relatively the same place as Snoke’s throne room had been on the  _ Supremacy  _ .

Stormtroopers, Mandalorians, and temple students scurried out of sight around the farthest corner, then Chewie emerged wounded and shaking as he gestured furiously toward the hangar…and Rey.

She was pinned in near the Falcon, covering everyone else from the opposite side of the hangar as he had done from the door, but now her escape route was blocked and the Sith troopers all had their attention focused on her. She was radiant as she held them back with saber and lightening and whips of energy in the Force, but she wouldn’t be able to hold them for long.

He met her gaze, the cold edge to her eyes and she nodded her head once, jerking her chin toward the panel beside him. The button was wobbly beneath his fingers on the damaged control panel, but he didn’t hesitate as he closed the door and then plunged his saber into the panel on the other side, sealing them all inside.

His own voice echoed in his mind, a memory from long ago when he’d reached for her bite of fruit through the bond on Ajan Kloss. “Maybe I’ll be able to just pull  _ you  _ through the bond.”

The bond was alive and vibrant between them, strengthened since then by years of love and sacrifice, and he closed his eyes and followed the thread of it until he could hear her beating heart and smell the sweat and the blaster fire. Her skin was warm under his hand when he wrapped it around her arm and  _ pulled… _

“Thanks,” she panted, a grateful kiss to his lips and looking entirely unsurprised to find herself outside the door instead of inside the hangar.

“Don’t do that again,” he said breathlessly. “You scared me.”

“I knew you’d get me out,” she said, voice more confident than her presence in the Force. She’d been prepared to sacrifice herself, if he hadn’t been able to get to her, but she’d trusted that the odds were in her favor.

“Let’s go,” he said, grabbing her hand and hurrying to catch up with the others when fresh sounds of blaster fire erupted from around the corner. “We’re not done yet.”

They made steady progress, ducking out of sight when they could and making quick work of any skirmishes that they couldn’t avoid. The twirl of colored sabers and the sound of blaster bolts bouncing uselessly against beskar was enough to carry them all the way to the door they were looking for with far fewer injuries than Ben had dared to hope for.

“How do we get in?” Jannah asked, panting as she looked down at a fresh blaster wound on her arm. She’d gotten them this far with the door codes she knew, but she’d already warned them that she didn’t have access to this part of the ship.

Ben placed his hand on the door, on the durasteel that was the last barrier between him and the end of the curse that had haunted his family. Any doubts that he’d had that it would be empty or abandoned faded away when his mind met the energy that had come in the night to torment Beker.

It was furious, enraged that they had escaped the trap in the hangar.

“We’ll cut our way in,” Ben murmured, plunging the lit blade of his saber into the door, and watching as the durasteel around it began to heat and redden. Alone his weapon would not have been enough to penetrate the advanced security features, but Rey’s soon joined his and then others, as all who could reach stepped forward to assist him.

The door began to yield, and he pushed harder until it gave way, the mechanisms failing under the relentless heat and pressure.

“Almost,” he muttered, refusing to turn his head as the sound of many booted feet scurrying up the hallways began to grow louder. More Sith troopers were closing in.

“Go,” Finn demanded, raising his saber into a defensive position. The green light gleamed in his eyes when he looked at Ben. “We’ll hold them off, you and Rey get in there and end this.”

“I’m going to keep our kids safe,” Ben promised him, clapping him on the back as he followed Rey through the small opening in the door and stepped inside. The sounds of battle followed them, but Ben blocked out the sound. He would trust Finn to do his duty, as Finn was trusting him to do his.

“My boy,” said a voice in the darkness. “Long have I waited.”

“Who are you?” he demanded, his gaze sweeping over Rey and then beyond her to the large gold throne that sat in the center of the room. It was so similar to Snoke’s that he feared for one slow beat of his heart that maybe he had imagined the grotesque look on Snoke’s face as his body slid into two halves on board the  _ Supremacy. _

Was he really dead, after all?

“He’s no one of consequence,” another voice answered, amused. “Though he did, indeed, used to be.”

Rey stopped short ahead of him and he felt her confusion, her revulsion, as she took in whatever sight awaited him. She stepped back, coming even with him as her breath came in short, surprised pants.

“What is that?” she said, unwilling to take her eyes off the scene in front of her long enough to even acknowledge him beside her.

Ben pressed his lips into a thin line, unable to answer her.

Beside the throne a woman waited. Her body, cloaked in the same deep crimson as the troopers who did her bidding, was tall and thin. He suspected that she was a female of the same mysterious species that Snoke had been, but he couldn’t be certain. Her face, turned toward them as she reached for them in the Force, was covered in an intricate golden mask, the front of which was perfectly rounded without a single trace of the facial features beneath. She needed no eye holes to see, the gold metal molded in a delicate filigree in a pattern of exquisitely fine lace.

But it wasn’t the woman that had Rey frozen where she stood, not even when the dark hard caress of her mind nearly knocked them off their feet.

It was what waited at her side.

A transparent cylinder filled with a sickly brown liquid and the ghostly face of a man whose flesh was peeling back from the bones. His eyes were hateful and sad...and strangely familiar, as though something Ben had seen in a dream once, long ago. 

“Come,” the woman beckoned, flicking a hand and dragging them both across the floor with the Force. “See how foolish you’ve been, how far you were from victory before you even began.”

“They are foolish, as Vader was once foolish,” said the other voice and Ben looked down at the man in the transparisteel and understanding dawned, cold and terrifying. “Darth Sidious,” he said, flinching. “Pryde said he was dead, one with the Force.”

“It is true that he has no body,” the woman acknowledged, her voice sharp and painful against his ears. “What you see is only a spirit, trapped here by my magic and the runes he foolishly carved into the walls of that useless planet.”

“Exegol,” Rey muttered, turning her own face away from the putrid rot that had overcome the face in the transparisteel.

“He wished to exist forever and now he shall,” the woman said, fingers tapping menacingly against the container as the voice within rumbled threateningly. “Even as he begs for a release that will never come.”

“Why?” Ben asked, pity stirring in him even though he knew Sidious had never felt that for the pain he’d inflicted on Anakin and his wife and children.

“He had something I needed,” the woman said, turning her face to Rey and tugging her forward until she fell to her knees in front of Palpatine’s suddenly watchful and greedy gaze. “Look,” she commanded, “for I know you have the ability to see.”

Rey reached forward with trembling fingers as she reached for Ben’s mind in the Force, pulling him with her into the visions that cascaded across her awareness when her hand touched the transparisteel.

Images moved by in a blur, dark and hazy. A young child, unusually tall and thin, frightened as he clung to the legs of his mother, smuggled in the bowels of a ship. No less frightened when he’d emerged into the sunlight on a planet that seemed foreign to him.

“We’ll be able to find food here,” she promised quickly. “The emperor of this galaxy uses us as slaves for his shipyards, but here you will be fed and safe from his slavers.”

The boy nodded, eyes wide, understanding that the life he’d known was one he wouldn’t go back to.

But misfortune fell on more than just Palpatine, and the boy was now a young man, broken and scarred as he slunk his way back to the Unknown Regions, terrified of the war and the rebellion more than he was of trying his luck in the regions his mother had abandoned, ones that he didn’t remember and that no longer felt like home.

_ I can help you _

The voice in his head made him flinch. Hadn’t his mother always believed that he lied about the voices, the feelings, the things he could do with his mind?

_ I can give you  _ **_everything_ **

The boy wanted everything, but mostly he wanted to never be hurt, never be afraid as he was now. It was alive and greedy inside him and he’d do  _ anything  _ to make sure of it  _. _

“What do I have to do?” he’d asked, and the cold voice became a sensation in his mind, sinking in and taking root.

_ Everything I ask of you, my boy _

Weeks passed, months, years…Bright flashes of time slipping by in quick glimpses of visions, Snoke’s cruelty growing with each memory they saw. Palpatine’s voice in his head drove him, pushing him to be greedier and more bitter as he slid into the fragments of the fallen Empire. He rose quickly through the ranks through fear and murder and manipulation- all under the steady guidance of Darth Sidious.

They watched, shuddering in horror, as the pair of them had reached through the Force for the first time to invade the mind of a babe not yet born, Palpatine’s hatred so strong that even now they could have choked on it.

“We will turn his mind,” Snoke promised. “The Skywalker heir will be our greatest weapon.”

_ Good, good. Vader should never have betrayed me _

There was the hum of approval and the path to victory laid out before them, seamless and smooth.

How then, Ben wondered, had the emperor’s spirit ended up here? Trapped and alone and a prisoner of this woman that none of them had seen or heard of before?

“Who are you?” Ben said, struggling to ignore the visions parading themselves through his mind and focus on the golden shine of her mask. This close to her, he could see the glitter of her eyes as they met his from the shadows.

She didn’t answer but reached down and grabbed Rey’s hand, pulling it from the transparisteel case and pressing it hard against her own mask.

The visions swallowed them again, not of the emperor this time, but of her. Young and wailing as she was ripped from the arms of the same woman that they had seen with Snoke.

“Come on, girl,” snapped a cruel voice. “Off to the shipyards with you.”

Her mother sobbed and a baby at her feet- Snoke?- echoed it with his own keening cry. “I’m sorry, Sorka,” her mother cried as they dragged her away. “I’m so sorry.”

There was nothing for her after that, nothing but years of forced labor and misery. She’d worked her fingers to the bone on the ships that her brother would someday command, lost to her family until the day he’d come for her- scarred, yes, but well fed and powerful in his crisp black First Order Uniform. 

Bitterness and hatred had bloomed in her heart and Palpatine had turned his whispers into her ears, too, blinded by his own ambition to the way her hatred for him and his galaxy formed the center of her darkness. He’d made her a slave and her brother a powerful man...Sorka knew he was going to pay. 

She’d hidden it all from Palpatine and from Snoke and her brother had taken pity on her, born perhaps from his own misfortunes, and provided her with masks and robes to hide the scars given to her by the slave masters’ whips. 

Freed from her miserable life, she’d begun to plot and plan, not content with the role she played being sweet to the spirit of the man who’d caused all her suffering. She was clever and quick and it didn’t take her long to find the old Sith records hidden in depths of what the First Order had kept from the Empire. She’d devoured it all, the language and the secrets coming easily to her as she feasted without caution on the dark side of the Force.

When the last of Palpatine’s plans had been set in motion, his First Order ships prepared to set off for the galaxy and the newly renamed Kylo Ren kneeling at her brother’s feet, she’d acted.

“You know what you have to do,” she’d demanded. “You don’t need him anymore. The First Order is yours.”

“He’s given me everything,” Snoke had protested, his hands clamped over his ears in a futile attempt to block out the sound of Palpatine’s furious screaming.

“And he would sacrifice you in an instant,” she told him, forcing him to confront what he knew was true. “There can be only one ruler in the galaxy. Is it him, or is it you? Become what he’s made you and take your power.”

“Sorka,” he sobbed. “I can’t.”

“You know what he did to us,” she snarled. “What he did to  _ me  _ . Most of the First Order already believes that they follow  _ you  _ and the few who suspect Palpatine’s role in this will never know what you’ve done. They’ll never know that he’s become a prisoner here.”

There was a moment of anguish, where his loyalty was at war with his care for her and, more temptingly, his greed. He could have it all, everything he’d been promised, and he would no longer have to be obedient to someone else’s will. She’d given him the keys to his freedom if he was only strong enough to take it.

Palpatine raged as he was ripped from Snoke’s mind and bound to the enclosure that currently held his spirit.

Rey’s hand dropped away, her fingers curling against her palm as she collapsed at his feet. He bent over her cautiously, cupping her elbows as he lifted her to her feet.

“You were going to betray him, too,” Rey said confidently. “As soon as you had the chance.”

“Of course, I was,” Sorka said. “I spent the years he was gone learning everything Palpatine could teach me. Snoke wasn’t interested in being a Sith, foolish boy, but I saw the potential of resurrecting the order.”

She turned her face away from Palpatine’s case, her finger tracing over the barely visible lines of his captured image. Her anger shook their floor beneath their feet.

“Then you ruined  _ everything  _ ,” she wailed. “You killed him before I was ready to strike and left me out here with nothing. If I wanted to keep my presence a secret and have any chance of taking my revenge on that foul galaxy you come from, I would have to begin again and form a new plan.”

“So, you tried to have us assassinated, then targeted my child, and- when that failed, too- you decided to invade and force us to surrender.”

“I would have preferred to wait longer, for more ships to be built, but you were getting suspicious. You acted before I could, but no matter, the end result is even better. You’ve walked right into my trap, helpless now before the power of the Sith.”

Behind the mask, her eyes gleamed yellow.

“We are not helpless,” Ben said, reaching out with his mind and giving Palpatine’s prison a hard and unexpected shove that sent it careening backward until it crashed against the hard floor and shattered, a rain of foul liquid and broken shards spraying out to coat them all.

He moved quickly, already sure of what would happen next, grabbing Rey by the arms and moving her swiftly out of the way as the spirit rose from the stench of its scattered remnants of its confinement.

***

Rey stumbled back, her eyes fixed on Ben as his body curled in on itself, his face a mask of anguish as the twisted black mist that rose off the floor and wrapped around his ankle before seeping into his skin and disappearing.

When he turned back to her there was no love of warmth in his eyes, only rage and the euphoria of freedom. His hand snapped out, lightning and the whip of the Force exploding out of his fingertips and sending her guards crashing against the walls in a heap, their Force signatures extinguished like a flame that was blown out by a gust of wet rain in a storm on Ahch-To.

Rey’s panicked gaze followed his as he turned to face Sorka and pushed her to her knees. “You will pay for what you’ve done and the years you’ve kept me trapped here.”

“Ben,” Rey pleaded, stepping toward him with her hands raised in desperate plea. “Ben,  _ please  _ .”

Sorka laughed, fearless in the face of Palpatine’s wrath. “You’ll never save him. It took me years of research to prepare to remove Darth Sidious from Snoke. You don’t know the rituals and you don’t have the words. Ben is _ gone  _ .”

Her laughter cut short on a gurgle as her breathing cut off. Ben’s face was twisted, his lips pulled back in a snarl that Rey knows does not belong to him. His hand was lifted, his gaze focused on Sorka’s face as she clawed helplessly at her throat, but Rey couldn’t feel him in the Force, his presence buried under the consciousness that had overridden his own and taken control of his body.

“No,” she begged, scrambling over the floor to catch Sorka as she fell. “Ben, let her go.”

“ _ Ben  _ ,” he mocked. “  _ Ben  _ is gone, and you will be the next one to die. With you out of the way the galaxy will fall to me and the Skywalker heir will be the key to my return after all.”

Sorka’s body fell limp, her head lolling back as Rey tried to grasp what was happening. Why would Ben have done this when he must have known the consequences of releasing Palpatine?

He must have thought they had a better chance of defeating him than they did taking on Sorka and her guard, he wouldn’t have done something so reckless without cause. But how, how was she supposed to reach him now when Palpatine had such a hold on his mind. Did he expect her to kill him?

She remembered his orders to Hux, the certainty that he had that their lives must come secondary to the safety of the galaxy. He would sacrifice himself, absolutely, but could she bring herself to do it and was that even the right thing to do?

Voices crowded her mind, welcome and familiar.

Luke.

_ I can’t see the future, it’s clouded in darkness, but there’s a threat looming over you _

Anakin.

_ The Force has been at work in your life since before you were born _

_ Your strength is in each other _

The Oracle on Mustafar.

_ You share two halves of the same soul, a reincarnation of the prime Jedi _

_ Neither light nor dark, but the physical representation of the balance between them _

They were the only ones who could do this. The Force had joined them together for a reason, given them every tool that they would need to bring balance and peace.

Rey’s hand, wrapped around the hilt of her saber, fell away. She would not destroy Ben to destroy Palpatine. She dealt violence when it had to be done, but not like this.

She reached instead for the threads of their bond, closing her eyes as Palpatine raised Ben’s hands and his saber far over her head poised to strike. She followed the bond, strong and vibrant in the whirling energy of the Force until it disappeared into the cold dark of the emperor’s energy…and then beyond it. Beyond the barrier of his mind, beyond the barrier of the dark and death and malicious intent to where she found Ben, his consciousness curled up and waiting for her.

He was calm and quiet, his awareness focused on only one thing- the thin shimmering thread that connected him to her. Warmth flooded through them when she touched her mind to his and he reached for her, following her back along the path she’d laid down for them until he was able to push out the spirit that had claimed his body and come back to her.

There was a spark of recognition in his eyes as he lowered his arms.

Across the ground near his feet a black mist crawled, moving desperately toward her as she backed away in fear. It slowed, twisting in agony until it disappeared, fading slowly into nothingness.

“Without a body to inhabit or a jar to hold him, he couldn’t remain in the world of the living,” Ben said, shaking his body to rid himself of the lingering rotten feel. “We destroyed the runes on Exegol that barred him from becoming one with the Force, so there was nowhere else for him to go.”

They both turned as Sorka began to stir, small piteous moans escaping from behind the mask that told them that she was alive but unwell after her encounter with her Sith master. She turned her head to take in the scene around her, looking at Ben and Rey as they held tightly to each other in the middle of the throne room. She cowered in fear as Ben stood and flicked his saber to life, the white beam uncompromising as he pointed it at her chest.

“Stand down,” Ben panted. “Make the right choice for you and your people or be destroyed.”


	30. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams- Eleanor Roosevelt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, this is it! The story is finally finished! I really hope you enjoyed it and that you feel like they have gotten the ending that they deserve. Feel free to let me know what you thought of it. I'm feeling really emotional that this has finally come to an end and I just want to say thanks to all of you for reading this. Your kudos and comments are literally the reason I was able to finish this!
> 
> I will add another chapter after this, but it will just be for the pics of the inspiration gowns since some of you wanted to see them!

“Mama!”

Rey turned at the sound of the small voice, nearly drowned out by the echo of rapid footsteps barreling down the corridor of the  _ Finalizer.  _ He was meant to be asleep already, but it seemed that Beker had other ideas.

She lifted him smoothly onto her hip when he reached her, his hands cupping her face as he pressed a sloppy kiss to her cheek.

A tired woman in a black Imperial Republic uniform scurried after him.

“My apologies, Empress Kyra,” she panted. “He wanted to say goodnight.”

Rey smiled, trying to put the woman at ease. She was new to her position and not yet used to dealing with the antics of a Force sensitive toddler. “It’s fine,” she assured, patting Beker’s back gently as he dropped a tired head onto her shoulder. “I finished with the meeting earlier than I expected to, anyway.”

After more than a week visiting family on Naboo, Beker was tired and cranky, more than ready to settle back down into his routine at home on Coruscant, and Rey and Ben had both needed to step away and attend to some of the business that had accumulated in their absence.

Rey’s evening had been spent discussing the expansion of the trading post on Jakku, one of the many expansions that the galaxy had needed in order to keep up with the new territory that they’d gained in the Unknown Regions.

Ending slavery at the ship building yards had been only the beginning of the challenges they’d faced after Sorka had officially surrendered- a last moment decision done only to prevent her own death- but after the last two years of diplomatic work and economic negotiations, things were finally falling into place in a way that benefitted everyone.

Sorka was still bitter and forbidden from leaving the temple on Coruscant, but she was alive, the galaxy had healed, and even the darkness that Palpatine had spread beyond the boundaries of the galaxy had finally begun to fade.

Ben turned the nearest corner, the one that Rey knew led to the bridge, with the Knights behind him and stopped, eyeing his small family for a moment with a smile before straightening and walking over to wrap his arms around her. He reached out with his mind, shifting Beker’s weight from her arms to the cradle of the Force without disturbing his now sleeping son.

“You shouldn’t be lifting him,” he reminded her gently, pressing a kiss to her temple. “Remember what the med droids said? About waiting until the baby is born?”

Rey snorted indelicately, but she let Ben take him and gave the new nanny permission to take the rest of the night off. Beker was a sound sleeper, no longer troubled by nightmares, and she wouldn’t be needed again until morning.

She wouldn’t have been needed at all, if the med droids hadn’t told Ben to keep Rey from lifting her son or engaging in any other strenuous activities.

“It’s such a long time till the baby comes,” Rey protested.

“But you and the baby have to be healthy,” Ben argued. “So, no lifting him.”

Rey froze, her head tipping as she stared at her husband through the ghost of a memory.

“What is it?” he asked. “Are you okay? Is it the baby?”

“No,” she said quickly, resuming her walk toward their chambers. “Nothing is wrong. It’s just…Do you remember when you came to me after Crait? The first few times we saw each other?”

“We did nothing but argue,” he said with a grin. “You were very stubborn.”

“Hmm,” she hummed, one brow lifting in silent contradiction about which of them had been stubborn in those days. “You showed me a vision of our future,” she said, “of what you wanted our lives to be.”

“I remember.”

“It came true,” she said quietly. “All of it. Me being your empress and being pregnant on Naboo, and this moment right here with Beker and the baby.”

“It’s not exactly the same,” he said, smiling down at her “but it is very close, isn’t it?”

“Very close,” she agreed. “You knew all along that was a real vision and not just fantasies that you’d conjured up, didn’t you?”

“I didn’t know when I showed it to you,” he said, “but I hoped it would be true. I already loved you so much.”

“I loved you the moment I met you,” she said. “It just took me some time to figure it out.”

They didn’t speak again until Beker was tucked into his own bed, both lost in their own thoughts as they contemplated the future that might be ahead for their family.

Rey sighed when the door to Beker’s chamber closed quietly behind them. “I’m so glad that this baby will never have the nightmares that Beker had. Everything feels so much safer this time.”

“It does,” he agreed. “Have you thought any more about a name for her?”

Rey frowned and sat down at the small table in their chamber. She popped a piece of fruit into her mouth- she was still always hungry- and watched the bright lights of the stars as they streaked by outside the viewport. “I don’t know,” she said after a moment. “She feels so dark compared to Beker. Nothing I think of seems appropriate.”

“I’m sure my mother will be thrilled that you’re birthing another child with shades of darkness,” Ben said dryly. “She was already so nervous about Beker.”

Rey nodded. “I think our daughter will have more of that inside her than you or Beker ever have. We will have to guide her carefully and be mindful of our fears.”

Ben’s eyes drifted to the viewport and the streaks of light beyond. “Then her light will shine all the brighter. If her mother was the sun, then she will be the stars.”

Rey smiled. “I used to look at the stars at night, sitting on top of that terrible AT-AT on Jakku. I could tell the directions from the constellations in the sky.”

“What was your favorite?” he asked, and she knew that he would never get tired of learning new things about her.

“Lyra,” Rey answered. “The stories said that she was a young girl who wanted too much. She wandered too far into the desert seeking scrap and got lost. She would have died, but she followed the light of the stars until it brought her back home.”

“Lyra,” he said, looking almost as though he was testing the word on his tongue. “A perfect name for a daughter born in darkness.”

Rey considered it, hand resting on her stomach, only just beginning to round with new life. “So that she may always remember that she can follow her light home. I like it.”

He reached for her hand and she took it, as she had done every day for the last four years. She laughed when he tugged and pulled her out of her own chair and into his lap.

“You have that look in your eye,” she said primly, when his hands settled on her hips and his gaze became heated. “Was this morning not enough for you?”

“I’ll never get enough of you,” he promised, nuzzling his cheek against the curve of her breast. “I want you more now than I did when I thought I could never have you. Every taste of you makes me only want you more.”

“Hmm,” she said doubtfully. “Perhaps you should taste me again? Just to be sure?”

He seemed to need no further encouragement, lifting her carefully as he stood and then carrying her across the room to stand her on her feet beside their bed. He placed her down like she was fragile, a precious artifact that might be snatched away from him at any moment.

She enjoyed all of their lovemaking, each of his moods bringing her something that she needed, but it was always a little bit special on occasions like this, when his hands on her skin were feather light and he stripped the gown from her body inch by inch and kissed the newly bared flesh each time.

“Will you take this off?” she asked, fingers gripping the edge of his tunic when he had stripped her bare and vulnerable. “Or shall I?”

“Would you like to?” he asked, and his hands were already busy elsewhere, his fingers skimming delicately along the sensitive skin at her sides.

“I do like to look at you,” she mused. “Even after all this time, it’s still like unwrapping a present.”

He laughed, helping her as she lifted his tunic over his head and then tossing it aside.

Seeing the wide expanse of his chest and the muscle that defined his arms and shoulders, still strong and powerful with hours of training in the temple, always made her eager to touch him and her hands settled quickly against his skin.

He’d been so sweet and attentive as he’d undressed her that she was already nearly vibrating with need and her hands roamed over his chest and his stomach before inevitably finding the fastenings of his pants and tugging at them with practiced efficiency.

There was a small wave of resistance in the bond, a moment of hesitancy, and she knew that what she had in mind would be a derailing of his own plans.

He watched her as she pushed his clothes down over his hips and she could feel his eyes on her face, but she knew that by now he was wise enough to know that there was no stopping her once she’d set her mind to something. Not when he was nearly as eager as she was and was only reluctant because he’d wanted to nestle his face between her thighs.

She’d still let him, just after she was finished with her plans.

“Sit down,” she instructed, giving him a little shove with the Force. He’d been so soft and generous with her lately, probably because of the pregnancy, but she needed to give something back.

She knelt between his spread thighs, keeping her eyes on his as she traced a path up the length of him with the tip of her tongue. His hands fisted in the blankets on either side of him and she smiled.

He’d never admit it, but he loved her teasing and the barely there, almost imperceptible touches would only make him that much more responsive when she finally gave in and took him into her mouth completely.

She kept him poised on the edge as long as she thought he would stand it, using his feelings in the bond to create the most infuriatingly tantalizing pattern of licks and kisses that she could, until his hips were jerking uncontrollably with each touch of her mouth and his grip on the bed sheets had turned nearly violent.

The noise he made sounded almost pained when she finally wrapped her lips around him and drew him into her mouth. She knew that he liked this, not just the feeling of her lips and her tongue but the sight of her taking him in. It made her vulnerable and showed the trust and love that felt more him more completely than almost anything else they had ever done together.

She had the memories that he kept of her, the most treasured moments that he stored inside his mind. Their first meeting, the day she married him, her coronation as empress…and tucked in among the others was a memory of the first time she had knelt at his feet and taken him into her mouth. The image was polished even now, taken out and often examined as he remembered how it had felt to see her that way.

Her eyes had been as bright as the stars in the viewport behind her.

She gave it back to him now, that memory. Showing it to him for the first time from her own perspective. How much she had wanted and how beautiful he had been looking down at her with the reflection of stars in his eyes, their galaxy reflected in the gaze of the person who had given it to her.

He went still as the memory washed over him, taking in the knowledge that she cherished that moment as much as he did, and then pulled her up from her knees.

“I just…I need you,” he said quickly, and she understood that perfectly.

Sometimes any distance between them seemed like too much and only having him inside her could diminish the ache. She was never sure if it was the dyad or just that she loved him so much, maybe it was both, but in the end it probably didn’t matter.

She pushed him back until he was lying comfortably among the pillows and straddled him. It was easiest this way when her pregnancies had started to show, but she knew she’d soon miss having him on top of her as she had by the time Beker was born.

For now, she was content to take him in as she pressed down onto him, his hands coming up to grasp her hips or cup her breasts. She rose and fell over him, her body moving to a slow and sensual rhythm that was in no rush to get anywhere.

There would be time for ecstasy, but she wanted to hold onto this moment for as long as she could and hold onto the image of him as he watched her with such devotion in his eyes.

Someday she’d send this memory to him through the bond, so he’d know how full her heart was and how beautiful he’d looked with his dark hair falling out of place onto the pillows and curling against his forehead, damp with sweat, and his bottom lip tucked, plump and red, between his teeth.

He’d given her the galaxy, all of the green and the people and the love that it could hold, and she would have given it back for this moment.

To see him like this and know that he was hers.

Even perfect moments couldn’t last forever and soon the steadily building need that spread through her body couldn’t be ignored and she increased her pace, her hips shifting harder and more quickly to take in more of him. He moved beneath her, his body arching to meet each greedy rock of her hips.

In the end it was as it had always been, just pleasure and the steady pulse of his presence in the Force.

It echoed back to her a moment later, his peak and the love he felt for her pooling into her through the bond until the combined strength if it skims along her skin like the lightning that she sometimes shoots from her fingertips to amuse the students at the temple.

She curled against him, her head on his chest, as his fingers danced along the bones in her spine and their breathing returned to normal.

“Ben?”

“Hmm?”

“Show me again?” she asked, tipping her head to look at him. “The future you hope for now?”

“Do you think it will come true again if I do?”

“It might,” she said. “I think it will, if we believe it.”

He reached for her across the bond, her mind filling with images in a quick rush of sound and color.

A temple full of students, each of them relaxed and happy and unafraid. A boy, Temiri, who had come to them at Rose’s suggestion from Canto Bight, laughing as he held a blue lightsaber and sparred playfully with what could only be an older version of Beker.

The scene shifted and now they were older, settled into positions of meditation side by side. She smiled and looked down as Artoo beeped that he had not seen such closeness in the temple since the days of Anakin and Obi Wan.

This time, when the young man fell in love with a bright and beautiful young woman- a girl with friendly eyes and hair of flaming copper- the temple did not fall. Temiri only laughed and warned against the chancellor’s infamous talent of seeing everything that happened on Coruscant as Beker kissed his beloved in the temple hallways.

A dark headed young woman walked by and huffed, eyes rolling fondly at the sight of the young lovers. She was beautiful, striking but not soft, and her eyes were Ben’s eyes- the color of Corellian whiskey and full of mischief.

Unlike the young men, she was not wearing the robes of a temple student, but the gown of a diplomat. Power surged around her, and she controlled it with ease, but the scene shifted, and she was standing beside Ben in the Senate chamber, her voice passionate as she debated matters of law and policy. Leia looked on proudly.

Lyra was beautiful at her wedding, her lips smiling and eager against those of another young woman. Something about her felt familiar and Rey turned to see Finn held Rose tightly as she sniffled, and Rey realized that they were family now in the truest sense. This Paige would get the happiness that her aunt had not lived to see.

Everything faded away and all that was left was a bedchamber and Ben, his hair graying and his smile still full of love. “Where would you like to go?” he asked. “Now that Beker and the others have the temple well in hand and Lyra has become the new Ren?”

She smiled and stepped into his arms. “Somewhere green,” she said. “Show me all the green in the whole galaxy.”


	31. Gowns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is just the pics of Rey's outfits and dresses

Some of the pieces that inspired Rey's training outfits. 

Her first wedding dress and wedding night lingerie.

The two gowns that inspired her wedding dress for the ceremony on Coruscant.

A selection of some of the gowns that I used for inspiration for the rest of her gowns. She was well dressed and sexy the whole time!

Blue-

Neutrals-

Black-

Red and purple-

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, hope you are enjoying the story so far! This is my major WIP and my favorite story!
> 
> I live for feedback, especially here since this is my first attempt at a novel length work, so comments and kudos are always greatly appreciated! Let know what you'd like to see, what your theories are, and how you are feeling about the characters!
> 
> If you like this story, my other works can be found at https://archiveofourown.org/users/Love_andbalance/works
> 
> I'm also on Twitter @Love_andbalance so you can follow me there for story updates!


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